Version: 1

Client Name: Manish Target School: Chicago

Essay Question:

Why are you seeking an MBA? What are your plans and goals after you receive your degree?
Essay Type: Future Goals
Actual Word Count: 462 Target Word Count: 500

First Submission of Essay with Editors Comments:

My main goals behind receiving an MBA at this point in my life are two-fold. I would like to further my business
education, and also pursue other areas of finance. I have come to this conclusion after many years of
introspection and realizations about where my career is, and where I would like it to be [Comment 1].

I received my degree in Business Management with a concentration of Finance at Delaware State College in
the undergraduate business program, which had just formed two years before I joined. Due to the newness of
the program, there were not many classes set up specifically for undergraduate business students. We were
thus all placed in graduate level classes along with the MBA students in Delaware State's business school.
This experience proved to be the most exciting and, at the same time, the most intimidating one in my life
[Comment 2]. While the opportunity to work with MBA students created the spark that led to my deep interest
in the business world and finance specifically [Comment 3], I also realized how much I had to learn. It was for
this reason that I decided I needed to acquire a good basis of understanding in finance once I graduated from
college [Comment 4].

I reasoned that the best way to truly learn and understand finance was to start as an accountant and get a
good grounding in the basics of the income statement and its components [Comment 5]. This led to my first
job as a Staff Accountant at Bob Chinn's, Inc., a restaurant operator in Chicago. After two solid years of
accounting, I realized that I wanted to learn more about the analysis [Comment 6] behind the statement, as
well as the workings of planning and forecasting [Comment 7]. This led me to my current job as a financial
analyst at A.T. & Love Corp [Comment 8] . I have now reached another point of awareness in my life, and I
want to expand my knowledge of business in general, and finance in particular [Comment 9].

My first goal is to get a better grounding in Marketing, Strategy, Operations, and General Management
[Comment 10]. I feel that learning about these other areas of business will help make me a well-rounded
manager [Comment 11], who understands completely all of the inner workings of a company. I know that
receiving an MBA will help me acquire the skills to become the type of manager I desire to be [Comment 12].

My second reason for going to business school is to learn more about other areas of finance. I have only had
experience with the accounting and analysis procedures of a business, and I would enjoy the challenge of
exploring other areas of finance [Comment 13], such as investment banking. I intend to further pursue this
interest after getting my MBA. My ultimate goal, however, is to eventually become the CFO of a large
company.

Content:
You answer the question by offering a great description of your background and what you have done to date
(i.e., business undergrad, accounting). You also clearly state your short-term and long-term career goals.

You could more adequately answer the question by being more specific youre your responses. In general, the
admissions committee would get a better sense of who you are by explaining why you have set these career
goals for yourself and how business school will prepare you for those positions. You should also consider
giving more explanation about how your experiences (in undergrad and at work) have guided your career
choices so far and why you have been heading in this direction.

Specifically, you should answer these questions in your essay:

Why you want to enter investment banking in the short term?

Why aim to be a CFO in the long term? How will investment banking prepare you for that role?

What skills do you need to obtain from business school in order to achieve these goals?

How do you plan to make a broader impact after school?

You refer to getting an MBA to become the manager that you want to be. You should consider explaining
what exactly that means (a team-oriented leader, a visionary).

Lastly, you might consider offering more concrete skills that you are looking to get at business school. General
marketing, operations, etc. are very generic; many applicants will have that. You can differentiate yourself and
show that you truly understand yourself and you career goals by stating the specific business problems that
you want to study (i.e., new product development aspect of marketing, etc).

See Reflection on Target School and Reflection on Background for additional comments.

Content Rating: 3 (out of 5)

Parameters / Structure:

Under word limit.

Structure is as follows: Reasons for MBA, Background, Goals for MBA Education, Career Goals.

You should consider first addressing your career goals so that the admissions committee will understand why
you want to get a deeper understanding of finance. Then you can describe your background and give an
appraisal of your current skills. You can finish with how an MBA would fill in the gaps and help you reach your
goals.

Parameters / Structure Rating: 3 (out of 5)

Grammar:

Excellent! No noticeable errors. Very succinct and easy to read.

Grammar Rating: 5 (out of 5)

Use of Situation, Action, Result format (if applicable):

SAR might not be wholly applicable to this question since it is not asking for a specific experience. You might
consider using this structure when describing your undergraduate experience and how that shaped your
career decisions.

Reflection on Target School:

You do not specifically address your fit for Chicago, but the question does not ask this. If the other essays for
the school do not ask why you want to attend the school, then I would encourage you to address that in this
essay. Fit is a very important aspect of admissions and it is necessary to demonstrate it, even if they do not
ask it.

Questions you should address are:

Why is Chicago your top choice? You mention that you are very interested in finance and have
decided to apply to schools that are very finance-focused. You should talk about specific aspects of
the program (i.e., finance faculty and alumni, finance curriculum) that are not available elsewhere.
For example, for Chicago, are you attracted to the school s large number of Nobel Laureates?
What can you give to the program at Chicago? How are you different than the other candidates in a
way that will allow you to have a lasting impact on your peers and the program?

What about you would make you fit in to the culture at Chicago? For example, do you enjoy working
in teams and find the collaborative environment at the school attractive?

Your essay would more likely stand out to the admissions committee if you indicated how you would get the
skills you aim to get at business school (i.e., clubs? Coursework? Case competitions?).

Reflection on Background::

As mentioned before, you should consider giving more detailed explanations when you describe how your
background has shaped your career decisions. This will help the admissions committee understand why you
have followed the path you have so far and how business school fits in.

Specifically, you should address:

What did you like about your business undergraduate experience that inspired your interest in the
business world?
Why did you want to learn more about statement analysis? To deepen financial knowledge?

What have you done at A.T. & Love Corp.?

What made you realize that you want to expand your general business knowledge? Why do you also
want to go deeper into Finance?

Rating Descriptions

Category Rating Description

The essay adequately answers all elements of the essay and
4-5
Content utilizes a fitting experience / example for the question at hand.
3 The essay does not completely address the essay and / or the
experience / example used is not compelling.
 The essay fails to adequately answer a critical portion of the
essay and does not use a fitting experience / example for the
1-2
question at hand.

The essay has minimal grammar flaws, including syntax,

4-5
sentence structure and use of idioms.
The essay exhibits grammar flaws that should be addressed, but
3
Grammar do not affect readability.
The essay exhibits grammar flaws that detract from the essay
1-2
and do affect readability.

The essay flows well, is concise and meets the word limit
4-5
criterion.
The essay surpasses the word limit by a noticeable margin and
3
Structure the essay would benefit from structural improvement.
The essay is difficult to follow and the main points of the essay
1-2
are difficult to extract.

It is always so hard to give the exact number of people who have majored in accounting,
but one thing that I know is that the demography is very wide and large. This is because
they have different reasons for majoring in this career path. The most common reason to
all people is because accounting is a marketable career and they merely want to find a
job. The number of people majoring in this field is growing immensely and the most
important thing is to consider the main reason of joining this profession. Some people
will claim that when they were in high school, this was their best subject and they loved it
and so they will need to major in it. I believe the best reason for majoring in accounting is
because it has wide varieties of career path that one can major in. People should
understand that this field is not all about debits and credits. It is more of a communicating
language in the world of business and this is why many chief executive officers hold a
degree in this field. In the day today life it is usually one of the most common
undergraduate degree programs. The most important thing is to make certain that all of
the people who are in this profession understand business and that is why many people
who have ventured in accounting always have considerations for such posts. The most
interesting part of this career choice is that most of the time the people who venture into
it will always have the best job positions waiting for them because many people always
have a notion that it is a difficult discipline. The employment opportunities are abounding
for the graduates majoring in accounting. The government figures shows that at least 1.2
million of jobs are held by accountants every year. According to the Feldmann, 2009 and
also the survey done by the Institute of Certified Public Accountants (AICPA, 2000) the
graduates are declining but after revisiting their research in the year 2005, it reflected an
increase in number of the accountant graduates. This has become a relief to many
accounting recruiters. According to the 2007 Employment dynamics and growth
expectations (EDGE) 57% of the hiring managers have a difficulty when hiring qualified
staff. This call for a necessity of accounting graduates, which fortunately is increasing
day after the other as the business enterprises increase.
After attaining a degree in this sector, most of the students always opt to become public
accountants as the first career choice. The choice of either taking job as a private
accountant depended on the fact that they had to make choices among the salary values
offered to them. None of them like to work in the non profit organizations. They also
venture to work in a CPA company because this will give them an opportunity to venture
in areas that they want to experience especially in the write up sector and auditing. This
will offer them the necessary experience and that is one of the things that have
invigorated so many students in venturing in the public sector option. One may also opt
to venture in the private sector which is immensely lucrative. Some of the student will
always like to work for the company which is rising up in this sector, but this will be
determined by the level of research one is willing to do. This will give them a chance to
grow and nurture their career paths in different sectors. I would advise the graduates to
incline towards the public sector especially the government and non profitable sector
which will provide them with the best job security even if the salary is low.
There are several things that an accountant can do after they have completed their
undergraduate degree. One can choose to specialize in different areas of this field, but
most of all have the kind of skills that can enable them in doing so. One of the areas that
is very common for people who have done accounting. Auditing is one of the areas that
one can venture in. It is one of the basic areas that people have chosen to build their
careers in. This kind of job involves checking of ledgers and financial statements for an
organization so as to determine if they are making losses and are they spending the cash
that has been allocated to them accordingly. In the era that we are in today, the work of
this nature has been automated and mostly they just need to key in the values accordingly
and they are going to get the right kind of statement. They ensure that the values that are
presented are for the financial year contains the right values.
Accounting career paths are very varied and this is why many a times one has to consider
the path that they want take. Many people after they have cleared school do not have an
impression where to flinch their careers but the many options have in these career paths
that can be taken. Book keeping is another thing that they can do. These are the people
who keep records of invoices, payments and other revenue coming for a company or an
individual. In many cases they will always want to venture in this area accordingly.
Another area, which they would venture in is becoming general accountants. This is
almost the same to a book keeper, but they make accruals and the necessary adjustments
in the accounting records. In the large organizations, they are usually placed in
departments like human resources department dealing with the payment of the staff.
Another area is when one becomes a controller. These are the people who are responsible
for the accounting department. They usually work in the public sector but also venture in
the private sector and they are usually in charge of cash flow for the organization. For one
to reach to such a position, one must work and put a lot of determination in the work that
they do. The other job, which is available for them is becoming a forensic accountant.
These are the people who work with the government or the persons who are accountable
for auditing and investigating crimes which are related to accounting frauds and other
related things. These people should ensure that they posses some level of law knowledge
because this will assist them in identifying areas which have been altered and assist in
prosecution of the culprits.
A budget analyst is another thing that they can do. This is because they are able to
interpret many things, which are recorded in the budget. This is a very crucial and
involving work because they are the people who are responsible in the making of
financial plans for businesses and other organizations especially the government agencies
and other non profitable organizations. The professionals who have taken up these works
can take up these jobs in both the private and the public sectors. The people who take
these kinds of jobs should be very innovative when it comes to the negotiation process
and that is why they should have good personal and interpersonal skills.
Financial accounting is another sector that one can venture in. These are the persons who
are accountable for the preparation of financial statements of the available businesses or
any enterprise. These are the persons who are used to make decisions when there is a
merger which is going to take place in any company. This is because these people Are
gifted to study the fiscal statements of the two companies and determine if there is a need
for merger and if one of the companies is taking advantage of the other or not. They are
also responsible for forecasting to determine the returns that will be experienced by the
companies when they merge. It is important to make sure that these people are
responsible for the financial and accounting processes. Management accounting is a very
busy position in any organization. This is why many people are able to have the kind of
decisions that are deterministic in the process of capital budgeting and the area of
analysis of contracts. Control on businesses on the expenses and the cost analysis is done
by these people. They usually make sure that they work in close contact with the people
responsible for the marketing sector since they assist in a big way when it comes to the
making decisions which are good for the welfare of the company.
Taxation is another area which they can take up. This is for persons who would like to
become tax accountants. These are the people who work for both companies and
individuals. They usually prepare statements which either for a corporation of personal
income. It is a boost for the individual who is doing this kind of work to have good
knowledge background of the necessary kind of economics which is being used by these
people. Accountants are also responsible for advising individuals when it comes to
venturing in different kinds of businesses. This is because they are the people who have
the knowhow on the issues that are present and current in the business world. It is very
good to ensure that the people who need services can be given independent and privately.
Budgeting and other issues, which are associated with the business are given and offered
to the people accordingly. This is very usual for the companies which need a lot of
desecrate business especially those that are being faces with of competition. They need
individuals who are trustworthy and can be able to keep a secret and the customers
information private. Some individuals have also opted to continue with their studies even
after becoming qualified accountants. They continue for MS to become licensed,
Certified Public Accountants. This is a person who is approved by the state to finance
financial information in the public companies to give accurate results. These are the
individuals qualified to start their own auditing firms if they do not a favouring or well
paying job opportunity (Felix 2010, 56). Thus the study found it advisable for the
accountant graduates to continue to this level for better and higher chances of
employment opportunities and also private or self employment enterprises.
The study realized various career choices coincide with the accountant career path.
Though the rate of accountant graduate seems to increase year after the other, the job
opportunities are also increasing since many people are venturing to businesses which
requires accountants to deal with the financial analysis. Each and every sector starting
with the individual enterprises, the public, private and nongovernmental organizations
cannot be successful without the accountants. These are important personnel since every
business is after making profits and thus accounting careers like the auditing department
are important to examine whether the business profitable or not. The private and public
sectors also requires accountant staffs that are qualified to analyze their financial status
and thus, realizing on the areas that needs improvement. Some students lack the
opportunity of joining any of the discussed careers especially because of some issues like
corruption and high competition. Nevertheless such students are not supposed to be
frustrated but to come up with other activities that utilize their qualifications. A number
of graduates who have lacked a position in the public, private, or the non profit
organizations have started their own auditing firms. They run their own business as
private auditors and are employed casually by these organizations. Other graduates have
set their small microfinance businesses. These are industries which are growing at a high
rate. For the qualified accountants their operations are easy and beneficial. These
enterprises have become common in the rural areas and in areas with small scale
business. Some of the accountants are joining hands to operate such businesses as
partners. Some of these enterprises have grown to become Saccos and eventually banks.
continue for MS to become licensed, Certified Public Accountants. This is an individual
who is licensed by the state to finance financial information in the public companies to
give accurate results. These are the individuals qualified to start their own auditing firms
if they do not a favouring or well paying job opportunity (Felix 2010, 56). Thus the study
found it advisable for the accountant graduates to continue to this level for better and
higher chances of employment opportunities and also private or self employment
enterprises. For people who have advanced in these areas and actually had the best
payment package compared to having a degree alone. This is why I would advice many
people to make sure that they have taken the issue of taking CPA in an extra way to be
able to make more money and have better jobs. Many people who have licences and
certifications are able to have the best things in the career paths toward getting the best
jobs possible.
Every qualified accountant expects a salary that is higher than for any other
undergraduate from a number of business schools. There is also an expectation of
initiation into an exclusive professional club of the practicing accountants. This is a
symbolic status that makes one feel to have an important and recognized rank in the
society. Unfortunately these expectations are rarely met in the current society. Quite a
number of students have joined the account career. This is making this field to have more
than the required participants. In other words the supply is overtaking the demand. With
high expectations of having a unique status, what happens when one fails to achieve this
goal? One is also interested with the queries like where an accountant career path can
lead one to or if there are there other industrial areas related to accountant career that
such a graduate could get involved to utilize his knowledge.
For students who are clearing from the universities i would advise that one who is trying
to learn about a good accounting career path should have a wide variety of choices
especially if he has a degree in accounting. Ones initial selection depends on the feeling
about a primary direction that he believes is of interest to him. There are various general
areas where one can choose to work in for instance private, public, government linked, or
the non profit making organizations. For newer graduates, it is advisable to work with a
CPA firm since it gives an opportunity to examine a number of industries and experience
of both the audit and write up functions.
One may also decide to join a private sector which is more beneficial, nevertheless it is
advisable to first investigate on any industry that lies as a choice and go for the one that is
fast growing. This gives an opportunity for expansion of ones career and thus wider
rooms for advancement. Where one is inclined in a public service or a career in a
government or non profit making organizations, one gets a good chance of exploring in
various issues and can easily make changes which are beneficial to a the whole society or
even the nation. All the government offices, in all departments, require accountant
personnel that are talented. These offices include the FDIC, IRS, Comptroller of the
currency, General services administration, military branches departments, health
ministries, environmental ministries, to mention but a few. Any accounting working area,
be it in government, public, or private sectors, will always lead to an interesting financial
rewarding and beneficial careers. Though some of these careers overlap they vary in
focus and lead to a challenging, professional life.
In conclusion I would say that Accounting is a career that moulds accountants; these are
persons that are responsible in the provision of data that is mainly required to make an
assessment on the future and current economic activities. Accountants performs various
duties, which include planning tax strategy, calculating the computing cost, preparation of
financial statements, developing information technology, measuring financial
performance, to mention but a few. This suggests that there are various and different
accounting career paths which are beneficial in one way or another and can fit different
people. Though some of them overlap, each of them has a specific focus. For successful
career people should be able to do the best that they can do to advance this sector. Many
technological advances have been made to ensure that these people who take up this
course are able to save time and actually do their work better too