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<font color="#00FF00"> The Simpsons 27x08 </font>
<font color="#00FFFF">Paths of Glory</font>
Original Air Date on December 6, 2015

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D'oh!

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== sync, corrected by <font color=#00FF00>elderman</font> ==
<font color=#00FFFF>@elder_man</font>

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Yes, uh,

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the students
of Springfield Elementary

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have each created
an alternative energy vehicle.

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One of which will ensure
the future of humanity

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as determined by a short race
across the parking lot.

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Yeah, yeah.

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And now, uh, what is
your car powered by, uh,

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fat little boy?

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Hydrogen-powered fuel cells.
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Ah, hydrogen--
yeah, yes, wonderful.

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My car is powered by the wind!

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Oh, how it blows.

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Mine is potato-powered.

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I keep tell you
I'm not a potato.

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Be quiet, hash browns!

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Dad, I'm so excited!
I think--

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Hey, please don't
stand so close.

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In the world of solar power,
shadows are the arch-enemy.

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I think I might win.

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I believe in you
and that's a given.

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But I don't know.

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That kid's car has flames
painted on the side of it.
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Why would he do it
if it wasn't fast?

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Children, start your engines!

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They're not engines!

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That's the whole
point of this thing!

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Yeah... just go.

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That never works.

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Yahoo!

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I'm sun-made racin'!

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Duff Beer, the only way

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to get fathers
through kids' events.

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Huh?

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What? No!
That shouldn't happen!

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I should have stored energy!

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You skimped on the cadmium
in your batteries,

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just like a girl.

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Stick to the liberal
arts, honey.

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Uh, have fun going
to Oberlin!

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Maybe you can transfer
after a couple years...

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to Bates!

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Enjoy Maine in the winter!

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Hope you like
Division III basketball!

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Now, don't you worry, kid.

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They also laughed
at Amelia Vanderbuckle.

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Amelia Vanderbuckle?
Who's she?

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Ah, she was Springfield's
original lady inventor.

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Ah...!

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Why have I never
heard of her?

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Well, totally nuts.

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She made a mess of everything.

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Oh!

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Easy, girly, don't go
Vanderbuckle on us.

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"Amelia Vanderbuckle
lived in Springfield

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"in the 1800s.

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"She was the middle child
of a family of 17.

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"12 of whom died
from exposure to drafty windows.

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Her father worked as a human
canary in the poison mines."

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"Amelia was the first

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female graduate
of Springfield Tech."

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Do you have to
read out loud?
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I'm trying to pour ants
in this doll.

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"Among other things,
she was the proud inventor

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of the steam-powered
barber chair."

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I want one!

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"A medical board
diagnosed Amelia

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"with acute feminine
overreachism and she was--

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"She was committed

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to the Springfield Home
for the Criminally Different."

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Whoa, the banana cabana?

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"But Amelia never gave up,

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"continuing to work
as an inventor

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within the confines
of the asylum."

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<i> Ay, carumba!</i>
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Bart, if we find
those inventions,

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we can prove that Amelia
was scientifically significant.

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Pass.

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Listen to me.

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I need to prove
this woman was not a lunatic

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so people will not giggle
when they hear the words

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"woman scientist."

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"Woman scientist."

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What's next--
boy cigarette girl?

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Let me ask again.

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Will you help me break into
an abandoned insane asylum?

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Abandoned asylum, where
have you been all my life?

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How do we get in?
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Well, I'd say
the best bet

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is the sewer pipe.

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Oh, gee.

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Oh, come on, Bart.

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Or this door.

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Bart!

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The ghosts of a thousand
lunatics are making me hot.

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Yeah, what doesn't
make you hot?

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Alcoholic stepfathers.

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Ew! Stop that!

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You don't know who had
that in their mouth.

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Sure I do--
some luno!

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Mmm, that's good crazy.

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Ew.

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"Vanderbean, Vanderbottom,

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Vanderbozo--"
ah, here we go--

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"Vanderbuckle!

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"Vanderbuckle, Alfred;
Vanderbuckle, Alice;

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"Vanderbuckle, Allspice;

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Vanderbuckle, Amelia"!

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A wax cylinder!

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Amelia recorded her voice!

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Mm.

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Though I have been locked up
in this sanitarium

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for lo, these many years,

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I have completed an invention
that will change the world!

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Bart! Did you hear that?
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Good evening.

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Because I am not taken seriously
due to my gender,

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a friendly guard
has hidden my invention

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until a future time,
when some liberated young woman

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has the permission
of her husband to look for it.

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There's a whole closet
of these things!

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How many magicians
do they have in this place?

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Find my journal,
and it will lead you

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to my greatest invention!

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P.S. Nikola Tesla might have
told you he broke up with<i> me,</i>

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but I broke up with<i> him.</i>

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Aah!

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We've got to find that journal.
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Ooh!

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"Dear Diary, today I watched
a neighbor's house burn down.

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This will teach their dog
to laugh at me."

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Whoa! Look at me!
I'm enjoying reading!

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Guys, did you
ever read something

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and think it was written
just for you?

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Behold...
the diary of Nathan Little!

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"I pushed a vagabond
under a trolley."

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What's a trolley?

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Old-timey subway.

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What's a vagabond?
Homeless guy.

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What's a homeless guy?

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Ralphie! Come on,
we got daddy-son tap class!

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Tap class!

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Hey, where is that kid?
We got a recital next week

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and his timestep is terrible,
let alone flair.

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Tap class!

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Tuh... tap class?

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Ralphie, what is
going on here?

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Bart made us read pages
from a scary diary.

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I was so a-scared, sour juice
came out my front tail.

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Bart wrote this?
This is<i> bad.</i>

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Ooh,<i> really</i> bad.

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I don't think we're
gonna make it to...

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tap class.

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Chief Wiggum?
Your son is dead...

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...inside.

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That's bad, too.

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Yeah, these are pages
from your son's diary.

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I'm afraid they very
clearly show him to be...

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a sociopath.

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Hm. Well, I've never seen Bart
write in cursive,

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so I'm a little proud of that,

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but this is the worst thing

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that's ever happened
to this family.

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I-I'm sorry, Marge.

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And... shuffle off,

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shuffle off,

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shuffle off.
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Homie, I've learned
something terrible about Bart.

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You may want to have a drink.
Way ahead of ya.

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Chief Wiggum found these pages
from our son's diary!

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Oh, I've had a long day.

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Bart might be
a sociopath.

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Socio-what?

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"Someone who
can't feel empathy or guilt.

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They do terrible things
and don't care who it hurts."

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Don't answer that!

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It could be Bart!

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Bart has a key.
What?! Who gave him a key!

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Hey, Mrs. Simpson.

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Can Bart come over
184
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and see
my grandfather's collection

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of Japanese swords
and throwing daggers?

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Aah! Why don't you play
with Lisa instead, hmm?

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<i>Konnichi-whaaa...?!</i>

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Hey, Milhouse.

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Wow,<i> this</i> is
a surprise.

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I'm usually sweating when
we talk, but not this time.

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It's amazing how you can charm
<i> and</i> disgust me at the same time.

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That's just what happens

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when I'm with the
prettiest girl in town.

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Aw...

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Ew.

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Amelia's journal tells us
197
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that her invention
is buried in the basement

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of the Springfield
Suffragette Society.

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Ah...
anyone ever tell you

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you're beautiful when
you're sleuthing?

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Milhouse, did the Hardy Boys
ever hit on Nancy Drew?

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Frank did, but Joe...

203
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let's just say there's
a mystery about<i> him.</i>

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The Suffragette Society
was right here.

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Oh... here?

206
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Hey, sweetie, you
looking for your mom?

207
00:09:04,580 --> 00:09:07,314
I'll find her-- just, uh,
give me her cup size.

208
00:09:07,350 --> 00:09:08,882
Actually, we're here
because your basement
209
00:09:08,918 --> 00:09:11,051
is home to a landmark
of feminist history.

210
00:09:11,087 --> 00:09:13,020
Do you mind
if we poke around?

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00:09:13,055 --> 00:09:14,655
The basement, eh?
Yeah, that's where

212
00:09:14,690 --> 00:09:17,524
we wash the ketchup off
the old onion rings.

213
00:09:17,560 --> 00:09:20,060
So no.
These guys want a children's menu?

214
00:09:20,096 --> 00:09:21,662
Nah, they're just leavin'.

215
00:09:21,697 --> 00:09:23,998
Seriously, kids, I got
to switch ten TV's

216
00:09:24,033 --> 00:09:27,735
over to the fourth round of
the NBA draft, so get lost.

217
00:09:27,770 --> 00:09:31,505
All right, Denver Nuggets
on the clock, people!

218
00:09:32,541 --> 00:09:33,874
Okay, I found
a test online

219
00:09:33,909 --> 00:09:35,743
that will tell us,
once and for all,

220
00:09:35,778 --> 00:09:37,678
whether Bart is a...
you know.
221
00:09:37,713 --> 00:09:38,746
Wait a minute!

222
00:09:38,781 --> 00:09:40,080
We can't just give Bart

223
00:09:40,116 --> 00:09:41,815
something labeled
"Sociopath Test"!

224
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He might look it up and set
us on fire with his mind!

225
00:09:44,787 --> 00:09:46,353
You're right!
We need Bart to think

226
00:09:46,389 --> 00:09:48,022
the test is
for something else.

227
00:09:48,057 --> 00:09:50,557
Finally! A use for
the label maker!

228
00:09:52,895 --> 00:09:56,363
One of you betrayed me, and
snitches lose their stitches.

229
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Sit on my banana!

230
00:09:58,134 --> 00:09:59,667
Why, you little...!

231
00:10:01,037 --> 00:10:03,170
Where does he get this stuff?

232
00:10:03,205 --> 00:10:05,939
Hey, son, your mom and I
just found this quiz

233
00:10:05,975 --> 00:10:07,675
you'd really love to take.
234
00:10:07,710 --> 00:10:09,276
"Are You a Jet Ski Dude

235
00:10:09,311 --> 00:10:11,211
or a Motocross Maestro?"

236
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Remember to answer the
questions honestly.

237
00:10:12,915 --> 00:10:15,582
We want to know if you meet
the clinical definition

238
00:10:15,618 --> 00:10:17,785
of "jet ski dude."

239
00:10:21,090 --> 00:10:23,691
"I enjoy manipulating
other people."

240
00:10:23,726 --> 00:10:25,559
"I believe I'm being followed."

241
00:10:25,594 --> 00:10:29,096
"Sometimes I feel as if I must
injure myself or someone else."

242
00:10:29,131 --> 00:10:30,131
Agree, agree, agree.

243
00:10:31,167 --> 00:10:32,700
Hmm.

244
00:10:32,735 --> 00:10:33,801
"Sociopath."

245
00:10:33,836 --> 00:10:34,935
What's that?

246
00:10:37,673 --> 00:10:39,239
<i>Ay, carumba!</i>

247
00:10:39,275 --> 00:10:41,241
That's what they think I am?
248
00:10:41,277 --> 00:10:44,745
Fine! I'll pretend to be the
biggest sociopath in the world!

249
00:10:44,780 --> 00:10:47,448
And I only need to change
three answers.

250
00:10:47,483 --> 00:10:48,882
Is he nuts?
I don't know.

251
00:10:48,918 --> 00:10:50,884
What do you think?
I mean, he looks nuts,

252
00:10:50,920 --> 00:10:52,786
that's for sure.

253
00:10:52,822 --> 00:10:54,788
So, here's your test.

254
00:10:54,824 --> 00:10:56,957
Call me crazy,
but I enjoyed it.

255
00:11:00,863 --> 00:11:03,831
Well, the good news
is that Bart just got

256
00:11:03,866 --> 00:11:06,266
his first 100%
ever on a test.

257
00:11:06,302 --> 00:11:08,669
Oh, my God.
What do we do?

258
00:11:08,704 --> 00:11:10,104
Whatever Bart wants.

259
00:11:11,874 --> 00:11:13,774
Crazy

260
00:11:13,809 --> 00:11:16,376
 But that's how it goes

261
00:11:18,814 --> 00:11:21,248
Millions of people

262
00:11:21,283 --> 00:11:24,118
Living as foes

263
00:11:25,821 --> 00:11:28,188
Maybe

264
00:11:28,224 --> 00:11:30,224
It's not too late

265
00:11:32,661 --> 00:11:35,662
To learn how to love

266
00:11:35,698 --> 00:11:37,965
And forget how to hate

267
00:11:40,102 --> 00:11:43,237
Mental wounds not healing

268
00:11:43,272 --> 00:11:46,473
Life's a bitter shame

269
00:11:46,509 --> 00:11:49,143
I'm going off the rails

270
00:11:49,178 --> 00:11:51,378
On a crazy train

271
00:11:53,749 --> 00:11:58,385
I'm going off the rails
on a crazy train!

272
00:12:07,563 --> 00:12:09,797
- Thanks.
- : My pleasure.

273
00:12:09,832 --> 00:12:11,865
Anything to take down
Knockers.

274
00:12:11,901 --> 00:12:14,134
I've always hated them,
because they wouldn't open up

275
00:12:14,170 --> 00:12:18,238
at 4:00 a.m. to show the World
Caber Tossing Championships.

276
00:12:18,274 --> 00:12:20,674
Okay, Willie, you can
only use the jackhammer

277
00:12:20,709 --> 00:12:22,810
when there's lots
of noise upstairs.

278
00:12:22,845 --> 00:12:24,211
No worries.

279
00:12:24,246 --> 00:12:26,046
It<i> is</i> Monday Night
Football,

280
00:12:26,081 --> 00:12:28,315
by which I mean
American football,

281
00:12:28,350 --> 00:12:30,484
by which I mean
no football at all!

282
00:12:32,421 --> 00:12:34,555
There's the box!

283
00:12:37,026 --> 00:12:39,927
Ow! Medium spicy!

284
00:12:39,962 --> 00:12:42,095
Ach! We've hit
the hot sauce supply line!

285
00:12:42,131 --> 00:12:46,900
I'll have to neutralize it
with some signature blue cheese!

286
00:12:46,936 --> 00:12:49,403
Ah...!
287
00:12:50,873 --> 00:12:53,707
Look at me! I'm a sociopath!

288
00:12:53,742 --> 00:12:55,776
Marge, it's time
we did something.

289
00:12:55,811 --> 00:12:58,445
We can take him swimming.
That makes him sleepy.

290
00:12:58,480 --> 00:13:00,881
Not good enough.
We have to call the number

291
00:13:00,916 --> 00:13:02,616
at the bottom
of the test.

292
00:13:02,651 --> 00:13:04,451
What number?

293
00:13:04,486 --> 00:13:06,119
- Right there.
- "New Beginnings"?

294
00:13:06,155 --> 00:13:09,122
We're gonna trust our son
to an 800 number?

295
00:13:09,158 --> 00:13:11,124
It's 888.

296
00:13:11,160 --> 00:13:13,126
Marge, this is
for his own good.

297
00:13:13,162 --> 00:13:14,962
He failed an online test.

298
00:13:14,997 --> 00:13:17,764
How much more
proof do you need?

299
00:13:17,800 --> 00:13:19,633
Cue-abunga!
300
00:13:23,305 --> 00:13:25,038
Surprise!
Surprise!

301
00:13:25,074 --> 00:13:27,040
Whoa, cool! But wait a minute,

302
00:13:27,076 --> 00:13:29,042
my birthday's not
for another two months.

303
00:13:29,078 --> 00:13:31,879
We know! But we wanted
to have your party now!

304
00:13:31,914 --> 00:13:35,315
They were having a
sale on piatas and...

305
00:13:35,351 --> 00:13:38,518
one thing led to another
so we, you know,

306
00:13:38,554 --> 00:13:40,320
had a thing,
mumble, mumble, mumble...

307
00:13:40,356 --> 00:13:41,421
mumble...

308
00:13:41,457 --> 00:13:42,656
Well, where are my friends?

309
00:13:42,691 --> 00:13:44,658
Well, I was gonna
mail out invites,

310
00:13:44,693 --> 00:13:48,295
but I was out of stamps and
the post office line was long,

311
00:13:48,330 --> 00:13:50,998
and I didn't
know where all the little...

312
00:13:51,033 --> 00:13:52,599
Well, more cake for me.

313
00:13:52,635 --> 00:13:54,935
No, no, no, no.
Do the Moon Bounce first.

314
00:13:54,970 --> 00:13:56,770
Yes! The Moon Bounce!

315
00:13:56,805 --> 00:14:00,007
Don't want you throwing up
this delicious cake.

316
00:14:10,920 --> 00:14:12,085
Huh.

317
00:14:12,121 --> 00:14:13,086
Eh.

318
00:14:15,925 --> 00:14:18,358
Whoa!

319
00:14:27,069 --> 00:14:29,369
Wait a minute.
What is this?

320
00:14:29,405 --> 00:14:30,537
Is it an asylum?

321
00:14:30,572 --> 00:14:32,139
No, it's a pizza parlor.

322
00:14:32,174 --> 00:14:34,541
Please tell me, Dad,
is it really a pizza parlor?

323
00:14:34,576 --> 00:14:37,544
No, son-- the pizza parlor
is where your mom and I

324
00:14:37,579 --> 00:14:40,314
are going afterwards.
Now, you're gonna be fine.

325
00:14:40,349 --> 00:14:42,716
I wouldn't be surprised if you
were the least messed-up kid

326
00:14:42,751 --> 00:14:44,718
in the whole joint.
We love you!

327
00:14:46,755 --> 00:14:49,389
Wait, wait, wait! I didn't
even get to say good-bye.

328
00:14:49,425 --> 00:14:52,726
Good-bye!
I'll<i> never</i> forgive you!

329
00:14:52,761 --> 00:14:53,761
There. You happy?

330
00:14:57,452 --> 00:14:59,752
Let me out!
I was just playing a joke!

331
00:14:59,788 --> 00:15:02,989
A cruel joke on the people that
love me! That I don't regret!

332
00:15:03,024 --> 00:15:04,490
That doesn't make me
a sociopath!

333
00:15:04,526 --> 00:15:06,492
Children,

334
00:15:06,528 --> 00:15:08,761
form a line
in order of medication

335
00:15:08,797 --> 00:15:10,930
from Adderall to Zoloft.

336
00:15:14,469 --> 00:15:16,669
You have been brought here
for a purpose.

337
00:15:16,705 --> 00:15:17,670
You are fearless,
338
00:15:17,706 --> 00:15:19,105
and no one can stop you.

339
00:15:19,140 --> 00:15:20,940
Which means you'll be
of great use...

340
00:15:20,976 --> 00:15:23,176
To the U.S. military.

341
00:15:24,512 --> 00:15:26,145
I expected more
of a reaction.

342
00:15:26,181 --> 00:15:28,414
I waited outside
the door and everything.

343
00:15:28,450 --> 00:15:30,984
They don't react.
That's what we want.

344
00:15:31,019 --> 00:15:32,685
Right.

345
00:15:32,721 --> 00:15:35,288
We'll be using you
in the ultimate video game

346
00:15:35,323 --> 00:15:38,791
to test these U.S. Air Force
drone simulators.

347
00:15:40,061 --> 00:15:41,527
Man, that is
a tough crowd.

348
00:15:41,563 --> 00:15:42,829
Oh!

349
00:15:44,232 --> 00:15:47,200
Mom, Dad, I've discovered
the most amazing thing!

350
00:15:47,235 --> 00:15:49,636
I can't wait...
Um, where's Bart?

351
00:15:49,671 --> 00:15:52,372
He's safe.
And more importantly, we're safe.

352
00:15:53,842 --> 00:15:56,242
I miss him so much.

353
00:15:58,413 --> 00:16:00,313
Oh. Can I call him?

354
00:16:00,348 --> 00:16:02,515
You can call his guard, Tico.

355
00:16:02,550 --> 00:16:03,716
He picks up sometimes.

356
00:16:03,752 --> 00:16:05,018
I see.

357
00:16:05,053 --> 00:16:06,986
Okay, I'll do that.

358
00:16:07,022 --> 00:16:08,821
Homie, where
did we go wrong?

359
00:16:08,857 --> 00:16:11,224
I don't know, sweetie.
I don't know.

360
00:16:11,259 --> 00:16:15,495
We did everything we could for
him during the commercials.

361
00:16:15,530 --> 00:16:17,230
And we're live

362
00:16:17,265 --> 00:16:18,564
as Lisa Simpson prepares
to prove

363
00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:20,166
that Springfield embarrassment
364
00:16:20,201 --> 00:16:22,168
Amelia Vanderbuckle
deserves to be

365
00:16:22,203 --> 00:16:24,237
in the female scientific
pantheon,

366
00:16:24,272 --> 00:16:26,506
along with Marie Curie and, uh,

367
00:16:26,541 --> 00:16:28,508
you know, uh, um,

368
00:16:28,543 --> 00:16:31,077
Velma from<i> Scooby-Doo.</i>

369
00:16:31,112 --> 00:16:32,912
Thank you all for coming out

370
00:16:32,948 --> 00:16:36,575
to support a woman's place
in history!

371
00:16:36,576 --> 00:16:37,817
That's what this is?

372
00:16:37,841 --> 00:16:39,841
I thought it was a
Green Bay Packers rally.

373
00:16:39,888 --> 00:16:42,255
All right, you know what,
this ain't coming off.

374
00:16:42,290 --> 00:16:46,326
Behold, the masterpiece
of Amelia Vanderbuckle.

375
00:16:48,396 --> 00:16:49,696
A loom?!

376
00:16:49,731 --> 00:16:50,697
That isn't science.

377
00:16:50,732 --> 00:16:52,365
That's home economics.

378
00:16:52,400 --> 00:16:54,367
Everyone, storm the stage!

379
00:16:54,402 --> 00:16:56,336
Not so fast!

380
00:16:56,371 --> 00:16:58,037
This is no ordinary loom!

381
00:16:58,073 --> 00:16:59,872
Even an extraordinary loom

382
00:16:59,908 --> 00:17:02,408
is the most boring thing
I could think of.

383
00:17:02,444 --> 00:17:06,079
This is much, much more
than just a loom.

384
00:17:22,063 --> 00:17:24,197
It's alive!
And polite!

385
00:17:24,232 --> 00:17:29,502
"Operand"? Looks like it wants
us to give it a math problem.

386
00:17:37,779 --> 00:17:40,079
Oh, my God. Oh, God!

387
00:17:40,115 --> 00:17:42,648
It's the first
computational device!

388
00:17:42,684 --> 00:17:44,450
People, people,
don't you see?

389
00:17:44,486 --> 00:17:46,052
The board acts
like punch cards

390
00:17:46,087 --> 00:17:47,954
and the loom
like a computer,

391
00:17:47,989 --> 00:17:51,391
with the Charles Babbage
and the John Von Neumann...

392
00:17:51,426 --> 00:17:54,827
Let's have the square root
of nine cheers for Lisa!

393
00:17:57,832 --> 00:18:01,501
Lisa! Lisa! Lisa!

394
00:18:02,670 --> 00:18:05,438
You see that, Bart?
You see what your sister did?

395
00:18:05,473 --> 00:18:06,473
Yeah, yeah, great.

396
00:18:06,508 --> 00:18:08,441
Listen, I'm in a simulator,

397
00:18:08,476 --> 00:18:09,876
so I can't really talk.

398
00:18:09,911 --> 00:18:11,778
And you know I'm a sociopath,

399
00:18:11,813 --> 00:18:13,513
so I'm just going through
the motions here.

400
00:18:13,548 --> 00:18:14,680
I love you.

401
00:18:14,716 --> 00:18:16,115
I was just saying that
to myself.

402
00:18:17,886 --> 00:18:20,520
Kaboom! Blam-blam-blam!

403
00:18:20,555 --> 00:18:21,554
Have a smart bomb, stupid.

404
00:18:22,690 --> 00:18:24,357
Nice<i> not</i> knowin' ya.

405
00:18:24,392 --> 00:18:25,725
All targets destroyed.

406
00:18:25,760 --> 00:18:27,293
Simulation complete.

407
00:18:29,330 --> 00:18:31,464
You are impressive.

408
00:18:31,499 --> 00:18:33,633
Even though I'm the only
real person in the world,

409
00:18:33,668 --> 00:18:36,035
and, therefore, I created you
in my imagination.

410
00:18:36,071 --> 00:18:38,871
Children, your empty souls
and flying fingers

411
00:18:38,907 --> 00:18:41,641
are very impressive,
and I can tell you now

412
00:18:41,676 --> 00:18:44,210
that was no simulation.

413
00:18:44,245 --> 00:18:46,979
You mean
we were blowing up real stuff?

414
00:18:47,015 --> 00:18:49,816
That's right-- convoys,
terrorist training camps,

415
00:18:49,851 --> 00:18:52,618
suspicious weddings,
Kabul Starbucks.

416
00:18:52,654 --> 00:18:54,287
Cool!
Awesome. - I knew it!

417
00:18:54,322 --> 00:18:56,522
No, I thought
it was a video game.

418
00:18:56,558 --> 00:18:58,524
I don't want
to hurt real people.

419
00:18:58,560 --> 00:19:00,726
Oh, I want to go home.

420
00:19:00,762 --> 00:19:02,228
Please?

421
00:19:02,263 --> 00:19:03,663
How disappointing.

422
00:19:03,698 --> 00:19:06,833
Does anyone else share
the human boy's feelings?

423
00:19:06,868 --> 00:19:09,836
Son, the truth is
the simulators we told you

424
00:19:09,871 --> 00:19:13,172
<i>weren't</i> simulators
<i>were</i> simulators.

425
00:19:14,109 --> 00:19:15,341
Now, I'm sorry, Bart,

426
00:19:15,376 --> 00:19:17,743
but you are a healthy,
normal boy.

427
00:19:17,779 --> 00:19:19,378
We're sending you home.

428
00:19:19,414 --> 00:19:22,048
Really? Oh, wow.
Dudes, it's been real.

429
00:19:22,083 --> 00:19:23,883
Although, actually,
it was all a fake.

430
00:19:23,918 --> 00:19:26,052
I'll never forget you,
Bart Simpson.

431
00:19:26,087 --> 00:19:28,054
742 Evergreen Terrace.

432
00:19:28,089 --> 00:19:30,256
Dog door in the back
that has no lock.

433
00:19:33,461 --> 00:19:35,761
My little guy is back!

434
00:19:35,797 --> 00:19:39,198
And I'm not bad!
I just made bad decisions.

435
00:19:39,234 --> 00:19:41,033
It's okay, boy.

436
00:19:41,069 --> 00:19:44,103
You started out life
as a bad decision.

437
00:19:44,139 --> 00:19:47,273
The best bad decision
I ever made.

438
00:19:49,644 --> 00:19:52,612
And I restored
the reputation

439
00:19:52,647 --> 00:19:55,281
of a scientist
from 100 years ago.

440
00:19:57,418 --> 00:20:01,053
And Maggie tried
strawberries for the first time.

441
00:20:01,089 --> 00:20:04,790
What a day!
What a day!

442
00:20:09,918 --> 00:20:11,784
Okay, Lisa, go
ahead and say it.

443
00:20:11,821 --> 00:20:13,220
Don't be ashamed.

444
00:20:13,255 --> 00:20:14,888
I'm immortal!

445
00:20:14,924 --> 00:20:17,091
...immortal!

446
00:20:17,126 --> 00:20:20,094
Hey, Madam Docent,
want to come see?

447
00:20:20,129 --> 00:20:22,496
Oh, I'd love to, but
there's a huge crowd here

448
00:20:22,531 --> 00:20:24,331
at the Science
of Thor exhibit.

449
00:20:24,366 --> 00:20:28,335
Hey, tour! Want to see a great
invention and its plaque?

450
00:20:28,370 --> 00:20:30,337
We're just passing through
to the cafe.

451
00:20:30,372 --> 00:20:31,505
Double-time, tour.

452
00:20:33,509 --> 00:20:34,575
How 'bout you, sir?

453
00:20:34,609 --> 00:20:36,309
<i>Je Ne parle pas l'Anglais.</i>

454
00:20:36,344 --> 00:20:38,311
<i>Pas de problme.</i>
<i>Je parle franais!</i>

455
00:20:38,347 --> 00:20:41,348
Uh, leave me alone,
little girl!

456
00:20:41,383 --> 00:20:43,103
== sync, corrected by <font color=#00FF00>elderman</font> ==
<font color=#00FFFF>@elder_man</font>

457
00:20:46,722 --> 00:20:51,625
Okay, pal, if you are
indeed a personal computer...

458
00:20:55,564 --> 00:20:57,297
Oh, baby. Spin that yarn.

459
00:20:57,333 --> 00:20:59,700
Now, that is a loom with a view.

460
00:20:59,735 --> 00:21:02,336
Homie! Come help
me carry the groceries!

461
00:21:02,371 --> 00:21:03,771
Yeah!

462
00:21:03,806 --> 00:21:05,773
Clear history, clear history.

463
00:21:05,808 --> 00:21:08,442
Just working
on your anniversary present.

464
00:21:09,311 --> 00:21:10,878
I know this looks like nothing,

465
00:21:10,913 --> 00:21:13,180
but it's actually bad.

466
00:21:13,215 --> 00:21:15,249

467
00:21:26,992 --> 00:21:28,992
Shh!