Laura Freeman

April 4, 2016
Prof. McCoy & Moore
Tell Your Grandma to Go Home

From reading The Loudest Duck by Laura Liswood, chapter three-titled Tell

Your Grandma to Go Home, really stuck out to me in terms of gender and diversity in

the workplace. There are a few themes within the chapter from Liswoods point of view

that are important to note. In the beginning of the chapter, Liswood talks about what

exactly a Grandma is and how it is interpreted for different cultures and how it is used

in the workplace. The other theme, and the most interesting, is about where our perceived

notions came from and how our unconscious helped to shape how we are today. All of

these themes are going to be specifically related to gender in order to understand the

concepts and how people can acknowledge these concepts and use them to better the

workplace.

Almost everyone has had a grandparent who has lessons to share. This is where

the Grandma theory originated. Grandma is considered to be the channels of influences

provided to us throughout our lives that provide us with inherited unconscious beliefs

about the world, other people and ourselves. She says we always bring Grandma with us,

even in the workplace. The Grandma theory can be perceived in different cultures as

well. For example, in the United States, Grandma customarily taught men that the

squeaky wheel gets the grease, implying that the person who complains the loudest often

receives the most attention (page 50). This saying could also be interpreted as if you

speak up in class, at work, or at a party you will get noticed and even rewarded (page

50). However, in different cultures the saying is similar but has a very different meaning.

For example, In Japan the saying is the nail that sticks out gets hit on the head and in
Chinese culture Grandma says, the loudest duck gets shot (page50). These sayings are

the complete opposite to the squeaky wheel. In Asian cultures, the people who speak up

are discouraged for doing so and are definitely not rewarded for it. Another saying is,

often told specifically to girls- that if you cant say anything nice, dont say anything at

all (page 50). As a manager, it is important to understand the different cultures and their

Grandmas so the work environment is benefiting from the diversity set in place not being

harmed by it. If people of the Asian nationalities and women are not inclined to speak up

but to diligently listen then it is important for a manager to get them involved and not

disregard their silence for lacking ideas or being disinterested. If the wheels are the only

ones speaking then there is no diversity in the workplace. The wheels are typically men

based on what they are taught as young men. Women typically are taught not to speak

unless spoken to. This can be harmful in the workplace because it is important in todays

culture to speak up and make sure your voice is heard. If not, the wheels will be the ones

considered for promotions or raises and the ducks, the nails, and the nice people will be

left in the dark. Even if we were not taught these different sayings growing up, there are

other driving forces that shape the way people think and act today.

There are five different forces from which our unconscious mind originates from:

our parents, experiences, peers, religion and culture, and myths, fairy tales, fables, and

the media. Three of them really stuck out to me in terms of gender, parents, experiences,

and myths, fairy tales, fables, and the media. Our parents were primarily the first people

to care for us and tell us about the world. We grew up with their ideas and ways of

thinking for a majority of our lives. They also gave us guidelines based upon our gender,

for example, girls should do one thing, or act a certain way; boys should act another
way, and are expected to behave differently (page 56). Children also observe their

parents and will pick up on things like how they react to hearing that their child is

gay or lesbian or even listening to them explain nationalities, skin color, and their

own ideas about the differences (page 56). We may grow up to realize their way of

thinking is incorrect or negative, but we absorb it nonetheless. Within our experiences,

we take what we see and learn from the world around us. For example, if there is a wall

full of pictures of past presidents of the company in a hallway and they are all old, white

men, it is prominent that white older men are the valuable people within the company.

The example that I found particularly interesting was in the myth section. When I was

younger I used to watch Disney movies all the time. The basic plot of almost all the

princess movies was that the girls are the damsels in distress and the prince is the on who

comes and saves them. For example in Cinderella, the Prince who falls in love with

her, finds her lost shoe, and swoops in to rescue Cinderella from her terrible life (page

62). Growing up with this image of men and women can influence people much more

than they may think. Liswood states we start with Cinderella and Superman, and end up

carrying our knowledge of the way the world works- of who rescues and who needs to be

rescued- right into the workplace (page 63). This was interesting to me because, being a

female, I may have a different perspective on males based on some of the things I have

seen in the media and movies. It is important to realize this so those thoughts towards

males will not affect my performance in the workplace or how others will perceive me in

the workplace. We each have our own narrative, our own story about who we are and

who others are. We react to others and others react to us through that narrative, whether
our story is true or not (page 54). Being aware of the differences in cultures and

Grandmas will be crucial for gender and diversity equality in the workplace.