Baldassar L. 2008 Missing Kin and Longin

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C:/3B2WIN/temp files/CJIS317085_S100.3d[x] Wednesday, 11th June 2008 14:30:8
Journal of Intercultural Studies

Vol. 29, No. 3, August 2008, pp. 247266
Missing Kin and Longing to be

Together: Emotions and the
Construction of Co-presence in
Transnational Relationships
Loretta Baldassar
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In this paper I explore the emotions of ‘‘missing’’ and ‘‘longing’’ as integral (though not
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essential) features of the kin-work (di Leonardo) and emotional labour (Hochschild)
needed to maintain transnational family relationships. I argue that these emotions
10 manifest in at least four key ways: discursively (through words), physically (through the
body) as well as through actions (practice) and imagination (ideas). Hence, I consider
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emotions through both of the dominant perspectives in theories of emotion
constructionism (with its emphasis on discourse) and embodiment (with its emphasis
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on sensory experience). Drawing on a sample of Italian migrants living in Australia and
15 their ageing parents living in Italy, I argue that the emotions of missing and longing
motivate kin to construct four types of shared (co)presence virtual, proxy, physical and
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imagined which reinforce the sense of family closeness that characterises Italian
conceptions of health and well-being.
Keywords: Co-presence; Emotional Labour; Kin-Work; Longing; Missing; Transnational

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20 Care; Transnational Families

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As the contributors to this special issue attest, transnational family life characterised
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as it is by the separation of kin is a topic that is full of emotion. And yet, as Skrbiš
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Loretta Baldassar is associate professor in the discipline of Anthropology and Sociology, University of Western
Australia. Her teaching and research interests are primarily in migration studies and most recently in
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transnational family relations. Her publications include Visits Home: Migration Experiences between Italy and
Australia (Melbourne University Press, 2001); From Peasant to Global Italians: Veneto Migrants in Australia (with
Ros Pesman, University of Western Australia Press, 2005); and Families Caring Across Borders: Migration, Aging
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and Transnational Caregiving (with Cora Baldock and Raelene Wilding, Palgrave Macmillan, 2007).
Correspondence to: Associate Professor Loretta Baldassar, Discipline of Anthropology and Sociology, School
of Social and Cultural Studies, University of Western Australia, 35 Stirling Hwy, Crawley, WA 6009, Australia.
Email: Loretta.Baldassar@uwa.edu.au
ISSN 0725-6868 print/ISSN 1469-9540 online/08/03247-20

# 2008 Centre for Migrant and Intercultural Studies
DOI: 10.1080/07256860802169196
248 L. Baldassar
(this issue) notes, while its role and importance is usually implicit, emotion and
theories of emotion are rarely the central focus of analyses of transnational processes.
25 Milton and Svašek have highlighted how emotions are often absent from social
science research in general, including their role in fieldwork. In this paper, I focus on
emotions and their expression in transnational caregiving relationships between
migrants and their ageing parents. Of specific interest is the emotional experience of
the ‘‘absence’’ of loved ones, and how that absence is mediated by the creation of
30 various types and degrees of ‘‘(co)presence’’. This discussion emerges out of a large
collaborative study (with Cora Baldock and Raelene Wilding) conducted between
2000 and 2005 that examined six sample groups comprising Australian migrants
settled in Perth and their parents living abroad.1 In particular, I focus on the Italian
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sample and some very emotional exchanges with three elderly mothers in Italy with
35 whom I shared either daylong or overnight visits and whose daughters migrated as
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young, single women.
Our methodology involved conducting semi-structured, quasi-life history inter-
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views with adult migrant children in Perth, usually in their own homes, and then
travelling to their home countries to conduct similar interviews with their parents
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40 and/or primary carers. I was responsible for the Italian sample, which builds on
previous ethnographic research (predominantly in the regions of Veneto and Sicily)
and their homeland kin. Interview material was supplemented with participant
observation at Italian community and social events in Perth. I regularly visited several
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of the families in the Transnational Caregiving study and was often invited to meet
45 parents who were visiting their children from Italy.
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While all the (homeland-based) parents and (adult migrant) children in the study
experience being apart from each other as an emotional issue, there are some
important differences within and across the country group samples in relation to the
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challenges presented by parents ageing. In our book Families Caring Across Borders we
50 develop an analytical model that highlights how the practices and processes of
transnational caregiving are mediated by the capacity to exchange care, cultural
notions of obligation and negotiated commitments within families (Baldassar, Baldock
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and Wilding 15). For example, ideas about what constitutes independence in old age
and related notions about children’s obligation to care for ageing parents differ within
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55 the samples according to gender, with women tending to feel more responsible for
their ageing parents than men. However, our findings also suggest that new
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technologies are influencing transnational caregiving exchange with men taking a

more active role in practices of communication exchange than appears to have been
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the case in the past. Where once women, particularly mothers and daughters, were
60 primarily responsible for the ‘‘kin-work’’ (di Leonardo) of staying in touch, today
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men, particularly of younger generations, are just as likely to be communicating with

overseas kin by email and SMS text messaging as women (Baldassar, Baldock and
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Wilding 120; see also Wilding).

Key differences in transnational caregiving across the samples are particularly
65 evident in relation to what Michael Peter Smith defines as ‘‘state policies, legitimating
Journal of Intercultural Studies 249
discourses and institutional practices’’ governing, in this case, the provision of aged
care services (2). In countries like Italy which might be described following Blackman
as ‘‘family-oriented’’, independence in old aged tends to be constructed as not having
to rely on the state for support and drawing all assistance from kin.2 In these families,
70 ideas about what constitutes ‘‘well-being’’ and being a ‘‘good’’ parent/child tend to be
closely linked to how actively involved in each other’s lives family members are felt to
be. For Italian migrants who are caring for ageing parents, this often translates into
how ‘‘present’’ they are for their parents, with women in particular expressing a
strong sense of obligation to visit as often as possible so that they can provide
75 personal ‘‘hands on’’ care. Similarly, perceptions about health and well-being of older
Italians have been found to be associated with how close they feel they are to their
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children (see, for example, MacKinnon and Nelli 74; see also Baldassar ‘‘Transna-
tional Families and Aged Care’’).
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The social construction of obligation is further influenced by economic and
political contexts. The labour migrations from Italy to Australia in the post-war
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period were seen as good economic decisions to help support family back home. This
is particularly the case for Signora Leda, who along with her children was a refugee
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from Pola, a city that changed from Italian to Yugoslavian rule at the end of the
Second World War. Left destitute in Italian refugee camps, Signora Leda supported
85 two of her children’s decision to leave for Australia in the early 1970s despite the fact
that their departure meant losing their much-needed practical and emotional
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support. In contrast, the more recent migrations of professional migrants, which
are seen as ‘‘lifestyle migrations’’ rather than as an economic necessity, are often not
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supported, particularly by middle-class parents of professional daughters. For
90 example, both Signora Carla and Signora Eva believe that their daughters, who
migrated in 1980 and 1990, respectively, could have successful careers in Italy. This
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lack of ‘‘license to leave’’ can place added emotional pressures on migrants (again
especially daughters) who feel guilty about migrating against their parents’ wishes
and being (physically) absent from their parents’ lives.
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95 Researching and Sharing Emotions: Feeling the Absence

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Almost without exception, participants in the Italian sample ‘‘became emotional’’

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when they discussed their transnational relationships. It is important to note from the
outset that because we contacted parents in the homelands through their migrant
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children in Australia, most of the families in the study enjoyed relatively positive
100 relationships. Our methodology tended to select families who had inactive
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transnational relationships. While it is no doubt the case that some migrants and
their homeland parents are quite happy to be living great distances apart (at least for
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a time) and may even prefer this arrangement to being proximate, in general the
Italian migrants and parents in our sample wished they could be physically closer to
105 each other.
250 L. Baldassar
One of the key emotions that informants in the Italian sample expressed during
interviews was a sense of longing; in particular longing for parents, children and
grandchildren, which people described as ‘‘missing’’ family.3 Many migrants also
frequently expressed a longing for place, in particular their childhood homes, but also
110 a more general longing for the country of their birth, which was described as
homesickness or nostalgia. In Italian, the expression to miss someone or something
(sentire la mancanza) translates literally as ‘‘feeling the absence’’. In this paper I
highlight the experiences of three Italian mothers who clearly and keenly feel the
absence of their migrant daughters as a longing and a loss. At the time of interview,
115 Signora Carla (78 years) and Signora Leda (87 years) were frail elderly widows and
Signora Eva (69 years), in relatively good health, was caring for her seriously ill
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husband. In many ways their feelings of missing and longing, although possibly more
acute because of their particular circumstances, are emblematic of those of other
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parents in the study.
120 The emotions of ‘‘longing for’’ and ‘‘missing’’ people and places manifest in at least
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four key ways: discursively (through words), physically (through the body) as well as
through actions (practice) and imagination (ideas). In addition to talking about their
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feelings of missing kin, bodily manifestations of this type of longing were frequently
clearly visible in tearfulness but also through the (poignant) treatment of certain
125 objects which had come to represent or embody the longed for kin or homeland. The
most common practices that feelings of missing kin inspired in the Italian sample
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included making phone calls, sending emails and SMS text messages and exchanging
greeting cards and gifts. All of these activities and experiences involved people
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imagining transnational family life into being through their feelings of absence and
130 loss. The emotion of longing for and missing people and places therefore appears to
be an integral (though not essential) feature of the kin-work (di Leonardo) and
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emotional labour (Hochschild) needed to maintain transnational relationships.

Singora Eva, who took a long time to accept her daughter’s decision to settle in Perth,
explained that having three children and several grandchildren living close by made it
135 especially difficult for her to feel a similar level of closeness to her loved ones living far
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away, a fact which troubled her:

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I must tell you about distance [. . .] it’s what I don’t like about it [ . . .] but distances
estranges a little bit. Distance estranges [. . .] [My daughter] sends me the photos,
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the cassettes, in this way you have to work at maintaining the relationship [ . . .] You
140 have to listen to your feelings, you have to care, that is, you must care [. . .] You
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maintain the relationship by visiting, letters, phone calls, but first of all it is very
important to keep them in your mind, caring for them all the time and not only
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when you phone or write to them [. . .] This is made easier by having the photos
around the house which help you to keep alive your memories [ . . .]
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145 An analysis of longing and co-presence highlights the need to consider emotions in
each of these four domains: the discursive, physical, praxis and imagined and hence
implicates both of the dominant perspectives in theories of emotion constructionism
with its emphasis on discourse, and embodiment with its emphasis on sensory
experience. In this context, emotional acts can be understood as simultaneously bodily
150 movements, symbolic vehicles that reproduce and affect social relations, and practices
[as well as discourses] that reveal the effects of power (Abu-Lughod and Lutz 12).
Similarly, Schieffelin drew a distinction between inner and outer aspects of emotion, in
which ‘‘emotion’’ is defined as the inward, experiential side of feeling, and ‘‘affect’’ as
its more behaviourally manifested expression (190). In the examples of transnational
155 caregiving discussed in this paper, missing is the inwardly felt emotion and its affect is
the practice of co-presence (virtual, proxy, physical and imagined). Signora Eva’s
account illustrates how she manages emotional acts in the context of transnational
caregiving.
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A relevant (though often overlooked) issue concerning emotional acts in
relation to social science research is how feelings are expressed in the context of an
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160
ethnographic interview. As a researcher, my presence, questioning and participation
in the interviews was without a doubt a partial catalyst for much of the emotion on
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display. For example, my active listening to informant’s ‘‘verbal’’ professions of
longing and missing people and places encouraged them to speak in depth and at
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165 length about their feelings. I could not only view but also comment on the signs and
symbols of ‘‘imagined’’ transnational family life in the photos and objects on display
in their homes. I encouraged informants to show me the evidence of the ‘‘activity’’ of
transnational kin-work in the letters and cards that travelled to and fro as well as the
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often impressive collection of photos, generally set out in large albums, but
sometimes also shown to me on a computer or mobile phone. We created a space,
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170
often during these show and tell moments, in which people allowed themselves the
‘‘physical’’ expression of emotion; framed photos of faraway children were lovingly
hugged, letters were folded and unfolded with great care betraying their emotional
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value, gifts were clasped with affection and such actions were often accompanied by
175 tearfulness. As a researcher I did not simply share in these emotions, I indirectly
sought them out through my interest and concern, which were themselves fuelled by
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the empathy of my own memories of similar experiences of feelings of longing for

people and places. So, for example, many people, particularly elderly mothers,
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described a sense of emotional release from the interview experience itself. A typical
180 example is Singora Carla who, during a daylong visit and interview in which she often
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‘‘became emotional’’, commented:

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I do not talk about my private life to any of my friends the way I am talking to you
now. I would not talk about these things to anybody else [. . .] It’s almost as if it is
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easier with a stranger [. . .] But it has been good for me, you know, it’s good for me
185 to open up a bit, to unload and let out my feelings a little.
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Hence, in theorising emotions in this paper, I am interested in experiences of

emotion as they are articulated, embodied, practiced, imagined and shared between
‘‘subject’’ and ‘‘researcher’’.
252 L. Baldassar
Managing Longing and Missing: Types of (Co)presence

190 The feeling, often referred to as a type of heartache, of longing and missing is
commonly expressed as a desire to be with kin or to be back home (in sending and/or
receiving locales). Indeed, it has long been understood that returning home can cure
the terrible ailment of homesickness: the word nostalgia derives from the Greek verb
nostos, which means to return.4 All of the senses are affected by this longing for and
195 missing as people yearn to see, hear and touch (embrace) their loved ones, just as they
crave the special foods and smells and tastes associated with these people and places.
Hence, the way to manage the heartache of longing for and missing is through sensual
contact and co-presence, in other words, through feeling the presence of people and
places involving all of the five senses. The expressions of longing and missing or
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200 absence and loss thus appear to be manifestations of the emotional need for reunion
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and return or co-presence.
As a consequence of their absence and separation, migrants and their parents long
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to be with each other. A sense of shared ‘‘presence’’ can be constructed in four main
ways: virtually, by proxy, physically and through imagination. Given the distances of
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205 time and geography that separate transnational family members, the most frequent
and common contact is through virtual co-presence, which is constructed through
various communication technologies. Due to the significant improvements and
dramatic reduction in costs of these technologies, virtual forms of co-presence among
the Italians who participated in this study are today most commonly constructed
210
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through the sense of hearing; either directly by verbal exchanges on the telephone (or
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increasingly on webcam, which also provides the sense of sight) or indirectly by
reading communications in the form of written words on email or SMS messages.5
Co-presence by proxy is achieved indirectly through objects and people whose physical
presence embodies the spirit of the longed for absent person or place. Each of the five
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215 senses can be utilised to construct this form of presence (the person or object can be
touched, heard, seen, etc.), although, the physical manifestation of this (proxy)
presence serves as the abstraction of an imagined presence. While virtual and proxy
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forms of co-presence are highly valued, it is generally felt that longing, missing and
nostalgia are best resolved through physical co-presence; actually being bodily present
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220 with the longed for person or in the longed for place so as to experience them fully,
with all five senses. A fourth type of co-presence, imagined co-presence might be
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added to this list, although it is arguably a dimension of each of the other forms
described. Here I am thinking in particular of the importance that many Italian
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parents placed on praying daily for their migrant children. Singora Eva explained that
225 her nightly prayers are one sure way to ‘‘keep them in my heart’’, it enabled her to
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ensure she was ‘‘with them every day’’.

In the rest of this paper, I explore the ways people experience different degrees of
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co-presence in their transnational caregiving relationships, how they are created,

which senses are employed and how emotionally satisfying they are, including my
230 participation in these experiences as a researcher.
Virtual Co-presence: ‘‘Keeping in Touch’’ and ‘‘Staying in Contact’’

Singora Leda began to cry so often during the interview that I suggested we go for a
walk together and change the subject for a while. Despite her obvious sadness,
Signora Leda insisted we continue the interview because she felt it was good for her to
235 speak about such things. As refugees, the Leda family had re-built their lives in post-
war Italy from nothing. Consequently, Signora Leda and her four children struggled
to make ends meet. With one daughter and one son in Australia and a daughter in a
town hundreds of kilometres away, Signora Leda lives with her youngest son who
works long hours and is seldom home. Her greatest joy is her grandchildren and her
240 greatest sadness is not knowing her Australian-born grandchildren:
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It makes me so sad, so, so sad, because I don’t know them. I’ve never met them.
When they phone they say ‘‘hello Nonna’’. I hear them, I hear them on the phone
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[. . .]. They cannot afford to visit and I cannot afford to visit them. Even their
mother [my daughter-in-law] cannot speak Italian, but it is a great thing to hear
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245 her gentle voice on the phone, I can feel the affection [. . .] The telephone is good
because you can hear the voice [. . .] we can hear each other. [When I talk to my
daughter in Australia on the phone] It feels like [she] is here with me, it feels as
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though I am giving her a hug.
As it is the most prevalent form of transnational communication, many people spend

250 a great deal of effort creating virtual co-presence with their longed for family and
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friends. The activities of communication and personal exchange are collectively
described as ‘‘keeping in touch’’ and ‘‘staying in contact’’. These very phrases betray
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the central purpose of such practices as ‘‘standing in for’’ physical presence, touch
and contact. Transnational ‘‘contact’’, its type, frequency and regularity, is largely
255 determined by access to reliable, affordable and appropriate technologies. Some
aspects of access are dependent on state provision of infrastructures and services.
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Whether people have the physical skill and knowledge (including language and
literacy) or ability to utilise these technologies are factors that in varying degrees
relate to individual capacity.
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260 The time and financial commitment involved in the exchange of virtual co-presence
is another important consideration that influences not only the individual involved in
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transnational caregiving but their local family as well. Putting time and money,
particularly if these are scarce resources, into ‘‘staying in touch’’ with family overseas
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often means less time and money for local needs; having other household members
265 willing to support transnational care is therefore a significant variable. Baldassar,
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Baldock and Wilding’s research indicates that people constantly struggle to find time
to ‘‘stay in touch’’, including shopping for and posting gifts, writing cards, letters and
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emails and importantly, finding ‘‘the right’’ time to phone, ensuring that both caller
and called can talk without interruption (108). The cost of calls, the quality of the
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270 phone line and the challenges posed by the six to seven hour time difference between
Italy and Perth influence people’s sense of satisfaction with the virtual co-presence
provided by phone calls. Accommodating working hours and family meals often
254 L. Baldassar
means migrants have to stay up late at night in order to call home. Many families
resolve these difficulties by deciding on a regular phone time, usually on Sunday
275 afternoons when people are generally freer and calls are often cheapest. The ability,
afforded by mobile phones and email, to send and receive messages at any time is
greatly valued, particularly by younger kin, who are comfortable using this technology.
Baldassar, Baldock and Wilding found that new forms of communication do not
necessarily displace old forms (117). The majority of the Italian parents in the sample
280 strongly favoured the telephone as the principle means of contacting their migrant
children. However, the professional migrants, all of whom have high access to a variety
of reliable forms of communication technologies, use different forms of communica-
tion for different purposes and with different people. Aside from the almost exclusive
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use of telephone calls with parents, these migrants tend to use phone calls for
285 ‘‘catching up’’ and email and SMS texts for frequent, often daily, though rarely serious
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exchanges with siblings and friends. Regardless of age or social class, letter writing
appears to have reduced dramatically, while postcards and greeting cards are reserved
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for ritual greetings like birthdays, anniversaries and religious feast days, videotapes for
important events like weddings and funerals and audiotapes for atypical messages and
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290 greetings, including from those too young or old to use other forms of communica-
tion. It could be argued that telephone calls and audiotapes hold a special place in the
creation of virtual co-presence because of their ability to transmit voice that is heard.
As the quote from Signora Leda indicates, hearing the voice of a loved one can render
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them more present than simply reading their words, particularly if communicating in
295 real time by phone. This argument would suggest that virtual co-presence is even more
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firmly established with webcam, which involves the additional sense of sight.6 The
extra information provided by hearing and seeing people, if only virtually via the
phone or skype, arguably improves the highly valued ability to cross check the validity
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of what is being said with how it is being said.

300 Among the Italians, there is a relatively common practice of concealing information
that might provoke anxiety.7 For example, people think carefully about whether to tell
faraway kin about health concerns or other personal difficulties so as not to ‘‘worry’’
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them and, as Signora Carla explained, ‘‘not to make them feel guilty’’. The rationale for
this secrecy is closely tied to the need (often expressed as an obligation) for physical
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305 co-presence. It suggests that when kin are physically absent, their ability to respond
appropriately to bad news is limited by distance. It is their lack of ability to simply be
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there in a physical sense that is the issue. Indeed, this kind of bad news is often the
catalyst for a visit and period of co-presence and personal (hands on) caregiving. The
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editing out of particularly bad news commonly results in people trying to verify and
310 validate information, to check that their kin are ‘‘really okay’’. This is often done by
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trying to discern any signs of distress in people’s voices or by trying to interpret

silences. In fact, it is the additional information of voice, tone and expression that
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make phone calls the preferred medium of virtual communication for many Italian
parents. Mothers in particular pride themselves on their ability to be able to tell if there
315 is something wrong simply by hearing the sound of their child’s voice. This capability
makes people feel they are ‘‘still close’’. Hence, the effective (emotional) use of
technologies often serves to ‘‘collapse’’ distance and render people virtually co-present.
As already noted, many factors serve to limit the effective use of technologies and
diminish their ability to mitigate the sense of distance. Of particular relevance to our
320 study of ageing is how physical and mental ability to use technologies can be limited
by health and age. Mental illnesses like dementia, for example, make phone calls
difficult and diseases like arthritis can affect people’s ability to use technology. In
these instances the need (obligation) for physical co-presence is increased because it
cannot be attained in other ways. In addition, the majority of the Italian parents in
325 the study were less confident and capable in their use of newer forms of technology.
Indeed, the relationship between ageing and the use of newer forms of communica-
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tion technologies appears to have influenced the patterns and forms of virtual co-
presence in transnational families (Baldassar, Baldock and Wilding 118). Further
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research is needed to substantiate our findings, which suggest that while in the past
330 the ‘‘hub’’ of contact tended to be provided by the migrant’s parents (usually mother)
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in the homeland, who received all news and then distributed it through family
networks, today it is just as likely for news to travel first to a migrant’s niece or
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nephew, who is a skilled computer user, who then passes on the information to their
grandparents (the migrants’ parents) and so on.
335 As a result of these new technologies and the (younger) age and (more equal)
gender patterns of their use, it is more likely for extended kin to be drawn into the
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relationships of reciprocal obligation and transnational communication. Singora
Leda, showing an unfamiliarity with computer technologies that is characteristic of
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her generation, explained that her granddaughter (in Italy) sends messages to her
340 aunt in Australia ‘‘with that thing, I do not remember what it’s called’’ and then
shares the information with her. Signora Carla, displaying a similar lack of confidence
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about technology, explained that before ‘‘the in-ter-net’’ (a word she articulated
slowly and with some uncertainty) her son and daughter rarely communicated; ‘‘now
[her daughter] sends him these messages, which I don’t understand how. So they’re in
345 touch now’’. Singora Eva reported that she ‘‘stopped writing letters’’ when her (local
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and migrant) daughters began sending email messages to each other. While she states
categorically that ‘‘the email is not for me’’, Singora Eva sees the value of email for
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keeping her children in close contact; ‘‘the siblings are happier with email [ . . .] I
prefer the telephone [ . . .] because I can listen to her voice and it is as if she was
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350 present, I can hear her well, the line is clear, it is like she is next door’’.
Patterns of communication evident in the Italian sample suggest that grandchildren,
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nieces and nephews in both home and host countries commonly receive and send
email messages on behalf of aunts, uncles and grandparents and so become active
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participants in the exchange of virtual co-presence, bearing the burden of providing

the gift of self through the time and effort they put into such exchanges but also being
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355
rewarded by receiving the self work and care of others. As a result of these
transnational obligations these younger and extended kin may develop a more central
role in transnational family relations than would have occurred in the past. Singora
256 L. Baldassar
Carla’s local grandson maintained email contact with his cousin in Australia and
360 reported on these exchanges on his infrequent visits to his grandmother such that for
Signora Carla he had come to embody his Australian cousin; ‘‘I like it that they keep in
touch, when I see [my local grandson] I feel like I am also in some way seeing [my
Australian grandson]’’.
Co-presence by Proxy: Embodied Internalised Presences

365 Give [my Australian migrant daughter] a big hug from me. (Signora Eva)
Letters are more beautiful than the telephone because they are real things, they remain,
you can keep them and go back to them. (Singora Leda)
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When I interviewed her in 2003, Singora Carla described her daily struggle with
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370 loneliness that, since her husband died a few years earlier, becomes particularly bad in
the evenings. Her daughter lives in Australia and her son, although he lives close by,
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does not visit often. Her closest friends have died and she has little energy for
socialising. In an effort to deal with the emptiness of her three-story house, a floor
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each intended for her children, she has developed a nightly ritual:
375 in the evening, at six thirty, I go to bed. I go to bed, but not to sleep. I prop myself
up with two pillows and I take a book. I start reading [. . .] I’m ashamed to tell you
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this [. . .] you see, there are my husband’s two pillows, so I put them around myself,
just like this [enacts position]. And then I have a photo of him on my bedside table.
I feel more protected. So, when it starts to get dark, I begin to feel all melancholy, so
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380 instead of walking round, seeing everything in this empty house, I get into my bed
and feel protected, but I know it sounds a bit foolish [seems slightly embarrassed].
Anyway, I feel protected and I stay there. Then I bring the phone close to the
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cushions. Then my son calls me every evening, and my daughter twice a week. So,
there you have it [. . .] at six thirty I go to bed.
385 Aware of her loneliness, Signora Carla explains that her children keep encouraging her to
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move into an aged care hostel or take in a live-in carer. In an effort to explain why she does
not take their advice, although she recognises that her situation is not good, she says,
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but here I feel [ . . .] I’ve lived here for many years, yes? And so the things are my
company. It seems that they have a Soul, do you know what I mean? As a poem
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390 says: ‘‘Inanimate objects, perhaps you have a soul that attaches itself to our soul,
giving us the strength to love’’. It’s exactly that. Here I feel, wherever I turn [. . .]
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that reminds me of something; that reminds me of something else [. . .] it’s just as if

I had company, do you know what I mean?
N
At the end of my visit with Signora Carla I had spent several hours with her, shared a
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395 meal and looked at many of her photos. She ended our interview by saying:
in the long afternoons when I have nothing to do, I take out all the photographs and
relive all the events and emotions of the past [ . . .] My only regret is that as time goes
by and I will not be able to see [my grandson] grow up. [My daughter] sometimes
sends me photos of him. So I pass the time this way. I go through my photographs.
400 Special ‘‘transnational objects’’ including photos, letters, cards, memorabilia and gifts
are important largely because of their tangibility they can be touched and held and
thus take the physical place of the longed for person or location. They represent, or
more specifically, ‘‘stand for’’ the absence of being. There are strong parallels here
with Mauss’s classic notion of the gift, imbued with the spirit of the giver, replete with
405 the obligations of reciprocity that such gifts imply. For example, the photograph of
her grandson that Singora Eva presses to her heart as we speak embodies her
grandchild. Importantly, such items are also manifestations of continuing reciprocal
caregiving relationships and, like gifts, their very existence obliges their owner to
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maintain and reciprocate relationships with the person or place that the object
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410 represents. The photo’s location, occupying pride of place in the kitchen, is evidence
of Signora Eva’s commitment to her relationship with this child. She shows the photo
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to all who call, thus physically demonstrating her love (including overtly in the way
she cradles and kisses the picture) and uses the photo as evidence of the fact that her
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grandchild, though far away, is constantly in her thoughts, and hence, a constant
415 presence.
In Casey’s terms, these ‘‘transnational objects’’ embody the internalised presence
of the absent and longed for people and places. It could also be argued that special
days (birthdays, feast days, anniversaries) can come to embody the presence of
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absent people and places who ‘‘come to mind’’ on these days often generating more
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420 intense feelings of longing and subsequently inspiring the exchange of phone calls
and greeting cards. The power of these special objects and memory triggers helps to
explain the frequency and seriousness that characterises the exchange of recipes. At
first I was rather surprised by how frequently and commonly informants reported
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on their interest in obtaining recipes from home or in sending new recipes back
425 there. Migrant daughters and sons commonly contacted their parents (usually
mothers) to obtain a favourite recipe. People often commented on the fact that the
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ease and immediacy with which recipes can be exchanged (by phone or email)
contributes to the feeling of being close despite the distance, as Singora Eva said;
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‘‘it’s just like they’re down the road’’. In addition, preparing a recipe provides a
430 powerful way of creating the presence (by proxy) of absent family and places and
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migrants try in earnest to create a dish that tastes ‘‘like mum’s’’ or ‘‘of home’’. Many
have written evocatively about the importance of food in migration and much of
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this sentiment is captured by the image of Signora Leda’s Australian migrant son
serving his children a dish that embodies the grandmother they have never been
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435 physically co-present with but who is rendered real to them through the taste,
smell, sight and texture of the food, not to mention the hearing of the stories that
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accompany this act.

Such objects and other memory triggers represent, by proxy, the longed for kin
and the emotion of missing them; they are evidence of love and affection as well as
258 L. Baldassar
440 of loss and yearning. Such inanimate objects actually animate the practices,
imagining and emotionality of transnational family life.8 The volume and newness
of such items can reveal how frequently they are exchanged and thus indicate
whether people keep in constant contact or not. Their age might reveal how long
people have been separated by time and distance. Their location in houses, on
445 public display in entrance halls or hidden in bottom bedroom draws, can speak
volumes about the emotional meaning they hold for the owner. Similarly, other
kinds of objects indicate emotional attachment to place, common among Italians in
the sample were paintings and photos of ancestral villages, birthplaces and
countryside and a variety of objects that are imbued with a sense of place
450 including, for example, small polished pebbles collected from someone’s front yard,
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a glass bottle of sand from a favourite beach, certain plants and trees and so on.
The importance of the ‘‘tangibility’’ of these objects, which might be described as
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their ‘‘emotionality’’, that is, their ability to be ‘‘felt’’ or at least to be used as a
conduit for emotion and feeling by proxy, is in many instances more important
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455 than their content. The activity of touching and seeing and sometimes even
smelling (for example, letters scented with their writer’s favourite perfume) and
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hearing (for example, audio-taped messages) these items renders them important
expressions of emotion and obligation. Hence, receiving a letter or card is in itself
significant regardless of what is actually written in it. As we discuss in our book,
460 the arrival of a ‘‘blue airmail letter’’ (a distinctive example of postal technology),
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particularly during periods of acute homesickness, could trigger great excitement
and feelings of ‘‘being closer’’ to home (Baldassar, Baldock and Wilding 115).
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Although, as one Italian migrant complained, they could also prompt feelings of
guilt about being so far away or about not being in touch often enough.
465 Similarly, the ritual exchange of greeting cards and gifts may serve a similar
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purpose, they are often of no practical value and contain little or no information
about the sender but are a visible sign of enduring relationships. This is not to
suggest that the content of these objects is unimportant. Much like the meta-
languages and messages of virtual communication exchange, people are intent on
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470 ‘‘reading between the lines’’ of letters and cards and interpret the frequency, type
and timing of gifts in relation to the health and well-being of not only their faraway
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kin, but of their transnational relationships as well. One aunt continued to send
weekly letters and monthly gifts to her migrant niece, guessing correctly that her
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niece’s uncharacteristic unresponsiveness indicated she was suffering a period of

475 depression. This aunt was later disappointed to discover that her niece’s favourite
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magazines had become available in Australia because posting them was her way of
expressing her love and care, they had come to represent her by proxy.
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The Researcher as Embodied Presence

It is in analysing the significance of co-presence by proxy that the role of the
480 ethnographer in researching emotion is most visible. In our book we consider the
implications of methodologies of transnational life in which the experiences and

practices we research ‘‘are both emotionally intimate and geographically distant’’
(Baldassar, Baldock and Wilding 17). In conducting participant observation, I could
not be detached from the emotion of my informants. As noted by Hume and
485 AQ1 Mulcock, this type of qualitative research demands that relations of trust are
established between informants and researchers. My emotional involvement was in
some ways heightened by the nature of the fieldwork. I first interviewed adult
migrant children in Perth and then with their permission travelled to visit their
parents in the home country. I was incorporated into families to varying degrees as
490 quasi-kin based on my age and family life stage. For example, the Italian parents I
interviewed frequently saw me as ‘‘like a migrant child’’. Many of the Italian migrants
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I interviewed were delighted by the prospect that I would visit their parents,
particularly those I had come to know well, knowing that this would bring their
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parents some measure of happiness. For those elderly parents who had limited
knowledge of research and academia, contacting them through their children led
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495
many to see me as their children’s ‘‘friend’’. This identity sat awkwardly with me as a
researcher, because it immediately located me within the web of transnational
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reciprocal obligations and to this day I struggle with feelings of guilt about the
obligation to ‘‘stay in touch’’. In short, like the photos and objects that represented
500 longed for people and places, researchers may also come to embody the internalised
presence of transnational kin and country by proxy. D
As noted earlier, the project sample was somewhat biased towards positive family
relations. Even so, one migrant refused me permission to visit her parents because of
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the strained relations between them. Signora Carla’s daughter felt that despite her
505 mother’s continuing disapproval of her decision to live abroad, my visiting would
brighten her day, although she expected her mother would complain about her ‘‘the
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whole time’’. By the end of many interviews, some women informants embraced me,
on the stated understanding that I would ‘‘pass on this hug’’ to their mother, child or
grandchildren. Men frequently put out their hands for heartfelt handshakes and their
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510 tearful eyes betrayed the extent of their longing, a depth of emotion, which had often
gone unspoken during the interview. Parents, in particular, were genuinely happy to
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see me and to hear my news of their children, to touch the letters and photos or
perhaps to smell and feel the gifts I brought with me from them. Then of course, not
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being the actual child or parent, I could also hear the laments and witness the more
515 negative emotions, the guilt at not being close by to help ageing parents or new
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mothers; the anger at a child who migrated against her family’s wishes, the frustration
at irregular and insufficient communication, and most affecting of all, the terrible
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pain of loneliness that sometimes accompanies longing, particularly for the very
elderly and infirm and also for new mothers. Interestingly, while I was asked to and
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520 was happy to pass on the joyous greetings of love and longing, I was careful to conceal
any negative emotions of anger or frustration as these were to be kept secret from
distant kin.
260 L. Baldassar
Drawing on Svašek’s work, the role of co-presence in migration and transnational

family relations is clearly connected to the embeddedness of individual bodies and
525 minds in sociality and intersubjectivity. People need to be co-present in order to
maintain social relationships. Casey’s notion of ‘‘internalised presence’’ assists in
analysing the dialectics of individuality and sociality amongst transnational family
members. Sharing co-presence by proxy reaffirms both individual and family roles
and relationships. Similarly, Overing and Passes’ concept of ‘‘conviviality’’ is helpful
530 in examining how individuals are linked through love and grief for kin. It is
conviviality and communion, coming together to be together, which is sought out in
the visit, the avenue to physical co-presence for transnational families.
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Physical Co-presence: The Importance of ‘‘Being There’’
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535 I miss [my grandson] so much it’s hard to explain, it doesn’t seem possible to miss
someone that much. If I had had them [Australian migrant daughter and grandson]
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here with me, that would have been complete joy. (Signora Carla)
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Before going to Australia I suffered very much. I used to cry thinking of [my daughter],
I was crying, that is all [ . . .]. I stopped crying after I visited her in Australia [. . .] I
540 saw her in front of me . . . she was all right, she was happy. (Signora Eva)
Whenever my daughter comes over here, it is as if we have been together forever.

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(Signora Leda)
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Longing for physical co-presence is most often expressed by migrants and parents as a
need to ‘‘see’’ their transnational kin, with their ‘‘own eyes’’, in order to confirm their
545 health and well-being ‘‘for themselves’’. How well this function could be preformed by
the latest technologies such as webcam is an interesting question. Also explicitly
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expressed by informants is the need to ‘‘be there’’ for people, to be physically present,
which confirms that ‘‘physical co-presence’’ is valued more highly than ‘‘virtual co-
presence’’. Less overt in interviews but always implicit is the need to touch each other,
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550 to embrace. In fact, as noted above, some of the data about longing to be physically
co-present was acted out (through the body) in the interview exchange in the way
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people held and touched the objects which embodied their absent kin. In
transnational family contexts, physical co-presence can only be achieved through
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visits (or repatriation or parent migration). Visits often motivate an increase in

555 virtual and proxy transnational communication both before and immediately
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following them. This pre-visit work is needed to prepare for physical co-presence,
not only to organise the many details of travel, accommodation and itinerary but also
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to try to ensure that people are familiar enough with each other to limit any feelings
of awkwardness when they finally meet up. The post-visit work is usually intended to
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560 reassure kin that the exchange was genuine and that it will be repeated.
As the single avenue for embodied co-presence, visits, particularly the reunions
that I witnessed among Italians, are often marked by explicit and emphatic, even
exaggerated public ritualised displays of physical touch embracing was often

proceeded by a slow and deliberate moving towards each other with arms
565 outstretched followed by a long, firm and savoured embrace that frequently turned
into a kind of dance or pirouette. Kissing on the cheeks was often loud and deliberate,
each one firmly placed often repeatedly. Arms were tightly clasped, backs rubbed
rather than slapped and hands held rather than shaken with physical contact
persisting (hands held on to) or being constantly re-established. This display of
570 physical contact seemed to indicate as well as reassure people that their kin ‘‘haven’t
changed a bit’’, that they remain ‘‘just the same’’, that despite the distance, they still
have a son or daughter, mother or father. In this way, physical co-presence allows
people to act out and express their sense of ‘‘closeness’’ or intimacy, showing with
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their bodies that they still ‘‘know’’ each other and confirming through touch that they
575 are really okay.
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This need to be physically co-present with, ‘‘to see’’ and ‘‘be with’’ kin, appears to
be most acute for parents who have never visited their migrant children and so have
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never had the opportunity ‘‘to check up on’’ their children in person. Similarly,
grandparents expressed a great desire to ‘‘see’’ grandchildren and migrants to ‘‘see’’
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580 ailing parents, particularly if disability makes it impossible for them to construct
virtual co-presence through phone calls or letters. Importantly, a significant outcome
of ‘‘seeing’’ children and grandchildren is that parents are often reassured and more
accepting of the migrant’s decision to settle abroad. A visit appears to be the best way
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of resolving tensions associated with a lack of license to leave.
585 Elsewhere, we have constructed a typology of five types of visits (Baldassar, Baldock
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and Wilding 139) in an effort to further our understanding of the importance of visits
and physical co-presence in the process of transnational caregiving. Crisis visits
usually involve the specific need to care for distant kin, often through the provision of
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‘‘hands on’’ personal care or respite care, and usually in response to a sudden
590 emergency (death, serious illness, difficulty surrounding birth of new baby or
divorce). Duty and Ritual visits include attendance and participation in rites of
passage (births, deaths, marriages), key celebrations and anniversaries, where the
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visitor feels an obligation to attend and where their physical presence is expected and
anticipated. The most common examples of such visits are those motivated by key
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595 life-cycle events including, in particular, weddings, funerals and special anniversaries.
Routine visits are most common for people who can visit frequently and regularly. It is
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often the additional motivations besides kin-work that make these visits possible.
Hence, business duties, professional development as well as meetings or conference
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attendance in the parent’s country of residence enable migrants to ‘‘add on’’ a visit
600 home to their work itineraries.9
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Visits undertaken by people who do not visit often, perhaps only once or twice in a
lifetime, are often described as special visits, as being somehow different and set apart
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from routine motivations to visit. Tourist visits are brief visits to kin as part of a
longer itinerary, which include travel to tourist sites. These visits are mainly
605 conducted by the second-generation, extended kin, including adult grandchildren,
262 L. Baldassar
aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces, nephews and friends of family.10 These visits invariably
result in a broadening or widening of the transnational networks of caregiving, as
migrants develop and consolidate relationships with a variety of kin (and vice versa),
forming the basis of new or reinvigorated transnational communication relations.
610 In my previous work I argue that visits are often a type of rite of passage that brings
about a change in identity and belonging (Visits Home). The visit is also sometimes
spoken about as affording a kind of redemption and spiritual renewal. Here the visit
can be described as a secular pilgrimage a personal quest for spiritual, emotional
and mental well-being. This quest is expressed by informants as a set of physical,
615 corporeal needs, a longing to re-visit the places of their past, the places they knew so
well but have been separated from. This need is only fulfilled by being physically
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present in a place where they can breathe or smell the air, touch the soil and taste the
produce, hear the bell-tower or the call to prayer, feel the earth and see the homeland.
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In cases where there are no longer significant consociate obligations and attachments,
620 as after the death of parents, migrants may continue to visit through secular
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pilgrimages, to renew and recharge their connections to place and their memories of
loved ones.
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The emotional and moral support that is the bedrock of transnational family
relations is rendered particularly special and out-of-the-ordinary when it can occur
625 face to face rather than from a distance. The simple act of seeing each other and of
being co-present sets the visit apart from other forms of co-presence. However, the
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notion that seeing each other less frequently somehow leads to ‘‘closer’’ or better
quality exchanges must be tempered with the possibility that people are on their best
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behaviour during visits. While our findings support Goffman’s view that ‘‘copresence
630 renders persons uniquely accessible, available and subject to one another’’ (22) and
although Urry notes that ‘‘eye contact enables and stabilises intimacy and trust, as
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well as the perception of insincerity and fear’’ (164), Baldassar, Baldock and Wilding
caution against the tendency to privilege co-presence as more authentic than other
forms of communication by assuming that being present is directly related to
635 knowing ‘‘the real’’ or ‘‘the truth’’ (152). This denies the possibility for co-present
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people to deceive each other, to suppress parts of themselves, and to act in a role
(especially for short periods of co-presence). It also privileges physical co-presence
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over other virtual and proxy co-presence, which as indicated in the previous sections
of this paper, can very successfully facilitate transnational caregiving exchanges
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640 including the gift of self and a sense of closeness despite geographical distance.
For most people, most of the time, visits are a quintessentially good experience and
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people greatly enjoy them. However, another important dimension of the visit
experience is its potential for disappointment and disillusionment. Visits can be
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problematic and are not necessarily the solution to tenuous or difficult family
relations as the ongoing tensions between Signora Carla and her daughter attest.
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645
Perhaps part of the negative potential of visits can be attributed to the high
expectations that tend to surround them; as with ideas about family, they are steeped
in expectations of good will and happiness. The time, effort and money it takes to
make visits can leave people anticipating wonderful moments of joyous reunion and
650 resolution. The reality may be quite different, particularly when it involves crisis visits
and caregiving, although problems are common in routine visits as well.
Conclusion: Longing for Co-presence

Meaningful social relationships are traditionally and perhaps ideally played out in
face-to-face co-present settings. When this is not possible, relationships are sustained
655 over time and distance through other means of ‘‘presencing’’. All forms of co-presence
have the potential to consolidate relationships of reciprocity and caregiving. Strong
and affecting emotions like longing for and missing serve to maintain and affirm
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relationships across distance in four key ways discursively, physically (though the
body), and through action and imagination. The emotional investment evident in the
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660 discourse of longing, the bodily responses, the activity of transnational longing and
the imagining of transnational family serve to maintain transnational relationships
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over time. These relationships are revitalised, strengthened and reaffirmed through
virtual, proxy, physical and imagined co-presence.
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Though privately experienced as missing and longing, these emotions have a social
665 outcome through the need for co-presence, hence they are socially located and have a
social aim. Such emotions are therefore located not only in the person, but in the
social situation and interaction which they help construct (Schieffelin 191). In
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addition, an analysis of longing and co-presence highlights the importance of
understanding the bodily dimensions of emotions which, as Milton argues, are often
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670 left out of discursive analyses of emotions. Such bodily dimensions can be private,
evident in Signora Carla’s evening ritual and/or public, clearly visible in the
exaggerated embrace and associated ritualised displays of face-to-face reunion.
Both these examples of physical expressions of emotion reveal how emotions can
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bridge the domain of cultural meanings and bodily feelings (Leavitt 530). The
675 emotion of longing for and missing provide the motivation for the communication
and kin-work needed to produce a bridge of co-presence between transnational kin.
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In discussing the role of the ethnographer in sharing these ‘‘transnational emotions’’

with participants I hope to have brought a stronger degree of the everyday lived
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experience to the analysis of the transnational domestic sphere.

680 From the broader study, we have argued that access to new communication
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technologies increases the obligation and desire for regular transnational family
contact (Baldassar, Baldock and Wilding 223). By increasing the sense of ‘‘presence’’
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of family across time and space, the exchange of virtual and proxy co-presence, along
with imaged co-presence, appears to increase the incidence of physical co-presence.
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685 At the same time, advances in travel technologies have increased the opportunity to
be physically co-present. The more virtual and proxy communications occur across
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distance, the more likely people are to seek out and create physical co-presence and
vice versa. New communication technologies have thus increased opportunities
available to people for creating various types of co-presence.
264 L. Baldassar
690 An important motivation for increased co-presence is the emotion of missing or

longing. The sense of ‘‘presence’’ that results from virtual, proxy and imagined
exchanges appears to be strong for all participants in the Italian sample. However,
there is clear evidence to suggest that physical co-presence is valued more highly than
other forms. Further, the majority of parents showed a strong preference for
695 telephone exchange over other types of virtual co-presence, not only because it is
more familiar and therefore easier to use but also because it delivers voice, which
makes people feel closer and more present. In addition, the embodied presence
provided by special ‘‘transnational objects’’, particularly photographs, appears to
provide an important presence by proxy that functions, along with the imagined co-
700 presence afforded by prayer, as a constant reminder of transnational kin. These
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embodied and imagined presences fill the absences left between phone calls, letters
and visits helping to foster the sense of family closeness that appears so important to
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Italian conceptions of health and well-being.
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Acknowledgements
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705 I would like to thank Raelene Wilding for her valuable guidance with this paper and
Maruška Svašek, Kay Milton, Zlatko Skrbiš and the anonymous reviewers for their
helpful comments.
Notes
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[1] The project (funded by the Australia Research Council Large Grant A00000731) comprises
710 over 200 ethnographic interviews and participant observations with Australian migrants and
their parents living in Ireland, Italy, the Netherlands, Singapore and New Zealand as well as
refugees from Iraq and Afghanistan and their kin living in transit in Iran. There were
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approximately 20 families in each country group and the majority of the migrants and
refugees settled in Perth, Western Australia after 1980. Reflecting changes in Australian
715 immigration policy from the massive post-Second World War labour migration intake to a
strict preference for professional and skilled migrants in the last few decades: about 75 per
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cent of the sample comprises white-collar migrants and their predominantly middle-class
homeland kin. The remainder of the sample, including most of the refugees and a small
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proportion of the Italian and Irish samples, comprises blue-collar workers.

720 [2] In contrast, in the countries which Blackman describes as more ‘‘individually-oriented’’, like
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the Netherlands and New Zealand which have relatively well-developed aged care services,
independence tends to be associated with not having to rely on one’s family (see also
Blackman, Brodhurst and Convery). This argument is further elaborated in Baldassar,
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Wilding and Baldock.

725 [3] People rarely used the term ‘‘longing’’ in interviews, but in their frequent discussions and
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explicit statements about ‘‘missing’’ kin the sense of longing for them was clearly evident.
I have tended to use the two terms longing and missing interchangeably in this paper, largely
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because it is clumsy, in English at least, to talk about the feeling of missing someone. We say,
‘‘I miss her’’ not ‘‘I feel I miss her’’, but ‘‘missing someone’’ is nevertheless a feeling.
730 [4] The issue of nostalgia and emotions (longing for place) will not be developed in this paper.
Other papers in this special issue highlight the important role of sensory experience during
the return (visit) home to resolve feelings of nostalgia for place (see Fitzgerald this issue;
Lambkin this issue).
[5] It could be argued that email exchange in real time is also a direct form of exchange even
735 though it relies on reading words and not hearing voice. Similarly taped messages, although
they deliver voice, could be described as indirect exchanges as they do not occur in real time.
[6] There were very few instances of webcam being used in our samples during the main period
of research in the early 2000s and only one case in the Italian sample.
[7] For a fuller discussion see Baldassar ‘‘Transnational Families and the Provision of Moral and
740 Emotional Support’’; see also Baldock.
[8] See Thomas for a discussion of the ‘‘polysemic nature’’ of what she calls ‘‘diasporic’’ gifts,
which she argues are deployed to focus attention on absence, loss and transformation (146).
[9] Baldock notes that professionals often seek out work-related opportunities in locations near
to their families living abroad to facilitate such visits.
[10] Included in this category are package tours that take groups of travellers to re-discover their
F
745
origins or to discover the adopted homelands of their emigrant kin.
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AUTHOR’S QUERY SHEET

Author(s): L. Baldassar CJIS 317085

Journal of Intercultural Studies

Missing Kin and Longing to be

Keywords: Co-presence; Emotional Labour; Kin-Work; Longing; Missing; Transnational

20 Care; Transnational Families

ISSN 0725-6868 print/ISSN 1469-9540 online/08/03247-20

technologies are influencing transnational caregiving exchange with men taking a

men, particularly of younger generations, are just as likely to be communicating with

Wilding 120; see also Wilding).

Journal of Intercultural Studies 249

95 Researching and Sharing Emotions: Feeling the Absence

Almost without exception, participants in the Italian sample ‘‘became emotional’’

emotional labour (Hochschild) needed to maintain transnational relationships.

away, a fact which troubled her:

Journal of Intercultural Studies 251

the empathy of my own memories of similar experiences of feelings of longing for

‘‘became emotional’’, commented:

Hence, in theorising emotions in this paper, I am interested in experiences of

Managing Longing and Missing: Types of (Co)presence

ensure she was ‘‘with them every day’’.

co-presence in their transnational caregiving relationships, how they are created,

Journal of Intercultural Studies 253

Virtual Co-presence: ‘‘Keeping in Touch’’ and ‘‘Staying in Contact’’

As it is the most prevalent form of transnational communication, many people spend

of what is being said with how it is being said.

trying to discern any signs of distress in people’s voices or by trying to interpret

Journal of Intercultural Studies 255

participants in the exchange of virtual co-presence, bearing the burden of providing

Co-presence by Proxy: Embodied Internalised Presences

that reminds me of something; that reminds me of something else [. . .] it’s just as if

Journal of Intercultural Studies 257

accompany this act.

niece’s uncharacteristic unresponsiveness indicated she was suffering a period of

The Researcher as Embodied Presence

Journal of Intercultural Studies 259

implications of methodologies of transnational life in which the experiences and

Drawing on Svašek’s work, the role of co-presence in migration and transnational

Whenever my daughter comes over here, it is as if we have been together forever.

visits (or repatriation or parent migration). Visits often motivate an increase in

Journal of Intercultural Studies 261

exaggerated public ritualised displays of physical touch embracing was often

Journal of Intercultural Studies 263

Conclusion: Longing for Co-presence

In discussing the role of the ethnographer in sharing these ‘‘transnational emotions’’

experience to the analysis of the transnational domestic sphere.

690 An important motivation for increased co-presence is the emotion of missing or

proportion of the Italian and Irish samples, comprises blue-collar workers.

Wilding and Baldock.

Journal of Intercultural Studies 265

Casey, Edward S. Remembering: A Phenomenological Study. Bloomington: Indiana University Press,

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