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Paige Duckworth

April Cordova

COMM 1010

20 September 2019

Myself as a Communicator: Self-Reflection

In the beginning of this assignment I took a few assessments and report the information I

received on myself and how I function as a communicator. Through the assessments I was able

to visualize in words and various scores that I am a very outgoing, communicative person. The

second part of the assignment I chose to interview my boyfriend, Noah, my co-worker, Dani and

my Mother, Kellie. My mom has had more conversations with me than anyone and I believe she

truly knows everything about me. Noah and I have been together for a few years and we live

together, so he offers a different perspective. My co-worker, Dani, has only known me for a

couple months, so I think it will be interesting to see her perspective of me and my abilities to

communicate.

Listening

When I asked Noah about my listening skills he said that I was a pretty good listener. He

said he likes that I make eye contact with him when he’s talking about something important.

However, he mentioned that at home sometimes whenever I’m doing something else, i.e. on my

phone, doing dishes, getting ready, I tend to space off a little when listening and then I respond

more vaguely than I should have.

My co-worker Dani said that I listen very well, she likes that I always move my head and

specifically she said she liked that I laugh and respond energetically to her stories. She thinks I
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pay very good attention to her when she’s talking but that I enjoy telling stories more than I

enjoy listening to them, so I sometimes change the topic without meaning to.

My mom said that I listen very emotionally. Meaning, I can put myself in other’s

situation and really hear what they are saying. She said she loves talking to me because I look at

her and smile, which shows I’m interested in what she is saying. She also said I could work on

not talking about myself while listening to someone’s story about themselves, but that it is just

my nature in trying to establish a connection between that person and I.

Nonverbal Communication

I asked Noah about my nonverbal communication skills and he said he can always tell

how I feel or what I want based on how I hold myself or what my “eyes” say. He said whenever

I’m upset and trying to act okay my eyes look very sad, even if I’m smiling and laughing. He

also said I physically touch people when I talk to them and that I hug almost everyone I know

when I first see them. He thinks that is really special.

Dani said I also use my eyes to communication a lot, for example when I am annoyed at a

customer my eyes get really big and I raise my eyebrows at her every single time. She also said

whenever we are talking I turn my body towards her and away from my computer which she

really appreciates and makes her feel like I’m listening to her.

My mom said something similar to what I feel about myself and it’s that I wear my

emotions on my face. She said she can “always tell how I feel because she’s my mom and she

just knows me” which I actually think is true. She can tell if I’m sad even when we don’t talk!!

She said my face shows what I’m feeling. She also said I give off a very inviting ora to those that

I interact with, which allows me to connect with people even without talking to them.

Articulating Needs, Opinions, Views or Concerns

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When I asked Noah how I was at communicating my opinions, concerns and views, he

actually laughed. He said “Oh boy Paige, I know 100% of the time how you feel, think or believe

something should go”. Meaning I am very communicative about how I feel certain things should

be and why I feel that way. He said he has a love/hate relationship with this quality. He said he

appreciates how often I express my concern for his well-being, because it makes him feel like I

care. Also, he said he loves that I’m honest with my feelings all of the time, he called me an

“open book”.

My co-worker Dani said she has noticed me expressing my opinions when it came to

helping her train when she first started at our job. She said she liked how I would tell her the way

I do something, even if it is wasn’t the exact way we were taught, as it usually made it easier for

her to understand.

My mom said something similar to what Noah said, she expressed how openly honest I

am with everyone I speak with. She said I have a “free spirit” and never hide my thoughts. She

said I could work on sharing my opinions, because sometimes I can get nit picky about simple

tasks towards others and that can leave the impression that I am controlling, which is a quality I

do not want to possess.

Communication Weaknesses

When I asked Noah about my communication weaknesses he said that I don’t often

communicate an event or a change in plans, etc. Then I get upset with him when he’s not

prepared or ready to go whenever I get home or whenever I’m ready to go. I think this is true

because sometimes I accidently assume he knows what was discussed, even if I didn’t tell him.

My co-worker said the only communication weakness she has noticed about me is that

occasionally when we are talking and I am on the computer doing work, I won’t look away while
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talking to her. She said it makes sense though because I am working on something else, but it

always nice to look at people when they are talking about something serious and when they are

just simply chatting as well.

My mom said that she thinks I am a very good communicator, except for when my

feelings are hurt. She said I tend to be a people pleaser and I don’t like to be involved in conflict

so I will beat around the bush for awhile until I build up enough confidence to talk about the

issue that hurt my feelings in the first place.

Communication Strengths

Noah said one of his favorite qualities that I have is my ability to talk in any situation and

make everyone feel included and comfortable. He said I am able to communicate with almost

anyone about the most random topics, or the very serious topics. He loves that I tend to be the

center of attention in a group setting while also taking time to talk with every person

individually.

Dani said she loves my ability to tell stories. She said because we sit and work so closely

together for long periods of time it helps time pass as I go into detail about various things that

have happened to me. She said it never feels like she “can’t get a word in” which is also

reassuring because sometimes people who love to talk will talk over others while having a

conversation.

My mom said something very similar to what the other two interviewees said. She said

she loves that I bring “light to any room” through my conversations and my gestures. She said I

am very good at putting myself in others' shoes so it allows me to better communicate and

connect with people.

Having a Conversation With Me

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Noah said that having a conversation with me is always exciting and different. He said

every time I talk about something that I love my expressions are so vivid and my eyes “light

up”. He said this is one of the reasons he thinks I make friends so easily, because I always react

with every kind of emotion in the most intense way. I laugh when I need to and show concern

when it’s needed.

Dani said having a conversation with me is always a good time. She loves that I ask her

questions about her life and what she’s doing or crafting at the time. She loves that I always take

time to listen to her and that she can tell I’m actually listening.

My mom said she loves having conversations with me because we can talk for hours and

hours without ever hitting a dull moment. She said I am the type of person who is “easy” to have

a conversation with, as I can even small talk with someone for hours, which is a quality that

some people lack which can make for awkward situations.

Conclusion

Overall, these interviews helped me to understand myself and the way I communicate

much better than I did before. I liked getting the view from three different people in my life, all

of whom I interact with differently. I think I need to work on communicating in tough situations

that could lead to letting someone down. The only person who pointed this out was my mom,

which I think says a lot because she knows me very well. I was really humbled to see how every

person I interviewed expressed that they love having conversations with me and they noticed that

I put in effort to make everyone feel listened to and included. “Great communication begins with

connection” Oprah Winfrey. I think I relate with this quote because developing a connection

with someone, deep or superficial is important to me. I really want people to know I care about
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what they are saying. I truly enjoyed this experience and will take the praise and the criticism I

received with me as I continue to communicate with others.

Works Cited

“Oprah Winfrey Quote: ‘Great Communication Begins with Connection.".” Quotefancy,

quotefancy.com/quote/880081/Oprah-Winfrey-Great-communication-begins-with-
connection.