Process being held out in Indian marriages

The first and the foremost step is the selection of the boy (dulha) and girl
(dulhan). In arranged marriages in the Hindu custom, the parents select the
prospective bride/groom (dulha/dulhan) for their son/daughter. After the
selection procedure is over, the family members of both the girl and boy
ask the priest to suggest an auspicious date for the engagement of the two
also known as misri or ring ceremony.

The pre wedding ceremonies that are being followed during the marriage.

Engagement (Sagai)
In the engagement ceremony, the to-be bride and the groom exchange
wedding rings among each other. Sweets and garlands are also exchanged
among the couple. In this reception only there will be an arrangement of
small DJ party or just dancing on the dhol or on the stage as well as
arrangement of eating. In some weddings they distribute items also after
the ring ceremony is over so as to follow the culture.

Mehndi lagwana (putting of Mehendi)

After the festive spirit of engagement, the next important ritual is the
Mehndi party. It is believed that the color of Mehndi signifies the essence of
love in a marriage, so it is put on bride's hand to strengthen that bond of
love. The bride's family and friends mainly celebrate this ceremony. The
female friends and family members of the bride rejoice and celebrate this
occasion, as henna gets painted on her hands and feet. Apart from the
bride, the family members also get their hands painted with henna. Singing
traditional songs and dancing to the beat of music
forms a major part of this ritual.
Sangeet party:
Among the other important rituals is the Sangeet party, wherein all the
family members and friends of the bride and groom celebrate, by singing
and dancing the night away. Along with song and dance there are
arrangements for food and drink. Ghari puja is also another important
religious ceremony, which is performed on the eve of the wedding day at
the groom and bride's place separately.

On the morning of the wedding day, Pithi or Haldi, the cleansing ceremony
is practiced during which the bride and bridegroom are pasted with turmeric
powder in their respective homes, as a part of their beautification process.

After that tilak ceremony is being taking place, in which tilak is put on the
forehead using Kumkum, a red turmeric powder. The male members of the
bride's family, like her father, brother, uncles place a tilak on the
forehead of the groom.

Mayra (chak baht)

The Mayra is an important ceremony, common to both the bride's and
the groom's families. This ceremony is performed by the maternal uncle
of the groom/bride, who, along with his wife and family, arrives with
much fanfare, and is received by the bride/groom's mother with the
traditional welcome.Mayara arrange by relative of mother's family,
mostly brother(s) of mom.

Now the actual wedding ceremony takes place in which several rituals
are being practiced out they are:

Barat nikasi:
A wedding procession with the bridegroom on a horse, Pushkar, The
groom leaves for the wedding venue riding a decorated horse or
elephant. This is a very colorful and grand ceremony. The groom is
dressed in a sherwani (long jacket) and churidars (fitted trousers). On
his head he wears a sehra (turban).

Before he departs, his relatives apply the ceremonial tilak on his

forehead and his sister feeds the horse or elephant sweetened grain.
The baraat (consisting of the groom seated on the horse or elephant,
and relatives and friends of the groom) is headed by the dancing of the
congregated folks.

Upon arriving at the venue of the wedding, the groom is welcomed by a

welcome song called talota. Then the groom knocks on the door with

his sword and enters.

Var mala/jay mala process:

In most Hindu weddings, the groom is led to a small stage, known as
mandap, where he is greeted by the bride's family. The maternal uncle,
brother or brides' best friends bring the bride to the stage. The bride
and the groom are handed the garlands while the priest is chanting the
religious hymns. Following this, the groom and bride exchange
garlands, which are the var mala or jai mala, signifying their acceptance
of each other as husband and wife. Then, the groom's mother-in-law
measures the groom's chest, and pokes and prods him to make sure he
is tough enough to defend her daughter. She then puts kajal on the
groom to ward off evil spirits. Before the exchange of the Var malas the
bride and groom stand opposite to each other separated by a long
piece of cloth known as antarpat. The mangalashtakas are recited and
then the antarpat is removed and the bride and groom garland each
other. This is the most auspicious and important ceremony and takes
place on a muhurt (auspicious timing) decided by the Vedic calendar
known as Panchang.

Aarti:
The baraatis (groom's party) are received by the bride's family and at
the entrance to the wedding venue. The bride's mother welcomes the
groom by performing the aarti (traditional Indian welcome ritual with a
lamp or diya placed on a platter or thali) to welcome her son-in-law and
places a tilak on his forehead

Baasi jawari:
This event takes place the day of the wedding. The bride's sisters hide
the groom's shoes and ask for money if he (groom) wants them back
and be able to go home with the bride.

Kanya dan:
Kanya Daan, which means the giving away of one's daughter, has been
derived from the Sanskrit words Kanya which means virgin girl and
Daan which means donation. Kanya Dan is a very significant ritual
performed by the father of the bride in presence of a large gathering that
is invited to witness the wedding. The father pours out libation of sacred
water symbolizing the giving away of his daughter to the bride groom.
The groom recites Vedic hymns to Kama, the god of love, for pure love
and blessings. The bride's sisters then steal the groom's shoes and ask for
money for their return. This is a sign of the groom's loyalty.
As a condition for offering his daughter for marriage, the father of the
bride requests a promise from the groom for assisting the bride in
realizing the three ends:
dharma,
artha,
And kama.
The groom makes the promise by repeating three times that he will not
fail the bride in realizing dharma, artha and Kama.
Ideally, the parents of the bride place the right hand of the bride over the
right hand of the groom and place their own left hands at the bottom and
the right hands (the two of them) on top, securing the Conch with gold,
betel nut, flowers and a little fruit (in it) placed in bride's hand. It is at
this point that the purpose of the Kanyadaan is clearly stated per
scripture and the names of the parents and forefathers are stated from
both sides. The wedding cannot legally proceed without this Kanyadaan
step in which parents of the bride agree to the wedding.
In a Hindu wedding, the bride and groom marry each other and the priest
only assists with the Mantra. He cannot declare them married as no
authority is vested in him to do so. Agni, gods and the invited members
of the family and friends are the witness. This ritual reveals that Wife is
the form (avatar) and source of Purushardhas like Dharma, Artha, Kama
and Moksha. This ritual also helps the bridegroom to think that his wife
is the most valuable gift given by God himself, and helps the bride to
think that her husband is a form of god himself. However widows and
divorced women are not eligible for Kanya Dan ritual.

Panigrahana hathlewa:
After being led to the wedding mandap, the bride and groom have their
hands tied together. The priest does a puja to Lord Ganesh and then
puts a coin & Mehndi on the bride's right hand where the round empty
spot is (where no Mehndi was put) and ties his hand with the brides.
This puja is done schedule in advance based on an auspicious time &

date.

Ghathbandhan:
In this ritual priest tying a knot using the ends of the clothing worn by
the bride and groom. The priest ties the end of the groom's dhoti or
kurta, whichever he is wearing, with that of the bride's saree; the knot
signifies the sacred wedlock.

Saptapdi:
In this ceremony the bride and the groom follows the invocations from
the priest, the bride and the groom will participate in a ceremony called
as saat phere.This is the ceremony where the couple take their vows
(saat janmo ki kasam).They are:

1. The bride and the groom take the first step of the seven vows to
pledge that they would provide a prospered living for the household or
the family that they would look after and avoid those that might hinder
their healthy living.

2. During the second step of the seven phera, the bride and the groom
promise that they would develop their physical, mental and spiritual
powers in order to lead a lifestyle that would be healthy.

3. During the third vow, the couple promises to earn a living and
increase by righteous and proper means, so that their materialistic
wealth increases manifold.

4. While taking the fourth vow, the married couple pledges to acquire
knowledge, happiness and harmony by mutual love, respect,
understanding and faith.

5. The fifth vow is taken to have expanded their heredity by having

children, for whom, they will be responsible. They also pray to be
blessed with healthy, honest and brave children.

6. While taking the sixth step around the sacred fire, the bride and the
groom pray for self-control of the mind, body and soul and longevity of
their marital relationship.

7. When the bride and the groom take the seventh and the last vow,
they promise that they would be true and loyal to each other and
would remain companions and best of friends for the lifetime.
Vidaai:
Also called rukhsati in North India. This is considered to be the most
emotional ritual, when the bride leaves her parents' home and makes
her way to her husband's. Family and friends, who also shower her with
blessings and gifts, give her a tearful farewell. The male members of the
bride's family bid farewell to the groom by applying the traditional tilak
(vermilion) to his forehead and showering him with gifts.

At their new home (brides sasural)

Darshan
After Vidaai, the couple first visits a temple, preferably that of
Lord Rama and Sita, to seek their blessing from where they
move towards the groom's house.
Dwar-Rokai
After leaving the groom's father-in-law's house, the couple comes
home. They are stopped at the entrance of the house by either the
groom's sister or his father's sister. There, in an earthen vessel, the
sister/aunt uses a mixture of salt and water to ward off evil spirits from
the groom. After this, the pot is thrown on the ground and destroyed.
The couple then enters the house.
GrahaPravesh
When the bride arrives at her new home, her mother-in-law welcomes
her with the traditional Aarti. At the entrance, she puts her right foot
onto a tray of Kumkum powder mixed in water or milk, symbolizing the
arrival of good fortune and purity. With both her feet now covered in
the red powder paste, she kicks over a vessel filled with rice and coins
to denote the arrival of fertility and wealth in her marital home.

Mooh Dikhai
The family now indulges in a series of games and post-wedding rituals,
amid much laughter to make the new member feel comfortable. One
such ritual is the Mooh dikhai. Literally translated, Mooh Dikhai means
"show your face"; this ritual helps introduce the newlywed to members
of her husband's family. Each member of the groom's family comes in
turn to make an acquaintance with the new bride.

Pheri
In some regions of North India, the couple returns (unaccompanied by
the groom's family) to the bride's parents' home the day after the
wedding, usually for an afternoon meal and evening tea. The groom is
introduced to the bride's side of the extended family and her friends. In
the period between the engagement and the wedding, it is usually
considered bad luck for the groom to visit the bride's house, so the
pheri (literally, return or turning-around; distinct from phere) marks the
beginning of the groom's social integration into the bride's side of the
family. This is what all being done in indian marriages after which bride
is completely of groom and his family and they live their lives hap[pily
thereafter.