Part 1: Reflection on Essay 3

1. Based upon the amount of time you spend writing the essay (fulfilling all elements of the
process, from freewriting to outlining to participating in a peer response workshop), as
well as my comments overall, are you surprised by the grade your essay received? Why
or why not?
I’m actually very proud of the grade I received. I worked very hard and I know that I tried my
best in this essay. I could have gotten a better grade if I would have spent more time focusing
on making my analysis even strong where I lacked. But overall I am proud of my work on this
essay.
2. Select ONE part of your essay in which you did well, based upon my comments,
annotations, and the notes from the rubric. What did you do well and how do you plan on
building upon that strength of your writing.
Introduction has to be one of my strongest paragraphs. Based on my comments I introduced the
commonly ideal of the dream, and then showed the reality of the dream which was a great lead
in Coates argument. I also gave a good summary of the book and a background on the reasons
why Coates agues what he argues.
I think the one thing that I did differently in this essay was printing out my rough draft and
proofread and markup annotate the paper. This helped me add and change around the wording
that I won’t have catch if reading the essay on a laptop.
3. Using the categories of the rubric, select what you think are your ​TOP 3 categories for
improvement​. In other words, ​what areas of the essay do you think you most need
to focus on in order to develop that part of the essay for Essay 4?​ Why do you think
you struggled with this category in Essay 3? ​Categories include:
○ Scope/Definition of Task
○ Introduction- topic and context
○ Introduction- thesis
○ Organization
○ Body Paragraphs: Focus
○ Body Paragraphs: Evidence and Support
○ Body Paragraphs: Analysis
I think I struggles in adding more Analysis to my paragraphs because, I feared that I would be
repeating myself and give more of Coates’ ideas rather than mine.
○ Conclusion
In general I am not the best at conclusion, I gave have. I think this is the area in which I still do
need to improve on the most in my writing progress.
○ Sentence Variety
In this essay I did focus of trying to give more of a sentence variety, which made my essay a lot
more stronger. But i do think I could’ve done better in this category, than I did.
○ Editing and MLA

4. Select​ two comments or questions I made in my annotations​ that you find helpful in
understanding how you can improve your writing for the next essay. Write the comment
 (quote me) and then write a response to that comment that shows what you understand
about how to improve your essay because of that comment.
C#1: “Focus on starting your argument with CLAIMS- statements that voice an assertion or
opinion as it relates to or develops your thesis-- not a question. What is the topic of this
paragraph? The language in our Constitution? The history of this language? The hypocrisy?
And what are you saying about this topic? These are the questions to think about when you are
writing out your claim. Try not to start a new claim with INFORMATION or a QUESTION-- but
rather, an assertion”(Huerta).
This comment was left after I started a paragraph with a rhetorical question. I now understand
why adding a question as a topic sentence weakening my argument rather than making it more
stronger. Also I understand why it is important to start with a claim to later help prove with my
analysis.

C#2: “This is a great example of your point-- but where is your citation? You must cite all ideas
that are not originally your own!” (Huerta).
This comment was made after I forgot to cite Coates on this idea. This totally passed me since
in that paragraph was really on his argument on the black body which I kept on citing. This
comment helped me remember to be careful in the editing process before turning in my essays.

5. What questions do you have about how to improve any specific part of your writing? List
2 questions you have based upon the comments I gave you on the essay.
How can improve my conclusions?
Can we have a workshop on that?

Part 2: Reflection on Outline Workshop

1. Based upon your work in class today, on a scale of 1-5, how confident do you
feel about your outline? Rate yourself and explain your rating: 1= not
confident and 5 = very confident.
I’m a 3 ½ on my outline.
2. What do you think is your strongest claim? Write it below and explain why it is
your strongest claim.
My strongest claim has to be claim 2.
The revolving door of deportations and continuous money and guns give t to mexico by
the U.S. government, continues to affect the children which, furthermore in encourages
their decision to migrate to the US.

3. What do you think is your weakest claim? Write it below and explain why it is
your weakest claim and how you plan on revising this claim.
My weakest claim has to be claim 1
“The government uses the sped up time on children to attain a legal attorney not because
they want to speed up the children's cases so, that they attain asylum quicker, but to give
them no time to attain a lawyer in time and their cases be throw out; these children get
deported at a quicker rate”.
It is weak because it isn’t worded right. The focus idea is there but it needs improvement.

4. Where in your essay outline do you think you can introduce your concession?
After which claim? Explain the concession you think you might be able to use
in your argument and where you think it might fit.
I think it would fit in the introduction. I think that adding the confession in the introduction
would my reader a better understanding all of sides in this argument.
5. What are your next steps for drafting? Be specific and explain.
I have already started editing my outline. The next step is research and then adding the
research to the outline.

Part 3: Reflect on Research for Essay 4

1. What topics do you most want to research based upon Luiselli's text? List
your top 3 topics.
1.Nativism
2.Money given to mexico to prevent migrant children from crossing the border.
3. Neo-colonization
2. For each topic, explain WHY you are interested in this topic.
When your sister was giving her presentation it sparked an interest and Isa how it would
help my paper in researching these topics that contribute to why this children migrant.
3. For each of the above topics, write an open-ended question that you can try
to answer with the research you conduct this Thursday.
What is Nativism and how does it affect how immigration laws are made?
Why is money given to mexico and, how does it benefit both parties?
What is Neo-colonization and how does it connect to child migration?
4. What is your plan for research? Where will you go to research and find your
sources? Explain your plan for research.
My plan is to go the library and ask the librarian for some help with finding books or website that
can make my research process faster and efficient.