‘Towhom itmay concern: do NOT hire Bronk and Bongo! ‘Dear Sir or Madam: ‘known the team of Bronk and Bongo for quite some ime, ‘As someone who has recommendation rave been asked by them to provide this eter of vep-t you. Pease. PLEASE! Do NOT give them a job. IVE NEVER eaten thy wl wt never yur glen FOULS TEE wil manufacture sme that ever exited. BEEN MORE PROUD! HEY, THAT'S THE LONGEST THING EVER WRITTEN ABOUT US/ ‘AND EVERY WORD SO PERFECTLY SPELLED. a ‘And di mention hat they re dogs? DOGS! Who hires dogs? Many people, it ems. But none who dia’ ive 1 regret. ‘have seen with my own eyes (and ater, when itDecame necessary, with eyes purchased va the interes) vest fortunes disappear in their wake, sound buildings Iiterally imple, grown men cry. Theres no sight funnier than grown men crying. unless you ae those men. 1 st ay i thei defense that in all my years supervising employees Ihave fever mel any two more eager to satisfy than Bronk and Bongo. ‘But they will be as useful to you as hammer in a hailstorm! Nocone these woubled ies, ket wo turn away prospective employees who uly desire werk. What wil hey do? How will they survive? The best saecr can give you is this it sno basnes of yours. Tell them to aks hike. Throw hom ante te tuck tat cares away your sed uniforms. Let them starve. You wil ‘be doing yous favor. ‘As Thope Ihave dove you. ial a Pessonne drectr (retired) ‘Sincerely,He's acon man, essentially. The more ruthless of the two. He wants to win you over; he wants to make the sale. Fullling the promise, that’s a different skill. With a gruff, assertive manner that can be very charming, his mind is always bubbling up a line Of crap or an excuse to explain away his mistakes. He's your buddy, until he needs to blame something on you. Then his in- stinct for self-preservation takes over. He'll say anything. In fact, he'l talk your head off. You will literally rip your own head off to stop hearing him