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I have a friend, who is very Beautiful. I met her when we had

Our Quaterly meeting in Office. SomeHow I got her number,&
we used to Chat a Lot.. Few days passed and our friendship
grew stronger. She became my best buddy.

Then came the day when I proposed Her. I still remember it. It
was My friend's Marriage Day. I Proposed her through SMS(big
mistake of mine). It was the most unforgettable moment of my
life. I Did't get any reply from her..Later in the evening i got a
Msg Saying that " We will be Friends Forever" ..That Msg
Brought me Some PAin..The next day i was Very Shy to talk to
her...

My friends supported me in those trying days. I Knew that She

Won't be Mine, but still I continued loving and thinking about
her
I tried to forget her..I had to carry on in life without her..

I didn¶t even think about my future. I just knew one thing ² I

love her...After that brief instance, we didn¶t meet for
nearly2Weeks. It was a period of heartburns and tribulations.
We had lots of quarrel, but we still stayed with each other.
There was something that brought us together, It was strange,
we could neither stay apart nor together. But there was always
this strong bonding and we continued conversing on the phone.
Hours used to pass and we couldn¶t realize it. I cared a lot for
Her..

After remaining apart and keeping alive the fire between us, we
again met. That meeting was the most precious gift . I was
tense and speechless when I met her.The day we did, we had a
fight over a small misunderstanding. Sometimes, lack of
conversation can lead to misunderstandings that can never be
sorted out. I tried a lot to resolve the differences, but She dint
want it to happen. I don¶t know why. I thought She was
frustrated. I left her alone for few days, thinking time will bring
her back. But She didn¶t. Maybe, She never felt my need in her
life.Life seems to be so easy, but it¶s not.

Whatever happened, I am still grateful to her because She was

the one with whom I fell in love. Now, when I feel like
expressing myself, I can¶t do that. She is not with me. I know,
now She will never turn up. I still love her and will continue to
love her ..She Has Gone, But Not Her Love.....

J






There¶s been someone that I cared and loved so much. For once in my life I¶ve felt
the warmth and happiness that I never felt before; that there is magic in every
laughter, every touched and every moment was worthwhile. Have you ever
thought, how sweeter could love be?

Everything began, when I was at the third year of my high school. It all started in
one afternoon; everything in my life began to change. I was just sitting in the
bench waiting for my driver to pick me up when suddenly I bumped some of my
classmates and asked me to go along with them. Without hesitation, I stood up and
gone together with them. As were walking along the sideways of our school
campus, Lisa the girl who had a long straight hair of our group, one of the famous
genius of our class and was also called our class president began to whisper to
them, ³do you see what I see?´ ³What? What? What did you see?´ they replied.
³Have you seen those two they¶ve been silent for minutes, aren¶t they perfect for
each other?´ ³You mean Ashley and Jake,´ they cried out loud. ³Ashley and Jake are
perfect for each other,´ they began to teased. It actually annoys me but suddenly
Jake the tall, dark and one of the hottest athletes in our school began to pushed me
so hard, I began to feel mad at him and in return I give him my best shot to
pushed him. When I noticed that it passed two hours so I hurried to the gate but
Jake stopped me and began to ask if he could walk me to the gate of our school
and I agreed. That day was one of my best days ever. From that day on, I started
to think how small things could make you so happy. So day after days, we do the
same things after we were dismissed by our teacher like doing some silly games,
walking along the sideways of our school campus and goofing around was our thing
and every night Jake and I would exchanged SMS messages.

Four months have pass, I¶ve been thinking it out to myself why this crazy little
things could make me gone insane, it feels like every day was full of happiness and
surprises. The day of the talent show came everyone was thrilled and excited. The
room was full of energy and everyone feels like dancing, well except me and a few
of my classmates. Jake came to me and wants to goof around again I feel annoyed
but I find myself caught up in his silly jokes, the way he smiles and laugh made my
heart leap in every time his with me. He gave me courage to be who I wanna be
and so I dance with him. There was even a time, when I was paired with another
classmate of mine he was known as Chase the coolest nerd of our class and by the
time we were dismissed Jake had been avoiding me. Upon realizing that he was
been avoiding me it makes me feel happy the thought that he was jealous of me
together with another guy. Night came, I send him an SMS message containing
³Jake, I know we¶ve been close for a little while. Just tell me honestly one thing, are
you jealous with me and Chase?´ I waited for his reply but it never came.

The last day of the school year came, I was beginning to think that I was drawn
unto him and decided that this would be the day I would confessed my feelings for
him. I can¶t let things end just like this; feels like my heart would lose a missing
piece without him. I ran all around the corners of our school but I never saw a
traced of him. My heart became weak and restless, like my heart wanted to burst in
excitement just to tell him that I love him way too much and I would feel breathless
without him.

Summer came and I¶m having the most boring days of my life stuck in my room
checking the net, until an SMS message came. ³I know we¶ve been good friends.
Whenever you need me I¶ll be always here for you. You can even share your secrets
to me. Now, can I ask you a question, who is you¶re crush?´ It came from Jake, the
thought came to me as I received the message what if I tell him now, and my heart
was beating faster and thought how would I reply him? So I decided to tell him the
following day. Early in the morning, I raised up from my bed just to send him an
SMS message containing: ³What if I tell you, it¶s you?´ He never did replied.

A week came and I received the message that I¶ve been longing that Jake would
tell me and it said, ³I LOVE YOU.´ Knowing that he loves me, my heart jumps filled
with joy and happiness. Without hesitation I send him an SMS saying, ³I LOVE YOU,
TOO.´ It had been one of those happy moments of my entire life. Days pass by and
everyday I¶ve been feeling blue.

The month of June came and I¶ve been feeling excited in seeing Jake again. It was
never long enough until the first day of school came I walked along the hallways
looking for him but before I could do so I met some of my classmates. We¶ve been
talking for a moment when I noticed there was a familiar figure heading towards
us. Knowing that it was Jake, I turned around as if I didn¶t notice him. When
suddenly Vanessa one of my tallest classmates during third year and the one with
black long hair began to cry aloud, ³Ashley, its Jake.´ As he walks along behind us,
he suddenly touched my shoulders and I began to feel uneasy to move, it brings
me sparks beneath my spine and my heart pounding so rapidly. Vanessa teased,
³Hey, look guys Ashley is blushing.´ Upon hearing those words it makes me feel so
embarrassed. Realizing that Jake and I aren¶t classmates anymore it makes me feel
insecure and missing him more and more. Whenever we meet at the hallways, we
can¶t stop staring and smiling at each other. The following day, I was busy talking
with Vanessa and I never noticed that Jake was just right behind us. I began to
spoke, ³Hey, who turned off the lights?´ I feel so uneasy upon realizing that it was
his hand that is binding my eyes, no wonder it is so warm. Everyday Jake would
come and visit me in my classroom. There was even a time I was bullied by my
classmates not anyone cared for me but except him. He tried to protect me from
being hurt. He even said, ³I would not allow myself to let anyone hurt you.´ During
that moment I feel safe and comfort. All my tears dried away because he gave me
courage to believe in myself. Usually every love story ends in happily ever after but
not all.

It was a nice weather to start the day not until I heard that Jake had a girlfriend
but I thought it was just a big joke played on me. I never believe what the rumors
say. Everyone was dismissed and so I headed to Jakes class I saw him together
with Bianca one of the campus heart throb of our school. I felt my heart crushed
into pieces as I see them talking and glancing at each other. My tears started to fell
so I ran off and headed home. I made a promise to myself that I would forget
everything about him. The following day, there he was at our class trying to catch
my attention. He stared at me, his eyes full of questions. But I didn¶t mind. He
didn¶t know how much courage I take to cover up my pain and endure it all. The
following months was the most heart breaking moments of my life? Every day I
would just stare at the window pane thinking of him, wondering if he misses me
too, even during lunch time I snacked out of our class and head towards the
restroom, there I would cry alone all by myself all those sad thoughts kept running
gently in my heart the feeling that were close yet we were so far away and each
night all those magical moments we had kept ringing in my head all night, the
feeling of warmth and happiness was now long gone and the pain that I can¶t bear
take over me. One afternoon, accidentally I met few of my classmates last year and
Jake was there too. When he saw me he began to turn around and walk out of the
room. I hate the feeling whenever someone turned around me. I began to rush
unto Jake like my heart is controlling me and telling me to do so. But I lost the
sight of him. I believe it was never an accident but it was fate. There was a time, I
saw Jake cry alone, and my heart is thorn as I saw him cry, I can¶t bear seeing him
cry and all I wished for him is happiness, during those times all I had in mind was
to hugged and comfort him and tell him that I still love him but there isn¶t a need
for me to do so because I never was his girlfriend. So I hide behind the tree and
deny all my feelings for Jake when all I wanted was to spend another moment
beside him. But I was drowned with all my heartaches and pains, thought I could
get over him with just a month but a month wasn¶t enough than I expected. There
was also a time I had my craziest moment that I couldn¶t even control of myself in
chasing after him but there was no sign of him. I was tired and my heart is raging
with desires for him. Thinking, how would I smile without his presence? How would
I laugh without him goofing around me? But, I don¶t wanna think I¶m selfish just
because of love.

Graduation came, but this time around it was different. When I tried to look in his
eyes, there I saw full of curiosity and pretending but still I don¶t know why. My
heart is confused and all I could think was him. His name sings in my ear, the
moments we had been stuck in my head, his heart was still dwelling inside me,
though tears reappear as the seniors make a farewell to the high school life.
Knowing, I won¶t see him no more my heart was filled with sadness. After
graduation, I felt so helpless every day I can¶t eat well and each night I felt
sleepless crying over him.

A year had passed but I never regret knowing Jake, knowing that he is happy, I
would be happy too. There were moments in our life we gave up just because of
love. But we choose to love over and over again even though how many times
we¶ve felt pain. Because knowing that we have live and had loved was the most
wonderful thing that God had given unto us and I¶m grateful, if I hadn¶t known Jake
I may never know what it feels to risk everything for love.
For now I know, love is the sweetest pain, love is the sweetest feeling that we can¶t
resist. For the people who read this story believe it or not, true love really does
exist. Just keep on believing that fate, destiny and love are in your hands.




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À


Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice but falling in love with
you I had no control over....I remember the first day when i saw him in class. He
was wearing white shirt and black pant. I just looked at him and was impressed by
his personality....... days passed........... and just a hello hi sort of conversation
continued. In November he sent me an SMS. I messaged him and asked " who are
you". He called me and informed. Then we used to send forwarded messages to
each other. Sometimes he used to comment on those messages and i felt very nice.
One day he added me on orkut. Daily i used to look at his pics for hours. I dont
know why i used to look but i felt something for him. Then we started chatting and
there was a sort of excitement. We even started talking on phones. The whole day i
used to wait for the night so that we can chat. we became friends but my feelings
for him grew more and more as the time passed. Then one evening he called and
asked "can we meet?" . It was an unexpected surprise for me which changed my
whole life. I said yes!!!!!!!!!! and we met at lake. It was cold out there. He came
running..........my heart started beating at full speed. We started walking
...........he was a bit fast. I wanted to tel him to be lil slow but i didnt. I became
speechless. I wanted to look into his eyes but i looked here and
there...............infact on everthing except him. We came back to parking area and
he sat on my kinetic ................and i sat behind him and took a small round of that
area. That was toooooooooo romantic but i was pretending to be normal. We went
back to our homes ............And i recalled every moment spent together again and
again. We met again at lake. He was with his friend. We ate petty and my hands
started shivering though i was warm enough....... he jumped and told his
friend...........i felt shy as if i did something wrong. His friend went and we both
sat.......lake never seemed to me so beautiful as i felt at that time. We both were
sitting closely..... I wanted to say You are what I never knew I always wanted........
Next time we went in a garden. He had to go back home also but he was not in a
hurry. He asked me suddenly " What is going on between us". I became confused
......smiled and didnt gave any reply. He asked me again and again but i was silent.
I couldnt sleep at night..........! I was in love! After he came back from his home,
we met again in a garden. It was dark all around ....... He said that nothing can
happen. All my hopes were shattered. I came back home and cried a lot. I felt as if
i am worthless.............not good for anything. Every time i used to open my orkut
account i could see him. So i decided to delete him so that i can forget him. He
used to message me n i used to reply. I always felt nice whenever he used to send
me a message. I again added him on orkut and said sorry with the add request. He
called me on new year and said we will meet when he comes back. I again started
thinking about him........we met.......on 26th January at his residence. We played
all sorts of games. Then suddenly he said " what if i kiss you?" . I became
numb........ I said " i know you will not do". He remained very busy with his office
work so i never forced him to meet me frequently. We met on 10th feb (his
birthday) for five minutes. It was drizzling. I didnt wanted to say bye but i had
to........ We met again in March on Holi. That was the turning point of our
relationship........where our eyes said everything to each other. The most eloquent
silence.........where only love existed. We met again and again and came more
close..............more...................more n more. Actually, there is no remedy for
love but to love more. Whenever I meet him.... I feel the same charm as I felt on
the first day. I want to be with him forever n ever n ever............! Amen!

It had been raining for more than a week, so much rain it made
everyday seemed so restless and gloomy. She called and said
she was coming up. It was the third time she came up to see
me that week. I carried her excuse of why she came all the
way here and went to meet her at the nearby seven-eleven.
She was standing there alone, carrying her red umbrella. Her
friend had dropped her off. It was raining and she was
shivering. She looked weak and fragile in the harsh rain,
wearing not enough to keep her warm.

I walked up to her and said, "You shouldn't come see me

anymore," and stuff like how we shouldn't be together.

She said, "I miss you."

I told her coldly, "Lets go, I'll take you home."

She did not open up her umbrella, I knew she wanted to share
mine.

I said, "Open up your umbrella, let's go."

Unwillingly, She opened up her umbrella and walked with me to

the car. She said she hadn't eaten lunch or dinner and asked if
we could stop at some place to eat.

Right away I answered with a stoned heart, "No!"

Disappointed, she asked me to take her to the train station,

she said she would take the train back home.

Maybe it was the rain, all the trains were full of people with
umbrellas and suit cases who were eager to get home, not
caring about who just passed by. We waited and waited, she
looked at me innocently. Being together for so long, of course I
knew what she meant. I understand how she must feel when
she came all this way here in this kind of weather and I treat
her like this. With her soft eyes staring at me, I felt guilt and
wanted to let her stay for the night.

But reality struck again, I said to her coldly, "Let's go try the
other train station."
We were living in the same apartment building, on the same
floor. Back then there were four of us, and we got along well.
We would always eat dinner together, watch movies, and
sometimes go camping. We were more like a family, but I
didn't know I would end up falling in love with the only girl of
the four. Maybe it was during the last year of college, having
lived together for two years, we developed deep feelings for
each other. After she graduated she went back home, and I
stayed for one more year to finish school. During that year I
was only able to take the train down to see her on holidays, but
never for long. That was how we kept the treasured
relationship.

We were walking along the side of the road. She was in front of
me and I was right behind her. Her umbrella had a broken
spoke. She looked liked a wounded soldier, carrying her rusted
rifle walking weakly. Many times, she was too into thinking or
whatever she was doing, drifting off the road, she almost got
hit by the cars passing by. I wanted to just take her in my
arms, but with the love I had for her and the constant pain in
my stomach, I did nothing. On the way, we passed by the park
where we use to always go.

She begged and said, "Lets go in the park just for a little while
please, I promise I'll go home right after this."

With her begging, my cold heart softened, but I still put up an

annoyed face and walked in the park. I was just sitting on the
benches looking like I wanted to leave. She went to the big oak
tree and she was looking for something. I knew she was
looking for what we wrote on that tree with a silver ink pen half
a year ago. If I remember it right, it said, "Chris and Susan was
here, Chris had tea and Susan was drinking hot chocolate.
Hope Chris and Susan would always remember this day, always
loving each other, forever." She was looking around for quite a
while, then she came back slowly with tears on her face.

She said, "Chris, I can't find it, it's not there anymore."

I felt so sour inside, there was a stream of pain, flowing into

my heart, the kind of pain I've never felt before. But all I could
do was pretend I didn't care, and said, "Can we go now?"

I opened up my big black umbrella, she was just standing

there, didn't want to leave yet, hoping there was still a chance.
She said, "You made up the story of you and that other girl
didn't you? I know I frustrate you sometimes, but I'll change,
can't we start over?"

I didn't say a word, just looked down and shook my head. After
that we just kept on walking towards the train station, didn't
say a word to each other.

Four years ago, the doctor said I had cancer, but it was found
early, so it was still curable. Thinking that it was okay, I started
living my normal life again, and even forgot about the cancer. I
didn't think about the cancer again and did not go back to the
doctor. Until a month ago, my stomach was hurting for two
weeks straight, and the nightmare awakened me again. First I
thought the pain would go away, but it grew stronger until to
the point that I couldn't take it anymore. I went back to the
doctor and took an X-ray. The picture came out and there was
a big black spot, which proved the truth that I did not want to
believe. I was at the most glittering part of my life, but it was
coming to an end. I wanted myself and the people around me
to go through the least pain possible, so I decided to commit
suicide. But I couldn't let people find out about my intentions,
especially Susan, the person I love the most in this whole
world, who still doesn't know about the truth. Susan was still
young, she shouldn't have to go through this. So I made up
some stories and lied to her. It was a cruel thing to do, and it
broke her heart, but it was the fastest way to wipe out three
years feelings. I didn't have much time, because I would soon
start to loose hair and she would find out eventually. But now
I'm close to succeeding, this drama would soon be over. Thirty
minutes more this would all come to an end, that was what I
had in mind.

The train had stopped running so I called a taxi for her. We

were just standing there, waiting, loosing our last moments in
silence.

I saw the taxi from far away, I held my tears and said to her,
"Take care of yourself, take good care of yourself."

She didn't talk, just nodded lightly, and then opened up her
misshaped umbrella and stepped out on the street. Out in the
rain, we became two single life forms, one red, one black, so
far away from each other. I opened the door for her and she
got in, then I close the gate that would separate me from her
forever. I stood by the car, staring in the dark window, at the
first love in my life, also the last one, walking out of my life.
The car started, driving into the street. Finally I couldn't hold
my sorrow and the twist in my heart any longer, waving my
arms rapidly chasing after the taxi, because I knew, this would
be the last time I see her. I wanted to tell her I still love her, I
wanted to tell her to stay, I wanted to tell her so much, but the
taxi had already turned in the corner. Warm tears kept falling
down my face, blended with the cold rain drops. I was cold, not
because of the rain. I was cold inside.

She left, and I didn't get anymore of her phone calls even until
today. I know she didn't see my tears, because they were
washed away by the rain. I left without regrets. But I'm not
Chris, I'm that girl Susan, using my memory, and his diary I
found after one year since he left, writing down these last
words.


c





À
Unknown

Once upon a time, there was once a guy who was very much in
love with this girl. This romantic guy folded 1,000 pieces of
paper cranes as a gift to his girl. Although, at that time he was
just a small executive in his company, his future doesn't
seemed too bright, they were very happy together. Until one
day, his girl told him she was going to Paris and will never
come back. She also told him that she cannot visualize any
future for the both of them, so let's go their own ways there
and then... heartbroken, the guy agreed.

When he regained his confidence, he worked hard day and

night, slogging his body and mind just to make something out
of himself. Finally with all these hard work and with the help of
friends, this guy had set up his own company...
"You never fail until you stop trying." he always told himself. "I
must make it in life!"

One rainy day, while this guy was driving, he saw an elderly
couple sharing an umbrella in the rain walking to some
destination. Even with the umbrella, they were still drenched. It
didn't take him long to realize those were his ex-girlfriend's
parents. With a heart in getting back at them, he drove slowly
beside the couple, wanting them to spot him in his luxury
sedan. He wanted them to know that he wasn't the same
anymore. He had his own company, car, condo, etc. He had
made it in life!

Before the guy can realize, the couple was walking towards a
cemetery, and he got out of his car and followed them...and he
saw his ex-girlfriend, a photograph of her smiling sweetly as
ever at him from her tombstone... and he saw his precious
paper cranes in a bottle placed beside her tomb. Her parents
saw him. He walked over and asked them why this had
happened. They explained, she did not leave for France at all.
She was stricken ill with cancer. In her heart, she had believed
that he will make it someday, but she did not want her illness
to be his obstacle ... therefore she had chosen to leave him.

She had wanted her parents to put his paper cranes beside her,
because, if the day comes when fate brings him to her again he
can take some of those back with him. The guy just wept ...the
worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them
but knowing you can't have them and will never see them
again.


 




À
Unknown

This story is about a girl who felt ignored..

I have a boyfriend who grew up with me. His name is Jin.

I always thought of him as a friend until last year, when we
went to a trip from a club, I found out that I fell in love with
him.
Before the trip was over, I took a step and confessed my love
for him.
And soon, we became a pair of lovers, but we loved each other
in different ways.
I always concentrated on him only, but by his side, there was
so many other girls.
To me, he was the only one, but to him, maybe I was just
another girl...
"Jin, do you want to go watch a movie?" I asked.
"I can't"
"Why? You need to study at home?" I felt disappointment
grabbing me.
"No... I am going to meet a friend..."
He was always like that.
He met girls in front of me, like it was nothing.
To him, I was just a girlfriend.
The word 'love' only came out of my mouth.
Since I knew him, I had never heard I'm say 'I love you'
before.
To us, there weren't any anniversaries at all.
He didn't say anything from the first day and it continued till
1O0 days...2O0 days...
Everyday, before we say goodbye, he would just hand me a
doll, everyday, without fail. I don't know why...
Then one day...
Me: Um, Jin, I...
Jin: What...don't drag, just say...
Me: I love you.
Jin: ...........you.....um, just take this doll and go home.
That was how he ignored my 'three words' and handed me the
doll.
Then he disappeared, like he was running away.
The dolls I received from him everyday, filled my room, one by
one.
There were many....
Then one day came, my 15th year old birthday.
When I got up in the morning, I pictured a party with him, and
stranded myself in my room, waiting for his call.
But... lunch passed, dinner passed...and soon the sky was
dark... he still didn't call.
It was already tiring to look at the phone anymore.
2am in the morning, he suddenly called me and woke me from
my sleep.
He told me to come out of the house.
Still. I felt joy and I ran out happily.
Me: Jin...
Jin: Here...take this...
Again, he handed me a little doll.
Me: What's this?
Jin: I didn't give it to you yesterday, so I am giving it to you
now.
I'm going home now, bye.
Me: Wait, wait! Do you know what today is?
Jin: Today? Huh?
I felt so sad, I thought he would remember my birthday.
He turned around and walked away like nothing had happened.
Then I shouted...
"Wait..."
Jin: You have something to say?
Me: Tell me, tell me you love me...
Jin: What?!
Me: Tell me
I put my pathetic self behind and clung onto him.
But he just said simple cold words and left.
"I don't want to say...that I love someone so easily, if you are
desperate to hear it, then find someone else."
That was what he said. Then ran off...
My legs felt numb...and I collapsed to the ground. He didn't
want to say it easily...
How could he...
I felt that...
Maybe he is not the right guy for me...
After that day, I stranded myself at home crying, just crying.
He didn't call me, although I was waiting.
He just continued handing me a little doll every morning
outside my house.
That's how those dolls piled up in my room... everyday
After a month, I got myself together and went to school.
But what made the pain resurface was that.... I saw him on a
street...with another girl...
He had a smile on his face, one that he never showed me...as
he touched the doll...
I ran straight back home and looked at the dolls in my room,
and tears fell...
Why did he gave these to me...
Those dolls are probably picked out by some other girls...
In a fit of anger, I threw the dolls around.
Then suddenly, the phone rang. It was him.
He told me to come out to the bus stop outside my house.
I tried to calm myself down and walked to the bus stop.
I kept reminding myself that I am going to forget him,
that....its going to end.
Then he came into my sight, holding a big doll.
Jin: Jo, I thought you were pissed, you really came?
I couldn't help hating him, acting like nothing had happened
and joking around.
Soon, he held out the doll as usual...
Me: I don't need it.
Jin: What....why...
I grabbed the doll from his hands and threw it on the road.
Me: I don't need this doll, I don't need it anymore!! I don't
want to see a person like you again!
I spitted out all the words that were inside me. But unlike other
days, his eyes were very shaky.
"I'm sorry" He apologized in a tiny voice.
He then walked over to the road to pick up the doll...
"You stupid! Why are you picking up the doll?! Just throw it
away!!!"
But he ignored me and just went to pick the doll.
Then...
Honk~ Honk~
With a loud honk, a big truck was heading towards him.
"Jin! Move! Move away!" I shouted...
But he didn't hear me, he squatted down and picked up the
doll.
"Jin, move!"
HONK~!!!
"Boom!" That sound, so terrifying.
That's how he went away from me.
That's how he went away without evening opening his eyes to
say one word to me.
After that day, I had to go through everyday with guiltiness and
the sadness of losing him...
And after spending two months like a crazy person...
I took out the dolls.
Those were the only gifts he left me since the day we started
going out.
I remembered the days I spent with him and started to count
the days... when we were in love...
"One...two... three..."
That was how... I started to count the dolls...
"Four hundred and eighty four... four hundred and eighty
five..."
It all ended with 485 dolls.
I then started to cry again, with a doll in my arms.
I hugged it tightly, then suddenly...
"I love you~, I love you~"
I dropped the dolls, shocked.
"I....lo..ve...you??"
I picked up the dolls and pressed its stomach.
"I love you~ I love you~"
It can't be!
I pressed all the dolls' stomach as it piled on the side.
"I love you~"
"I love you~"
"I love you~"
Those words came out non-stop.
I...love you...
Why didn't I realize that.....
That his heart was always by my side, protecting me.
Why didn't I realize that he love me this much...
I took out the doll under the bed and pressed it's stomach, that
was the last doll, the one that fell on the road.
It had his blood stain on it.
The voice came out, the on that I was missing so much...
"Jo...Do you know what today is? We've been loving each other
for 486 days. Do you know what 486 is? I couldn't say I love
you.... Um... since I was too shy... If you forgive me and take
this doll, I will say that i love you... everyday... till I die... Jo...
I love you..."
The tears came flowing out of me. Why? Why? I asked god,
why do I only know about all this now?
He can't be by my side, but he loved me until his last minute...
For that... and for that reason... to me... it became courage...
to live a beautiful life...
 





À
Unknown

John Blanchard stood up from the bench, straightened his Army

uniform, and studied the crowd of people making their way
through Grand Central Station. He looked for the girl whose
heart he knew, but whose face he didn't, the girl with the rose.
His interest in her had begun thirteen months before in a
Florida library. Taking a book off the shelf he found himself
intrigued, not with the words of the book, but with the notes
penciled in the margin. The soft handwriting reflected a
thoughtful soul and insightful mind.
In front of the book, he discovered the previous owner's name,
Miss Hollis Maynell. With time and effort he located her
address. She lived in New York City. He wrote her a letter
introducing himself and inviting her to correspond. The next
day he was shipped overseas for service in World War II

During the next year and one-month the two grew to know
each other through the mail. Each letter was a seed falling on a
fertile heart. A Romance was budding. Blanchard requested a
photograph, but she refused. She felt that if he really cared, it
wouldn't matter what she looked like.

When the day finally came for him to return from Europe, they
scheduled their first meeting - 7:00 pm at Grand Central
Station in New York.

"You'll recognize me, " she wrote, "by the red rose I'll be
wearing on my lapel." So at 7:00 he was in the station looking
for a girl whose heart he loved, but whose face he'd never
seen.

I'll let Mr. Blanchard tell you what happened: A young women
was coming toward me, her figure long and slim. Her blonde
hair lay back in curls from her delicate ears; her eyes were blue
as flowers. Her lips and chin had a gentle firmness, and in her
pale green suit she was like springtime come alive. I started
toward her, entirely forgetting to notice that she was not
wearing a rose. As I moved, a small, provocative smile curved
her lips. "Going my way, sailor?" she murmured. Almost
uncontrollably I made one step closer to her, and then I saw
Hollis Maynell. She was standing almost directly behind the girl.
A women well past 40, she had graying hair tucked under a
worn hat. She was more than plump, her thick-ankled feet
thrust into low-heeled shoes. The girl in the green suit was
walking quickly away. I felt as though I split in two, so keen
was my desire to follow her, and yet so deep was my longing
for the women whose spirit had truly companioned me and
upheld my own.

And there she stood. Her pale, plump face was gentle and
sensible, her gray eyes had a warm and kindly twinkle. I did
not hesitate. My fingers gripped the small worn blue leather
copy of the book that was something precious, something
perhaps even better than love, a friendship for which I had
been and must ever be grateful.

I squared my shoulders and saluted and held out the book to

the women, even though while I spoke I felt choked by the
bitterness of my disappointment. "I'm Lieutenant John
Blanchard, and you must be Miss Maynell. I am so glad you
could meet me; may I take you to dinner?"

The women's face broadened into a tolerant smile. "I don't

know what this is about, son," she answered, "but the young
lady in the green suit who just went by, she begged me to wear
this rose on my coat. And she said if you were to ask me out to
dinner, I should go and tell you that she is waiting for you in
the big restaurant across the street. She said it was some kind
of test!"

It's not difficult to understand and admire Miss Maynell's

wisdom. The true nature of a heart is seen in it's response to
the unattractive. "Tell me whom you love," Houssaye wrote,
"And I will tell you who you are."

J




À


There is a story many years ago of an elementary teacher. Her

name was Mrs. Thompson. And as she stood in front of her 5th
grade class on the very first day of school, she told the children
a lie. Like most teachers, she looked at her students and said
that she loved them all the same.
But that was impossible, because there in the front row,
slumped in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard.
Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed
that he didn't play well with the other children, that his clothes
were messy and that he constantly needed a bath. And Teddy
could be unpleasant. It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson
would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad
red pen, making bold X's and then putting a big "F" at the top
of his papers.

At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required

to review each child's past records and she put Teddy's off until
last. However, when she reviewed his file, she was in for a
surprise.

Teddy's first grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright child with

a ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good
manners...he is a joy to be around."
His second grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is an excellent student,
well liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his
mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a
struggle."

His third grade teacher wrote, "His mother's death has been
hard on him. He tries to do his best but his father doesn't show
much interest and his home life will soon affect him if some
steps aren't taken."

Teddy's fourth grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and

doesn't show much interest in school. He doesn't have many
friends and sometimes sleeps in class."

By now, Mrs. Thompson realized the problem and she was

ashamed of herself. She felt even worse when her students
brought her Christmas presents, wrapped in beautiful ribbons
and bright paper, except for Teddy's. His present which was
clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper that he got from a
grocery bag.

Mrs. Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other

presents. Some of the children started to laugh when she found
a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing, and a
bottle that was one quarter full of perfume. But she stifled the
children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet
was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the perfume on her
wrist.

Teddy Stoddard stayed after school that day just long enough
to say, "Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my Mom
used to." After the children left she cried for at least an hour.
On that very day, she quit teaching reading, and writing, and
arithmetic. Instead, she began to teach children..

Mrs. Thompson paid particular attention to Teddy. As she

worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive. The more she
encouraged him, the faster he responded. By the end of the
year, Teddy had become one of the smartest children in the
class and, despite her lie that she would love all the children
the same, Teddy became one her "teacher's pets."

A year later, she found a note under her door, from Teddy,
telling her that she was still the best teacher he ever had in his
whole life. Six years went by before she got another note from
Teddy. He then wrote that he had finished high school, third in
his class, and she was still the best teacher he ever had in his
whole life.
Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while
things had been tough at times, he'd stayed in school, had
stuck with it, and would soon graduate from college with the
highest of honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson that she was still
the best and favorite teacher he ever had in his whole life.

Then four more years passed and yet another letter came.. This
time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he
decided to go a little further. The letter explained that she was
still the best and favorite teacher he ever had. But now his
name was a little longer -- the letter was signed, Theodore F.
Stoddard, M.D.

The story doesn't end there. You see, there was yet another
letter that spring. Teddy said he'd met this girl and was going
to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of
years ago and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson might agree
to sit in the place at the wedding that was usually reserved for
the mother of the groom. Of course, Mrs. Thompson did. And
guess what? She wore that bracelet, the one with several
rhinestones missing. And she made sure she was wearing the
perfume that Teddy remembered his mother wearing on their
last Christmas together.

They hugged each, and Dr. Stoddard whispered in Mrs.

Thompson's ear, "Thank you Mrs. Thompson for believing in
me. Thank you so much for making me feel important and
showing me that I could make a difference."

Mrs. Thompson, with tears in her eyes, whispered back. She

said, "Teddy, you have it all wrong. You were the one who
taught me that I could make a difference. I didn't know how to
teach until I met you."




 
À
Unknown

A story is told about a soldier who was finally coming home

after having fought in Vietnam. He called his parents from San
Francisco.

"Mom and Dad, I'm coming home, but I've a favor to ask. I
have a friend I'd like to bring home with me.

"Sure," they replied, "we'd love to meet him."

"There's something you should know," the son continued, "he

was hurt pretty badly in the fighting. He stepped on a land
mind and lost an arm and a leg. He has nowhere else to go,
and I want him to come live with us."

"I'm sorry to hear that, son. Maybe we can help him find
somewhere to live."

"No, Mom and Dad, I want him to live with us."

"Son," said the father, "you don't know what you're asking.
Someone with such a handicap would be a terrible burden on
us. We have our own lives to live, and we can't let something
like this interfere with our lives. I think you should just come
home and forget about this guy. He'll find a way to live on his
own."

At that point, the son hung up the phone. The parents heard
nothing more from him. A few days later, however, they
received a call from the San Francisco police. Their son had
died after falling from a building, they were told. The police
believed it was suicide.

The grief-stricken parents flew to San Francisco and were taken

to the city morgue to identify the body of their son. They
recognized him, but to their horror they also discovered
something they didn't know, their son had only one arm and
one leg.

The parents in this story are like many of us. We find it easy to
love those who are good-looking or fun to have around, but we
don't like people who inconvenience us or make us feel
uncomfortable. We would rather stay away from people who
aren't as healthy, beautiful, or smart as we are.

Thankfully, there's someone who won't treat us that way.

Someone who loves us with an unconditional love that
welcomes us into the forever family, regardless of how messed
up we are.

Tonight, before you tuck yourself in for the night, say a little
prayer that God will give you the strength you need to accept
people as they are, and to help us all be more understanding of
those who are different from us!!! There's a miracle called
Friendship That dwells in the heart You don't know how it
happens Or when it gets started But you know the special lift It
always brings. And you realize that Friendship Is God's most
precious gift!

Friends are a very rare jewel, indeed. They make you smile and
encourage you to succeed. They lend an ear, they share a word
of praise, and they always want to open their hearts to us.
Show your friends how much you care....
J 
c
 




À
Unknown

A friend of ours was walking down a deserted Mexican beach at

sunset. As he walked along, he began to see another man in
the distance. As he grew nearer, he noticed that the local
native kept leaning down, picking something up, and throwing
it out into the water. Time and again, he kept hurling
something out into the ocean.

As our friend approached even closer, he noticed that the man

was picking up starfish that had washed up on the beach and,
one at a time, was throwing them back into the water.

Our friend was puzzled. He approached the man and said,

"Good evening, friend. I was wondering what you are doing?"

"I'm throwing these starfish back into the ocean. You see, it is
low tide right now, and all of these starfish have washed up
onto the shore. If I don't throw them back into the sea, they'll
die from lack of oxygen."

"I understand," my friend replied, "but there must be

thousands of starfish on this beach! You can't possibly get to all
of them. There are simply too many! And don't you realize this
is probably happening on hundreds of beaches all up and down
this coast? Can't you see that you can't possibly make a
difference?"

The local native smiled, bent down, and picked up yet another
starfish and, as he threw it back into the sea, replied, "Made a
difference to THAT one!"








À
Unknown

A store owner was tacking a sign above his door that read
"Puppies For Sale." Signs like that have a way of attracting
small children, and sure enough, a little boy appeared under
the store owner's sign. "How much are you going to sell the
puppies for?" he asked.
The store owner replied, "Anywhere from $30 to $50."

The little boy reached in his pocket and pulled out some
change. "I have $2.37," he said. "Can I please look at them?"

The store owner smiled and whistled and out of the kennel
came Lady, who ran down the aisle of his store followed by five
teeny, tiny balls of fur.

One puppy was lagging considerably behind. Immediately the

little boy singled out the lagging, limping puppy and said,
"What's wrong with that little dog?"

The store owner explained that the veterinarian had examined

the little puppy and had discovered it didn't have a hip socket.
It would always limp. It would always be lame.

The little boy became excited. "That is the puppy that I want to
buy."

The store owner said, "No, you don't want to buy that little
dog. If you really want him, I'll just give him to you."

The little boy got quite upset. He looked straight into the store
owner's eyes, pointing his finger, and said, "I don't want you to
give him to me. That little dog is worth every bit as much as all
the other dogs and I'll pay full price. In fact, I'll give you $2.37
now, and 50 cents a month until I have him paid for."

The store owner countered, "You really don't want to buy this
little dog. He is never going to be able to run and jump and
play with you like the other puppies."

To his surprise, the little boy reached down and rolled up his
pant leg to reveal a badly twisted, crippled left leg supported by
a big metal brace. He looked up at the store owner and softly
replied, "Well, I don't run so well myself, and the little puppy
will need someone who understands!"

We ALL need someone who understands!

î





À
Unknown

On my way home from coaching basketball yesterday, I was

listening to WGN; my favorite talk radio station out of Chicago.
I could tell right away that there was something wrong by the
somber mood of the speaker. There had been a plane crash.
Two small planes collided into each other over a northern
suburb of Chicago. What made the story hit close to home was
that Bob Collins, the morning show man for WGN, was the pilot
of one of the planes and had been killed. (I'm sure that many
readers have tuned in "Uncle Bobby" on their car radios in the
Midwest.) Later that night, as I made my 40 minute drive to
my third shift job, I listened as the station reminisced and paid
tribute to a man who was loved by many. They told story after
story, describing him as the ultimate friend, and a man who
had lived life to the fullest. Genuine love and affection poured
in from all over the country. The more I listened about how this
man had influenced those around him, the more discouraged I
became.

Why you ask?

I was discouraged because I wanted to know why we as a

culture, wait until somebody has passed away before we tell
them how much we love them? Why do we wait until
someone's ears can't hear before we let them how much they
mean to us? Why do we wait until it is too late before we recall
the good qualities of a person? Why do we build someone up
after they have gone into eternity? What good does it do then!
We share memory after memory, as we laugh, cry, and think
back about what was positive in a person's life. Yes, it does
help us cope with the grief of losing someone that was special
to us. And yes it does bring those who are coping, closer
together. But as we lovingly remember this person, our words
fall short of the ears that most needed to hear them.

Just once I would like to see a celebration of life, instead of a

gathering of death. A celebration where stories are told, eyes
mist over, laughter rings out; and as the speaker concludes his
or her loving tribute, the person they are honoring rises from
their chair and gives them the biggest bear hug! Wouldn't that
be something! The special person gets to hear the stories and
come to the realization that they have made a difference on
this earth. And all this is done well before they leave their
earthly bodies and go into eternity. And when the inevitable
funeral finally comes, we can say good bye with the knowledge
that they knew exactly how people felt about them while they
were here on earth.

I now have a stronger resolve to tell those around me how

much they mean to me. I am going to let my wife know just
how loved and appreciated she is, not only by my words, but
also by my actions. I am going to play Batman with my four
year old more often, and in the middle of our romping, I am
going to grab him, hug him tightly, and tell him how thankful I
am that he is my son. I am going to sneak into my sleeping
toddler's bedroom, place my lips on his chubby cheek, and
thank God for the bundle of joy he has brought into my life.
Each day I will make a point to tell both of my boys how much I
love them, whether they are four or eighteen! From there, I am
going to let family and friends know the tremendous impact
they have had on my life. And last but not least, I am going to
let the high school players I coach know that I look forward to
each and every minute that I get to spend with them in the
gym.

Do you love someone? Then tell them! Has someone been an

influence in your life? Then give them a call! Has someone
made a difference in your life? Then write them a letter or send
them an email! Don't let another day go by without letting that
person know. There is something special about a written letter
that expresses feelings of love towards another. I don't know
about you, but I have letters and cards from people that I have
saved for years, and from time to time, I get them out and
reread them. They can turn a depressing day into one where
you realize just how blessed and loved you are.

Life is too short to leave kind words unsaid. The words you say,
or the letter you write, might just make all the difference in the
world.
ñ




J




J

ñ


À


She was not beautiful.

Nothing about her was extraordinary.
Nothing about her made her stand out in a crowd.
She grew up in a family of six.
The eldest, she learnt responsibility at an early age.
As she grew stronger, and brighter,
She instilled a sort of light cheer to whomever she met.

She was not beautiful.

But she made others feel beautiful about themselves.
She meets a rebel boy who thinks he's all man.
Befriending him, she teaches him how to read,
A little boost the man needed to go to college.

They became friends fast and she fell,

Fast in love with her rugged, handsome student.
The "man" then finds himself in a dilemma
He soon found himself in love with a girl.
A girl so beautiful, she turned even the grouchiest men's head.
Her hair was a halo of light around her,
Her eyes the bluest blue of ocean.

Like an angel he tells his tutor

Like a beautiful angel.
The girl swallows a lump at her throat

She was not beautiful

She did not possess the heart of the one she loved
But she did not care.
As long as he was happy,
She would be or so she tried to.

She helped him write the most beautiful letter to his angel
All the time envisioning that it was she herself
Receiving those very letters.
And so the girl helped him choose the right words,
Buy the right gifts for his angel
His angel brought him much joy
And much pain to the girl who cried behind her smiles.
But that never stopped her from giving more
Than she will ever receive.

Then one day, all hell broke loose

The angel he loved left him for another man,
A richer, more successful man.
The boy was stunned
He was so hurt he did not speak for days
The girl went to him
He cried on her shoulder and she cried with him
He hurt and so did she.

Time went by.

And so the wounds heal.
The boy realizes something about his friend/tutor
He never realized before.
How her laughter sounded heavenly
Or how her smiles brightened up the darkest days.
Or simply how beautiful, yes beautiful she looked to him!

Beautiful.
This plain, simple girl was beautiful to him.
And he began to fall.
Fall so in love with this beautiful girl.

On one day, he picked up all his courage to see her.

He walked to her house, nervous ad fidgeting.
Running his thoughts over and over in his head.
He was going to tell her how beautiful she was to him.
He was going to tell her how wonderfully n love he was with
her.
He knocked.
No one was home.

The next day he found out,

The beautiful girl he fell in love with had brain aneurysm
That put her into a coma.
The doctors were grim and the family decided to let her go.

One final time he got to see her.

He held her hand.
He stroked her hair,
And he cried for this beautiful girl.
He cried for he will never see her smile
Or hear her speak his name

He cried.
But it was too late.

The beautiful girl was buried and the heavens broke out
In a beautiful spring shower, a cry for their loss.
She was the most beautiful girl in the world.

Look around you.

Aren't there a lot of plain faces?
Take a good look
A real good look or you might miss out
On that beautiful person.

Forever.
î 




À


He was driving home one evening, on a two-lane country road.

Work, in this small mid-western community, was almost as
slow as his beat-up Pontiac. But he never quit looking. Ever
since the Levis factory closed, he'd been unemployed, and with
winter raging on, the chill had finally hit home. It was a lonely
road. Not very many people had a reason to be on it, unless
they were leaving. Most of his friends had already left. They
had families to feed and dreams to fulfill. But he stayed on.
After all, this was where he buried his mother and father. He
was born here and knew the country. He could go down this
road blind, and tell you what was on either side, and with his
headlights not working, that came in handy. It was starting to
get dark and light snow flurries were coming down. He'd better
get a move on. You know, he almost didn't see the old lady,
stranded on the side of the road. But even in the dim light of
day, he could see she needed help. So he pulled up in front of
her Mercedes and got out. His Pontiac was still sputtering when
he approached her. Even with the smile on his face, she was
worried. No one had stopped to help for the last hour or so.
Was he going to hurt her? He didn't look safe, he looked poor
and hungry. He could see that she was frightened, standing out
there in the cold. He knew how she felt. It was that chill that
only fear can put in you. He said, "I'm here to help you m'am.
Why don't you wait in the car where it's warm. By the way, my
name is Joe." Well, all she had was a flat tire, but for an old
lady, that was bad enough Joe crawled under the car looking
for a place to put the jack, skinning his knuckles a time or two.
Soon he was able to change the tire. But he had to get dirty
and his hands hurt. As he was tightening up the lug nuts, she
rolled down her window and began to talk to him. She told him
that she was from St. Louis and was only just passing through.
She couldn't thank him enough for coming to her aid. Joe just
smiled as he closed her trunk.

She asked him how much she owed him. Any amount would
have been alright with her. She had already imagined all the
awful things that could have happened had he not stopped. Joe
never thought twice about the money. This was not a job to
him. This was helping someone in need, and God knows there
were plenty who had given him a hand in the past. He had lived
his whole life that way, and it never occurred to him to act any
other way. He told her that if she really wanted to pay him
back, the next time she saw someone who needed help, she
could give that person the assistance that they needed, and Joe
added "...and think of me".

He waited until she started her car and drove off. It had been a
cold and depressing day, but he felt good as he headed for
home, disappearing into the twilight. A few miles down the road
the lady saw a small cafe. She went in to grab a bite to eat,
and take the chill off before she made the last leg of her trip
home. It was a dingy looking restaurant. Outside were two old
gas pumps. The whole scene was unfamiliar to her. The cash
register was like the telephone of an out of work actor, it didn't
ring much. Her waitress came over and brought a clean towel
to wipe her wet hair. She had a sweet smile, one that even
being on her feet for the whole day couldn't erase. The lady
noticed that the waitress was nearly eight months pregnant,
but she never let the strain and aches change her attitude. The
old lady wondered how someone who had so little could be so
giving to a stranger. Then she remembered Joe. After the lady
finished her meal, and the waitress went to get her change
from a hundred dollar bill, the lady slipped right out the door.
She was gone by the time the waitress came back. She
wondered where the lady could be, then she noticed something
written on a napkin. There were tears in her eyes, when she
read what the lady wrote. It said, "You don't owe me a thing,
I've been there too. Someone once helped me out, the way I'm
helping you. If you really want to pay me back, here's what you
do. Don't let the chain of love end with you." Well, there were
tables to clear, sugar bowls to fill, and people to serve, but the
waitress made it through another day. That night when she got
home from work and climbed into bed, she was thinking about
the money and what the lady had written. How could she have
known how much she and her husband needed it? With the
baby due next month, it was going to be hard. She knew how
worried her husband was, and as he lay sleeping next to her,
she gave him a soft kiss and whispered soft and low,
"Everything's gonna be alright, I love you Joe."


À


The first day of school our professor introduced himself and

challenged us to get to know someone we didn't already know.
I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my
shoulder. I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady
beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her entire being.

She said, "Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I'm eighty seven

years old. Can I give you a hug?" I laughed and enthusiastically
responded, "Of course you may!" and she gave me a giant
squeeze.

"Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I

asked. She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband,
get married, have a couple of children, and then retire and
travel." "No seriously," I asked. I was curious what may have
motivated her to betaking on this challenge at her age. "I
always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm
getting one!" she told me. After class we walked to the student
union building and shared a chocolate milkshake. We became
instant friends. Every day for the next three months we would
leave class together and talk nonstop. I was always
mesmerized listening to this "time machine" as she shared her
wisdom and experience with me.
Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and
easily made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress up
and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the
other students. She was living it up.

At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our

football banquet and I'll never forget what she taught us. She
was introduced and stepped up to the podium. As she began to
deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five
cards on the floor. Frustrated and a little embarrassed she
leaned into the microphone and simply said "I'm sorry. I'm so
jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me!
I'll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you
what I know." As we laughed she cleared her throat and
began:

"We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old

because we stop playing. There are only four secrets to staying
young, being happy, and achieving success.

"You have to laugh and find humor every day. You've got to
have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die. We have
so many people walking around who are dead and don't even
know it!"

"There is a huge difference between growing older and growing

up. If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year
and don't do one protective thing, you will turn twenty years
old. If I am eighty seven years old and stay in bed for a year
and never do anything I will turn eighty eight. Anybody can
grow older. That doesn't take any talent or ability. The idea is
to grow up by always finding the opportunity in change." "Have
no regrets. The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we
did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who
fear death are those with regrets."

She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The Rose."

She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out
in our daily lives.

At the years end Rose finished the college degree she had
begun all those years ago. One week after graduation Rose
died peacefully in her sleep.

Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in

tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that
it's never too late to be all you can possibly be.
å
À


Everyone in the apartment complex I lived in knew who Ugly

was. Ugly was the resident tomcat. Ugly loved three things in
this world: fighting, eating garbage, and shall we say, love. The
combination of these things combined with a life spent outside
had their effect on Ugly.

To start with, he had only one eye, and where the other should
have been was a gaping hole. He was also missing his ear on
the same side, his left foot has appeared to have been badly
broken at one time, and had healed at an unnatural angle,
making him look like he was always turning the corner.

His tail has long since been lost, leaving only the smallest stub,
which he would constantly jerk and twitch. Ugly would have
been a dark gray tabby striped-type, except for the sores
covering his head, neck, even his shoulders with thick,
yellowing scabs. Every time someone saw Ugly there was the
same reaction. "That's one ugly cat!"

All the children were warned not to touch him, the adults threw
rocks at him, hosed him down, squirted him when he tried to
come in their homes, or shut his paws in the door when he
would not leave. Ugly always had the same reaction. If you
turned the hose on him, he would stand there, getting soaked
until you gave up and quit. If you threw things at him, he
would curl his lanky body around feet in forgiveness. Whenever
he spied children, he would come running meowing frantically
and bump his head against their hands, begging for their love.
If you ever picked him up he would immediately begin suckling
on your shirt, earrings, whatever he could find.

One day Ugly shared his love with the neighbors huskies. They
did not respond kindly, and Ugly was badly mauled. From my
apartment I could hear his screams, and I tried to rush to his
aid. By the time I got to where he was laying, it was apparent
Ugly's sad life was almost at an end.

Ugly lay in a wet circle, his back legs and lower back twisted
grossly out of shape, a gaping tear in the white strip of fur that
ran down his front. As I picked him up and tried to carry him
home I could hear him wheezing and gasping, and could feel
him struggling. I must be hurting him terribly I thought. Then I
felt a familiar tugging, sucking sensation on my ear- Ugly, in so
much pain, suffering and obviously dying was trying to suckle
my ear. I pulled him closer to me, and he bumped the palm of
my hand with his head, then he turned his one golden eye
towards me, and I could hear the distinct sound of purring.
Even in the greatest pain, that ugly battled-scarred cat was
asking only for a little affection, perhaps some compassion.

At that moment I thought Ugly was the most beautiful, loving

creature I had ever seen. Never once did he try to bite or
scratch me, or even try to get away from me, or struggle in
any way. Ugly just looked up at me completely trusting in me
to relieve his pain.

Ugly died in my arms before I could get inside, but I sat and
held him for a long time afterwards, thinking about how one
scarred, deformed little stray could so alter my opinion about
what it means to have true pureness of spirit, to love so totally
and truly. Ugly taught me more about giving and compassion
than a thousand books, lectures, or talk show specials ever
could, and for that I will always be thankful.

He had been scarred on the outside, but I was scarred on the

inside, and it was time for me to move on and learn to love
truly and deeply. To give my total to those I cared for.

Many people want to be richer, more successful, well liked,

beautiful, but for me, I will always try to be Ugly.
 


 
©
J




 
À


When Joe's wife ran away with his car, his money and his best
friend, he got so depressed that his doctor sent him to see a
psychiatrist.

Joe told the psychiatrist his troubles and said, "Life isn't worth
living. I think I'm gonna top myself."
"Don't be stupid, Joe," said the psychiatrist. "My wife ran off
and left me too, yet I'm happy."

"How?" asked Joe.

"Easy," replied the quack. "I threw myself into my work. I

totally submerged myself in my job and soon forgot her. By the
way, Joe, what work do you do?"

"I clean out septic tanks." Joe replied.



 





À Anaya

I Will Always Remember

I will always remember that day when we first met and when
you were taken away from me. That dread full day. But today
is that day that I must say what¶s been hiding in me. I will tell
my story to you, to your grave stone, to your soul that still
lives on, to that look-a-like cloud that I saw that day.

It was that day, in January, when the principle told us that we

had to sit with our homerooms. That was when I noticed you. It
was like love at first sight, but I couldn¶t, wouldn¶t tell anyone
until I knew your name. I asked tons of my friends, till I came
to Cecily, she said that your name was Mike. Mike. I said your
name over and over.

Then that day a few days later your were waiting to go into
science, in front of my locker talking to Jay. I said´ Could you
please move.´ And you did and it was my first words that I said
to you. The next day, I think it was in second period, you were
standing with Luke, Ethan, and Jay. I remember poor Ethan
getting punched. I said ³Hey guys can I get to my locker?´
Ryan said ³Uh no.´

So all I did was move you guys and got to my locker. I opened
it and you looked in and saw my locker and which was such a
mess. But you didn¶t care. I couldn¶t stop thinking about you,
and I still can¶t, I guess it was your.... I have to stop thinking
about this, I¶m going to get tears on my paper.

Then the second to last day, you were sitting in back of Caitlin,
I remember I had I love M. on my hand and, well you saw it,
and me acting like I wanted to kill Billy. I was surprised you
weren¶t discussed. Seriously I was.

In 8th grade I never saw you. You were in the smart people
team, and well you know I wasn¶t that, well, smart only in the
summer, and everybody knew that. I only saw you at lunch. I
couldn¶t wait till then. I thought about you 24/7, it was getting
to much.

In 9th I got to really know you, because you were in all of my

classes, and we hung out, and were going out.

I remember the night out to the movies, we snuck in and

nobody found out. It was the best night ever. But I think the
best time was just hanging out at the park on Becca¶s birthday,
you, me, and well everyone else but that was a special night,
we really had fun.

That night we played like every game in the world to about

1:00. Your parents didn¶t care they knew me very well. Then
we watched The Others and Thirteen Ghosts. I was so scared
but you held me, and I felt so much better. I felt safe, the first
time I felt safe with a guy. I knew we would be together for a
long time.

In the 10th grade, we were still going strong together, nobody

could break us apart. Even if we had a few fights, but every
good relationship has a little down side. I was learning how to
drive (uh the hardest thing in my life.) I really didn¶t get to see
you, I was in Las Vegas for most of the summer, that was the
hardest summer ever.

In the 11th it was hard, we were preparing for our last year of
high school and then collage, we never thought we would get
out of it alive. But we went through it perfectly, and guess what
no detention, well maybe for our friends but that didn¶t matter.
We spent that summer together, in New Jersey, which was so
much fun, even if it was with our families.

In the 12th we celebrating, it was fun, our last year, and we

were all right, still strong with our heart and mind and for our
time together, our parents thought that night that we were
going to get married with out them knowing, but we wouldn¶t
go and do that. They gave us to much support, and plus I knew
what I wanted, and I didn¶t want to go that. You were ok with
that. Our friends said that this was something special.

When we both were 21, we started going to clubs. We didn¶t go

alone just in case, well you know. Our friends always came and
things like that.

But it was that night I will remember. That cold, snowy night.
Tony was like, gggggrrrrrr.... because of what he had to drink.
He said get in to me and you. I didn¶t go because Mandee and I
were waiting for Becca. I told you to wait to, but you said that
you would be fine.

When Becca came, we followed you two. We were wondering

were Tony was taking us, I told him to go to my house but
instead was going to his. He swerved and hit a another car and
we got out and well, you weren¶t OK.
I called the ambulance, it took them 20 min. I took of my
jacket and put it on you, rubbing your hand and told you it
would be all right. When we got into your room, an hour later,
the doctor said that it was to late that you had gone. I cried
and cried. It had also, been to late for Tony too.

Mandee, dove Becca and I home, was crying my heart out, I

couldn¶t stop. I kept saying ³ I told you, I told you. I told you
not to go.´

I was thinking to myself that night that I should have gone with
you, so I could be with you. I¶m now writing in ³the crying
room.´ And I am crying. Trying to calm myself down but it¶s not
going to work.

When I got out of Collage I started to work with this program,

it teaches about the effects of people driving drunk, and I used
you as an example. I don't cry as much anymore. But when I
tell my story a lot of people do.

And I still miss you. I come by once in a while, not everyday

again. I still sit and talk about the good and bad times.

I will always remember, your face, your smile. I will always

remember You


î

À Francis

One particular thought is always coming to my mind.

I heard it is very romantic to go to deck and sit on the chair

with long space in front for keeping the legs.

I would like to go to the deck with my partner with two glasses

and a bottle of red wine. we will stretch ourselves on the
chairs, with our legs stretched on the long space. we would feel
the cold breeze from the sea passing through our bodies. We
can enjoy the blue sky on the clouds. we will have a glass of
wine and we would engage in romantic talk.

I will take and hold her hand and raise her hand to my face and
slowly caress her palm and start biting romantically the fingers.
Then she will take my hand and place it on her waist. I will
slowly caress her waist. we both can feel the electricity passing
through our bodies.

We will get up and go near the rails to watch the sea. My

partner will put her lovely head on my shoulder. My hand will
go behind her back and start stroking her back. We will share
one more glasses of wine. slowly she will squeeze her body
towards me. I could feel the warmth of her. I will raise her chin
with my hand and we both will look deep into each others eyes.
Now she will raise her head so that i can kiss her on her
forehead, later on her closed eyes, on her cheeks and behind
the ears. She willl run her hand through my hair behind the
head. Slowly, i will put my lips on her warm lips and we both
will start kissing. She will come forward and hug me. My hands
will stroke her back, She will hold me tightly. We both could
feel the warmth of each other's bodies. We will start breathing
faster. Soon, the pleasure will become unbearable and we will
go back to our room and lock the door
î

À
Unknown

It was last year when I met him during a school carnival. I was
walking with my friend into the school of business when she
bumped into her classmates. I didn't know what actually
happened but I remembered I was staring at this particular guy
in the group. From that day onwards, he never left my mind.

After months of consideration, I finally took the first step. I

wrote a letter to him confessing I actually was attracted by him
and if we could be friends. I got my friend to pass him the
letter and we started being friends.

At first, he didn't know what I looked like as he didn't

remember seeing me. One day, my friend tricked me into going
to her computer lab. He was there. It was then we first met
and spoke. He shook my hand and introduced himself. Ever
since then, I started seeing more of him.

I started sending him messages to his cell phone daily. It could

be a daily good-night message or just to tell him to take care.
He would usually reply to my messages. One day, after the
exams, I finally asked him out. We went to eat dinner and after
that, we went back to school at night and sat at the exit
staircase staring at the stars, drinking and chatting. It was then
I felt that I was really in love with this guy. He sent me home
later. From that day on, I could not get him out of my mind.

Somehow, I started seeing him quite often. He works at

Starbucks so I would go there to study and hang out. Hanging
out was just an excuse for me to see him. We would bump into
each other in school daily and smile and say Hi. Sometimes, we
would joke around and just chat.
During Christmas, I bought a gift for him. It took me some time
to actually pass it to him. He was appreciative. In return, he
gave me a wallet. At first, I was joyful. Then, I found out he
gave my friend a Christmas present too when she hadn't
bought him anything. But that didn't mean anything to me.
Receiving a gift from him was all I could think of.

Months later, after our second trip to the movies we started

seeing each other less and the messages became less. After 4
months, I finally got my friend to ask whether he liked me or
he knew my feelings for him. All the while, she wanted to ask
him that but I wasn't ready to face the truth. Deep down in my
heart, I actually knew the answer but I couldn't face up to
reality. After 4 months, I felt I was ready.

I got my answer. He rejected me. He didn't like me. However,

my friend didn't tell me that. Instead, she got another friend to
tell me the answer over the phone. I kept silent and tears
started falling from my eyes. The tears just kept falling. It
didn't stop.

My heart was shattered. It left a scar behind. I no longer can

love. I no longer can face him. To me, love was a mistake. But
I would never regret ever loving him.
î



i felt the rejection every time i fall in love but it doesn't mean that i have to
discontinue loving..though it hurts like hell knowing that it's not you who he
wanted to be with but atleast it's better that having him around you but wanted
someone else..and if your heart is already crushed, see the brighter side cause
numb people don't feel anything, even pain...what matters most is how you deal
with it after it tears you apart..one day you'll find that someone who will fix
your broken heart, your broken self.a person who will bring you back to life.. ~
manilyn bermas

ñ



J 
©




À
Unknown

She was sitting there. in the front row of the classroom.. She
was the hyperactive chatty gal that I would love to loathe...

At first sight, there was simply nothing extraordinary about her.

I was annoyed at her seemingly uncontrollable mischievous
personality. But then again, I looked beyond that and
recognized her warm and mature personality... And that her
large brown eyes enthralled me....Captivating me with her
sweet and jovial smile...

I fell in love with her........

There was only one thing I can... and must... do... I gotta let
her know how I feel.. I did, and that's the start of a wonderful,
forever lasting love... or at least that's what I thought.

Those were the happiest times of my life. I would call her

numerous times a day..... Life for me was heavenly. I had
always dreamt of loving my other significant half to the max,
even when I was a young child. This was a dream come true
for me. She was almost the perfect girl I had dreamt about
before. She loved me as much as I love her (I still do...). I
would embrace her tightly to feel her warmth and kiss softly on
her forehead. I long to be with her forever. Words alone could
not describe the blissful times I had with her. Her distinctive
voice would just banish my blues away. We never squabbled
before. Life is truly a heaven to experience such a true love.
For me, true love is always 0.1% lust, 0.9% attraction and
99.0% appreciation. I had always appreciated her and so did
she.

Those times went on for 2 years. But then, the inevitable

happened. She became aloof, unresponsive and her cheerful
disposition had diminished. "What happened to her"? I asked
myself...Gradually, she lessen her phone calls to me. I tried
coaxing her to talk to me but to no avail. Then, after weeks of
coaxing, she finally told me that she had changed (she didn't
know why, it just came all of a sudden). She told me that our
characters do not match and sad to say that we should not
continue the relationship. She implied that I'm a person who
does not care much about the world around me (which is quite
true as I don't trust friends and I'm quite a loner) She also said
that there are small little things that also add up to her
unhappiness. I was devastated... I didn't know that she felt
that way all this time... Well, I knew about my weaknesses but
I thought that she accepted them. I cried and pleaded her to
stay on with me but to no avail as it was only the most sensible
thing for a matured person (such as herself) to do. She said
that its better for us to separate rather than go deeper into an
unhappy relationship than is doomed to failure (which is, sad to
say, true). I am still in a deep depressed state. Its been 4
months since she broke up with me...

How I hope to be with her again. Its actually not her fault. She
was doing the only sensible thing (to break up before we go
any deeper). Sometimes, I feel like life's fragile.....

A beautiful thing like love can be ended abruptly Feels like a

precious thing had been taken away from me...
Just like a beautiful rose that withered away....
J



î





À






Walking down a path through some woods in Georgia, I saw a

water puddle ahead on the path. I angled my direction to go
around it on the part of the path that wasn't covered by water
and mud. As I reached the puddle, I was suddenly attacked!
Yet I did nothing for the attack was so unpredictable and from
a source so totally unexpected. I was startled as well as unhurt,
despite having been struck four or five times already. I backed
up a foot and my attacker stopped attacking me. Instead of
attacking more, he hovered in the air on graceful butterfly
wings in front of me. Had I been hurt I wouldn't have found it
amusing, but I was unhurt, it was funny, and I was laughing.
After all, I was being attacked by a butterfly!

Having stopped laughing, I took a step forward. My attacker

rushed me again. He rammed me in the chest with his head
and body, striking me over and over again with all his might,
still to no avail. For a second time, I retreated a step while my
attacker relented in his attack. Yet again, I tried moving
forward. My attacker charged me again. I was rammed in the
chest over and over again. I wasn't sure what to do, other than
to retreat a third time. After all, it's just not everyday that one
is attacked by a butterfly. This time, though, I stepped back
several paces to look the situation over. My attacker moved
back as well to land on the ground. That's when I discovered
why my attacker was charging me only moments earlier. He
had a mate and she was dying. She was beside the puddle
where he landed.

Sitting close beside her, he opened and closed his wings as if to

fan her. I could only admire the love and courage of that
butterfly in his concern for his mate. He had taken it upon
himself to attack me for his mate's sake, even though she was
clearly dying and I was so large. He did so just to give her
those extra few precious moments of life, should I have been
careless enough to step on her. Now I knew why and what he
was fighting for. There was really only one option left for me. I
carefully made my way around the puddle to the other side of
the path, though it was only inches wide and extremely muddy.
His courage in attacking something thousands of times larger
and heavier than himself just for his mate's safety justified it. I
couldn't do anything other than reward him by walking on the
more difficult side of the puddle. He had truly earned those
moments to be with her, undisturbed.
I left them in peace for those last few moments, cleaning the
mud from my boots when I later reached my car.

Since then, I've always tried to remember the courage of that

butterfly whenever I see huge obstacles facing me. I use that
butterfly's courage as an inspiration and to remind myself that
good things are worth fighting for.





©


À




My friend John always has something to tell me. He knows so

much that young men have to have older and more worldly
wise men to tell them. For instance who to trust, how to care
for others, and how to live life to the fullest.

Recently, John lost his wife Janet. For eight years she fought
against cancer, but in the end her sickness had the last word.

One day John took out a folded piece of paper from his wallet.
He had found it, so he told me, when he tidied up some
drawers at home. It was a small love letter Janet had written.
The note could look like a school girl's scrawls about her dream
guy. All that was missing was a drawing of a heart with the
names John and Janet written in it. But the small letter was
written by a woman who had had seven children; a woman who
fought for her life and who probably only had a few months left
to live.

It was also a beautiful recipe for how to keep a marriage

together.

Janet's description of her husband begins thus: "Loved me.

Took care of me. Worried about me."

Even though John always had a ready answer, he never joked

about cancer apparently. Sometimes he came home in the
evening to find Janet in the middle of one of those depressions
cancer patients so often get. In no time he got her into the car
and drove her to her favourite restaurant.

He showed consideration for her, and she knew it. You cannot
hide something for someone who knows better.

"Helped me when I was ill," the next line reads. Perhaps Janet
wrote this while the cancer was in one of the horrible and
wonderful lulls. Where everything is -- almost -- as it used to
be, before the sickness broke out, and where it doesn't hurt to
hope that everything is over, maybe forever.

"Forgave me a lot."

"Stood by my side."

And a piece of good advice for everyone who looks on giving

constructive criticism as a kind of sacred duty: "Always
praising."

"Made sure I had everything I needed," she goes on to write.

After that she has turned over the paper and added: "Warmth.
Humour. Kindness. Thoughtfulness." And then she writes about
the husband she has lived with and loved the most of her life:
"Always there for me when I needed you."

The last words she wrote sum up all the others. I can see her
for me where she adds thoughtfully: "Good friend."

I stand beside John now, and cannot even pretend to know how
it feels to lose someone who is as close to me as Janet was to
him. I need to hear what he has to say much more than he
needs to talk.

"John," I ask. "How do you stick together with someone

through 38 years -- not to mention the sickness? How do I
know if I can bear to stand by my wife's side if she becomes
sick one day?"

"You can," he says quietly. "If you love her enough, you can."



©



À


Then, I would never have believed that ten years after we split
I would still think of him. The scientist in me is always
surprised to rediscover this fact: That a person can truly be
broken. Forever. There is no ³It was for the best´ here; no hard
earned wisdom that I am glad I came by. Our split was simply
a complete and utter destruction of my person. Life can be that
way. Eventually you have to move on; Life, again, compels
you. And, after all, I wanted to be happy again. So, you pick up
what¶s left, reinvent what isn¶t and go on.

I think the specter of our breakup has changed me far more

than our
relationship. Away from the warm glow of naivete, the
memories of us seem trite. It is true that only we assign
meaning to our experiences. On paper they mean nothing. We
went camping with my family. I snuck clandestine visits to his
house after school. He biked out to my house in the middle of
the night. We hung out with his friends. He got the chicken
pox. We made out in the hallways at school and passed notes.
We drove - a lot, we drank some, we smoked pot once. And of
course we had sex, my first. We were in going to be married,
you see.

Mostly, we had no fear. We talked about ourselves, our

dreams, our
childhoods, our parents. Each discussion was a wonderful
opening, with no fear of what we might discover or lose. Every
fact, every feeling shared was a precious thing to be cherished
and savored. Our universe did not understand the possibility of
loss.

Eventually, there was another. There always is in these stories.

She took him away with a kiss. To explain the complete and
utter vacancy of the following months would be difficult. At
least there were tangible side effects: the loss of 25 pounds,
the withdrawal, the tears, and tears, and tears. To this day I
have not replenished them. Only after I rebuilt myself did he
want me back. But the me had that had been was lost.

It is more than ten years later. The person he missed hasn¶t

returned. I don¶t think she will. I look for her sometimes, in
boxes of old things, but she is never there. The beach is my
place now. It is small consolation for a lost self. I know now
that our relationship was far from perfect. I know what he has
done with his life, and what I have done with mine, and
logically, I understand them to be incompatible. What I really
miss is the me that didn¶t consider such things.

I see him in dreams sometimes. We approach, we talk; we are

never
lovers. In my dreams we travel asymptotic paths; never
crossing, almost touching, our current lives the tiny infinite gap
between us. I like my life now. It makes me happy. But above
all, I can never forgive him. It¶s not that he was perfect. It¶s
not that we were perfect. It¶s simply that he was my
Everything, and he chose to leave.
J
©


J 

À
 


A married couple came to a counselor for advice. No sooner

were they seated, than they began speaking at the same time
in a duel of criticisms. When they finally stopped for lack of
breath, the counselor suggested that now they tell each other
all the good they see in one another.

There was total silence.

Then each was given a ball-point pen and a sheet of paper and
told to write down something praiseworthy about the other.
Neither of them wrote. They both sat and stared at the paper.
After what seemed like a long time, the husband started to
write something. At once the wife also began to write--fast and
furiously. Finally, the writing stopped.

There was silence again.

The wife pushed her paper over to the watching counselor. He

pushed it back signaling that she was to give it directly to her
husband. She reluctantly shoved the paper halfway across the
table. He took it and in turn, slid his paper towards his wife.
Each began to read.

The counselor watched...Soon a tear slid down the cheek of his

wife. She crumpled the paper in her fist and held it tight. That
proved that she treasured the sudden revelation of good things
her husband had expressed about her. The whole atmosphere
of the room changed. There was no need for anything to be
said. Praise had healed a thousand wounds.

The husband and wife left arm in arm.





 







ñ


À
 

My first wife used to cover me with red lipstick kisses

before we made love. I must admit, it really turned
me on. I would watch her applying it while standing in
front of a mirror. After finishing, she would turn to me
and begin kissing me all over my face and neck.

One night we had a terrible argument after having too

much to drink at a party. I'm embarrassed to admit it,
but she had bruised my male ego. The party we had
been at was both indoors and out. There was a bad
mitten net in the backyard and we started playing. At
first, we just volleyed back and forth, but then started
a game. Some women started watching us and
keeping score. The first game was close, but she
pulled ahead toward the end and won 15 - 12,
receiving a loud applause from the women spectators.
During the second game, the women started really
getting into the game, calling it a battle of sexes.
When she won decisively (15 - 7), they cheered all the
louder. I started to walk off the playing field, thinking
we had played enough when my wife yelled out;
"What's the matter, afraid to get beaten by a woman
in front of everyone?". I agreed to play another game
and got soundly trounced. I think it was around 15 -
3. We stayed about two more hours and consumed
more margueritas than we should have.

While we were driving home, she kept talking about

how much fun it had been. My replies were short and
with a bit of an edge. After a while, she became angry
about my attitude and things started to escalate.
When we got home, it got much worse. At some point,
I said something really ugly and she whirled around
and socked me right in the eye, knocking me flat on
the floor. I'm not sure if I was knocked unconscious or
not, but the next thing I new, I got hit with my pillow,
which she had thrown. She stormed off upstairs and
locked our bedroom door. I staggered over to a sofa
and fell asleep.

I really should have put ice on my eye before falling

asleep because in the morning, it was almost swollen
shut. My eye was all bloodshot and the bruising
around it was dark black and blue. I was so mad at
my wife. How was I going to explain this very black
and swollen eye to everyone in the coming week? I
think my wife was a little shocked when she saw what
she had done. However, she didn't say anything and
we stayed clear of each other for most of the day. In
the evening I was watching a football when my wife
came in the room dressed rather provocatively and
with her red lipstick on. She sat down next to me. I
tried to ignore her and watch the gave, but then she
began kissing me. I kept trying to hold on to my anger
but she was wearing me down. After a couple of
minutes, I took a glance at our reflection in a mirror
on the wall. She looked at the mirror the same time
and our eyes met. I probably had a dozen red lipstick
all over my checks, forehead, neck, everywhere
except close to the black eye. (It was real sore.) We
both broke up laughing. Then we started laughing
about the whole situation, the bad mitten game, the
argument, and the black eye. She went and got her
camera and set up a timed picture of us embracing -
me with my black eye and covered with lipstick kisses.
She had it framed and used to show it to her friends
and tell them the story behind it. Funny thing, neither
of us could remember what I had said before she let
me have it. While telling the story, she used to say;
"we can't remember what he said, but whatever it
was, he knows better than to say it again".

We didn't over-indulge ourselves with alcohol very

much after that. I learned not to say hurtful or
damaging things when we argued. Also, I worked at
overcoming my fragile male ego. Fact was, she was a
better athlete than I and regularly beat me in tennis,
bad mitten, volleyball, ping pong... you name it. She
even beat me a few times arm wrestling. I didn't mind
so much, as long as it was just between us. She came
to realize that she had a hot temper and worked to
mellow out some. She also came to a better
understanding of the male ego and easily it could be
bruised. I loved that woman.

I lost my her to breast cancer after 13 years of

marriage. I sure to miss her.
c
J







I had been widowed for 3 1/2 years when my dearest friend
arrived for a visit with her latest husband of 6 years for she
wanted so much for us to meet before her death as she was
facing her last days here on this earth. Well he was a very nice
looking man , a cowboy really and a long haul truck driver so
we struck up a nice friendly relationship that made my dear
friend very happy and said to me when my time comes please
do not let him be alone , I made her this promise never
realizing that he would after a period of grieving for her ask me
to come and live with him.

The way he approached me was by telling me he had a big

surprise for me as his late wife had planned this vacation of a
sort for the two of us to be had after her dearth. Shocked
beyond belief I accepted his invitation as this was one her last
wishes. But he was not to tell me where we were to go just
pack a bag for a week and trust him to do as she had
requested. So with some skepticism I packed my bag and
waited for him to pick me up and off we went taking over 5
hours to arrive at out final destination at the Horse Shoe
Casino, well let me tell you I was like a child set loose in a
candy store as I had never been in one before and all of the
excitement made all of the adrenaline flow like magic and I
became very at ease with the situation .

We spent a lovely week together and talked of many things one

of which he said he was not going to be alone and had chosen
me as his companion for the balance of our lives if I would but
accept him . I told him I had to give this a lot of consideration
as I had never planned on marrying again so he let me know
what was ahead for me and would wait for my reply. We wrote
back and forth and talked on the phone almost every night as
he was out on his trips across the country and would relate to
me all of the things he was seeing so I could feel as if I was
there with him to enjoy them as well. Knowing I was so
fascinated and intrigued by his stories he asked if I would like
to take a trip on his next run out West with him so I accepted
and much to my delight I found I loved the open road as he
would take extra pains to see I could enjoy a new and exciting
place each morning and night as we traveled together . He was
so sweet and caring I could not help but fall madly in love with
him and accepted his marriage proposal when he got down on
one knee and asked to take his name and be his wife. Granted
as he had said to me she will always hold a special place in my
heart but I have found my long awaited soul mate .

We made a number of trips over the country and I had moved

to his home where we shared so many wonderful dreams and
plans of our future together. After we both felt that enough
time had elapsed we set the date for our marriage and set
about making all of the final little details of a glorious wedding ,
and on the night just 3 hours before his untimely death we had
sat and said to one another " well nether of us will leave this
world alone, unloved or unwanted as we have one another " so
as he gently touched my face and said "I do love you with all of
my heart now and forever more so never leave me " and I
promised him I would always be here for him and he went in
and tried to sleep. After two hours of fretful rest he arose and
headed to the bathroom only to collapse in respiratory arrest
where I administered CPR and was able to have him up and
coherent when the medics arrived but he still was in need of
oxygen so he was placed in the ambulance with me at his side
and once he was in route to the hospital he said to me as his
last words ever spoken alive was " I love you babe , everything
is going to be alright so don't worry " but once said he went
into cardiac arrest never to come out of again and with being
placed on life support for 25 minutes he completely flat lined
leaving me behind to ride the roads all alone once more .

As I was placing him in the ground I felt this flutter about me

and glanced around to see this golden butterfly wing towards
heaven letting me know he was on the road again but to God's
highway this time. When he would awaken on the road he
would always say to me " come on babe it's time to be on the
road again " and off we would go so I know in my heart when
he awakens from this trip he will once again call out to me in
his usual manner " okay babe time to be on the road again"
and I will meet him at the gate and we will forever ride the
golden streets of heaven as we had planned . He had passed to
the other side just 3 weeks before our scheduled date of
earthly marriage but in my heart of hearts I was married to him
in the eyes of God for we had made out vows on a mountain
top to each other before God and even if we had never stood
before man and made this vow for on the eve of his passing he
had announced to all of his friends our date to be forever more
together. So on this day that was to be the date of our
proposed marriage I went to the cemetery where he is at rest
and made my vows once more to him in prayer to God so I
know our marriage is approved by God for as I said my prayer
another butterfly joined with another and they both flew
towards heaven side by side .
J







À



From the very Beginning, the girl's family objected strongly on

her dating this guy. Saying that it has got to do with family
background & that the girl will have to suffer for the rest of her
life if she were to be with him.
Due to family's pressure, the couple quarrel very often. Though
the girl love the guy deeply, but she always ask him: "How
deep is your love for me?" As the guy is not good with his
words, this often cause the girl to be very upset. With that &
the family's pressure, the girl often vent her anger on him. As
for him, he only endure it in silence.

After a couple of years, the guy finally graduated & decided to

further his studies in overseas. Before leaving, he proposed to
the girl: "I'm not very good with words. But all I know is that I
love you. If you allow me, I will take care of you for the rest of
my life. As for your family, I'll try my best to talk them round.
Will you marry me?"
The girl agreed, & with the guy's determination, the family
finally gave in & agreed to let them get married. So before he
leave, they got engaged.

The girl went out to the working society, whereas the guy was
overseas, continuing his studies. They sent their love through
emails & phone calls. Though it's hard, but both never thought
of giving up.

One day, while the girl was on her way to work, she was
knocked down by a car that lost control. When she woke up,
she saw her parents beside her bed. She realized that she was
badly injured. Seeing her mum crying, she wanted to comfort
her. But she realized that all that could come out of her mouth
was just a sigh. She has lost her voice......
The doctors says that the impact on her brain has caused her
to lose her voice. Listening to her parents' comfort, but with
nothing coming out from her, she broke down.

During the stay in hospital, besides silence cry,.....it's still just

silence cry that companied her. Upon reaching home,
everything seems to be the same. Except for the ringing tone
of the phone. Which pierced into her heart every time it rang.
She does not wish to let the guy know. & not wanting to be a
burden to him, she wrote a letter to him saying that she does
not wish to wait any longer. With that, she sent the ring back
to him. In return, the guy sent millions & millions of reply, and
countless of phone calls,.. all the girl could do, besides crying,
is still crying....The parents decided to move away, hoping that
she could eventually forget everything & be happy.

With a new environment, the girl learn sign language & started
a new life. Telling herself everyday that she must forget the
guy. One day, her friend came & told her that he's back. She
asked her friend not to let him know what happened to her.
Since then, there wasn't anymore news of him.

A year has passed & her friend came with an envelope,

containing an invitation card for the guy's wedding. The girl
was shattered. When she open the letter, she saw her name in
it instead.

When she was about to ask her friend what's going on, she saw
the guy standing in front of her. He used sign language telling
her "I've spent a year's time to learn sign language. Just to let
you know that I've not forgotten our promise. Let me have the
chance to be your voice. I Love You. With that, he slipped the
ring back into her finger. The girl finally smiled.
c
ñ

©

À

 

"Your so sweet, your so cute, know will you please pick up the
phone" my phone started ringing loudly.
" hello" i answered
"hi, you sleeping? did i disturb you!" Luke said he was in the
other end.
"n.....ope, i..was just....... anyways what happen you called?" i
replied
" remember you have to meet me today at six, we have to
finish that project and your my partner?" he said
" yeah! i will be there on time..... bye... take care" i hurriedly
ran to bathroom. it was already five fifteen by then.
Luke and i are friends from our CST101 class.

i ran the bell of Luke's door at sharp six. Luke live with his
parents. he had two brothers only.
most of the time they were always out. i see them very rarely
in the house.

Luke opened the door and let me in. as i set on the sofa i saw
someone coming from Luke's bedroom.
he was tall, had dark hair, brown eyes and was wearing a shirt
and jeans. actually he was handsome.
he was calling to Luke. then Luke went to him and they had a
small chat and again he went into Luke's room.

Luke saw me staring at him and he came to me to answer my

questions. sitting near me Luke took our project papers and
said to me " bella, he is my best friend, last night he arrived
from his land, know stop staring at him and let's do this
project".
" yeah!" i replied but still my eyes were on the door of Luke's
room.
i couldn't concentrate on the project at all. it seems to me he
will come out at any minute. but he never came out while i was
there.

after coming home also i couldn't think of anything else.

every time i close my eyes i saw him, my heart says i need to
talk him and meet him. i was out of word why i am thinking
about him so much. at that night i thought of calling Luke and
ask him about his friend, but i couldn't. i was afraid about what
will Luke say to me. so i decided next day after collage i will go
to Luke's house and talk to him about all that happened.

so the next day after collage i asked Luke whether i could go

his home to borrow some papers of project, so that i can do
that part of project from my home. Luke said that i could go
but he cant, because he had to go to meet dean about
something.

so without anymore words i made my way happily to Luke's

house. i was shaking my self as well as i was feeling happy
because Luke couldn't come with me. as i hit the bell button,
the handsome opened the door. i was out of words ...... he
answered "Luke is not here"
i replied" i ... know i came to get so...me pap...ers!"

"k " he replied and fly to Luke's room.

i slowly followed him to Luke's room. Before i could open the
door a lady opened the door and said "hi!"
with a shock i replied "hi"
then the handsome came behind the women with a lovely three
month old baby in his hand and said," sweets, this is the friend
of Luke i told you about."
the women," your bella, i am Meggie, Dylan's wife"

i was stud by what i heard and without taking another steps

forward i turned and ran out of Luke's house.
my heart was in such a pain that i couldn't stop crying myself
at all.
it was like someone has broken my heart without any
mercy......

it took me few years to believe that the man i ever wanted was
already of someone!!!!!!!
Ú