A process of interaction

So, how do we define negotiation? Well, here’s our best attempt:

Negotiation is a process of interaction where two or more parties consider that they need to be
jointly involved in an outcome, but initially have different objectives. They seek by argument
and persuasion to resolve their differences to achieve a mutually acceptable solution.

If that seems a little complex, don't worry. The main thing to remember is that negotiation isn’t about
trying to get one over on your opposite number, but the quest to find a middle ground which both
parties can be satisfied with. We’re looking for the win/win situation that we learned about earlier.

Body language: playing high and low

In negotiation situations, we're traditionally told that we should project ourselves as confident and
assertive, with all the body language that this entails – standing tall with our shoulders back, maintaining
eye contact, using purposeful and deliberate gestures and so on.

However, room exists for a little variation. Depending on the situation, we can choose to play high or
play low.

‘Playing high’ is the approach that we should take when we want to seem authoritative, or when
status is up for grabs, and should be the preferred method when we’re negotiating from a
position of power. Here are some traits that typify playing high:

 Maintaining a still head

 Speaking in complete sentences
 Holding eye contact (even for a bit ‘too long’)
 Leaning back
 Making expansive gestures
 Not showing a visible reaction to others’ comments

Below is a list of characteristics that best reflect 'playing low'. This method is all about appearing
approachable, getting people to open up to you and making them feel important.

 Lots of nodding in agreement

 Speaking haltingly and in incomplete sentences
 Avoiding eye contact for the most part, except to ‘check in’
 Taking up as little space as possible
 Being at pains to explain oneself

Play high and low Exercise –Game

What do we want?

Once we decide upon how we’re going to approach the negotiation, in terms of our body language, the
next stage is to set out our objectives. Before we enter into discussion, we need to be very clear about:
  Alternatives

Do we have a plan b, if the negotiations reach an impasse? This might be a different

product or service that could better meet the client’s needs, or another interested party that
we can offer the deal to.

 Reservation

It’s crucial to set the bottom line (the least that we would be willing to accept, or the most
that we’ll be happy to pay) beforehand, and then stick to it. We mustn’t get distracted by
the ebb and flow of the negotiation process and over-extend ourselves.

 Aspiration

Lastly, we should identify our main aspiration for the deal – the best possible outcome that
we could hope for. This should be our starting point for negotiation.

The five-step model of negotiation

Next up, we’re going to look at a practical five stage model which we can apply to the negotiation
process. By following these steps, we should be able to achieve win/win outcomes and generally
become more successful in our negotiations.

Preparation  Discussion proposeExchangeAgree close

1. Preparation, as we’re often reminded, is the key to success, and it’s worth doing a little
groundwork prior to beginning the negotiation process. Here are some early factors that we
should decide on:

 What’s our goal?

 What’s the goal or need of our opposite number?
 What’s the most obvious route to a win/win scenario?
 Can we anticipate any objections, and do we have a response lined up?

It’s also advisable to line up a ‘best alternative to a negotiated agreement’, or BATNA.

Don't put all your eggs in one basket

In base terms, the BATNA principle is similar to the proverb of ‘Don’t put all your eggs in one
basket’. When we only bring a single proposal to the table, we run the risk of ending up with a
poor deal (or no deal at all). Not every negotiation is going to result in a neatly concluded deal,
so have a contingency in place.

An example situation

Let’s take a very simplified example. Put yourself in the place of a project manager, in urgent
need of some specialist IT equipment. Your closest supplier quickly senses your desperation and
takes the lead in negotiations. With no fall-back option, you’re obliged to meet whatever price
the supplier chooses to set.

Have a BATNA

How do we avoid such occurrences, then? Well, prior to meeting with your supplier, take the
time to make provisional appointments with a couple of alternative dealers (even if they’re
further afield, or haven’t got the exact brand of equipment that you’re after). Once you let your
supplier know that you have options, negotiations should become more flexible. If a favourable
deal can’t be reached, you can walk away.

2.Discussion

Next, we’re ready to start into the negotiation itself. Once the niceties are out of the way, the first stage
is discussion. There are two objectives here – the first of which is to build rapport, which we can do by
recognising our opposite number’s values and by communicating on their level.

The second objective is fact finding. By asking intelligent questions we can identify what the
other person’s objectives are, and so establish their starting point (their best case scenario, or
aspiration) and their bottom line.

Listening skills are very important during this stage of the process, so we should pay close
attention, demonstrate that we’re listening and provide feedback where appropriate.

3. Propose

We’re now in a position to outline our proposal. Whether we’re buying or selling, we should set
out what we have to offer and confidently explain how the potential solution can benefit both
parties.

It’s a good idea to put together a short, punchy pitch.

An elevator pitch is a brief, persuasive speech that you can use to spark interest in what your
organisation has to offer. A good elevator pitch should last no longer than 20 to 30 seconds –
about the length of a short elevator trip, hence the name.

The pitch should be interesting, memorable and succinct, and should explain what makes your
product or service unique.

4. Exchange

What we might traditionally think of as ‘negotiating’ begins at this stage – this is where our
bargaining skills come in, as both sides vie for the best deal possible.

Here are some useful tips.

Where are we flexible?

Managing concessions

Long-term relationships

Don't be afraid to walk away

We should always keep our BATNA in mind. If the negotiation looks like it's going to result in
us making too many concessions, to the extent where it's no longer a win situation, that's when
we need to walk away from the deal.

5. Close and agree

Closing a deal is as important as gaining the initial agreement. Many of us don’t appreciate the
significance of agreeing the next steps – a strong close will ensure that both parties are clear of what will
happen next and that both parties’ expectations are properly managed. We should review the main
points that have been agreed, and, if possible, document the details.

Also, be wary of any last-minute demands that could pop up; some negotiators will suddenly request an
extra concession at a very advanced stage. This is often with the aim of catching us off-guard and gaining
an ‘easy’ concession – once we think everything’s done and dusted, it’s easy to just cave in and avoid
jeopardising the deal. The best course of action, though, is to react calmly, and let your opposite
number know that you’ve got the time and inclination to renegotiate the entire package from the
beginning.

The risk of conflict

Negotiation may occasionally result in conflict, when both parties are unhappy with the deal on
the table and can’t reach agreement. The focus of the disagreement may even shift from the
issues to the individuals themselves, and positions can become quite entrenched.

Unless such instances of conflict are managed, they can escalate to the point at which both
parties feel unable to back down. The key, of course, is compromise.

Below is a version of the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument, designed to measure a

person’s behaviour in conflict situations.(print screen)

Competing

This is an assertive and uncooperative approach, where the goal is to win. The individual will
pursue his or her concerns at the other person’s expense.

Collaborating
Here, the goal is to find a win-win situation. Collaboration between two parties might take the
form of exploring a disagreement to learn from each other’s insights, or trying to find a creative
solution to an interpersonal problem.

Avoiding

Unassertive and uncooperative, the chief aim of the avoiding approach is to delay. The
individual will diplomatically sidestep an issue, postpone it until a better time or simply
withdraw completely from negotiation.

Accommodating

Accommodating is unassertive and cooperative, the opposite of competing. The individual will
neglect his or her own concerns in order to satisfy the needs of the other party, and the aim is to
yield.

Compromising

The compromising approach might entail splitting the difference between two polar positions or
exchanging equal concessions, with the goal of finding a middle ground.

It’s very rare for one person to employ just one of these approaches exclusively, but it’s true to say that
some people will fare better with certain styles than others. Still, you should measure the situation and
your opposite number, and choose how you’ll approach the conflict accordingly.