Sunteți pe pagina 1din 45

Ten Ways to Improve your Relational Skills

with your Spouse


March 6, 2015 / Leave a comment

“Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of
low position. Do not be conceited.” Romans 12:16

1. BE Kind.There is nothing as nice as a cheerful word of greeting!


2. SMILE Often. It takes seventy-two muscles to frown, only fourteen to smile.
3. NAME Use. The sweetest music to anyone’s ear is the sound of one’s own name! So, be
thoughtful with how you call your spouse.
4. BE Helpful. Share the load, do not rely just on your spouse to do it all, help out more
than you are helped!
5. BE Cordial. Speak and act as if everything you do were a genuine pleasure! If it is right
and good, it really should be.
6. BE Interested. Empathy means involvement! Ask, how your day is and then listen with
interest.
7. BE Generous with praiseand cautious with criticism! Do not nag, do not prey upon your
loved ones.
8. BE Considerate with feelings. Feel your spouse’s plight. It will be appreciated.
9. BE Thoughtful of their opinions. There are three sides to a controversy, yours,’ your
spouse and the truth! Do not assume, listen and be open to the real truth.
10. GIVE Service. What counts most in life is who we are in Christ and then what we do for
others! So, be there for one another.

“No good tree bears bad fruit, nor does a bad tree bear good fruit. Each tree is recognized by its
own fruit. People do not pick figs from thornbushes, or grapes from briers. A good man brings
good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the
evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.” Luke 6:43-45
Our Faith Is the most important item we
offer in Marriage
March 1, 2015 / Leave a comment

This title statement is “a must” to know and yield


to, before you can venture into the arena of “authentic relationships.” You have to know whom
you are and what you are in order to do what you are called to do.

In other words, in a Christian marriage, you are saved by faith because of the Wonder about what
Christ has done, then, you are able to communicate that to your spouse, and then to others around
you. All that we are, and have to offer, is what Christ is doing in our lives and together in our
marriage that is shown by our faith. It is faith that will build our relationship with Christ, our
relationship with our spouse and our relationships in our church. And this will be the catalyst of
‘Wonder’ to attract others to our church too. Faith is the prototypical aspect of growing a person,
a marriage and a church God’s way.

Our Lord seeks us to be His “change agents,” the presenters of the wonder of His message,
His Gospel.

The Christian family and each family collectively as the church are the front lines that wage not
just the battle, but also the marketing of Wonder of the message. How we engage in our
relationship to Christ and then impart that to each other will be the biggest testimony to the
message of true faith. This is where the Message of the Gospel the road of life. The Christian
marriage is the display case that presents the marvelous Wonder of Christ’s love through faith. If
the display case is dirty, the Wonder is hard to see. If the case is broken, or if there are other
things occupying the Wonder’s space, the Wonder becomes cloaked and the viewer’s perspective
becomes skewed.

The real authenticity of our Lord, will enable us to build a real authenticity of love and
respect, which will in turn build a “Wondrous Marriage!”

The message we display is the byproduct of our inner journey of faith converging with our
spouse’s inner journey of faith. Then we show others the eternal truths of our Lord, the reality of
life, and the purpose of existence. The Wonder is Christ Himself desires to live and work in our
personal lives, our family lives and then in church and the world! The Wonder is the Christ who
suffered mercilessly, who went through false accusations, sufferings and rejection, not because
He was forced to, but because He chose to on our behalf.
How do your friends and family the people of the church, and the neighborhood, see your
marriage display case? Not that we will be perfect, or even get it right, but we are on that journey
together. How are you displaying the Wonder of His message? How does God see His Wonder in
you? Is there stagnation in your display case, is it filthy, where junk, such as pride and disloyalty,
sit in the place of the Wonder, and where the people cannot see the message, so the message does
not go out? On the other hand, is the display case clean and neat, a display that love, lifts up,
honors, respects and cherishes His most precious Wonder? The message must be lit with vibrant
and growing awe because of who He is.

The Wonder of a Christian marriage is it’s a living message that must be displayed and
used in living and be vibrant.

It sees Christ as who He is, and then responds with gratitude and passion. When it breaks, we
can fix it, but if it stays broke, the display case becomes something else to those around us, a
testimony of faithlessness and pride, brokenness and dysfunction.

Let us not be broken, rather, be loving and respectful as we do our best to be His Wonder to one
another and then to those around us.

Money and Marriage


February 25, 2015 / Leave a comment

Money and marriage go together like ice-cream


and a cone or a car and gasoline or more like this–problems and fighting.

Because financial issues can be so destructive in relationships, you need to know how to make
sure both of you know what money is and how money works. How do we do this? Know that
money is a tool, not the focus. It is important to have a good, biblical concept of how to deal
with budgeting and debt. Know what comes in, know what goes out, and make sure the ‘in’ is
more than the ‘out’. Communicate without judgments and strings or pride to one another.

If your treasure is on earth, your heart will undergo many disappointments, and the storms
of life will overwhelm you and hurt your family. All of the things in life in which you find
your primary joy are suddenly gone!
Can you go through all of your possessions and tell which ones will rot and will not apply to
your Christian growth? How can that list, motivate you to seek what is in Matthew 6:33? Then
what will you have, do and feel (Matthew 6:33; 7:24-27; Luke 12:33-34; Hebrews 10:32-39; 1
Timothy 6:17-19)?

When our focus is on possessions, they become our idols, and we worship them. Our
identity, and personification of who we are, becomes branded by what we have, and not
who we are in Christ (1 John 5:21).

Let’s look at another key word, Fear the LORD means to trust, serve, and worship Him. Money
and things can easily become the priorities in our lives! The choice becomes whether we will
worship the One True God, or be idolaters, following after false gods. Know that our real and
true treasures are imperishable! Make a list of them, and put them in a place that you can see
daily to encourage yourself. Keep in mind that true treasures are not material in nature, so look
to relationships and character (Proverbs 1:7; 3:5; Matthew 6:33; 1 Timothy 6:9-19; 1 Peter 1:3-
5).

You must be able to ask questions, listen, and be vulnerable to reflect, challenge, and address
each other’s views and ideas on budgeting. Do not focus on faults, rather on areas that need
growth. Take it slow and develop your budget first. If you do not do this, then you will be
among the countless relationships in our culture filled with miscommunication, hurt, and misery!

1. Money is not for power and control, it is a tool for effectual living and our Lord’s
service! How can you make this your mindset? How will it improve your family?

Make your budget, but first pray, and pray more and treat each other with respect, dignity, listen
and take breaks, perhaps have fun doing it!

Remember, our real and true treasures are imperishable!

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us
new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an
inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. This inheritance is kept in heaven for you, who
through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be
revealed in the last time. 1 Peter 1:3-5

Remember that the heart of any healthy


relationship is love and respect!
February 1, 2015 / Leave a comment
Do you have a heart for love and respect to
your spouse? If not why not?

A married couple is on the same team; you are not each other’s enemy! So, be willing to see
your spouse as your teammate, and not your rival. In that way, you can avoid seeing the other as
the problem, and focus on the issue and the solution!

What do you need to do to cement and practice this paramount point to build a healthy marriage,
that the heart of any healthy relationship is love and respect?

Remember that the heart of any healthy relationship is love and respect! If you do not get
this, you will not get marriage!

Your marriage is all about grace, that we receive that we must also distill and pass on. How will
you do this?

Sometimes we force marriage to do something it was not designed to do, and we turn this most
intimate and important relationship into a place of loneliness, worry, hurt and strife. We take
what was to be good and turn it into a warzone void of the practice of love, mercy, and our
growth in maturity, but rather hone our weapons of pride, arrogance, condescension, and
contempt, or just withdraw, staying angry and bitter. We model these practices for our children
and expect them to have better lives and marriages when all we’ve really taught them is how not
to do it.

Unanchored stress and disappointments, along with a detachment from looking to God, will
prevent us from seeing His signposts of precepts.

We cannot just expect God to get us through without any effort on our part. To grow, we have to
struggle and work it out. It is the struggle that helps us; it is what builds us and forms us.
Without it, there is no growth or real impacting faith, honest character, genuine patience, or
maturity—and thus, unhealthy relationships.
Don’t play these games. Your marriage and relationships are too precious and valuable to
destroy them with our whims or hurts. Yet, Christians can be some of the most critical and
arrogant people on earth! As Christians, we need to be an example for Him wherever we are, set
ourselves above pettiness, and let God remove our pride!

The Book is out in Amazon!


January 20, 2015 / Leave a comment

And my book is out today, I think this is one of the best ones ever written on the
subject, it is biblical, practiced, true and practical…. and easy to read…

This Is Marriage

…, 20+ years in the making…

“The real authenticity of our Lord, will enable us to build a real authenticity of love and respect,
that will in turn build a “Wondrous Marriage!”

Is the most important thing in a


marriage, love?
January 20, 2015 / Leave a comment

Most people assume that love is the most important thing in a marriage, or the most
important reason to get married!
You will frequently hear people in TV, in the movies, out on the streets of life and even in the
church saying, I do not need to work on love and relationships, it will just happen. And, if not, it
was not meant to be, and I can get out of it if it does not work out.

How sad that philosophy is!

But, when you carefully examine love from the Bible, you will find that it is a choice over and
against any feeling or aspiration of what we may want it to be or mean (Colossians 3:12-17; 1
Thessalonians 4:9-10; 5:8-13).

Love is a choice that also happens in a seemingly magical and metaphysical way, as poets have
tried to explain it throughout the millennias. But, is that it?

The Bible tells us that love is more than a feeling; it has


segments and characters to it. Love is also a choice, a decision that must be perused and worked
on. In our human mind, we may see it as magical, as if it “just happened,” but, without pursuing
its true meaning and character, it will dispel and waste away. So, when we do receive that spark
of love that we cannot explain, to keep that magic, that romance, that spark going requires us to
do something about it.

If we do not work on it, the spark that was once there will vanish as quickly and as suddenly as it
came. It will fade into the night, leaving us in the darkness of the maze of relationships, lost and
confused. The way we keep that flame from blowing out is our understanding and modeling the
character of love. So, as it becomes contagious and spreads, it flames and excites, burns and
grows, so the winds of the ups and downs of a relationship will not blow it out!

God’s love must be our model for life. It must flow into us from Christ, and in return flow out
from us to those around us. God’s love is the ultimate power for the Christian.

Remember; “Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not
arrogant.” (NAS) What love is not is as important as what love is! Be aware that we will be held
accountable and even judged on what we do not do or refuse to see when sin and pride are in the
way (Matt. 23:27; Luke 19:42)!

“Why, we’re in Love”


January 20, 2015 / Leave a comment

If you ask most couples who are thinking about marriage, or who are already engaged, why they
are getting married, they usually will say: “Why, we’re in love.”

It has been through studying the Word, plus, over twenty-five years of pastoral counseling
experience, that has prompted me to question the validity of this motive. Yes, love is essential
and powerful!

However, if that is all you have, you will end up with nothing!

The number one m istake people make when they


date is to look just for love. The number one mistake married couples make is thinking that
their love is all they need. This puts their brains “on hold” from everything else. Yes, love is
putting the precepts of 1 Corinthians 13 into action, but most people, including Christians, do not
even know what real love is!

Choosing a life partner should never be based on love alone. A marriage cannot last on love
alone. This may sound like crazy talk, but think it through. Have you ever seen a relationship
work with just love? No, not for movie or TV stars who have everything going for them, not for
the singers who sing about it, and not even for the Beatles! Because, they do not know what love
is, nor do they really put it into practice.

We do not necessarily fall in love as the love songs and movies proclaim, because, you may well
fall out of it, faster than you fell in it!

If you never choose to make it a commitment, with love, you will never have it, or, if you do,
you will not keep it! Love is a verb; it requires action that is implied for being a verb, action to
do something with it. What are you doing with it? Is it cherishing? Is it respectful? Or? Are the
precepts of 1 Corinthians 13 being put into action with your friends, family, acquaintances, and
your spouse?

If not, what is in the way of that verb action?

Have you ever known some to get married to


someone they did not love?
January 20, 2015 / Leave a comment

Most, if not all, people who get married do it for love, yet, according to most statistical evidence,
fifty percent will divorce in less than five years. The Christian divorce rate is less, about 28%.

So, what happened to the love?

If love is all we need, should not it have worked? Why did it not work? Because, there never was
‘real’ love, they misunderstood what love is, or, they had nothing but love. Perhaps they let that
spark of love flame out in neglect, so that there was a huge vacuum in their relationship!

Love should not be the horse in front of the cart. Love alone cannot influence a relationship.
Love needs to be a result, not a cause, for getting married. Love is the result of a good marriage,
not the fuel to make it. Love is an attitude that is followed by action; when this does not happen,
love will sit and go nowhere.

God’s love must be our model for life. It must flow into us from Christ, and in return flow out
from us to those around us.

God’s love is the ultimate power for the Christian. We are to be fueled and empowered by love
in all situations. Christian love is the turning of our backs to self-concerns, and facing our
neighbors. It is the surrender of our will to His. Because, if love does not take us beyond our self-
interests, then what we have is lust, not love! As the passage of 1 Corinthians 13:3 would say, we
become just a noise that has no reason or purpose.

Our model? Out of true love, God the Father gave us His Son, and the Son gave His life in
replacement for ours. The Son sent the Spirit to save us, and we should be literally overwhelmed-
consumed–with extreme joy and gratitude for what God has done for us.

Is the Love in you?


January 20, 2015 / Leave a comment

The idea of Love


January 20, 2015 / Leave a comment

Love will enable us to appreciate our brothers and sisters in the Lord, and, of course, our
family and others around us.

Love is taking the initiative to build up and meet the needs of others without expecting anything
in return.

Love desires to seek and apply what God has to say. It also runs the full spectrum from
romanticism and the quest for personal satisfaction, to God, and the meaning of life. And, when
you have the wrong idea and definition of love, it will adversely impose on all those areas in
your life. What love is not is as important as what love is!

The opposite is Hate, Lust, and Disgust. It covers the areas from disliking people who are
different to deliberately seeking malice and destruction of what the Lord has for us!Not having
real love will leave you empty and alone. Lust is not just the opposite it is the counterfeit!

(John 13:1; 15:13; 1 Corinthians 13:3; Galatians 5:22-23; 1 John)

Is real Love in your marriage?


Here is how you can find out. Take a careful look at this character and fruit of love from God’s
most precious Word by examining the passages below. Now ask yourself:

1.How do I exhibit Love in my daily life?

2.What can I do to develop a more loving attitude?

3.What blocks love from being expressed in me?

4.How can I make love function better, stronger, and faster, even in times of uncertainty and
stress?

Search for:

Recent Posts
 Forgiveness is Complete
 Be Careful with Blame
 Forgiveness in Marriage PIV
 What is Faithfulness in Marriage? PII
 Forgiveness in Marriage PIII

Recent Comments
basic details on BEWARE OF THE DOGHOUSE!

KINDLE BOOKS on This Is Marriage” is now out i…

Archives
 January 2016
 July 2015
 June 2015
 May 2015
 March 2015
 February 2015
 January 2015
 July 2014
 May 2014
 April 2014

Categories
 Character
 Forgiveness
 Healthy Marriage
 Love
 Love and Marriage
 Marriage Skills
 Money and marriage
 Non Sequitur
 The Book
 Uncategorized

Meta
 Register
 Log in
 Entries RSS
 Comments RSS
 WordPress.com
Ten Ways to Improve your Relational Skills
with your Spouse
March 6, 2015 / Leave a comment

“Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of
low position. Do not be conceited.” Romans 12:16

1. BE Kind.There is nothing as nice as a cheerful word of greeting!


2. SMILE Often. It takes seventy-two muscles to frown, only fourteen to smile.
3. NAME Use. The sweetest music to anyone’s ear is the sound of one’s own name! So, be
thoughtful with how you call your spouse.
4. BE Helpful. Share the load, do not rely just on your spouse to do it all, help out more
than you are helped!
5. BE Cordial. Speak and act as if everything you do were a genuine pleasure! If it is right
and good, it really should be.
6. BE Interested. Empathy means involvement! Ask, how your day is and then listen with
interest.
7. BE Generous with praiseand cautious with criticism! Do not nag, do not prey upon your
loved ones.
8. BE Considerate with feelings. Feel your spouse’s plight. It will be appreciated.
9. BE Thoughtful of their opinions. There are three sides to a controversy, yours,’ your
spouse and the truth! Do not assume, listen and be open to the real truth.
10. GIVE Service. What counts most in life is who we are in Christ and then what we do for
others! So, be there for one another.

“No good tree bears bad fruit, nor does a bad tree bear good fruit. Each tree is recognized by its
own fruit. People do not pick figs from thornbushes, or grapes from briers. A good man brings
good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the
evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.” Luke 6:43-45
Our Faith Is the most important item we
offer in Marriage
March 1, 2015 / Leave a comment

This title statement is “a must” to know and yield


to, before you can venture into the arena of “authentic relationships.” You have to know whom
you are and what you are in order to do what you are called to do.

In other words, in a Christian marriage, you are saved by faith because of the Wonder about what
Christ has done, then, you are able to communicate that to your spouse, and then to others around
you. All that we are, and have to offer, is what Christ is doing in our lives and together in our
marriage that is shown by our faith. It is faith that will build our relationship with Christ, our
relationship with our spouse and our relationships in our church. And this will be the catalyst of
‘Wonder’ to attract others to our church too. Faith is the prototypical aspect of growing a person,
a marriage and a church God’s way.

Our Lord seeks us to be His “change agents,” the presenters of the wonder of His message,
His Gospel.

The Christian family and each family collectively as the church are the front lines that wage not
just the battle, but also the marketing of Wonder of the message. How we engage in our
relationship to Christ and then impart that to each other will be the biggest testimony to the
message of true faith. This is where the Message of the Gospel the road of life. The Christian
marriage is the display case that presents the marvelous Wonder of Christ’s love through faith. If
the display case is dirty, the Wonder is hard to see. If the case is broken, or if there are other
things occupying the Wonder’s space, the Wonder becomes cloaked and the viewer’s perspective
becomes skewed.

The real authenticity of our Lord, will enable us to build a real authenticity of love and
respect, which will in turn build a “Wondrous Marriage!”

The message we display is the byproduct of our inner journey of faith converging with our
spouse’s inner journey of faith. Then we show others the eternal truths of our Lord, the reality of
life, and the purpose of existence. The Wonder is Christ Himself desires to live and work in our
personal lives, our family lives and then in church and the world! The Wonder is the Christ who
suffered mercilessly, who went through false accusations, sufferings and rejection, not because
He was forced to, but because He chose to on our behalf.
How do your friends and family the people of the church, and the neighborhood, see your
marriage display case? Not that we will be perfect, or even get it right, but we are on that journey
together. How are you displaying the Wonder of His message? How does God see His Wonder in
you? Is there stagnation in your display case, is it filthy, where junk, such as pride and disloyalty,
sit in the place of the Wonder, and where the people cannot see the message, so the message does
not go out? On the other hand, is the display case clean and neat, a display that love, lifts up,
honors, respects and cherishes His most precious Wonder? The message must be lit with vibrant
and growing awe because of who He is.

The Wonder of a Christian marriage is it’s a living message that must be displayed and
used in living and be vibrant.

It sees Christ as who He is, and then responds with gratitude and passion. When it breaks, we
can fix it, but if it stays broke, the display case becomes something else to those around us, a
testimony of faithlessness and pride, brokenness and dysfunction.

Let us not be broken, rather, be loving and respectful as we do our best to be His Wonder to one
another and then to those around us.

Money and Marriage


February 25, 2015 / Leave a comment

Money and marriage go together like ice-cream


and a cone or a car and gasoline or more like this–problems and fighting.

Because financial issues can be so destructive in relationships, you need to know how to make
sure both of you know what money is and how money works. How do we do this? Know that
money is a tool, not the focus. It is important to have a good, biblical concept of how to deal
with budgeting and debt. Know what comes in, know what goes out, and make sure the ‘in’ is
more than the ‘out’. Communicate without judgments and strings or pride to one another.

If your treasure is on earth, your heart will undergo many disappointments, and the storms
of life will overwhelm you and hurt your family. All of the things in life in which you find
your primary joy are suddenly gone!
Can you go through all of your possessions and tell which ones will rot and will not apply to
your Christian growth? How can that list, motivate you to seek what is in Matthew 6:33? Then
what will you have, do and feel (Matthew 6:33; 7:24-27; Luke 12:33-34; Hebrews 10:32-39; 1
Timothy 6:17-19)?

When our focus is on possessions, they become our idols, and we worship them. Our
identity, and personification of who we are, becomes branded by what we have, and not
who we are in Christ (1 John 5:21).

Let’s look at another key word, Fear the LORD means to trust, serve, and worship Him. Money
and things can easily become the priorities in our lives! The choice becomes whether we will
worship the One True God, or be idolaters, following after false gods. Know that our real and
true treasures are imperishable! Make a list of them, and put them in a place that you can see
daily to encourage yourself. Keep in mind that true treasures are not material in nature, so look
to relationships and character (Proverbs 1:7; 3:5; Matthew 6:33; 1 Timothy 6:9-19; 1 Peter 1:3-
5).

You must be able to ask questions, listen, and be vulnerable to reflect, challenge, and address
each other’s views and ideas on budgeting. Do not focus on faults, rather on areas that need
growth. Take it slow and develop your budget first. If you do not do this, then you will be
among the countless relationships in our culture filled with miscommunication, hurt, and misery!

1. Money is not for power and control, it is a tool for effectual living and our Lord’s
service! How can you make this your mindset? How will it improve your family?

Make your budget, but first pray, and pray more and treat each other with respect, dignity, listen
and take breaks, perhaps have fun doing it!

Remember, our real and true treasures are imperishable!

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us
new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an
inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. This inheritance is kept in heaven for you, who
through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be
revealed in the last time. 1 Peter 1:3-5

Remember that the heart of any healthy


relationship is love and respect!
February 1, 2015 / Leave a comment
Do you have a heart for love and respect to
your spouse? If not why not?

A married couple is on the same team; you are not each other’s enemy! So, be willing to see
your spouse as your teammate, and not your rival. In that way, you can avoid seeing the other as
the problem, and focus on the issue and the solution!

What do you need to do to cement and practice this paramount point to build a healthy marriage,
that the heart of any healthy relationship is love and respect?

Remember that the heart of any healthy relationship is love and respect! If you do not get
this, you will not get marriage!

Your marriage is all about grace, that we receive that we must also distill and pass on. How will
you do this?

Sometimes we force marriage to do something it was not designed to do, and we turn this most
intimate and important relationship into a place of loneliness, worry, hurt and strife. We take
what was to be good and turn it into a warzone void of the practice of love, mercy, and our
growth in maturity, but rather hone our weapons of pride, arrogance, condescension, and
contempt, or just withdraw, staying angry and bitter. We model these practices for our children
and expect them to have better lives and marriages when all we’ve really taught them is how not
to do it.

Unanchored stress and disappointments, along with a detachment from looking to God, will
prevent us from seeing His signposts of precepts.

We cannot just expect God to get us through without any effort on our part. To grow, we have to
struggle and work it out. It is the struggle that helps us; it is what builds us and forms us.
Without it, there is no growth or real impacting faith, honest character, genuine patience, or
maturity—and thus, unhealthy relationships.
Don’t play these games. Your marriage and relationships are too precious and valuable to
destroy them with our whims or hurts. Yet, Christians can be some of the most critical and
arrogant people on earth! As Christians, we need to be an example for Him wherever we are, set
ourselves above pettiness, and let God remove our pride!

The Book is out in Amazon!


January 20, 2015 / Leave a comment

And my book is out today, I think this is one of the best ones ever written on the
subject, it is biblical, practiced, true and practical…. and easy to read…

This Is Marriage

…, 20+ years in the making…

“The real authenticity of our Lord, will enable us to build a real authenticity of love and respect,
that will in turn build a “Wondrous Marriage!”

Is the most important thing in a


marriage, love?
January 20, 2015 / Leave a comment

Most people assume that love is the most important thing in a marriage, or the most
important reason to get married!
You will frequently hear people in TV, in the movies, out on the streets of life and even in the
church saying, I do not need to work on love and relationships, it will just happen. And, if not, it
was not meant to be, and I can get out of it if it does not work out.

How sad that philosophy is!

But, when you carefully examine love from the Bible, you will find that it is a choice over and
against any feeling or aspiration of what we may want it to be or mean (Colossians 3:12-17; 1
Thessalonians 4:9-10; 5:8-13).

Love is a choice that also happens in a seemingly magical and metaphysical way, as poets have
tried to explain it throughout the millennias. But, is that it?

The Bible tells us that love is more than a feeling; it has


segments and characters to it. Love is also a choice, a decision that must be perused and worked
on. In our human mind, we may see it as magical, as if it “just happened,” but, without pursuing
its true meaning and character, it will dispel and waste away. So, when we do receive that spark
of love that we cannot explain, to keep that magic, that romance, that spark going requires us to
do something about it.

If we do not work on it, the spark that was once there will vanish as quickly and as suddenly as it
came. It will fade into the night, leaving us in the darkness of the maze of relationships, lost and
confused. The way we keep that flame from blowing out is our understanding and modeling the
character of love. So, as it becomes contagious and spreads, it flames and excites, burns and
grows, so the winds of the ups and downs of a relationship will not blow it out!

God’s love must be our model for life. It must flow into us from Christ, and in return flow out
from us to those around us. God’s love is the ultimate power for the Christian.

Remember; “Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not
arrogant.” (NAS) What love is not is as important as what love is! Be aware that we will be held
accountable and even judged on what we do not do or refuse to see when sin and pride are in the
way (Matt. 23:27; Luke 19:42)!

“Why, we’re in Love”


January 20, 2015 / Leave a comment

If you ask most couples who are thinking about marriage, or who are already engaged, why they
are getting married, they usually will say: “Why, we’re in love.”

It has been through studying the Word, plus, over twenty-five years of pastoral counseling
experience, that has prompted me to question the validity of this motive. Yes, love is essential
and powerful!

However, if that is all you have, you will end up with nothing!

The number one m istake people make when they


date is to look just for love. The number one mistake married couples make is thinking that
their love is all they need. This puts their brains “on hold” from everything else. Yes, love is
putting the precepts of 1 Corinthians 13 into action, but most people, including Christians, do not
even know what real love is!

Choosing a life partner should never be based on love alone. A marriage cannot last on love
alone. This may sound like crazy talk, but think it through. Have you ever seen a relationship
work with just love? No, not for movie or TV stars who have everything going for them, not for
the singers who sing about it, and not even for the Beatles! Because, they do not know what love
is, nor do they really put it into practice.

We do not necessarily fall in love as the love songs and movies proclaim, because, you may well
fall out of it, faster than you fell in it!

If you never choose to make it a commitment, with love, you will never have it, or, if you do,
you will not keep it! Love is a verb; it requires action that is implied for being a verb, action to
do something with it. What are you doing with it? Is it cherishing? Is it respectful? Or? Are the
precepts of 1 Corinthians 13 being put into action with your friends, family, acquaintances, and
your spouse?

If not, what is in the way of that verb action?

Have you ever known some to get married to


someone they did not love?
January 20, 2015 / Leave a comment

Most, if not all, people who get married do it for love, yet, according to most statistical evidence,
fifty percent will divorce in less than five years. The Christian divorce rate is less, about 28%.

So, what happened to the love?

If love is all we need, should not it have worked? Why did it not work? Because, there never was
‘real’ love, they misunderstood what love is, or, they had nothing but love. Perhaps they let that
spark of love flame out in neglect, so that there was a huge vacuum in their relationship!

Love should not be the horse in front of the cart. Love alone cannot influence a relationship.
Love needs to be a result, not a cause, for getting married. Love is the result of a good marriage,
not the fuel to make it. Love is an attitude that is followed by action; when this does not happen,
love will sit and go nowhere.

God’s love must be our model for life. It must flow into us from Christ, and in return flow out
from us to those around us.

God’s love is the ultimate power for the Christian. We are to be fueled and empowered by love
in all situations. Christian love is the turning of our backs to self-concerns, and facing our
neighbors. It is the surrender of our will to His. Because, if love does not take us beyond our self-
interests, then what we have is lust, not love! As the passage of 1 Corinthians 13:3 would say, we
become just a noise that has no reason or purpose.

Our model? Out of true love, God the Father gave us His Son, and the Son gave His life in
replacement for ours. The Son sent the Spirit to save us, and we should be literally overwhelmed-
consumed–with extreme joy and gratitude for what God has done for us.

Is the Love in you?


January 20, 2015 / Leave a comment

The idea of Love


January 20, 2015 / Leave a comment

Love will enable us to appreciate our brothers and sisters in the Lord, and, of course, our
family and others around us.

Love is taking the initiative to build up and meet the needs of others without expecting anything
in return.

Love desires to seek and apply what God has to say. It also runs the full spectrum from
romanticism and the quest for personal satisfaction, to God, and the meaning of life. And, when
you have the wrong idea and definition of love, it will adversely impose on all those areas in
your life. What love is not is as important as what love is!

The opposite is Hate, Lust, and Disgust. It covers the areas from disliking people who are
different to deliberately seeking malice and destruction of what the Lord has for us!Not having
real love will leave you empty and alone. Lust is not just the opposite it is the counterfeit!

(John 13:1; 15:13; 1 Corinthians 13:3; Galatians 5:22-23; 1 John)

Is real Love in your marriage?


Here is how you can find out. Take a careful look at this character and fruit of love from God’s
most precious Word by examining the passages below. Now ask yourself:

1.How do I exhibit Love in my daily life?

2.What can I do to develop a more loving attitude?

3.What blocks love from being expressed in me?

4.How can I make love function better, stronger, and faster, even in times of uncertainty and
stress?

Search for:

Recent Posts
 Forgiveness is Complete
 Be Careful with Blame
 Forgiveness in Marriage PIV
 What is Faithfulness in Marriage? PII
 Forgiveness in Marriage PIII

Recent Comments
basic details on BEWARE OF THE DOGHOUSE!

KINDLE BOOKS on This Is Marriage” is now out i…

Archives
 January 2016
 July 2015
 June 2015
 May 2015
 March 2015
 February 2015
 January 2015
 July 2014
 May 2014
 April 2014

Categories
 Character
 Forgiveness
 Healthy Marriage
 Love
 Love and Marriage
 Marriage Skills
 Money and marriage
 Non Sequitur
 The Book
 Uncategorized

Meta
 Register
 Log in
 Entries RSS
 Comments RSS
 WordPress.com

Bible Studies
How to Memorize Scripture Part I
By Dr. Richard J. Krejcir

How to Memorize Scripture Part I

Deuteronomy 6:4-9; 11:18-21; Psalm 63: 1-8; 119: 9, 11, 72; Matthew 4:4; Philippians 3:10; Col. 3:16; 2
Timothy 3:16; Hebrews 4:12; James 1:21-25; 1 Peter 2:2; 3:15

I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you. Psalm 119:11

Nothing in our Christian life is as important or compares to the value of learning God's Word and
then incorporating His precepts into our lives. Thus, memorizing a passage of Scripture is an essential
way not only to know His Word, but to know and grow in our Lord and Savior. Yet, many Christians have
neglected, even negated this discipline, including me on occasions. We desire the quick way; give me the
easiest shortest plan to be a Christian. I am only interested in what is convenient, easy and hassle free.
We want something to do that takes little to no work and then we may decide to do it, if we feel like it.
Yet, memorizing the Scriptures takes our time, effort, and work; thus, we usually just will not do it. But,
consider this: does not God, who saved us and provides for us deserve our best? Doesn't He deserve our
best attention and mindset, things we give to others that are so much less important and even fleeing?
It is my endeavor here to help persuade you of the importance and veracity of memorizing Scripture,
and some tips I have learned over the years to help you do it.

Why We Tend Not to Memorize Scripture

I will obey your decrees; do not utterly forsake me. Psalm 119:8

We can come up with all kinds of reasons why we should not or need not
memorize Scripture. Perhaps, you are saying or thinking, "I can't because I have a bad
memory," or "I just do not have time;" "I have tried this before and I could not do it," or
"why should I?", or "I am not a pastor or in leadership." Someone told me once, "I do not
need to because Jesus told me I do not have to." I can tell you that I do have a bad
memory, and I certainly do not have the time while I pastor, travel, run an international
ministry, and then there is my precious new baby. And, I can also certainty tell you that
Jesus would never, ever tell you something that contradicts His Word. We are called by
God Himself, even commanded to learn, know, ponder on, and memorize Scripture
(Josh 1:8; Psalm 1; 15; Is. 8:12; 1 Peter 3: 13-22; 4:12)!

Yet, we tend to not do what He has called-even commanded us to do! We are


struggle with this working out of our salvation as described in Philippians 2. We need to
work on what hinders us from Christ. I am naturally a lazy person and I would much
rather read a "readers digest" version of something-to just get the crux of the matter and
move on to something more fun, or just sit and do nothing but watch a movie or read a
magazine. Yet, God has called me to pastor and research, which takes much more
effort, time, and work than I naturally desire to do. Thus, I have had to learn to discipline
myself, practice it, and learn to stick with it, even when I would rather be doing
something less intensive or more fun. Because I want to grow in Christ and share with
others what I am learning, I have had to learn it first. And, that is what a pastor should
be doing, even when we would rather play golf or go fishing (which we can do too, just
not all of the time). I had to learn the importance of my call and respond to Christ with
my best efforts, my obedience out of love and gratitude so I could be my best and follow
His lead.

The effort to memorize Scripture is something all Christians should be doing. It


takes time and hard work, but we are to do this with our best efforts and our obedience
out of love and gratitude for Who He is and what He has done for us. But, this is not to
be a labor of pain or a work of strife that we dread; rather, it is a wondrous and glorious
journey because we are getting to know Him more deeply! The memorization of
Scripture is not something that engrosses us; it is not something that we do all of the
time, or even a majority of our devotional life. Our study, devotional reading, and prayer
should take the "lions share" of our efforts, but memorizing must have its place and be a
part of our Christian life and walk. It can also be adventurous and fun!

Why We are Called to Memorize Scripture

Give me understanding, and I will keep your law and obey it with all my heart. Psalm 119:34

God calls us to have His Words and promises written in our hearts! The way to spiritual maturity
and the glory of our reward is not in finding shortcuts, but exercising temperance and commitment
through learning, experience, and overcoming adversities. It is a long and difficult process (Acts 14:22;
Rom. 2:7). The question is, How can you make memorizing Scripture a reality in your life? See what God
Himself has to say; read any or all of these passages below, and in prayer, go over them and match them
to these bullet points and ask Him how you are doing with this. By the way, here is the first set of Bible
memorization verses for you to practice from:

Deut. 6:4-9; 11:18-21; Josh 1:8; Psalm 37:31; 63: 1-8; 119: 9-11, 72; 105, Prov. 6:20-22; Matt. 4:1-11;
John 4:24; 15:7; 17:17; Acts 18:28; 20:32; Rom 12:1-2; Phil. 3:10; 4:6-7; Eph. 4:14; 5:17; Col. 3:16; 1
Thess. 2:13; 5:11; 2 Tim. 2:15; 3:16; Heb. 4:12; James 1:21-25; 1 Pet. 2:2; 3:15

The primary reason we memorize Scripture is because we are called and commanded to learn
God's Word so we can learn more about Him, what He has done, and what we can do to lead a great
Christian life. We are called to meditate on His Word. Have you responded to this call?

 Knowing God's Word helps us be better at studying the Bible.

 Knowing God's Word helps fabricate and shape our spiritual growth.

 Knowing God's Word helps us experience and worship God.

 Knowing God's Word helps us know and respond to His precepts and call.

 Knowing God's Word helps us realize that God's Word transforms our minds to think in His ways and
live our life better in Him.

 Knowing God's Word makes it easier for the Holy Spirit to more powerfully guide us!

 Knowing God's Word stimulates our intimacy and prayer life with Him.

 Knowing God's Word gives us useful, effective, and effectual knowledge of the Bible.

 Knowing God's Word gives us practical wisdom, guidance, and knowledge for life!

 Knowing God's Word helps God use us more and more powerfully.

 Knowing God's Word helps us in the sharing of our faith.

 Knowing God's Word gives us success in dealing with sin and temptations.

 Knowing God's Word gives us confidence in witnessing.

 Knowing God's Word equips us to be able to help guide others.

 Knowing God's Word helps encourage the spiritual growth in others lives.
 Knowing God's Word helps us to overcome life's problems and obstacles.

 Knowing God's Word helps us be content and at peace.

 Knowing God's Word helps us to discern false teachings.

Have you responded to His call?

The Basic Plan

How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word. Psalm 119:9

The "nitty-gritty" for ease in memorizing is to simply select a short passage-a verse or two. Pray,
read it, and then read the chapter in an easy-to-understand translation to see it in context. Then re-read
your passage at least ten times in the translation you are using, such as the KJV, NASB, NKJV, RSV, NIV or
the ESV. Then, write it out on a small card and re-read it at least ten times. Put it away for a few hours or
a day, then pick up the card and re-read it aloud several times. You should have it memorized after a
week! It does take a little effort, but it is not as hard as most people think. There is no reason to dread
or stress in order to know God's Word.

The simple basic plan:

1. Select a short passage to memorize.


2. Pray over it.
3. Read it.
4. Read the chapter to know its context.
5. Re-read the passage at least ten times.
6. Write it out on a small card.
7. Go over your card at least ten times, reading it out loud.
8. Put it away and in a few hours or a day, pick up the card and re-read it several times. In
a few days, you should have it memorized!

The Big Tip


Now, to make it even easier and more fun, do the above and also use a recording device such as
a tape recorder, MP3 recorder, or a smart parrot. This is what I do because I have a terrible memory and
learning disabilities I have had to overcome. So, for me, this was the worst of the worst of my stress and
dread, but I learned to do it and have fun doing it. By the way, this is a phenomenal memorizing method
for any literature, notes, text, readings, etc. Read it, record it, and then play it back anywhere you are-
while driving, at the mall, or wherever. You can do this with your notes, study material, information you
have to memorize, even terms and words for science, a foreign language, or math formulas. I have
found this one of the best ways to study, and it works!

The key to memorization is this: STUDY! REVIEW! and PERSEVERE! Repetition is the
best way to engrave the verses into your mind.

What Do I Memorize?

Blessed are they who keep his statutes and seek him with all their heart. Psalm 119:2

Start with these passages: Deut. 6:4-9; 11:18-21; Josh. 1:8; Psalm 37:31; 63:1-8; 119: 9-11, 72, 105; Prov.
6:20-22; Matt. 4:1-11; John 4:24; 15:7; 17:17; Acts 18:28; 20:32; Rom 12:1-2; Phil. 3:10; 4:6-7; Eph. 4:14;
5:17; Col. 3:16; 1 Thess. 2:13; 5:11; 2 Tim. 2:15; 3:16; Heb. 4:12; James 1:21-25; 1 Pet. 2:2; 3:15.

Here is a guide I used when I was on Staff with Campus Crusade in the 80s:

Scripture Memory Verses

Christ-Centered

New Creation 2 Cor. 5:17 Col. 2:6 Col. 2:9,10

Christ Centered John 15:5 Phil. 1:6 Gal. 2:20

Word Centered Matt. 4:4 Acts 20:32 Col. 3:16


Prayer Centered John 16:24 Matt. 21:22 1 John 5:14,15

Obedience John 14:21 John 15:10,14 Heb. 5:8

Witnessing 1 John 1:3 Acts 1:8 1 Pet. 3:15

Salvation

Fact of Sin Rom. 3:23 John 3:19 Rom. 3:12

Penalty of Sin Rom. 6:23 Heb. 9:27 Rom. 5:12

Penalty Paid Rom. 5:8 1 Pet. 3:18 1 Cor. 15:3,4

Salvation a Gift Eph. 2:8,9 Rom. 3:24 Titus 3:5

Must Receive John 1:12 Rev. 3:20 Rom. 10:9,10

Assurance 1 John 5:11,12 John 5:24 1 John 5:13

Lord's Promises

Forgiveness 1 John 1:9 Eph. 1:7 1 John 2:1,2

Comfort 1 Pet. 5:7 2 Cor. 1:3,4 Matt. 11:28

Victory 1 Cor. 10:13 1 John 5:4,5 2 Cor. 2:14

Rewards 1 Cor. 15:58 2 Cor. 5:10 2 Tim. 4:8

Inheritance Rom. 8:16,17 1 Pet. 1:3,4 Titus 3:7

Second Coming 1 Thess. 4:16,17 Titus 2:12,13 John 14:2,3

Commands

Follow Christ Luke 9:23 1 John 2:6 1 Pet 2:21


Separate from World 2 Cor. 6:17,18 Rom. 12:2 1 John 2:15,16

Strong in Temptation Jam. 1:12 1 Cor. 16:13 1 Pet. 1:6,7

Endure Suffering Phil 1:29 1 Pet. 4:12,13 Heb. 12:3

Spiritual Warfare Eph. 6:10,11 1 Tim. 6:11,12 2 Tim. 2:3,4

Go John 20:21 2 Cor. 5:19,20 Mark 16:15

Spiritual Fruit

Love John 13:34,35 1 John 3:23 Gal. 5:22,23

Joy John 15:11 Phil. 4:4 2 Cor. 6:10

Peace John 14:27 John 16:33 Phil. 4:6,7

Patience Heb. 10:36 James 1:2-4 1 Pet. 2:20

Faith Acts 27:25 Heb. 11:6 Rom. 4:20,21

Humility Phil. 2:3,4 Matt. 20:26,27 1 Pet. 5:5,6

God's Word

Inspiration 2 Tim. 3:16 2 Pet. 1:20,21 1 Thess. 2:13

Read It Rev. 1:3 1 Tim. 4:13 Deut. 17:19

Study It Acts 17:11 2 Tim. 2:15 Ps. 119:9,11

Love It Ps. 138:2 Jer. 15:16 Job 23:12

Meditate on It Ps. 1:2,3 Josh. 1:8 Ps. 119:148

Hear It Rom. 10:17 James 1:22 Luke 11:28

From: Campus Crusade for Christ International


Let Us Be Doers of His Mighty Word!

Check out some passages that tell us that discipleship and mentoring are not an option, but a command:
Matthew 28:16-20; Romans 12; 1 Corinthians 12; Galatians 6:1-10; Mark 1:35 - 2:12. We must follow out
of obedience, and mentor in a multigenerational lifestyle, caring for the total person. This will move us
from just playing church to really being a church.

Richard Joseph Krejcir is the Founder and Director of Into Thy Word Ministries, a missions and discipling
ministry. He is the author of several books including Into Thy Word, A Field Guide to Healthy
Relationships and Net-Work. He is also a pastor, teacher, and speaker. He is a graduate of Fuller
Theological Seminary in Pasadena, California (M.Div.) and holds a Doctor of Philosophy in Practical
Theology from London (Ph.D). He has garnered over 20 years of pastoral ministry experience, mostly in
youth ministry, including serving as a Church Growth Consultant.

© 1984, 2006 R. J. Krejcir Ph.D., Into Thy Word Ministries www.intothyword.org

Related Articles • More Articles


The Main Goal of Bible Study

Unfortunately a lot of Christians think that all we have to do is read the Bible, and do what it says, and
there is nothing to interpret. Or they will react against the educated "professional" Christian who is a
teacher, scholar or pastor.

ATTITUDE The prelude to effective study and LIFE!

Do you call yourself an expert on receivership? You probably say no way! But do you live your life that
way. That is having a "me first" identity, always placing the emphases on the "I" and "Me". If only I... If it
could go this way for me...Then I could....

How to be a Capable Bible Student


The capable Bible student is rooted and grounded in the spiritual disciplines of the faith, whose drive is
their passionate love relationship to the Lordship of Christ. And what flows out of it is the desire to love
God's people, to herd them with love into the pastures of maturity.

 Bible Study Methods


 Bible Reading Plans
 Bible Studies
 Discipleship
 Church Leadership
 Schaeffer Institute
 Bible Study Articles
 Youth Ministry
 Spanish
 Bible Study Forums
 Bible Study Aids
 Links

Get Connected

Latest News

New: Year End Repot

ITWyearend2015.pdf

ITWyearend2014.pdf

Bible Reading Spreadsheet

We have a wondrous new tool to help you in your Bible reading efforts!

See our U-Tube on how it works!

A Bible reading checklist in "Excel" that keeps track of your progress with all kinds of cool graphs and
tracking features along with stats on words, verses, encouraging facts, etc. This is also a fund-raising
opportunity for us that we think could be a successful addition to your church or ministry spiritual arsenal.
We need your Partnership!

Click here to Donate!

ITW Financial Challenge

We are a ministry making a difference for the Kingdom of God, and...

A great way to raise funds for our ministry and you can make money too!

Help us Build a Pasadena Schaeffer Center!

It is a community of committed believers serving the Lord in a center for research and practicum.

New Funding Project! RealEstateProject.pdf

ITW Radio Opportunity We as a ministry have a wonderful opportunity before us and we need your
partnership!

Growing in Christ is the key to growing a faith, a family and a Fellowship!


Print Version
Friendly

Save this on Delicious Share on Tumblr

View Site Map

Recommended Books!
This is Marriage

The New Exodus

How to Build Your Faith to Share Your Faith


Building Healthy Relationships

Into Thy Word

All About Small Groups


Bible Studies
How to Memorize Scripture Part II
By Dr. Richard J. Krejcir

How to Memorize Scripture Part II

Deuteronomy 6:4-9; 11:18-21; Psalm 63: 1-8; 119: 9, 11, 72; Matthew 4:4; Philippians 3:10; Col. 3:16; 2
Timothy 3:16; Hebrews 4:12; James 1:21-25; 1 Peter 2:2; 3:15

I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you. Psalm 119:11

Tools, Steps, and Tips to Help you Memorize Scripture

Praise be to you, O LORD; teach me your decrees. Psalm 119:12

Start with the proper approach-that of prayer and reverence before our Holy God. Have an
honest desire to know Him more fully and with a good attitude based on growing in Christ rather than
seeking just what you want. Our minds must be clear and childlike before Him, because, when you read
His Word, you are standing before the face of God-the Holy God! So, adjust to a good attitude and
reverence for God and His Word. It is simply not enough to know what you want to do-you have to
know the right way to do it. It is like following directions to build something like a model; when we use
the directions, we build it right. When we throw them away, we get it wrong and our efforts are wasted.
If we do not have the right approach and attitude, we do not get much out of God's Word, because our
will gets in the way of His!

First: Pray

I seek you with all my heart; do not let me stray from your commands. Psalm 119:10
This is the essential, first step to always, always starting anything-especially the memorization of
Scripture and communication with God! Ask God to open your eyes so you can be confident and be able
to do this with ease, passion, and impact (Psalm 119:18).

 Pray and ask God to help you memorize; ask Him for the confidence and perseverance to do so.

 Ask Him for His blessing and be positive that He will enable you to do it.

 To grow in Christ, we must desire to be with Him and to learn from Him. (Phil. 3:10; 1 John 1 :3-4)

 Prayer engages us with Christ and helps us in our best efforts,

 True obedience comes out of our love and gratitude for who He is and what He has done.

 Have confidence that Christ is working in you!

Second: Select

I delight in your decrees; I will not neglect your word. Psalm 119:16

Choose a short passage-a verse or two that you wish to memorize. Either start with our
recommendations below or with what your pastor or mentor suggests.

 If this seems too much, then begin with one of the simple, one-verse passages.

 Choose a verse that speaks to and/or touches you.

 Never consider this as a chore or burdensome; it is our joy to know our Lord more!

 The point is to do it. Do not jump into large passages or tough passages; get to know the basic
passages in the Gospels or Psalms first!

 Discover what our Lord has to say to you!

 Think Big - Think Smart, not small or with an "I can't' or "I have to"' attitude; rather have a will to do
it - our identity is in Christ.
 Remember the context! See the whole picture of what is going on. The reason most people do not
get it is because they do not get in it!

 Set aside time and be consistent; try at least 5-10 minutes a day to practice your Bible memory.

 You can easily memorize one to two passages a week.

 Do not be overwhelmed! Yes, memorization looks ominous and un-climbable, but you have to just
start. Just as when putting together a big puzzle-start with what you recognize, do it one piece at a
time, and then one day it will be done!

 Keep in mind why you are doing this! Read Psalm 119 and do a study on verses 9-16.

 Remember, we are called to memorize Scripture!

Third: Read it

I meditate on your precepts and consider your ways. Psalm 119:15

Read the verse that you have selected and then read the book and chapter to know its context.
Then, read the verses, verse-by-verse in order, and write down what you see and learn. Then, you will
be amazed at how much more you will pick up!

 Remember to read the verse in its context.

 Study the passage first to better understand what you are memorizing and to increase your
understanding of what the verse means. Do not assume anything; do the research and study. Many
Christians think they know something when in fact they do not, or at least not well enough.

 Read your passage in another translation or a paraphrase. If you do not know what something
means, look it up in a good commentary or Bible Dictionary.

 State the reference of the passage before and after, such as John 3:16.

 Make sure to say the passage accurately.

Forth: Re-read
With my lips I recount all the laws that come from your mouth. Psalm119:13

Commit your verse to memory by reading and rereading it. It is best to read the passage you
want to memorize at least ten times in your translation of choice. If you are using the King James (this is
great to do and my personal favorite for memorization), don't forget to also read it in a translation you
can understand with more clarity.

 Read and review it; say it out loud several times.

 Then, read the passage several times a day for one week. Then slow it down and read it once or
twice a day for a week; then, to keep it memorized recite it once a month.

 Make a prayer out of the verse; pray to God, incorporating the verse and its precepts into your
prayer.

 Meditate on the passage-this means to reflect and ponder on it.

 Do an Inductive study on it.

 Break the verse down into its natural phrases; comas are your clue, and do a section at a time.

 Emphasize with your voice the key words. Try to stress certain words and phrases with different
pitch and tones of our voice, like actors and public readers do.

 Study at times when your biological clock is active, i.e. if you are a morning person, study in the
morning more than in the evening. (Take your temperature every hour on the hour throughout the
day and chart it. Do this 2 or 3 times in a week; chart the times your temperature is highest and
study hardest at those times.)

 Think positively and affirm yourself. A negative attitude will get you just that...a negative response
from Scripture and a disconnection from what God is seeking to teach you and use you in others'
lives as well. A positive attitude will also help you achieve what Christ has for you and others in your
life, too.

 Use memorizing techniques like making up stories to help you remember, or tie what you are
learning to something else that you know as a synonym.

 While you read, say it out in a loud voice!

 Imagine yourself as a participant-as if it is your story or as if you are there.


 Let God speak to you; the main goal is to know our Lord better, not just to gain more knowledge!

 Try to create a jingle or write a song!

Fifth: Write it Out

I hold fast to your statutes, O LORD; do not let me be put to shame. Psalm 119:31

Write out your verse on a small index card or flash card along with the passage reference. Then,
use your card as a memory tool to look at, and re-read it at least 10 times. Put it away for a few hours,
then pick up the card and re-read it aloud several times.

 How to review with 3x5 cards: study in short periods, i.e. five to 10 minutes at a time, and then go
on to something else. Then, do it again for five to 10 minutes and so on. (The human mind has a
short attention learning span.) Take breaks, carry cards around with you, and do this at different
times throughout the day.

 Studying for five to 10 minute segments 10 times a day is much more efficient than studying for four
hours at a time, and you will grasp it better!

 Read the card quietly to yourself several times and also aloud; review-spending the time and
repetition is your key to success.

 Carry some of the cards you have done with you when you go places for practice and review.

 You can also write out your passage several times on a note pad. Repetitive writing helps the words
sink deeper into your mind.

 You can also write verses down on "post-it" notes and stick them in prominent places were you will
see them often, such as your bathroom mirror, computer monitor, desk top, refrigerator door…not
on your car or where you should not be distracted (This is my wife's favorite way to do it)!

 Make sure the passage is written down accurately.

 On the card, you can also write down the category, such as a promise, a command, or a fruit, etc.

 Organize your cards into categories such as in chronological order or in topics such as Holiness,
Salvation, God's Character, Sovereignty, Faith, Assurance, etc.
Sixth: Record the Passage,

Let me understand the teaching of your precepts; then I will meditate on your wonders. Psalm
119:27

Take the passage you decided to memorize and after you have written it down, then read your
passage into a voice recorder, and play it back over and over. You can use a "walkman" or "Pod" device
so you can do this while you are shopping, driving, or just about anywhere (just not during church).

 Use a recording device such as a tape recorder, MP3 recorder, or electronic digital voice recorder.

 For synergy to memorize faster and better, combine the audio and your reading together!

 This works and it works great!

Seventh: Persevere

I rejoice in following your statutes as one rejoices in great riches. Psalm 119:14

Be persistent, and set goals in your endeavors to memorize God's Word. Once you have a good
plan and discipline, stick to it, and do not give up. At the same time, be realistic and do not set goals that
you cannot accomplish. (2 Peter 3:16).

 Apply the verse to your life; if His Word is not changing, transforming, and affecting you, seek why
by asking Him. Memorization does us no good unless we are doing something with it. We are to
submit and apply His Word, not just know it.

 Use an accountability partner with whom you can confer.

 An accountability partner can help in two ways-to check you and keep you steady on the journey
and also to quiz you on your verses.

 Remember to keep it up; if you do not use it, you will eventually lose it.
 Keep track and arrange your Bible memorization cards in categories. Keep the cards you are
currently working on together for daily review. Once you know a passage on your card, place it in a
separate pile, so you can review once a month, and keep the ones you do not know well separated
from the others so you can review them more often. You can also have a pile you can put together
to do at a future date.

Now, you should have a verse memorized! Don't expect instant success; it takes time. For slow
learners like me, it may take a month; for others, a week. Remember, it does take effort, but not as
much effort or hard work as most people might think. There is no reason to dread or be stressed as you
attempt to memorize God's most precious Word!

If this still seems overwhelming, take heart, you can do it. A lot of information is given; just do
"the basic plan" at first. Once you have it down, look over the rest of the tools and tips and use these
useful principles to develop your method. Also, try to start with baby steps-take on one short passage
and engage it for 10 minutes a day for a month. Then, in the second month, increase it to 2 passages
and 15 minutes, the third month, 3 passages and 20 minutes, and so on. Your goal is to spend at least
one hour a day in devotions, Bible reading, prayer, and Scripture memory-free from distractions and a
wandering mind. If this is too much and your mind wanders, just remember to break the time up
throughout the day-one-third in the in the morning, such as your reading, then one-third memorizing
during the midday, and the last one-third, such as your devotions or study, before bed. And, in each
section, pray.

The key to memorization is this: STUDY! REVIEW! and PERSEVERE! Repetition is the best way to
engrave the verses into your mind. If you do the above steps, bit by bit, then more and more, you will be
on your way to a more distinctive, purposeful, and productive Christian life filled with His power and
Spirit!

Are you Ready? What is Stopping You?

Peter, in his first epistle, was seeking to pastor his people so they could make
sound decisions and not be afraid of those who hated God and came against them (1
Pet. 3:15-17). The key to doing this is to make a firm, ongoing, and deep commitment to
know Christ and His Word. This is necessary for us to not just be prepared, but to stay
ahead of what is coming. We are the ambassadors of Christ and are called to show,
through our lifestyle and words, that He is The Lord and Savior. We may come across
hostile people who hate God and will hate us for being in Him; even so, we are still to
operate with respect and gentleness. The only true way to grow and know this is to
grow and know Him (Psalm 56:4; Luke 12:4-7; Rom. 8:31-39; 2 Cor. 5:20)!

The call to know His Word is the call to know Him, to be better in our Christian
life, and to do something with what He has given us. This is also a crucial aspect in
apologetics, which is the act of giving a defense such as a lawyer defends his client. We
should know about our faith, and with our best efforts and abilities, share it with others,
and even use words when necessary! A good Christian should know about the Bible
and faith, and practice it, not only to grow, but also to share it with other people. We do
not need to know all of the answers (I certainly do not), but we should know where to
get the info and then get back to them. We are always to share with maturity of
character even when others combat us. And, to have His Word in our Heart is power
upon power to make this all happen. Our faith will eventually undermine those who are
against us. Our apologetic ("answer"), when we recite our verses to others, is always to
be given with love, consideration, and tact-never in degrading terms.

Peter was trying to get his people to trust Christ further and thus have more
patience when times got tough. Having God's Word in our hearts and minds forms us,
and makes us stronger and better when life and people come against us. We are called
to surrender to His authority and precepts, allowing Him to be God, and allowing Him to
lead and shape us. We can show the love of Christ by also loving his Word and being
dedicated to knowing as much as we can.

Let Us Be Doers of His Mighty Word!

Check out some passages that tell us that discipleship and mentoring are not an option, but a command:
Matthew 28:16-20; Romans 12; 1 Corinthians 12; Galatians 6:1-10; Mark 1:35 - 2:12. We must follow out
of obedience, and mentor in a multigenerational lifestyle, caring for the total person. This will move us
from just playing church to really being a church.

Richard Joseph Krejcir is the Founder and Director of Into Thy Word Ministries, a missions and discipling
ministry. He is the author of several books including Into Thy Word, A Field Guide to Healthy
Relationships and Net-Work. He is also a pastor, teacher, and speaker. He is a graduate of Fuller
Theological Seminary in Pasadena, California (M.Div.) and holds a Doctor of Philosophy in Practical
Theology from London (Ph.D). He has garnered over 20 years of pastoral ministry experience, mostly in
youth ministry, including serving as a Church Growth Consultant.
© 1984, 2006 R. J. Krejcir Ph.D., Into Thy Word Ministries

S-ar putea să vă placă și