Scene 1:

Carter Watson stands on the roadside with a newspaper under his arm. Says to himself “ The
Vendome…this might be a good place to study the class of people that frequent such gaudy
drinking places”. He steps forward to an area where a disheveled man is having his supper at a
table.

Patsy Horan shouts, “Out with you …I know your game…defacing me walls!”

Carter replies, “If I’ve given any offence, I didn’t mean to…”

Patsy rejoins, “Out with yeh..yeh talk too much with yer mouth”.

As Carter turns to leave, Patsy tackles him from behind. Six men come and surround them.
Carter keeps trying to dis entangle himself, but Patsy keeps attacking him.

Finallly, Carter frees himself and runs outside, where he encounters a policeman.

Carter, “Arrest that man, officer! He has committed a violent and unprovoked assault on me”.

Policeman, “Hello Patsy.. what’s the mix up?”

Patsy- “Charley, I was sitting in my kitchen eating a bowl of soup, when this guy comes in and
gets gay with me. I’ve never seen him before, he was drunk…Put up your hands he said, and
then he landed me twice and spilled my soup. I have witnesses to prove it.”

Watson, “Look at me officer, do I look drunk?”

Policeman- “Beat it or I’ll pull you in”.

Watson- “Mr. Officer, I protest…”

Policeman- “Come on, you’re pulled”.

Scene 2:

CW- Carter Watson

PA- Prosecuting Attorney.

(CW talks with PA in jail.)

PA- Why not let it drop! I’ll tell you what you do, Mr Watson: Shake hands with Mr. Horan
and make it up, and we'll drop the case right here. A word to the Judge, and the case against you
will be dismissed.
CW- "But I don't want it dismissed. Your office being what it is, you should be
prosecuting me instead of asking me to make up with this--this fellow
PA- Oh, I’ll prosecute you all right
CW- "Also you will have to prosecute this Patsy Horan, for I shall now have
him arrested for assault and battery."
PA- You'd better shake and make up

(CW and his friend talk )

F- You have no chance. Everybody knows you were beaten up by this man. His
reputation is most unsavory. But it won't help you in the least. Both cases will be dismissed.
This will be because you are you. Any ordinary man would be convicted."

CW- "But I do not understand," Without warning I was

attacked by this man; and badly beaten. I did not strike a blow. 1--"

F- That has nothing to do with it

CW- Then what is there that has anything to do with it ?

F- "I'll tell you. You are now up against the local police and political machine. Who are you?
You are not even a legal resident in this town. You live up in the country. You haven't a vote
of your own here. Much less do you swing any votes. This dive proprietor swings a string of
votes in his precincts--a mighty long string

CW- "Do you mean to tell me that this Judge Witberg will violate the sacredness of his office
and oath by letting this brute off
F- Watch him "Oh, he'll do it nicely enough. He will give an extra-legal,
extra-judicial decision, abounding in every word in the dictionary that stands for fairness and
right
CW- But there are the newspapers.
F- "They are not fighting the administration at present. They'll give it to you hard. You see what
they have already done to you."
CW- Then these snips of boys on the police force detail wont write the truth?
F- "They will write something so near like the truth that the public will believe it. They write
their stories under instruction, you know. They have their orders to twist and color, and there
won't be much left of you when they get done. Better drop the whole thing right now. You
are in bad
CW- but the trial are set.
F- "Give the word and they'll drop them now. A man can't fight a machine unless he has a
machine behind him."

Scene 3:

Patsy in the witness stand

Patsy Attorney- “ Patsy, tell us what happened between you and Mr. Watson?”
Patsy - “I was sittin in my kitchen eating a bowl of soup, when this guy comes in and gets gay
with me. I’ve never seen him before, he was drunk. Put up your hands, he said, and then he
landed me twice and spilled my soup. I have witnesses to prove it”.

Prosecuting attorney- “No questions, your honor”.

Patsy leaves the witness stand, his first witness takes the stand

Patsy attorney- “Did you see what happened between Patsy and Mr. Watson?”

Witness- “Yes, it was just as Patsy said. This Watson guy came in and beat up Pasty with no
provocation, he was just eating his soup.”

Prosecuting attorney, pointing to Watson- “Was this the guy?”

Witness- “Yes, this was him”.

Prosecuting attorney- “No further questions”.

Watson takes the witness stand.

Judge Witberg-“Why did you enter this place of unsavoury reputation?”

Watson-“It has been my custom, as a student of economics and sociology, to acquaint myself..”

Judge-“We want none of your ologies here. It’s a plain question, answer it plainly. Were you
dunk?”

Watson-“No your honor. And I never started any fight with Mr. Horan here. It was he who
assaulted me with no provocation..”

Judge-“This is a fairy story. Mr. Horan has witnesses to prove his story. Each of you has sworn
that the other made an unprovoked assault on him. An An axiom of the law is that the benefit of
the doubt should be given to the defendant and a very reasonable doubt exists in this case. My
verdict is that in the case of people Vs Carter Watson, the benefit of the doubt is given to Carter
Watson and he Is discharged from custody. Similarly, in the case of people Vs Patsy Horan, the
benefit of the doubt is given to Patsy Horan and he is discharged from custody. My
recommendation is that both defendants shake hands and make up.”

Scene 4:

Setting- an open meadow. Judge Witberg and Carter Watson stand in front of each other.

Watson-“ Didn’t you see the ‘no trespassing’ signs, judge”?

Witberg- “Oh, umm, I’m not sure, dear man. You know me?”.

Watson- I don’t think you remember judge, but I was the person you told to shake hands with my
assaulter, that vile of a man named Patsy Horan”.

Judge-“Oh…yes! I thought maybe you looked familiar..I hope you have no animosity..it was not
personal”.

Watson-“ No, no, judge, no animosity at all. Politics is a dirty business, is all . And I am going to
prove it to you.

Watson picks up a stone and hits himself. The wound bleeds. He hits himself a few more times,
“I must bruise a little, there is nothing like being realistic in these matters. A few more blows and
it will look most convincing.

Witberg- “You are insane”.

Watson- “Don’t use such vile language to me. You see my bruised and bleeding face? You did
that, with that right hand of yours. You hit me twice, biff, biff. It’s a brutal and unprovoked
assault. I am in danger of my life. I must protect myself”.

Witberg- “If you strike me, I’ll have you arrested”.

Watson- “That’s what I told Patsy, and you know what he did/”

Witberg- “No”

Watson- “That!”

Watson hits Witberg . Watson continues to hit Witberg till he falls down. The fight continues and
each time CW hits Judge he says “I will have you arrested!” It happens a couple of times then
CW says “Not if I can beat you to it.” Then CW hurriedly departs.

Judge is arrested outside of his hotel.

Scene 5:

Court room

Watson in the witness stand-“ Your honor, I was picking flowers in my field, when this man
rushed upon me. I am the dodo, he says, and I can do you to a frazzle, put up your hands. And
with that- biff, biff, he struck me. It was an unprovoked and brutal assault. He must’ve been
drunk. I was in danger of my life and was compelled to defend myself.”

Witberg in the witness stand-“Your honor, I have never heard such a pack of lies told by a bare
faced liar…”
Watson, interjecting-“Your honor, I protest. It is for your honor to decide truth or falsehood.The
witness is on the stand to testify to actual events and his personal opinion has no bearing on the
case.”.

Judge to Witberg-“Why did you strike Mr. Watson, and that too on his own premises?”

Witberg-“I did not see the no trespassing signs…and as I have testified, your honor, I did not
strike a blow.”

Judge-“Look at that man’s face-if you did not strike a bow, how come it is disfigured?”

Witberg-“He struck himself with a rock”.

Judge- “It sounds like a fairy story. There are no witnesses outside the two principals. Each
claims the other committed the assault, and I have no legal way of determining the truth.
Therefore, I am compelled to give the defendant the benefit of the doubt. Gentlemen, you are
both dismissed.”

Watson winks at Witberg- “Let’s shake hands and make up!”

Witberg angrily walks away.