Anger Part 1:
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Understanding Anger
by David Powlison
Every human being deals with anger. In a world of
disappointments, imperfections, miseries, and sins
(our own and others’), anger is a given. You get angry.
I get angry. Those you counsel get angry. No doubt
that’s why the Bible comes packed with stories, teach-
ings, and comments about anger: God intends us to
understand anger and to know how anger problems
can be resolved.
This article has three parts. “Understanding
Anger” will focus on how we think about anger. The
second and third parts, which will appear in future
issues, will look at implications and how we counsel
angry people.
What is anger? How do we make sense of it? Let’s
begin with five general statements about something
we often experience but seldom stop to understand.
1. The Bible is About Anger
The Bible is about anger. Who is the angriest per-
son in the Bible? God. When God looks at evil, “His
anger does not turn away,” as Isaiah repeated over
and over. In Romans, Paul mentions God’s anger and
its effects more than fifty times, beginning with, “The
wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all
ungodliness and unrighteousness of men” (Romans
1:18). John says that the wrath of God “abides” on
whoever will not believe in the Son of God for mercy:
anger was, is, and will remain on their heads.1
That God is angry tells us something very impor-
tant. Anger can be utterly right, good, appropriate,
beautiful, the only fair response to something evil,
and the loving response on behalf of evil’s victims. In
fact, “it would be impossible for a moral being to
stand in the presence of perceived wrong indifferent
and unmoved.”2 It is no surprise that Jesus Christ was
filled with anger when He encountered people who
perverted the worship of God and contributed to or
were calloused to the sufferings of others.3
1John
3:36; cf. 3:14-21.
2B.
B. Warfield, “The Emotional Life of Our Lord,” The Per-
son and Work of Christ (Philadelphia: Presbyterian &
Reformed, 1950, pp. 93-145), p. 107.
40
God’s anger is never capricious or ill-humored.
responds justly to what is wrong and offensive. But
He “takes no pleasure in the death of the wicked,
rather that he should turn from his ways and live”
(Ezekiel 18:23). Human beings were intended to love
the one who made and sustains them, whose “riches
of kindness, forbearance, and patience” all have expe-
rienced (Romans 2:4). But “their adulterous hearts
turned away…and their eyes played the harlot after
their idols” (Ezekiel 6:9). Is God’s anger unfair? When
challenged, God’s response is straightforward: “Are
My ways not right? Is it not your ways that are not
You can’t understand God’s love
if you don’t understand His anger.
right?…I shall judge you according to your ways and
according to your deeds.”4
The crimes that arouse God’s wrath are capital
crimes: betrayal, rebellion, deceit, blasphemous
beliefs. The human heart is treacherous; we desire to
believe anything but what is really true about God.
The feelings aroused in us when we hear someone
described by the word “traitor” give a hint of the rea-
soning within God’s wrath. Human beings were
intended to listen to God’s life-giving voice and to
treat one another with love. But we have hearts of
stone. We are headstrong: “You are each one walking
according to the stubbornness of his own evil heart,
without listening to Me”; “Everyone did what was
right in his own eyes.”5 God would be less than good
if He did not hate such evils.
God, of course, is also the most loving person in
the Bible, and the Son of God expresses the fullness of
His love. We often fail to see that God’s anger and love
are entirely consistent with each other as different
expressions of His goodness and glory. The two work
together: “Jesus burned with anger against the
wrongs He met with in His journey through human
life, as truly as He melted with pity at the sight of the
3See,
e.g., Mark 3:5 and 10:14; Matthew 18:6f and 23:2-36;
John 2:14-17.
4Ezekiel 18:29 and 24:14.
5Jeremiah 16:12; Judges 21:25.
The Journal of Biblical Counseling • Volume 14 • Number 1 • Fall 1995
world’s misery: and it was out of these two emotions
that His actual mercy proceeded.”6 You can’t under-
stand God’s love if you don’t understand His anger.
Because He loves, He’s angry at what harms.
But notice the way God’s children experience His
anger: His anger is expressed on their behalf as
supremely tender love! As we will see, the Bible is
consistent about this truth. Yet anger is by definition
against things, with an intent to destroy, so how can
God’s wrath become something God’s children love
and trust rather than something they fear or dislike?
In what way is God’s anger an expression of how He
is for us, rather than the expression of how He is
against us? The Good News is always presented in
terms of how love and anger come to be resolved. God
expresses His love for His people by each of the three ways
He expresses His anger at wrong. He promises to free
believers from three things.
First, in love, the anger your sin deserves fell on Jesus.
God’s anger at sin was expressed—but for your well-
being. Once and for all in the past, God set you free
from ever experiencing His wrath against your sins. In
steadfast love, He freely offered His innocent Son to
bear the wrath deserved by the guilty. God’s anger
punishes and destroys, giving our sin its due—but it
was taken by Jesus, the Beloved Lamb, the Savior of
sinners. Because He loves us, He offers Himself to
bear the fire of anger; the way of our deliverance is
His glory and our joy. God’s loving anger, expressed
in a way that brings us blessing, is the basis of life
from the dead: it assures us of true forgiveness. Justi-
fication by faith and adoption as the children of God
rest upon that form of love called substitutionary
atonement. What we deserve, another bore because
He chose to love us. In this supreme act of self-giving
love, we experience God’s anger acting FOR us. In
response, we confidently repent and believe.
Second, in love, God’s anger works to disarm the power
of your sin. His anger at sin is again expressed for your
well-being. In the present, He deals continually with
indwelling sinfulness itself.7 The Holy Spirit, who
pours out God’s love within you, is a burning fire of
anger against evil, not to destroy you but to make you
new. In steadfast love, He remakes us, not by tolerat-
ing our sin, but by hating our sin in a way that we
learn to love! The process is not always pleasant
because suffering, reproof, guilt, and owning up don’t
feel good. But deliverance, mercy, encouragement,
6Warfield,
p. 122.
7A work
that will be completed when we see Jesus return on
the day of wrath. See, for example, Philippians 1:6; 1 Thes-
salonians 5:23; 1 John 3:2.
The Journal of Biblical Counseling • Volume 14 • Number 1 • Fall 1995
and a clearing conscience do feel good. God remakes
us progressively into love, joy, peace, and wisdom—
His own image. God’s anger remedies and destroys
ongoing sin. Because He loves us, He’s angry at our
self-destructive sinfulness; our growing faith and obe-
dience is His glory and our joy. God’s loving anger on
our behalf nourishes and encourages faith: it assures
us that He will keep working both inside us and
around us to set us free of indwelling evil.8 In the new
birth and sanctification, God’s destructive power
works within us against what is wrong with us. He is
for us, making us new, teaching us to listen, remaking
us like Jesus. In the daily outworking of love, we expe-
rience God’s anger working FOR us. In response, we
energetically cooperate and obey.
Third, in love, God’s anger will deliver you from the pain
of others’ sins. His anger at sin will be expressed again
for your well-being. In the future He promises to end
all suffering from others’ sinfulness.9 God hates the
way people hurt other people. In steadfast love, He will
deliver us from our enemies; on the last day all causes
of pain will be destroyed forever. At the same time, the
Bible is clear that those who oppose God and hurt His
people exist for a purpose: they are God’s unwitting
agents in the sanctification task. They act for their own
sinful reasons, but also accomplish God’s purposes for
good as He tests and transforms us through suffering.
They are agents of God’s loving discipline towards His
people that we might learn patience, faith, love for ene-
mies, courage, and every good fruit that can only be
learned in tough times. Yet they are under wrath for the
malice with which they do what they do.10 God’s anger
8Hebrews
12:5-11.
9Revelation
21:4 culminates a theme that runs throughout
this entire book of comfort for God’s afflicted people: the
wrath of the Lamb (6:16f) brings about mercy and life for the
people of the Lamb (7:16f). And now in part we experience
temporal deliverances (e.g., the promises of Psalms 31 and
121, and many Bible stories). In fact, on the whole God
rarely allows human sin to play out its intrinsic violent
logic. When it does (genocide, torture, abortion, rape, child
abuse) both victims and those who love them either learn to
long for the day when such evils will be destroyed or they
become like their tormenters.
10This theme is rich. The devil plays this role throughout his
career. So do the Babylonians, Judas, and every other histor-
ical oppressor who has a moment in the sun. For example,
Babylon was a “golden cup [of wrath]” and a “shatterer” in
the hand of the Lord, an agent enacting just anger on the
stage of history (Jeremiah 46:10; 51:7; 51:20-23). Five themes
crisscross through the discussions of Babylon by Isaiah, Jere-
miah, and Habakkuk. (1) Because God’s people sinned,
Babylon brought disciplinary anger—always leaving the
remnant whose faith was pure and purified through trouble.
(2) Because of godless human pride—“all mankind is stu-
pid, devoid of knowledge” (Jeremiah 51:17)—Babylon
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will punish and destroy His enemies—because He
loves His children and is glorified in our deliverance
from suffering. So we groan in pain, because the
painful is still painful; but we groan in hope, too,
because we know what will come.11 Because He loves
us, He’s angry at people who seek to hurt us: our
blessedness is His glory and our joy. God’s loving
anger on our behalf nourishes and encourages our
The same word, “anger,” speaks
of both the finest and the foulest
feelings and acts.
faith. God’s beloved children hope and trust that at the
return of Christ, His anger will make things right.12 In
anticipation, we groan and eagerly wait.
God expresses His love for His people by each of the
three ways He expresses His anger at wrong. God’s loving
anger resolves the entire problem of evil in a way that
brings Him inexpressible glory and brings us inex-
pressible blessing: justly condemning evil, severing
the power of remnant evil, and bringing relief from
suffering. Numerous psalms connect the steadfast
love and mercies of the Lord to this loving wrath by
which He delivers His children both from their own
sins and from those who harm them.13 “If God is for
brought punitive anger on the nations in darkness. (3)
Because Babylon sinned in arrogance, she too would drink
the cup of wrath. (4) Because God loves His people, though
they now agonize amid sufferings, they will experience
merciful deliverance into a place of peace. (5) Because God
had plans of blessing for all mankind, He would “in the lat-
ter days” choose other believers out of the nations now sunk
in darkness.
11This theme of hope in affliction runs throughout the Bible.
One need only wave in the direction of Psalms, Lamenta-
tions, Romans 8, 2 Corinthians, Hebrews, Revelation….
12Romans 12:19.
13We might fairly speak of the “steadfast love/anger of the
Lord,” of His “lovingangerkindness.” The “unfortunate,
needy and afflicted” who face the angry malice of others
hope in the anger of God’s love to make things right (Psalms
9-10). God’s anger at others’ sins is an object of faith in
numerous psalms. For example, in Psalm 37, I needn’t be
angry and fretful when evil comes at me if I take refuge in
the Lord and trust that His anger will deal with evildoers.
But those who are honest never become either stoic or self-
righteous. Suffering prompts hurt and angry outcry; suffer-
ing prompts self-reflection that uncovers my own evil.
Many psalms (cf. Habbakkuk) show that odd yet honest
42
us, who can be against us?” (Romans 8:31).
It’s important to make proper distinctions. God’s
wrath has become the hope of His children though it
is the despair of His enemies. But those enemies who
are willing to believe the staggering message of how
wrath is converted into grace through Jesus Christ
will be changed into friends. The truth is that you
can’t understand God’s love if you don’t understand
His anger. This is simply the message of the book of
Psalms, that royal road into the heart of redeemed
humankind, with its otherwise inexplicable inter-
weaving of joy and sorrow, hope and anguish, confi-
dence and fear, contentment and anger. You can’t
understand God’s love if you don’t understand His
anger. This is simply the message of the book of
Romans, that royal road into the mind of God: “Oh,
the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowl-
edge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments
and unfathomable His ways…. To Him be the glory
forever. Amen” (Romans 11:33, 36).
Come at the opening question from a different
angle. Who is the angriest person in the Bible? Satan.
His anger, also, does not turn away. He has “great
wrath,” being a “murderer from the beginning” even
until now.14 Satan’s anger springs from malice and
the desire to hurt people. His anger, the paradigm of
all sinful anger, is the antithesis of God’s. Satan’s hos-
tility aims to make things wrong, in service to his own
cravings. This also tells us something very important.
Anger can be utterly wrong, bad, inappropriate, ugly,
a completely destructive response. Such anger sum-
marizes the very essence of evil: “I want my way and
not God’s, and because I can’t have my way, I rage.”
It is a curious and often confusing thing that the
same word, “anger,” speaks of both the finest and the
foulest feelings and acts. Maintain proper distinctions,
because those you counsel will usually be as confused
about anger as they are about love.15 Sinful anger
combination of (1) knowing that I deserve the wrath of God
while uncovering my need for mercy and change, and yet
(2) knowing I do not deserve the unfair hostility of men who
happen to be God’s instruments. In Psalm 38, God’s anger at
my sins, painfully felt, eventually produces repentance,
hope, and faith—and outcry against those who brought the
pain. In Psalm 39 wrestling with my anger at the evil around
me eventually leads to hope for deliverance from my own
evil—and the evil around me. In Psalm 40, God’s steadfast
love/anger again delivers me both from my own sins and
from those who hurt me.
14Revelation 12:12; John 8:44.
15Like “anger,” the word “love,” as used both in the Bible
and in everyday speech, does duty for absolutely contradic-
tory things. We must press behind a word to get to the
freight of meanings it bears. When definitions of terms get
The Journal of Biblical Counseling • Volume 14 • Number 1 • Fall 1995
usurps God and does harm; godly anger loves,
enthroning God and doing good to people.
The Bible is about anger. In the very first exchange
after the fall into sin, Adam blamed both Eve and God
for what he had done. Blameshifting can feel nearly
emotionless, but the themes of sinful anger readily
appear: accusation of others, the stance of presumed
superiority and innocence. And it’s only a chapter
later that anger first breaks out into emotion and vio-
lence. “Cain became very angry”; his countenance
became grim and unhappy; he killed his brother (Gen-
esis 4:5). The logical result of sinful anger is recorded
thereafter in the story of Noah: “The earth was filled
with violence” (Genesis 6:11).
Scripture portrays many things about anger. For
example, anger can be falsely aroused. In Genesis 39,
Potiphar’s anger burned at the thought that Joseph
had been dallying with his wife. And anger can mask
itself in innocence. Potiphar’s wife was angry, too:
cool, sneaky, manipulative, vengeful. She played the
victim in order to destroy an innocent man who had
rebuffed her cravings. The same person can express
both righteous and sinful anger. When Moses’ anger
burned at those worshiping the golden calf, he burned
in the image of God.16 Anger energized him to redress
the problem. But when Moses cursed the people and
struck the rock, he burned in the image of sin. Anger
energized him to dishonor the God of grace.17
God often speaks His thoughts on anger in propo-
sitional form. He devotes the sixth commandment,
“You shall not commit murder,” to the family of judg-
mental reactions that includes sinful anger. Jesus’s
commentary on this commandment (Matthew 5:21f)
expanded the scope of its implications to include atti-
tudes and words. The Lord first spoke the command
to “love your neighbor as yourself” in a context
(Leviticus 19:14-18) that contrasts love with matters
pertinent to sinful anger: intentionally hurting help-
less people, unjust judgment, character defamation,
physical harm, inner hatred, vengeance, holding a
grudge. Interestingly, that same passage positively
defines love in terms that relate to righteous anger:
clear, loving reproof arises from caring about the wel-
fare of others. Wisdom, the patiently acquired gift
jumbled, mischief results. Both “anger” and “love” have
been much abused by failing to consistently discern the line
between good and evil that runs through their middle. The
philosopher Thomas Hobbes once commented astutely,
“Words are wise men’s counters, they do but reckon with
them, but they are the money of fools” (Leviathan, Part 1,
Chapter 4).
16Compare Exodus 32:19 with 32:11.
17Numbers 20:7-13.
The Journal of Biblical Counseling • Volume 14 • Number 1 • Fall 1995
from God, frequently comments on anger: the wise
and foolish are distinguishable by how they get
angry.18 And Jesus’ messengers frequently carried
words about anger. Variations on the theme constitute
half of Paul’s list of representative deeds of the sinful
flesh: “enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger,
disputes, dissensions, factions.” Every aspect of the
Spirit’s fruit is the explicit opposite of sinful anger.19
Both by precept and example, the Bible continual-
ly enlightens us about anger, intending to change us.
Every aspect of the Spirit’s fruit is the
explicit opposite of sinful anger.
The motivations for sinful anger are exposed within
Scripture: specific longings and unbelief. Why did the
Israelites grumble repeatedly in the wilderness? The
Bible doesn’t leave us in doubt. They didn’t get what
they wanted and they didn’t believe that God was
good, powerful, and wise. Those grumbling passages
in Exodus and Numbers also register how specific
anger’s motives are, and how motives of the heart
attach to details of the situation. When the food was
boring, the people craved cucumbers, melons, leeks,
onions, and garlic. When Moses acted as God’s
spokesman, Miriam and Aaron craved to share the
microphone. When enemies threatened, the people
feared death, not believing God would help them.
When water was not forthcoming, the people craved
irrigated grain, figs, grapes, pomegranates, and
water.20 Anger can be grim and murderous like Cain;
anger can burn with emotion like Potiphar; anger can
plan with cool malice like his wife; anger can rumble
and grumble, running on in complaints, unhappiness,
and bickering, like the wilderness wanderers. But in
all cases the cause of sinful anger boils down to spe-
cific lies and lusts that rule the human heart. You and
those you counsel are no different.
Anger also brings devastating consequences. God
is justly angry at our sinful anger. For example,
Moses’ tantrum against the people (another typical
pattern, getting angry at angry people, grumbling
15Like “anger,” the word “love,” as used both in the Bible
and in everyday speech, does duty for absolutely contradic-
tory things. We must press behind a word to get to the
freight of meanings it bears When definitions of terms get
jumbled, mischief results. Both “anger” and “love” have
been much abused by failing to consistently discern the line
between good and evil that runs through their middle. The
43
about grumblers) cost him the promised land. Of
course other people tend to react in kind to an angry
person which multiplies the general unpleasantness:
“An angry man stirs up strife” (Proverbs 29:22).
Angry people are divisive; divisive people are angry.
You will often witness immediate consequences in the
lives of those you counsel: frightened children, an
embittered spouse, spoiled friendships, health prob-
lems, difficulties in the workplace, estrangements at
church. Troubles dog the steps of an angry person: “A
man of great anger shall bear the penalty, for if you
rescue him, you will only have to do it again”
(Proverbs 19:19).
Anger feeds on itself and grows. Saul was a habit-
ually self-willed man. His brooding temper seethed
just below the surface. David’s sweet harp and amaz-
ing acts of merciful restraint soothed Saul temporari-
ly, but then he would explode again. Scripture is full
of examples of anger, with its many forms, causes, and
varied effects. Jonah, Jezebel, Nabal, and the Pharisees
are only a few of the lives gripped by this powerful
and most typical evil. In every list of typical sins—and
there is no temptation that is not common to all—
anger is prominent.
Thanks be to God, the Bible is also about the
gospel that forgives and changes angry people.
Proverbs, Ephesians, and James are only a few of the
books that dissect anger in order to redeem and trans-
form it. God never holds up a mirror without holding
out a lamp. He speaks fully and frequently about His
mercy to angry people. He speaks fully and frequent-
ly about the alternatives to sinful anger: trust, forgive-
ness, patience, contentment, the pursuit of justice,
godly confrontation, all the varied strategies and atti-
tudes of peacemaking, self-control, self-knowledge.
Righteous anger is an excellent and constructive
thing. Moses, Samson, David, and Paul, like Jesus, on
occasion burned with this most rare righteousness.
God in His grace pours out kindness on people
who were “enslaved to various lusts and pleasures,
spending our life in malice and envy, hateful, hating
one another” (Titus 3:3). What does grace intend to
accomplish? Grace creates wise, self-controlled, lov-
ing people who are able to stand up and do some
good in this world of hostility (Titus 2:11-3:8). Every
element in the definition of love in 1 Corinthians 13 is
the explicit opposite of sinful anger. To understand
your anger is to understand something that lies at the
heart of darkness. To change, learning both mercy and
righteous anger, is to enter the heart of light. We are by
nature all warmakers; blessed are the peacemakers,
for they shall be called the children of God.
Anger provides a tremendous counseling opportu-
44
nity. The issues are so clear. When angry, the human
heart is laid out on the table with nowhere to hide.
Often counselees’ lives are confusing; issue compli-
cates issue; problem piles on problem. Where do you
begin? Many times anger is a good place to start. The
behaviors are often plain to all: the tone of voice, the
cutting edge in the words, the glitter in the eyes, the
mask of disgust. Its presence is easy to see: grumbling,
whining, hostility, judgmentalism, bitterness, rancor,
negativism, hatred, bickering, disgruntlement, manip-
Righteous anger is an excellent
and constructive thing.
ulation, coercion. The motives are usually not difficult
to uncover: a mosaic of very specific desires, fears,
false beliefs, demands. The effects are patently bad:
broken relationships, health problems, misery. The
Word of God applies so immediately and in so many
ways: bringing self-knowledge, conviction, mercy,
hope, constructive alternatives, tangible help. No
wonder the Bible spends so much time talking about
anger and the alternatives!
And no wonder it’s so important that we under-
stand the Bible’s messages about anger. Big things are
at stake. On the one hand, the discontent-anger-hate-
violence family features some of the most characteris-
tic human sins. We all experience sinful anger, and we
all need help. On the other hand, God expresses His
glory and mercy through righteous anger. What we
need, He gives freely in revealing Himself for our
well-being.
2. Anger is Something You Do
Anger is something that you DO with ALL that
you are as a person. Getting this straight will help you
see through the half-truths by which our culture lies to
us about anger.21 Every part of human nature is
involved. Anger involves your body. It has a marked
physiological component: the flushed face, the adren-
aline surge, the clenched muscles, the churning stom-
21C. S. Lewis once made the telling comment, “The worst lie
is the half-truth.” J. I. Packer commented similarly, “A half-
truth masquerading as the whole truth becomes a complete
untruth” (from the Introductory Essay to John Owen’s The
Death of Death in the Death of Christ, reprinted as Life by His
Death!, London: Grace Publications Trust, 1992). Anger, hos-
tility, and slander, by the way, are masters of such half-truth-
ful lies.
The Journal of Biblical Counseling • Volume 14 • Number 1 • Fall 1995
ach, the nervous tension. Interestingly, most of the
words Scripture uses for anger communicate through
vivid, bodily metaphors. The two chief Old Testament
words for anger describe “nostrils” and “burning.” If
you’ve ever seen a really angry person you’ve proba-
bly noticed how nostrils flare, breathing becomes loud
and irregular, blood floods the capillaries and heats
the skin. Similarly, the main Greek words for anger
communicate the sense of “steaming or smoking” and
“swollen,” reflecting the sensation of heat and the evi-
dent swelling of face and eyes. It is no accident that
many of our idioms for anger work off the physiolog-
ical effects: “hot under the collar,” “steamed,”
“breathing fire,” “volcanic,” “seeing red,” “hot-blood-
ed,” “slow burn.” That anger is unmistakably physio-
logical lends plausibility to those medicalistic theories
that view it as basically physiological, hence some-
thing to be soothed through medications. Of course
our hormones, blood flow, muscles, and grimaces reg-
ister anger. But that’s not all there is to it. Biblically, the
whole person does anger.
When someone says, “I’m angry,” we usually
think of emotions first. And anger is a “passion.” Peo-
ple feel angry. Their emotional equilibrium is “upset.”
Intensity levels vary tremendously, of course. The
emotional Richter scale can range from mild irritabili-
ty to blind rage. You don’t need to rant and rave to
have a problem with sinful anger. Grumpiness, the
cutting remark, sulky self-pity, and the critical attitude
all qualify. Curiously, some of the most frightening
forms of anger seem almost beyond emotion. They are
icy rather than hot. I will never forget a conversation I
had many years ago with a sixteen-year-old girl. She
seemed angry at her parents. When I asked her about
it she looked at me with the cold eyes that you see in
mug shots of professional killers. She responded in a
flat voice, “I don’t get angry, I get even.” A wide range
of emotional colors expresses discontent and hostility,
and you’ll encounter them all in counseling. But many
people want to think of anger only as an emotion, and
perhaps as a neutral, God-given emotion at that. Yet
why limit anger to physiology or feeling when it is
clearly more?
Anger also consists in thoughts, mental words and
pictures, attitudes, judgments. It involves reason,
imagination, memory, conscience, every inner faculty.
Even if no words or actions come forth, the angry per-
son thinks intensely. “You are stupid. This is not fair. I
can’t believe she did that to me.” The internal video
camera replays clips from what happened, or may
script and rehearse imaginary scenarios of violent ret-
ribution. The entire criminal justice system—except a
defense attorney for the accused!—plays out in the
The Journal of Biblical Counseling • Volume 14 • Number 1 • Fall 1995
courtroom of the mind: investigator, prosecuting
attorney, witnesses, judge, jury, jailer, and hangman.
This judicial attitude is written into the nature of
anger. It is an attitude of judgment, condemnation,
and displeasure at persons or things. Words and
actions get thought and planned, whether or not they
ever get said or done.
Anger occurs not only in the mind, it breaks out
into behavior. I knew a couple who culminated one
particularly violent argument with a gunfight, him
upstairs and her downstairs. I’ve never done that. But
I coolly communicated my irritation with my wife
Anger rarely stands alone.
when I buried my nose one inch further into a maga-
zine after she made a comment that I didn’t like.
Anger does things. It shows up in accusatory or sar-
castic words, curses, exaggerations, gestures, hitting,
disgusted sighs, walking out of the room, rising deci-
bel level, threats, glowering. You do anger, with all
that you are.
And the plot thickens. Anger, like other sins, rarely
stands alone. It is often woven deeply into other per-
sonal problems. Often anger and fear are close
cousins. I’ve witnessed a mother scream in rage at her
young child who lay on the ground crying after a
playground accident. She’s afraid; she yells instead of
comforts. Some theories of anger try to make anger
secondary to fear, but this is surely mistaken. When
things don’t go right, all sinners feel like the raccoon
cornered in the garage: fight or flight depending on
the odds, anger and fear coexisting.
Anger complicates many other problems. Sub-
stance abuse can connect with anger in a variety of
ways. A family friend once said of her husband, “He
drinks to maintain control of himself against his
rage.” When he didn’t drink, he’d get increasingly
hostile towards her, his boss, and the world. Decades-
old grudges would haunt him. When he drank he got
mellow and felt better. Alcohol served as medication
against rage. Here’s a different pattern. A woman
drank to express her anger at straightlaced parents.
Embarrassing everybody and ending up in the gutter
served as a form of revenge.
Sexual immorality can connect to anger. A single
man spoke of his use of pornography as a “temper
tantrum at God for not giving me a wife.” Many adul-
teries occur as a way to get even. Suicide can express
the same thing: “You’ve hurt me so badly, and I have
45
no other way to get back, but you’ll sure feel bad after
I kill myself and you’ll have to live with what you did
to me.” Anger at oneself is a common phenomenon: “I
can’t believe I did something so stupid. If only I was
more beautiful, rich, intelligent, and scintillating in
conversation, but I’m just an ugly, poor, stupid bore.”
Self-recrimination, self-accusations, even self-torture
(cigarette burns, banging one’s head against the wall,
and so forth) can manifest hopeless, self-hating rage at
a sense of failure.
So far, we’ve chiefly described sinful anger as a
personal problem. But anger is usually an interper-
sonal event. Anger has an object, a target.22 Obviously,
anger is a central feature of interpersonal conflicts
wherever they occur: marriages, families, churches,
workplaces, neighborhoods, nations. It is an interper-
Anger is natural, by creation. But since
the Fall, sinful anger is also a given.
sonal strategy, a social and political event. War has
both its offensive and defensive strategies. Like petty
barons squaring off, people shoot arrows of malicious
accusation and build castle walls of aggrieved self-
righteousness, fear, and hurt. Here, anger adopts the
military role as well as the judicial role. It is an ideal
weapon for getting what you want. Anger coerces,
intimidates, and manipulates. You will counsel fami-
lies that “walk on eggshells” or “duck into foxholes at
incoming fire” in relation to one explosive member.
It is no surprise that anger also plays out in the
most basic interpersonal relationship: with God.
Many people are angry at God. People treat God the
same way they treat others—that observation will
carry you a long way in counseling. The Israelites
grumbled indiscriminately, accusing both Moses and
the Lord. People frequently target God with mockery,
curses, bitterness, and willful misrepresentation.
When the Son of God walked the earth, people were
out to get Him. You will often counsel people who
view God through the lens of accusatory anger: as if
God were in fact the devil, a kill-joy whose nature is
malicious, legalistic, cruel, remote, and uncaring. This
is no surprise. If I believe that God exists to give me
22Of
course people can become angry at nonhuman objects,
too. Balaam beat his donkey when it crossed him. Com-
plaints about food and the weather seem endemic to human
nature.
46
what I want, I will burn when He doesn’t deliver. In
fact, when considered from the standpoint of what
motivates the human heart, all sinful anger has imme-
diate reference to God. If I curse the heat and humidi-
ty, I assail God in three ways. First, I forsake Him, the
fountain of life, acting as if He did not exist. Second, I
act as if I were God instead, elevating my will for com-
fort to supreme status in my universe. Third, I grum-
ble against Him, implicitly criticizing the real Author
of “bad” weather for displeasing me.
Anger is bodily, emotional, mental, behavioral. It
weaves in among many other problems. It is decided-
ly interpersonal, both with respect to people and God.
In short, you DO anger, with ALL that you are. But
where does it come from?
3. Anger is Natural
Anger is a given; it is natural to human beings in
two very different ways. It is natural because we were
created in God’s image; it is natural because we fell
into sin. God created us, in His image no less, with the
capacity for anger. He called it very good. In fact,
Adam and Eve should have gotten lethally angry
when the serpent lied to them about life and death,
God, and wisdom. They should have reacted with
strong emotions, clear arguments, and violent action.
They should have challenged those lies, picked up
stones, and killed the serpent. Anger is a good thing
built into human nature.
As human beings made and remade in the image
of a holy God, we are hardwired with the capacity for
anger at wrong, as an expression of love both for God
and for those harmed by wrong. And, as sinners who
have ourselves received mercy instead of wrath, we
have the otherwise inexplicable capability simultane-
ously to hate wrong and to give love to those who do
wrong: “on some have mercy with fear, hating even
the garment polluted by the flesh” (Jude 23). When in
counseling you encounter adultery, or violence
towards the weak, or cruel words, you will feel pain
and loathing at the deeds and their effect on others.
And yet you will simultaneously have mercy to give
generously to the perpetrators of such evils.
Other counseling implications abound. For exam-
ple, we need to remember that God’s creation is
diverse; all people are not alike. We should not be sur-
prised that some people are born more attuned to jus-
tice or more forceful emotionally than others. Among
my three children differences in temperament showed
up almost from the day of birth: different capacities
for emotional reaction, for reacting to injustice, for rea-
soning about events. God’s dealings with anger (and
other issues) don’t cancel human diversity; He works
The Journal of Biblical Counseling • Volume 14 • Number 1 • Fall 1995
within it.
So anger is natural, by creation. But since the Fall,
sinful anger is also a given. As human beings corrupt-
ed into the image of an unholy accuser, we are also
hardwired for resentment and hatred. And in a fallen
world, human anger is so disordered that James can
make a sweeping indictment: “Be slow to anger, for
the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness
of God” (James 1:20). Only a fool would not think
twice before getting angry, but we easily play the fool.
Even righteously aroused anger easily degenerates
Anger evaluates and
anger is itself evaluated.
into self-righteousness, gossip, self-pity, vengeance,
cynicism, and merciless accusation.
Our capacity for sinful anger shows up early:
nobody has to teach a child to throw a tantrum. The
first time one of my daughters threw herself on the
floor, kicked her feet, and screamed bloody murder,
my wife and I looked at each other in amazement. Our
daughter had never seen anyone act that way, at least
not to our knowledge. She was young, and hadn’t
been exposed to many other children. In fact she’d
never been out of our presence except for brief stints
with babysitters, none of whom we thought likely to
have demonstrated what we were now witnessing.
But there she was, mad as a wet hen because her will
had been crossed! It was an act of creative, unlearned
iniquity. We need to remember that total depravity
includes our anger no less and no more than anything
else distinctively human.
4. Anger is Learned
Anger is learned, also in two different ways. First,
anger is taught and modeled to us. We pick it up from
other people, for good or ill. We learn what to get
upset about, and how to show our displeasure.23
23When it comes to explaining anger, biblical Christians
don’t cast their vote with either “nature” or “nurture,” or
even with “nature and nurture.” The divide between good
and evil runs through everything, so we discern four factors.
In sizing up the effects of “nature,” you can’t understand
people without noting both creation-nature and sin-nature
as we saw in the previous section. Similarly, in sizing up the
effects of “nurture,” we must pay attention both to sin-nur-
ture and grace-nurture. Patterns of both sin and wisdom
may be nurtured (Proverbs 13:20). Neither nature nor nur-
ture are neutral.
The Journal of Biblical Counseling • Volume 14 • Number 1 • Fall 1995
Habits, styles, and tendencies to sinful anger are
easily acquired from others. Many children who had
never thought of letting fly an angry curse—they had
never even heard all the bad words—are surprised
when one slips out a week after first riding on the
school bus. Parental shock perhaps quickly nips habit
formation. But later, when they live in a college dorm
or land their first job on a construction crew, in a fac-
tory, or in the military, the four letter words creep in as
all-purpose modifiers: “Pass the %$#@! butter” isn’t
usually learned at home.
By modeling, angry and hostile curses become
routine ways to respond to the mildest frustration.
With good reason the Bible says, “Do not make friends
with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one
easily angered, or you may learn his ways and get
yourself ensnared” (Proverbs 22:24f). Counselors will
look for companions from whom angry counselees
have learned how to be angry and what to be angry at.
A parent who routinely damns the weather, the traffic,
or his spouse disciples his children to do likewise.
Godly, constructive anger is also learned, though
habits, styles, and tendencies to righteous anger are
not easily acquired from others. Nonetheless, “he who
walks with wise men will be wise” (Proverbs 13:20).
And if we walk with the wisest man who ever lived,
we will learn to “walk in the same manner as He
walked” (1 John 2:6).
Many of the details of a person’s style of anger
may be influenced by parents, peers, or ethnic group.
Cultural differences in expressing both sinful and
righteous emotions can be marked. Italian anger and
Norwegian anger typically differ drastically in modes
of expression.24 Sinful anger always comes “out of the
heart” (Mark 7:20-23), but the exact form anger takes
often is nurtured. Counselors should expect that both
righteous and sinful anger will look different, depend-
ing on individual and cultural differences, and should
not impose their own personality style on those they
counsel.
Anger is learned in a second way. It is practiced,
and can become “second nature,” a habitual manner
of life. Our patterns of anger become characteristic.
Some people hit the roof and then get over it; others
go into their shell; others go on the rampage for days.
Some people raise their voices, others get quiet; some
24Woody Allen fans will remember the famous split-screen
scene in the movie Annie Hall. The tight-lipped civility of
upper class, Westchester Anglo-Saxons contrasted with the
volatile emotional roller-coaster of working class, Brooklyn
Jews. The habits of the former should not form our image of
biblical self-control. The habits of the latter should not form
our image of biblical emotional expression.
47
people give plenty of signals that they are angry, oth-
ers make guerrilla strikes out of nowhere; some use
anger to intimidate and control people, others use
anger to sulk and avoid people. Counselors must
become familiar with the characteristic flesh of their
sheep.25
5. Anger is a Moral Matter
Anger is an intrinsically moral matter. I mean this
statement in two ways. Anger evaluates and anger is
itself evaluated. This has been implicit in the previous
discussion, but is worth holding up for inspection.
First, anger evaluates; that is, it weighs something or
someone, finds it lacking, wrong, or displeasing, and
then moves into action. Anger arouses us to attack or
discredit what we find displeasing. Anger has on
occasion been well-described as the “moral emotion.”
It is a self-contained judicial system, reacting to per-
ceived wrong with energy. Throughout this article I
have typically broadened our definition of “anger” to
include judgmentalism, grousing, blameshifting,
hatred, violence, and the like. All of these things are
judgments against perceived evil. What we typically
think of as “anger”—a raised voice, accusatory words,
emotional heat, hostile attitude—is probably best
defined as “the emotionally aroused form of judg-
ment against perceived evil.”
In this article we are concerned with the essential
nature of anger, not with discriminating degrees and
nuances. And that essential nature is to pass a moral
judgment against something that we think both
wrong and important. I care enough about something
to be moved: the “motion” in emotion, the “motive” in
“motivation.” I am moved both to feel strongly and to
do something. Anger by its very nature takes a moral
position; it judges.
Second, anger is evaluated. God judges our judg-
ing; He morally evaluates every single instance of
anger. Did I perceive good and evil accurately? Did I
react to perceived evil in a godly way? If I become
peevish when the phone rings and breaks my concen-
tration, muttering a string of expletives, my anger
proclaims, “This phone call is bad and deserves to be
damned.” God evaluates both my criterion for judg-
ment and my way of reacting, and finds both wrong.
If I curse out an adulterer and gossip about him, my
anger proclaims, “Adultery is wrong, and should be
25“Characteristic
flesh” is Richard Lovelace’s provocative
term for the relatively stable patterns of sin that character-
ize each of us and differ from person to person. Dynamics of
Spiritual Life (Downers Grove, Illinois: InterVarsity Press,
1979), p. 110.
48
met with cursing and gossip.” God evaluates my cri-
terion for judgment and finds it right; He evaluates
my way of reacting and finds it wrong. If I become
angry when my child mocks his mother, and respond
to him with vigorous, loving reproof, my anger pro-
claims, “Disrespect is wrong, and should be met ener-
getically with respect, challenge, and mercy.” God
evaluates my anger, both my criterion for judgment
and my way of reacting, and finds them right. Such
anger expresses love for both my wife and child. The
emotional force of such loving anger does many good
things. It motivates me to intervene; it protects my
wife; it drives home to my child the significance of the
wrong; it models the right way to respond to anoth-
er’s sin.
Christianity is not about stoic apathy, being
“above” emotional reaction.26 Many people, in the
name of “being self-controlled,” actually prove them-
selves to be uncaring or obtuse. They sin by omission;
they are aloof, failing to help, where godliness would
get upset and look for ways to make an impact. But
neither is Christianity about unleashing emotions.
“He who is slow to anger has great understanding,
but he who is quick-tempered exalts folly” (Proverbs
14:29). Anger is not neutral. A line between wisdom
and foolishness runs through the center of every
instance of “anger”; it is either godly or devilish.
Here biblical thinking goes directly against our
culture. Our culture typically says, “Anger is neither
good nor bad, it just is.” The theory that emotions are
neutral has become a refrain of the therapeutic cul-
ture. But it’s not true that anger “just is.” Many peo-
ple, in the name of “just being honest” or “getting it
off my chest,” prove themselves to be recklessly self-
centered. They sin by commission; they are impulsive,
causing harm, where godliness would consider the
impact of words. Learning to discern the difference
between righteous and sinful anger is extremely
important, and not always easy.
We must fine-tune our moral judgment—“have
26Many popular philosophies of life are essentially stoic.
Cognitive-behavioral therapies, for example, view “nega-
tive” emotion (anger, discouragement) as a product of faulty
beliefs about events. They seek to teach a set of “rational”
beliefs that produce equilibrium no matter what occurs.
While there is no doubt that false beliefs produce sinful
anger, true beliefs ought to produce anger, dismay, and
anguish on occasion. See the Psalms. Similarly, Hindu
beliefs and practices—calling the sensory world illusion and
teaching techniques of calming meditation—are essentially
stoic. Of course faulty beliefs frequently create needless and
sinful reactions to illusory provocations, but true faith does
not produce bliss. Jesus did not live a calm life; He cared too
much.
The Journal of Biblical Counseling • Volume 14 • Number 1 • Fall 1995
our senses trained to discern good and evil” (Hebrews
5:14)—to tell the difference between righteous and
sinful anger. God and the devil are both angry all the
time; on whose side is your anger? Scripture gives
many criteria by which God trains us to discern. We
will consider seven.
Test #1: Do you get angry about the right things?
Anger addresses perceived wrong. Did you per-
ceive rightly? This is the first great divide. A person
may become angry at things he has no business being
angry about. People generate their own set of expec-
tations, their own “laws,” their own criteria of good
and bad, and react angrily when these “laws” are bro-
ken. Jonah is the classic case; twice he burned with
anger, and twice God challenged him, “Do you have
good reason to be angry?” (Jonah 4). He had perceived
God’s compassion on people and the withering of a
shade plant as serious wrongs. Much sinful anger aris-
es from similar misperceptions. For example, I may
expect to eat roast beef for dinner. When I sit down to
dinner, macaroni and cheese is served. If I grouse irri-
tably, is my anger neutral? No, it’s sinful, because I
have perceived as bad something that is good and
meant to be received with thanks. Much anger arises
from perceptions distorted by the beliefs, cravings,
and expectations that substitute for God’s rule in our
hearts.
A friend once came up to me after church and said,
“I want to ask your forgiveness for something. I’ve
been angry at you for eight months, and have just
held it in trying to forgive you. But God has convicted
me, and I want to get things solved between us.” I was
grateful that she wanted to get things straight and that
she’d had the courage and humility to raise a prob-
lem. But as she tried to describe an incident in the hall-
way at church where I had ignored and snubbed her,
she lost me. What was she talking about? I couldn’t
remember ever doing anything against her. Finally we
pieced it together. During the worship service one
morning I had started to feel nauseous. While heading
for the men’s room I had passed her in the hall with
the barest acknowledgment, no hello or conversation,
and an unhappy look on my face. She had interpreted
all this as directed at her. Eight months of anger result-
ed from perceiving evil where evil was not present.
Her desire for acceptance had ruled. Or perhaps it
would be better to say, her craving for acceptance had
conflicted with the desires of the Spirit in her. To be
seemingly ignored and frowned at by a presumed
friend is no fun. Where God rules, hurt and anger will
move us to resolve things in a godly way, checking out
our perceptions. This in fact she finally did, to the
praise of His grace, and we were heartily reconciled.
The Journal of Biblical Counseling • Volume 14 • Number 1 • Fall 1995
But where false beliefs and cravings rule, our percep-
tions stay twisted; we get stuck in hurt and anger. To
a degree this had happened, delaying reconciliation
by many months. Anger always reflect a person’s
moral standards, his definitions of good and bad,
right and wrong. Check them out!27
You may very well be angry at something you
should hate. You may accurately perceive a wrong. The
wrong may be against you: harshness from your
spouse or parent, disrespect from your child, lying by
an employee, fraud by a salesman, rape by a relative.
You may observe evil done publicly or to another
individual: child molestation, verbal cruelty, homo-
sexualist and abortionist propaganda, lies and manip-
ulation by a televangelist, wartime atrocities. Anger is
the appropriate Christian response. You would be a
stone, a sentimentalist, or a stoic if you didn’t feel
some degree of anger. But at this point we face anoth-
er divide.
Test #2: Do you express anger in the right way?
It’s possible to see the wrong in another’s life accu-
rately, and yet to express anger in a sinful way. Jesus’
27A
similar dynamic frequently operates in the anger at self
that our culture calls “low self-esteem.” For example, a
mother of preschoolers may be depressed, judging herself a
failure for not having a house that looks like it dropped from
the pages of House Beautiful. Christians often mishandle this
in one of two ways. First, many call her self-directed anger
and disappointment “false guilt,” and say she hasn’t done
anything wrong. They then add a quasi-gospel, such as
“Jesus accepts you just as you are, so relax and accept your-
self.” This often-repeated formula may sound plausible, but
is untrue. Second, others take her guilt at face value, and
give her the real gospel, “Jesus forgives the guilt of your sin
and helps you change.” But that misfires, too, because the
problem has not been adequately defined. The mercy and
aid Jesus gives is not intended to forgive normal clutter and
enable supernormal tidiness.
It is more accurate to say that her self-punishing anger
expresses “distorted guilt.” Her guilty feelings are the prod-
uct of a false law. She is truly guilty of serving that false
standard and of standing (or, in this case, falling) by
“works” under that false law. Her standards of judgment
are distorted, and her modus operandi is Christless. The truth
of God—both law and mercy—can renew her mind. Just as
the notion of false guilt is inadequate, so it is inadequate
simply to give her a quasi-gospel that says Jesus accepts her.
Jesus doesn’t just accept her as she is, because He stands
against her real sins. But because her guilt is distorted by
false criteria, it is also inadequate simply to say that Jesus
forgives her without doing spade work that defines her real
need accurately. Jesus doesn’t forgive her for not having a
picture-perfect house. That is not a sin. He will forgive her
for worshiping her own (and her culture’s) false standard,
and He will help her live grateful for grace, rather than fruit-
lessly trying to prove herself. When she understands her
real sin, then real grace makes wonderful sense.
49
parable about “the log and the speck” turns on this
issue.28 Righteously aroused anger (passing Test #1) is
often the hardest to get a grip on at this point. The
thing that happened “out there” seems so wrong that
I go blind to the wrong that is “in here.” The sins of
self-righteousness are notably self-deceiving.
The clearest gauge of whether anger is right or
wrong in its expression is whether it acts to condemn
or to offer help. We are called to put our faith in the
fact that “Vengeance is mine, says the Lord, I will
repay” (Romans 12:19). Our anger is not meant to be
punitive, to get even. It is meant to do good first, and
obviously, to the victims or potential victims of evil.
And it is meant to do good second, sometimes not so
obviously, to the perpetrators of evil. Anger motivates
us to intervene to stop wrong, to protect the weak, to
challenge tyrants (some of whom may sit before us in
counseling offices), to reprove, to warn the unruly, to
alert people to danger. But the dynamic of grace-giv-
ing and peacemaking must finally permeate our
anger. Otherwise we are guilty of merciless judgment,
of swiping at specks with boards lodged in our eyes.
Ephesians 4:29 is always true: “Let NO unwhole-
some word come out of your mouth, but ONLY such
a word as is good for edification, according to the
need of the moment, that it may give grace to those
who hear.” The perception of wrongdoing and the
energies of anger do not entitle setting aside an injunc-
tion specifically written to help people dealing with
displeasure at each other’s wrongdoings!29 Even
when (especially when!) dealing with gross sin or
heresy, 2 Timothy 2:24-25 always applies: “The Lord’s
bond-servant must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to
all, able to teach, patient when wronged, with gentle-
ness correcting those in opposition.”
Jesus addressed His fiercest diatribe against the
religious leaders in Jerusalem (Matthew 23). Anger
gave His words focus, a sharp point, a cumulative
impact. But He was not destroying people; He was
helping. Jesus spoke to rescue those whom the leaders
misled into legalistic self-righteousness and unbelief
in the Christ who stood among them. And Jesus spoke
to appeal to those leaders, warning them that they
faced wrath, “Woe to you.” Even in this extreme
instance of anger, Jesus did not inflict punishment. He
was not being quarrelsome, unkind, false, impatient,
fractious. When He bled on the cross, many leaders—
Nicodemus, Joseph of Arimathea, Paul the apostle,
and others—were included in His intercession,
28Matthew
7:1-5 and Luke 6:39-45.
29This
is the emphasis both in the immediate context (4:25-
5:2) and the larger context (from the beginning of chapter 4).
50
“Father, forgive them,” and came under the blood of
the Lamb who loved them.
There is a good reason why the limited punitive
function God gives to man—the “sword”—is held in
trust by the state for the general well-being. When the
“king,” the office of the magistrate, punishes fairly,
justice results. The greater the wrong, the more neces-
God and the devil are both angry all the
time; on whose side is your anger?
sary punishment becomes and the less individual
anger should play a part. When individual anger aims
for punishment, vigilante justice results, injustice fol-
lows, and God is displeased. Let this question search
you. Assuming your anger is appropriately aroused,
are you expressing it constructively, to the glory of
God? Or is your anger full of the peevishness, self-
righteousness, and punitiveness of sinful anger?
I can think of one dramatic occasion when my
anger was both intense and—as far as I know
myself—simply righteous. This incident happened
when I was a brand new Christian working in a men-
tal hospital. One of the patients was a brooding hulk
of a man, 6’ 4”, 260 pounds, with a history of violence.
“John” waited until all the staff had gone off to lunch
except me (hardly the Incredible Hulk) and a nurse
who went about 4’10” and 95 pounds. He chose that
time to go on a rampage. I heard the noise of furniture
being broken up in the day room. As I came out of the
nurse’s station, I beheld John trotting down the hall on
a crash course with me, holding a huge television set
over his head.
I became angry. Intensely angry. Maybe it was
crazy to be angry and not afraid, but anger was what
I was aware of. I don’t know where the booming voice
came from, but suddenly I heard myself saying,
“JOHN, PUT THAT DOWN AND GO TO YOUR
ROOM!” My words were intense and forceful. I was
dealing with wrong, and my response had energy in
it, it had command, it had authority. The righteous
anger produced amazing effects. John stopped in his
tracks, put down the TV set, and meekly trotted down
the hall to his room.
The next moment, still breathing heavily, I thought
to myself, “Where did that come from? Thank you,
God.” Once I calmed my heartbeat, I followed John
down the hall to talk to him. We had a good talk. I did-
n’t nag him or moralize at him. He, in fact, proved
The Journal of Biblical Counseling • Volume 14 • Number 1 • Fall 1995
remorseful. As I’ve thought about that incident subse-
quently, the nature of righteous anger has come clear-
er. I didn’t hate John. In fact it would be fairest to say
I loved him, though I obviously “felt” no warm affec-
tion for him at the moment. I did him true good, even
though I burned against his wrong. I wasn’t out to get
him. I didn’t hold a grudge against him. My words
weren’t vindictive. Aggressive as they were, they
aimed to solve the problem, to make peace. I didn’t
demean John. I wasn’t holier-than-thou. No residue of
bitterness remained. In fact, our relationship was
strengthened. The anger was not inappropriate. It was
appropriately aroused, based on accurate perception.
It was appropriately expressed, intended to bring
about the well-being of humans and the glory of God.
God doesn’t often deal us heroic moments. But in
the unheroic moments the same issues face us in a
lower key. The stubborn teen? The sullen husband?
The coworker running off at the mouth? The traffic
jam? The committee veering off in a fruitless direc-
tion? The interruptions that never happen at the right
time? “Something wrong is happening. How will I
love? Will I return evil for evil or will my words be
constructive? Whether forceful or mild, will my
response give grace to those who hear?”
Test #3: How long does your anger last?
How else can you tell if anger is godly? One gauge
is its duration. When anger lasts a day, a week, a
decade, a lifetime, something has gone wrong. When
anger settles into bitterness and hostility, the devil
wins the game. We become like our oppressors,
returning evil for evil. Ephesians states the principle
memorably: “Don’t let the sun go down on your
anger” (4:26). To do so is to sin, as the first half of the
verse bluntly informs us.
Anger can be clean and right. But God means
grace to triumph in those whom He is remaking in His
image. It doesn’t mean we won’t hate evil. It does
mean we take seriously the daily prayer that states
our need: “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive
those who trespass against us.” Do you get over your
anger? Or does it fester? Do your attitudes towards
people become poisoned with malice, disdain, con-
demnation? Where you keep short accounts on your
own sins—including the manifold sins of anger—
mercy will continually flow into your own life, mak-
ing you merciful to others.
Test #4: How controlled is your anger?
Godly anger is emotion controlled by a purpose
imposed on us by the Lord God. It is consistent with
those fruits of the Spirit termed self-control, gentle-
ness, and patience. Ungodly anger is emotion con-
trolled by the impulses of our own hearts, and runs
The Journal of Biblical Counseling • Volume 14 • Number 1 • Fall 1995
out of control, harsh, easily provoked. Jay Adams put
it well: “Anger is the emotion that has been given by
God to attack problems…. The energies of anger
[must be] productively released under control toward
a problem. [Anger] must be directed toward destroy-
ing the problem, not toward destroying the person….
Anger, like a good horse, must be bridled.”30 Is your
anger controlled by a godly agenda, by confidence in
God’s sovereignty, by submission to His purposes? Or
is it out of God’s control, unpredictable, vigilante,
either abusive or brooding? Is your anger grace-giv-
ing or judgmental?
God’s purposes through us are to give grace. Is
your anger laced with mercy? You will be provoked.
You can’t avoid it: “Stumbling blocks are sure to
come” (Luke 17:1). When your child mocks or defies
you as a parent, you don’t simply observe in a
detached way, “Oh, that’s interesting. Now, I believe
I’m hearing and seeing something that perhaps fits
the category of ‘sin’. Why, yes indeed, as I think about
it, that pattern of words seems inconsistent with obe-
dient respect. Hmm, I wonder how I ought to handle
it?” Oh no! You are made to react emotionally. A child
is not supposed to mock his parents! The offense right-
ly pushes a button and arouses something in you.31
Now, that anger easily becomes sinful, but it needn’t.
It can be bridled: “Let’s deal with this.” The anger pro-
vides energy to name clearly what was wrong, to dis-
cipline the child, to talk with him, comfort him, and
give love to him. Anger is sinful and destructive if
punitive, righteous and loving if disciplinary.
Does such self-control mean that your anger will
not be as intense? This is a difficult question because
the Bible does not make intensity a criterion. Cool dis-
dain or mild disgust can express profoundly evil
forms of “judgments against perceived evil.” Geno-
cide—literal or attitudinal—can occur without much
emotion, rather like exterminating vermin or taking
out the garbage. Such intense forms of hatred may be
devoid of emotional heat, but are deeply evil. The
aloofness of such “superior beings” simply dismisses
those displeasing persons or points of view that fail
30Jay Adams, What Do You Do When Anger Gets the Upper
Hand?, Phillipsburg, New Jersey: Presbyterian & Reformed,
1975.
31Some parents, of course, have “buttons” that get pushed
by things that aren’t sin. They get angry over things that
aren’t wrong, or over minor infractions of family rules and
customs. Their buttons are sinful. See Test #1. Some parents
“go ballistic” when either their sinful buttons or the legiti-
mate buttons are pushed. See Test #2. Some buttons were
left 98% pushed in from something that happened last
week, so parental anger is on a hair-trigger. See Test #3.
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their test of significant existence. In contrast, Jesus
was “consumed” with anger when He drove the mon-
eychangers out of His temple (John 2:17). Both then,
and when condemning the Pharisees, Jesus seems to
register up at about 10 on the Richter scale of emo-
tional force. Yet His anger was always mastered by
His devotion to God’s glory and the well-being of the
people of God, just as it will be on the day when the
“wrath of the Lamb” is revealed (Revelation 6:16f).
The sinfulness or godliness of
anger arises from the motive.
Perhaps it is fair to say that much of the intensity of
anger will be greatly diminished when it is controlled
by the Spirit, because so much anger is reckless,
vengeful, and misguided. Merciful, patient, wise peo-
ple simply don’t explode, while fools give full vent to
their wrath (Proverbs 29:11). The wise maintain a
humble self-suspicion regarding the validity of their
anger: does it pass God’s tests? Similarly, many of the
occasions of anger will disappear, because we won’t
be aroused by the many things that trigger irritable
anger. But all that said, there will always be some
occasions for anger, and some of those occasions may
call for strong feelings.
Test #5: What motivates your anger?
The sinfulness or godliness of anger arises from
the motive. People motivated by desire for God’s
glory, for personal conformity to Jesus’ model and
will, and for the well-being of others will be angry in
one way. People motivated by the “desires of body
and mind” (Ephesians 2:3), by pride and false beliefs,
will be angry in a different way. The simplest question
to ask about what underlies anger is, “What do I real-
ly want?” If you are honest, with God’s help, you can
recognize if you really crave to get even, or to hurt
someone, or not to be inconvenienced, or to prove
someone wrong, or to score points, or to be recog-
nized and appreciated, or to humiliate, or to win, or to
get your way. You are ruled by what the Bible terms
“self.” And, with God’s help, you can also recognize if
you really want the Lord of life to be honored in word,
deed, attitude, and intention. The counsel of brothers
and sisters can help us sort things through when we
are blind to something and can’t figure it out. Counsel
can help us when we deceive ourselves about our
motives, dressing up something unsavory as though it
were God’s will.
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One of the delightful things about counseling
angry people—and sorting out your own anger—is
that the link between root and fruit is so accessible.
For instance, how would you respond if, after you
asked a reasonable question, I derided your question
as stupid, slapped you across the face, and called you
a dirty name? You would feel pain, shock, dismay,
humiliation, anger, perhaps fear. Where would it go?
Glory be to God if the sense of being wronged moti-
vated you to confront me frankly, with a gentle spirit,
intent on checking my folly and bringing me to my
senses, confident that first I needed the grace of God
and then your specific forgiveness. There is every like-
lihood that you were motivated by Christ Jesus above
all else. If instead you grew bitter and brooded on
schemes for revenge, there is every likelihood that
you hunger and thirst for justice and respect more
than for righteousness. What if you “struggled with”
temptation to the latter response? Glory be to God if
you struggled your way from the second response
towards the first. God is honored and gives grace in the
struggle towards righteousness just as in the accom-
plishment of righteousness.
#6: Is your anger “primed and ready” to respond to
another person’s habitual sins?
Our brothers and sisters (let alone our enemies!)
often repeat their sins over and over. Jesus spoke of
“seventy times seven” and “seven times a day.”32 Is
your anger reaction equally repetitive? Repeated
arguments—in which the verbal volleys follow the
same scripted pattern time after time—reveal that
something is wrong with your anger.
When issues get dealt with daily, my anger isn’t
waiting to happen. The pump is not primed to react.
A wrong done today does not lead me to drag out
your criminal record of former transgressions. I won’t
say, “How many times have I told you….If I’ve told
you once I’ve told you a thousand times….You
always….You never….Here we go again….I can’t
believe that you did it again.” Godly anger is part of
grace and peacemaking. Grace breaks the cycle of
provocation-and-reaction so characteristic of life in a
sinful world. Sins, including sinful anger, are usually
repetitive. But godly anger starts fresh, because it
keeps no record of wrongs. It keeps looking for how
God is at work in the other person and in the situa-
tion, just as He is at work in me.
#7: What is the effect of your anger?
A final way to distinguish righteous anger from
sinful anger is by the effects. Sinful anger creates more
problems. It complicates matters. It hurts people, puts
32Matthew
18:22 and Luke 17:4.
The Journal of Biblical Counseling • Volume 14 • Number 1 • Fall 1995
them on the defensive. The way you come across
tempts them to duck or retaliate. Your words are “rot-
ten words”(Ephesians 4:29). That adjective was used
for rotten fruit or rotten fish. If somebody were to eat
your words—their condemning and belittling content,
their tone of voice—they would gag. Rotten words are
hard to stomach. Sinful anger creates vicious circles.
Evil triggers evil triggers evil.
People may still duck or retaliate when faced with
the just, accurate, and merciful words of godly anger.
But you aren’t the occasion of stumbling; they are
tempted simply by the sinfulness of their own hearts.
Gracious words are sweet to the taste. Even when they
contain tough truths, they breathe helpful intent.
Godly anger is part of solving problems. Generally,
righteous anger creates gracious circles. Evil triggers
good triggers… what? You never know. Sometimes
the insanity of sin is such that people actually do
return evil for your good. But in the long run good
overcomes evil. People often respond amazingly well
to the truth spoken in love. Even when a person
rebuffs you at first, the way you did things lodges in
his mind. He can’t deny the simple good sense of
what you said. He can’t deny the humility and lack of
condemnation in your manner. You frustrate his
attempt to defend himself by hurling accusations back
at you. You didn’t treat him the way he treated you.
That is the most powerful force on the planet.
Look at Jesus. Evil came at Him. Yes, His reproofs
could be blunt and intense on occasion. He needed to
be that way to show wrong for what it is, to protect
God’s honor, and to serve the well-being of those poor
in spirit who set their hopes on the Messiah. Yes,
many people returned evil for His good. But He
unmistakably loved His enemies. While we were ene-
mies, Christ died for us. Christ, even in His anger, did
not come to condemn the world but to save it. He
came to turn offenders into friends. Evil triggers good
triggers good.
Godly anger does not need to “win.” It does not
have to succeed in bringing malefactors to justice. Its
purposes are more modest on the surface, but more
extravagant under the surface: the glory of God and
the eternal well-being of God’s people. Godly anger
The Journal of Biblical Counseling • Volume 14 • Number 1 • Fall 1995
has good effects for all concerned. So when you are
confronted with unrepented evil, when your best
efforts seem to have had no good or lasting effect, you
don’t have to become angrier. You can instead become
more objective and matter-of-fact. On the inside,
mercy works to soften your heart. Jesus would have
you pray for their well-being, which includes their
repentance unto life (Luke 6:28). On the outside, you
are called to persistent, straightforward acts of unmer-
ited kindness: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him, and
if he is thirsty, give him a drink” (Romans 12:20). Also,
on the outside, you may be called to join with others
in those corporate activities that impose objective con-
sequences on wrong behavior: church discipline,
withholding financial aid, severance from a job, an
eviction notice, calling the police, criminal proceed-
ings, enacting better laws, voting in new leaders, and
the like. Such good activities are also “judgments
against perceived evil,” but they operate in a more
dispassionate mode. They are objective, sober necessi-
ties. They set limits on our more personal labors to
help people. As such, they are a great comfort and
good. It is often a great relief for a person facing per-
sistent evil to know that others are also taking respon-
sibility for making it right. It reduces the temptation
towards vigilante action.
Anger is a moral matter. By its very nature it eval-
uates and seeks to destroy perceived wrong. By God’s
very nature, our anger is always being evaluated.
These general statements about anger anchor our
thinking. The Bible treats anger in rich detail through
both examples and propositions. Anger is bodily,
emotional, mental, and behavioral. It is decidedly
interpersonal, always having to do with God and
often having to do with other people. It is both natur-
al and learned, for good and ill. It is a moral matter.
God gives us a worldview from which to think about
anger, and to wrestle with the diverse anger phenom-
ena we encounter. Counseling applications have been
scattered through the previous pages, and readers will
likely draw many other applications. In the next issue
we will consider some of the most important applica-
tions in greater detail.
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