HRE4M - 06 Unit Three/Four Unit Work Huixin Song

Step 1 - Root of Society - The Family

1. How do you understand the description of family as “a sanctuary of life”?

The definition of sanctuary to me is defined as preserving and protecting something
from any harmful or unwanted external forces. Therefore, the description that the family
is a sanctuary of life, tells me that the family is sacred and holy for each of us. So this
means that each of our family is like a place where we can comfortably go to talk out
our problems or just to relax without worrying about rejection.

2. What are the practical ways in which families are called to be “bearers of life”?
As a family, we can follow through Christ's footsteps through the simple and concrete
action of our everyday lives as we reach out to help other families in need.

3. How is the family the primary environment for the moral formation of persons?
It does not matter how a family suffers or what its circumstances are; however, when it

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opens to another family, it is a reflection of God who is tender, merciful and faithful.

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Thus, a family becomes a messenger of compassionate love for us all.

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4. John DeFrain identifies 6 family strengths shared by “strong families”. List and

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explain each of the 6 strengths.
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• Commitment - The members of these strong families are willing to promote to the
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welfare and happiness of each of their family members. They value the unity of
their family.
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• Appreciation - The appreciation is shown by each of the members in a strong

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family.
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• Communication - The members of a strong family have excellent communication

skills and they love to spend time talking with each other.
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• Time - Members of strong families always have quality time to spend with each
other.
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• Spiritual Wellness - It does not matter if they are religious or not, a strong family
have a good sense of the power of goodness or power in life. This helps motivate
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them to succeed in strengthening the structure of their family.

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• Coping Ability - The members of a strong family sees stress and crises as an
opportunity to grow.

5. Which 2 strengths are most present in your family? Explain how are these shown?
The two strongest strengths that are present in my family are commitment and
appreciation. We all commit to the tasks and responsibilities we are told to do in order to
provide ease and a good life to other family members. Appreciation is also shown in my
family because we often celebrate each other’s success and anniversaries, gift each
other, and show our appreciation in many other ways.

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 HRE4M - 06 Unit Three/Four Unit Work Huixin Song

6. For each of the 6 strengths, list one practical strategy that a family could do to foster
that strength in their family.
• Commitment - When a member in your family has a great idea or does a moral deed,
praise or support him/her.

• Appreciation - Try to help out with chores around the house if you can because this
shows how much you appreciate them.

• Communication - If someone in your family is struggling over an issue, you can help
that person to resolve the issue.

• Time - When it is the holidays or weekends, always try to find time to spend quality
time with each other.

• Spiritual Wellness - Whether you are religious or not, always look on the bright side

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and use that as a source of motivation to strengthen your family.

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• Coping Ability - If a family member is stressed or does something wrong, take this as

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an opportunity to reflect on your weaknesses and grow as a family.

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7. How do these elements support the foundation for just a society?
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If every family had these qualities, we would be able to solve most of societies issues
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and so we would be able to help each other with their problems. Thus, the society as a
whole will be in the same boat as us.
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Step 2 - Family as Church

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8. St. John Chrysostom saw them family as a “little church” because of the family’s role
in the formation of people. What are the characteristics that St. John Chrysostom
recognized in a family that relate to it being a “little church”?
The characteristics are oneness, holy, catholic and apostolic.
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9. Summarize the 5 ways in which Christian families grow in faith.

• Emphasize the relationship - A healthy Catholic family should be built on proper
spousal relationships. These relationships are characterized by faithfulness and
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openness into human life, equality, dignity, respect, celebration, intimacy, mutual
understanding, compassion and support.
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• Promote social responsibility - One of the major tasks of families is to lead all to
participate in the social life of society. This can mean promoting the awareness of
our planet, participating in economic life and political issues.

• Become a family in Christ - When the bonds of families are broken, there is a
greater need to support families. Family values are not absolute. Kingship
attachments and rules - defending the families name and honour at all cost - must
be balanced with other family values, such as reconciliation, mutual support, and
growth in faith.

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 HRE4M - 06 Unit Three/Four Unit Work Huixin Song

• Include the excluded - Christians must not forget about the preferential option for
the poor. Therefore, because of this, families can fight for social justice, for the just
treatment of workers, for equality for those who are at the margin. So our homes
should welcome the poor.

• Be an ethical and moral family - The family is the first place where ethical and
moral training takes place. Whether in their dealings with one another and in the
discussion of local and global events, the adults in the family shape the children's
capacity for moral reasoning. The families can help the children to take the first
steps in faith; they can show what it is like for one to love another; they can be the
sign of hope and trust; and they can show how forgiveness and reconciliation takes
place.

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Step 3 - Friendship

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10. How can peer pressure destroy or reinforce he moral foundations introduced by the
family? Give examples.

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When children are with their peers, children will learn to test the ideas and values that
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are given to them by their parents. Children may now find themselves in a "special
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group". Because of this, children will do anything to fit in. Sometimes choices children
make based on what their friends do or say, may harm themselves. For example, some
kids may be led into the influence of doing drugs which is harmful to his/her health.
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However, sometimes the influences from friends and peers may be a good thing.
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Always living with an one sided perspective on the world is not good. Therefore, our
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relationships with our peers and friends allow us to see a view from their perspective
and so this helps broaden a children's perspective on the world by developing their
critical thinking and reasoning skills.
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11. Aside from your family, what person do you think has had the most influence on
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your personality and your concept of yourself in positive ways thus far in your life -
and why?
The person who had the most influence on my personality is Albert Einstein. Albert
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Einstein was thought by teachers as stupid in his early years; however, as he grew
older, he taught calculus and trigonometry to himself. He also formed Einstein's theory
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of special relativity.

12. What person has had the most negative influence in your life, and why?
A teacher I had in grade four had the most negative influence in my life. She was very
degrading and often made fun of me. At that time, I was a new student in Canada and
did not know how things worked. She would often be racist and never stop other kids
who made fun of me because of my race and because of my performance in school.
She often turned a blind eye towards horrible incidences I had and would always make
me feel bad. Even when I visited the school a couple of years ago, she saw me and
would not believe the accomplishments I have made. She insisted that I am not

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 HRE4M - 06 Unit Three/Four Unit Work Huixin Song

hardworking and that I was lying, in front of many others. I would always go home and
cry because of the way she treated me, but that is all in the past.

13. What do you think are some of the “false” ideas about relationships that teenagers
have?
Some false ideas I think teenagers have towards relationships is that the person has to
be attractive on the outside to qualify. This is false because many attractive people have
a bad attitude or personality. Therefore, we shouldn't judge a person based on his/her
appearances.

Step 4 - Finding a Partner

14. What are qualities that you look for in a life partner?
I want to find someone who has a direction in life. He may not be successful but he has

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a plan and he is diligent enough to work towards his goals. An understanding and caring

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man is all I want to ask for.

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15. Once you find a potential life partner, what questions need to be discussed before

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you enter into marriage?
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Common goals as a couple, future plans, and financial issues are some questions that
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are imperative to be discussed before marriage.

16. What are some issues that might cause a marriage to break down?
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Lack of communication and understanding seems like the reason most couples break
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up. This needs to be prevented to avoid wrong turns.

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17. In your opinion, should being in a relationship be a lot of work? In other words,
should it require much effort? Why?
Two people need to constantly contribute to the relationship so that one person is not
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spending too much effort and the other one is only receiving the love. A marriage should
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be a type of equal contribution among two partners to be successful.

18. Do you believe that there is such thing as “the one”? Why?
I don’t quite believe that someone is “the one”, because with understanding and
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patience, all relationships will work out. Consider arranged marriages for example;
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people are forced to live their lives together and most live happily together.

19. What are the differences between infatuation and love?

Infatuation is rushed and impulsive feelings that resemble love, whereas love is a true
emotion and is boundless.

20. Interview a married couple whom you consider to be happy together. Use these and
other questions:
• How did you dating begin?

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 HRE4M - 06 Unit Three/Four Unit Work Huixin Song

Their dating began in high school when they were classmates. They went to a boarding
school so they saw each other from the moment they had breakfast to the moment
everyone was called to bed. They developed good feelings for each other naturally.

• How did you know your relationship was becoming serious?

When he realized that he enjoyed spending time with this girl and that their relationship
had brought happiness for theme. He also did not want to lose and and felt like she was
part of his family and he had the duty to care for her.

• Do you think that a long period of going together before marrying helps a
marriage? Why?
Living together and spending time before marriage does help since you can learn each
other’s flaws and there are not many surprises as they enter into marriage.

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• How important is it to take a variety of people?

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Dating a variety of people is very important; it makes you appreciate your spouse even

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more when you think about how incompatible you are with other women.

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21. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Cohabitation is not a good way to test
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out the potential for a marriage. Explain.
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I disagree with this statement because I think cohabitation is a good way to test out the
potential for marriage. Cohabitation allows the couples to live together as a way to test
their compatibility for each other. In the end, if they find it is too difficult to live together,
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they can end the relationship without any legal consequences. Therefore, to me it
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seems like a win-win situation.

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22. How does the Church attempt to deal with “hot-button” or “red-flag” issues in
society?
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The church usually strives to chart a mid-course. In which the course is moral yet
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pastoral.

23. In what ways does the church stay true to the “Catholic sexual ethics tradition, while
at the same time fostering basic human respect, justice, and pastoral care toward
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gay and lesbian persons?”

The church accepts the fact that all homosexuals are human and they should be treated
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with the same dignity and respect that heterosexuals are treated. However, the church
sees heterosexual genital acts are morally wrong and so basically homosexuals will
have to remain away from any sexual acts.

24. The following is an excerpt from a conversation with the Archbishop of Ottawa
seeing to clarity the teaching of the church. The article is entitled Homosexuality and
the Catholic High School Setting.

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 HRE4M - 06 Unit Three/Four Unit Work Huixin Song

Step 5 - Wedding is not Marriage

25. Identify the essential elements of marriage.

There are five essential elements of marriage.
I. Marriage is defined as an "intimate partnership of life and love" by Catholic teaching.
The man and the woman is the interpersonal relation at the core of marriage.
Marriage is also a communion of a man and woman in all the things of life.

II. The soul or central trait of marriage is love. This love grows from physical, sexual
love to the love in which Christ loved.

III. Love is open to procreation. Love and new life are the gifts of marriage and by its
very nature, the institution of marriage and love is ordered to the procreation and

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education of their children

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IV. Marriage is built on the consent of the man and woman. The Church's canon law
describes this consent as "an act of will by which a man and a woman is to give and

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accept one another for the purpose of establishing a marriage.". The marriage
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covenant implies a giving and receiving from one another their commitment and
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partnership of one's whole life.

V. A a valid marriage between baptized persons is by that very fact a sacrament. x

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26. What is implied by “an intimate partnership of life and love”?

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An intimate partnership of life and love is an interpersonal relationship between a man

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and a woman that share together physical and emotional intimacy. It means that the two
partners are close to each other and they have a private and personal relationship.
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27. Why does a marriage include an openness to receive children?

The institution of marriage and married love, by its very nature, is ordered to the
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procreation and education of the offspring and it is in them that it finds its crowning
glory.
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28. How is marriage similar to and different from other relationships?

Marriage is for life, both partners have to commit to faithfulness for each other and it
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commits one to an integral communion of life. Marriage also demands a level of

personal maturity.

29. Write down your thoughts or any questions you have while reading the article.
It is impossible to find a partner that will make you happy every day. This article tells me
that in life and marriage, one cannot always be happy and cheerful every day; however,
it is normal to be disappointed in a while. So this articles basically tells me that
disappointment in love is healthy.
30. Is there such thing as an easy relationship? Why?

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 HRE4M - 06 Unit Three/Four Unit Work Huixin Song

There is no such thing as an easy relationship because everyone involved in the

relationship has to suffer in a while. Normal relationships are not always easy. They
tend to go smooth and then stop, go smooth again, and then stop. In a healthy
relationship, there will be some arguments and days when you are feeling down.

31. Why is the article titled “Disappointment in Love”? Explain with examples from the
text and life.
The title is called "Accepting Disappointment in Love" because the article tells us that
we will always find ourselves disappointed sometimes in life and so we shouldn't try to
cure our disappointment or run away from it, but instead we should accept
disappointment in our relationships. "No matter how deep a friendship or marriage and
no matter how good, rich in personality, and deep the other person may be, we always
find ourselves somewhat disappointed. " (Accepting Disappointment in Love). An
example in life, is jealousy in a relationship. When one of your best friend forgets to

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return the book you lend him to the library, you get disappointed when you have to pay

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the late fees.

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32. Do you agree with Rolheiser? Why or why not?
Yes, I do agree with Rolheiser because I believe that during a relationship you or the

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other person will always somehow find a way to get disappointed. No matter how hard
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to try to sustain a happy, worry-free relationship, disappointment will always find its way
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into your relationship. Disappointment in love is inevitable. Disappointment is an
emotion that is what makes us human and we should always try to accept it into our
lives.
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