My Dream Car

Pop! Crack! Chuga-chuga. Grrrrrrr. My car squeaked and puttered and growled to a halt

on the side of the road. Darned thing, I thought to myself. I knew my girl wouldn’t last much

longer, and that’s exactly why I snapped at dad for earlier calling her “Old Faithful.” She was

more like an “Old-Ready To Give Up-Crying For Help-Can’t Wait to Just Pass On.”

Even though I knew she wasn’t going to last much longer, I still loved her. Her military

green body with matte black accents highlighted my personality. Her round headlights with

perfectly rectangular taillights was the epitome of abnormal. And I loved it. At the same time, I

could hear her crying out to me every time I rode with her. I knew she wouldn’t last much

longer. I knew she needed a rest, but still I kept pressing on. With every chance to spend time

with her, I made sure she had a full tank and had plenty of oil. She was always clean, and always

had her waxing. I loved my baby. My car. But now I knew for sure I had to move on.

I got out of my car, hugged her one last time, and then made my way to the nearest town

ahead of me. I walked for several hours before I began to see lights, or even billboards. I was

exhausted so I stopped momentarily to rest under a vandalized picture of our former president,

Mr. Trump. Someone had taken red spray paint and went to work on the photo of his face. He

had devil horns poking out of his temples, vampire-like teeth protruding from his mouth, dark

red glowing eyes, a pointed tail in the background, and a three pronged devil’s trident by his

head. Someone really didn’t like Trump apparently. “Liberal snowflakes these days,” I

immediately muttered under my breath.

Tired of looking at the board, and still shivering from the intense cold, I bit my lip,

blinked my eyes a few times to make sure they still worked, and pressed onward towards the

city. I could see a faintly lit up, flickering sign that appeared to have the town’s name on it. I
knew I was in Pennsylvania still, but during the expedition I had been on for the past few hours I

forgot where exactly in Pennsylvania I was. After I walked past what appeared to be a driveway,

I glanced down the path to see if there was a house down in the distance. It was a lot closer than I

expected it to be, but I decided against stopping after hearing a slight noise which appeared to be

a Larry the Cable Guy rerun. Definitely didn’t want to be part of that. I returned my attention the

goal of the city ahead of me, and again, pressed onward.

I slowly but surely worked my way up until I was close enough to read what the name of

the town was. Allenport. I thought I had an aunt or something like that who lived in this city. I

had no idea where her house was so my best bet from there was to just find a motel to chill in, or

a church pew to crash on, and that’s exactly what I did. I went in search of my stay until I could

find a charger for my phone to contact dad.

Passing through the lonesome seeming town, I took in the few sights that were around

me. I mean, something had to keep my mind off of the cold. I notice a gorgeous looking city

building. Must have been built way back in the colonial times with its style. The bricking looked

like it had been taken care of very well, and the windows looked spotless. Beside it was a small

coffee shop. A sign reading, “Stop by today for 20 cent coffee!” was hanging from the window. I

wished I had gotten there sooner, I could use a pick-me-up. Across the street from the shop was

something I didn’t expect to see in a town this small. There was a car dealership. Not a crappy,

worn down, going to get a terrible deal on a used car dealership, but a brand new Chevy

dealership. I knew where I was going the next day.

After about five minutes of stumbling around the streets, I finally came across a small

bed and breakfast. Lucky for me, the light was still on and I could see someone that I could talk

to. I approached the building slowly. It was painted a cream-white with a dark green trim around
all of the windows. The roof was a dark black shingled one, with a perfect brick chimney up the

center of it. I crept up the green steps of the porch to avoid any creaking, as to not wake any

other guests. I peeked into the diamond shaped window of the door before I knocked so I could

survey everything going on inside.

Inside was an elderly looking lady. She had a pure white afro sitting on top of her head,

slight sags of skin hanging from her jaw, but she had the brightest blue eyes with the most

pleasant sparkle on her cheeks. She looked like she had lived a full and happy life. Across the

room from her was a younger gentleman. Brown hair slicked perfectly back, a long nose, and his

face buried into a rather large book. He’s reading The Grapes of Wrath. That’s a pretty good

book, save the random back-and-forths between chapters. They looked pleasant enough, so I

took a deep breath, and I knocked.

“Hellooooo!!!” the woman bellowed from the other side of the door. She swung the door

open and shrieked in excitement. “Come in! Come in!” I quickly took up her offer and jumped

inside, eager to get out of the cold. The woman immediately began slamming me with questions,

like “what’s your name?” “Where are you from?” “Would you like a room to stay in?” “Do you

have any allergies or special requests?” I answered every question she asked and she was more

than happy to show me to my room once the questions were all answered.

She didn’t stay long in my room, just long enough to set the temperature to my liking,

make sure I had enough blankets, make sure my pillow was fluffed, and tell me goodnight. I

hopped into bed, wrapped up like a burrito, and was out before you could say “get some sleep.”

EH! EH! EH! SMACK! I swatted my alarm clock faster than Usain Bolt. I hate mornings,

but I love food. Knowing Mrs. Handly had an exquisite breakfast ready downstairs, I hopped out

of bed, threw on my shoes, and raced to the dining room.

 “GOOOOOOOOOD MORNIIING!” Mrs. Handly exclaims with glee. She set down the

last plate of food and explained that it was made special for me and my gluten free diet. I was so

excited to get some good home-cooked food, but I knew I had to eat quickly so I could go figure

out what I was going to do about my situation.

“Good morning.” I said back, “All this food looks incredible, but I’m afraid I can’t stay

too long once it is finished.”

“That’s a-ok! As long as you eat something before you go, things will be alright!” She

returned. I sat down in the seat she had prepared for me and dug into the scrambled eggs, bacon,

and golden hash browns. Once I finished mauling my plate, I stood up, thanked the woman for

her kindness, and left the home.

I made my way over to the Chevy dealership I had discovered last night. Inside was a

bald, middle-aged, stereotypical car salesman. He welcomed me with a firm handshake and

escorted me into his office. After a long conversation about my situation, he stood up, told me

that he would be willing to take in my old car in trade for a new one, and then headed out the

door so we could look at the cars in the lot.

There were three rows of brand-spankin’-new SUVs, pickups, and cars all with a slight

hint of frost on them. I really just wanted a car, so we over looked the rows containing SUVs and

pickups, and went straight to the front of the lot. The first car was a basic, yet nice looking blue

Malibu. It wasn’t what I was looking for, so we went to the next vehicle. Sitting in this spot was

a green Camaro. It looked gorgeous, but again it wasn’t what I was looking for. We kept walking

past a few more Malibus, Camaros, Impalas, and Volts before I spotted her. A dark, royal purple,

Chevy Corvette. Perfect. I ran directly over to it and the salesman speed-walked over with his

clipboard in hand.
 “This the one?” he asked.

“You betcha.” I quietly responded. This Corvette was even more perfect for me than my

last girl. I didn’t know it was possible. Now I saw, however, that this was my dream car. One

hundred percent. She was the dream car I never knew I needed. The purple was dark, yet it

shined brighter than the sun. The large wheels had the most beautiful shiny black on them. The

windows had the perfect slight tint to them. Everything about this car, was me. Everything about

me, was this car.

“I’m going to take this one.” I said to the salesman as I frantically shook his hand.

“Perfect!” he grinned, “Let’s go back into my office and do the business!” I followed him

back into his office and plopped back down into the black leather seat across the table from him.

I was so excited that I forgot what all we talked about. All I remember is that the car was mine

for the low price of $199.99 a month!

After the papers were all signed, I sprinted out to the door of my new girl, opened her up,

and hopped into the driver seat. I was so excited! I ran my hands all over the matte black steering

wheel. I ran my fingers across the carbon fiber dash. I then slid the key into the ignition, powered

my bad girl up, and revved her. She sounded perfect.

With radio blasting R. Kelly, I waved goodbye to the salesman, and sped off out of the

parking lot. I hit 100 miles per hour by the time I had gotten to the edge of town, and I was not

slowing down. I was on my way home, going to show my dad my new whip. I was going to flex

on my friends. I was going to get a girlfriend! I was more excited than a kid on Christmas

Morning!
 Things were going great! I was two hours outside of Allenport, the town that treated my

right. I was jamming out to music and I was just taking everything in, and enjoying my new girl.

Then it happened.

Pop! Crack! Chuga-chuga. Grrrrrrr. My car squeaked and puttered and growled to a halt

on the side of the road.