Resource Folio: Natalie Messina

S00184853
I assess and determine the ability of the
Activity 1: Assisting EAL/D learners student, so that I am able to set
Individualised diagnostic analysis of writing appropriate goals for them.
Context: A Year 9 EAL/D student’s writing is being assessed against 8 levels on the ESL
scales (NSW Department of Education and Training, 2006), and four phases of the EAL/D
Learning Progressions (ACARA, 2011). The teacher has observed that this student’s writing
sits at approximately Level 5 and they exhibit the characteristics of an individual in the late
‘Developing English’ stage. They are capable of writing lengthy, structured texts in different
text types, writing informally and formally, and can correctly use pronouns, nouns, and
suitable time sequencing. They show some awareness of purpose and audience, and can Identified
Identified sustain a simple argument. However, their written expression lacks in grammar, punctuation strengths and
learning goal. and vocabulary. Crucially, this does not impede on their understanding of content. weaknesses.
Accordingly, the teacher aims to improve the student’s writing by strategising and focusing
on planning and editing to develop the students coherence and communicating writing skills.

Description: Below is an example of the student’s attempt at creating a one-paragraph script

for a spoken argument against stereotypes. It is the student’s first written draft.

I would like to address the issue about gender stereotypes I would like to first of saying that I
am against gender stereotypes as it limits the potential of boys and girls. It Puts them down
and make them feel like they are not worth It. People thing that skirts and tights are only for
girls but there are other men out there that were skirts such as Kanye west and David
Beckham, it is not non mainly to wear a skirt. Some men might like dancing in skirts and
dressing up in them. The ‘Don’t judge me by my tights’ article is about a man that says that
people gender stereotype about and say that he is gay but in the article the man in tights states
he is not. people think he Is, when people say stuff about him they lower his self of steam.

Feedback: For this specific task, the teacher gives feedback on the conventions of writing. To
do so in an effective way for the student, the teacher presents this feedback using a table:

Conventions of Plus Minus

English
Feedback is
Spelling Most words are spelled Words highlighted in yellow
correctly. must be checked. Some words
presented
need to be changed to plural. neatly and
Punctuation Attempt to use sentence full- Full-stops are sometimes succinctly to
stops and commas is seen. missing where they are needed. assist the
A semi-colon (;) instead of EAL/D
comma (,) should be used student.
where blue is highlighted.
Grammar Correct use of present tense.

Capitalisation All sentences, except one Capitals are sometimes put

(highlighted in red), begin with
a capital letter.
Word use Great use of words to strengthen
the argument: ‘address, limits,
potential’.
where they are not needed (see
pink highlight). All possessive
names (Kanye West) need to
be capitalised.
Consider changes to words that
are highlighted in green.

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Resource Folio: Natalie Messina
S00184853
Individualised Education Program (IEP) Short-Term Objective: The teacher decides that
to address each convention, this student will re-read their paragraph using a 4-step editing
strategy:
1. correct spelling and check word use, I break down what the learning goal
2. correct punctuation and grammar, is, and how it will be achieved.
3. correct capitals, and,
4. check its complete appearance.
The student will then re-submit their paragraph with a goal to have no more than 2 errors.

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