HEATHERS: THE MUSICAL SCRIPT

SET THE WESTERBURG LOGO AT THE MIDDLE OF THE 2ND FLOOR

LIGHTS LIGHTS OUT

Veronica September 1st, 1989. Dear Diary-

LIGHTS SUDDEN LIGHTS ON

SONG BEAUTIFUL

LIGHTS BLACKOUT AFTER THE LAST ‘VERONICA’

LIGHTS DIM LIGHTS, BLUISH.

When the lights come back up, Veronica stands in the middle of the stage and

the Heathers are in a corner.

It’s been a week since I became friends with the Heathers. Actually, ‘friends’ isn’t the right
Veronica
word. We are like businessmen; our job is to become popular and be mean to people.

SFX [SFX SCHOOL BELL RINGS]

Martha Hey, Veronica! Wow, you really do look beautiful these days.

Veronica Thank you! Oh and I am really sorry I couldn’t go to your house last time. I have a thing going.

Martha I get that, you’re with the Heathers now.

Martha is cut off by Heather Duke

H.Duke Veronica, Heather wanted to see you.

Heather Duke smiles at Martha but then rolls her eyes after she turns around. Martha exits
and Veronica walks over to the Heathers

Veronica, I need you to fake me a letter in Ram Sweeney’s handwriting. You need something to
H.Chandler
write on- Heather, bend over.

Heather Duke bends over and Veronica places the notepad on her back and writes

Write this: (clears throat) Dear Beautiful, I miss you and been thinking about us in the old days.
H.Chandler
I hope you can come to my house for a party tonight. Miss you, Ram.
 Veronica What’s this for?

H.Chandler I just found out that Ram used to hang out with Martha Dumpstock.

Veronica Yeah, we all did.

H.McNamara Ohh, that’s right. Ram kissed Martha Dumpstock. It was disgusting.

Heather Chandler takes the note and being to walk towards Martha but Veronica blocks her

Veronica No, Heather you can’t give her that. Please don’t do this. Not to Martha.

Heather Chandler turns around and brings the letter up high. H.Duke takes the letter, giving
it to Martha- Veronica begins to argue again.

Veronica Hey! Wait-

LIGHTS RED LIGHTS DOMINATE

SONG CANDY STORE

LIGHTS LIGHTS ONLY AT HEATHERS

Heather Chandler walks to Veronica

H.Chandler See you next lunch, Veronica

Heathers exit, idling to the side.

LIGHTS LIGHTS ILLUMIINATING VERONICA AND JD

Veronica and JD bumps to each other

Veronica Sorry.

JD They are mean people.

Veronica I’m sorry?

JD Those people you were with just now - are mean.

JD starts walking away

Veronica You can’t say mean things to people behind their back, excuse me.

JD turns around

Veronica I didn’t catch your name.

JD I didn’t throw it.

 Kurt and Ram enter from the corner. Kurt grabs JD by the neck

Kurt What are you doin’ over there, sweetheart?

Ram My buddy just asked you a question. (smacks JD on his head few times)

Kurt Hey Ram, doesn’t the cafeteria have a “no fags allowed” rule?

JD They seem to have an open-door policy for assholes though.

Kurt Hold his arm.

SONG FIGHT FOR ME

LIGHTS BLACKOUT

TEN SECONDS INTERVAL

SET THE 7-11 LOGO UP HIGH AND THE COUNTER ON THE STAGE

LIGHTS DIM LIGHTS, BLUISH

SFX [SFX CAR HONKS]

(off-stage) VERONICA! DON’T FORGET THE CORN NUTS IT’S NOT A PARTY WITHOUT CORN
H.Chandler
NUTS!

Veronica Okay, okay! Jeez…

Veronica picks out the corn nuts when JD enters

JD Greeting and salutations, do you want a slurpee with that?

Veronica No, I don’t like slurpees. But if you’re nice - a big Gulp is fine. I’m Veronica, by the way.

JD Jason Dean, you can call me JD.

Veronica All right. So, JD-

JD drinks his slurpee, and Veronica laughs for a bit

Veronica Does your Mommy know you drink all of that crap?

JD Not anymore, when she was alive.

LIGHTS LIGHTS SLOWLY TURNS TO BLUISH

SONG FREEZE YOUR BRAIN

Heather Chandler shows and interrupts them

H.Chandler Veronica.
 Veronica gives the slurpee back to JD and exits.

LIGHTS BLACKOUT

TEN SECONDS INTERVAL

SET THE PLATFORM, BOTTLES AND CUPS, PI

LIGHTS DISCO LIGHTS

SONG BIG FUN

Veronica Okay, okay so it’s salt, lime and theeen shot!

H.Mc No it’s salt then shot-

H.Chandler You’re doing it wrong!

Veronica Really? ‘Cause I feel great!

SONG BIG FUN

Martha enters the party

H.Chandler Martha Dumptruck in the flesh

H.Duke Here comes the Cootie squad, we should-

H.Chandler Shut up, Heather!

H.Duke Sorry, Heather

H.Mc Look who’s with her, oh my god!

HEATHERS Dang, dang, diggity, dang-dang. Dang, dang, diggity, dang-dang!

Veronica I can’t believe you actually came.

Martha It’s exciting right? Oh, excuse me- I have to say hello to Ram. I brought sparkling cider!

H.Chandler Showing up here took some guts, time to rip her out!

H.Duke Well, who’s this horse remind you of, especially the snout!

HEATHERS Dang, dang, diggity, dang-dang. Dang, dang, diggity, dang-dang!

Martha Hi Ram, I wasn’t gonna come. But since you took the time to write that sweet note-
 What note? Why do you gotta be so weird all the time? People wouldn’t hate you if you acted
Ram
normal.

Ram chugs the bottle but spits it out immediately- to Martha’s face

Ram There’s no alcohol in here! Are you trying to poison me?

SONG BIG FUN

Okay, Westerburgers. It’s time to celebrate our upcoming victory over the Razorbacks this
H.Mc
Sunday’s game by whacking apart the piñata.

H.Chandler We need a volunteer.

Martha I don’t really know this game..

H.Mc Let’s show her some Westerburg spirit! Martha, Martha-

STUDENTS Martha! Martha! Martha!

Heather McNamara blindfolds Martha

H.Mc Bring out the piñata!

Heather Duke comes out carrying a big piñata dressed up like Martha. The students start
laughing. Veronica is angered and tries to grab it from Heather Duke

H.Duke Heather, help!

They pull in a tug-of-war. Veronica gets the piñata from the them

Veronica What’s your damage, Heather! If you want this thing, take a swim for it!

Veronica throws the piñata into the pool. She then walks to Martha and takes off the
blindfold

Martha What’s going on?

Veronica Just go home, okay? I’ll explain it to you later.

Martha looks at everyone first, and then to Veronica. Eventually, running off stage

Veronica That’s it. I’m done. I’m resigning myself from the group. This is too much.

H.Chandler (grabs Veronica by the shoulder) No.

Veronica Don’t spin me. I’m not feeling well.

You don’t get to be a nobody. Come Monday, you’re an ex-somebody. Not even the losers will
H.Chandler touch you now. Transfer to Washington, transfer to Jefferson. No one at Westerburg gonna let
you play their reindeer games!
 Veronica staggers from Heather and then throws up unto her shoes. Making her scream in
frustration

H.Chandler I raised you up for nothing! And what’s my thanks? I get paid in puke!

Veronica Oh, lick it up, baby. Lick it up!

H.Chandler I know who I’m going to eat lunch with on Monday, do you?

Everyone turns their back on Veronica when she got closer. Then runs off the stage. The rest
of the students cheers as they gallop exiting the stage

Veronica appears from the side

SONG DEAD GIRL WALKING

LIGHTS BLACKOUT

LIGHTS BACK ON, Heather Chandler is sitting on the side

H.Chandler Hello, slut.

Veronica Heather? How did you get in here?

I’m like oxygen, I’m everywhere. Now the school will know that goody-two-shoes Veronica is
H.Chandler
nothing but a dirty whore!

Veronica Heather.. why are you so determined to hurt me?

H.Chandler Because I can! It’ll be so very.

STUDENTS VERY. VERY. VERY

Veronica screams because of her nightmare and JD wakes her up

Veronica I have to go the Heather. I have to apologize.

JD Why? Well, I’ll go with you.

Veronica For what?

JD For back up.

Veronica (laughs softly) Thanks, by the way. You are my first.

LIGHTS LIGHTS SLOWLY DIM, RED LIGHTS DOMINATES NOW AFTERWARDS

They walk into Heather Chandler’s house

 Veronica Heather? Heather?

H.Chandler (drowsily) What?

Veronica It’s me Veronica, I came to apologize.

I hope you brought knee pads to kneel on, bitch! Give me an hangover cure and I’ll think about
H.Chandler
it.

Veronica starts to look inside her kitchen cabinet

Veronica Here it is, I’ll just mix this up and we’re all set!

JD Or.. (grabs the drain cleaner and puts some in the mug) We could give her this.

Veronica Stop it dude, it’ll kill her.

JD Thus, ending her hangover!

Veronica (laughs for a bit) JD, stop.

JD immediately stops and coos Veronica

JD All right, I’m sorry. I went too far.

H.Chandler Where’s the damned drink? Chop-chop!

Veronica goes to Heather Chandler’s room

Veronica Here you go, Heather.

H.Chandler You took so long- and look, you even brought your boy toy here. Give me that.

Heather Chandler grabs the drink and immediately chugs it, soon after she’s close to her
knees.

H.Chandler Co-Corn… nuts..!

As Heather Chandler falls down and is still holding Veronica’s knee- Veronica puts her arm
away and freaks out.

Veronica Oh my god, oh my god. I just killed my best friend!

JD --and your worst enemy.

Veronica Oh, same difference!

JD You could go to prison by this! Uhm, we could write a suicide note!

Veronica T-That’s good.

SONG ME INSIDE OF ME

LIGHTS SPOTLIGHT. ONLY AT HEATHER CHANDLER

SFX [SFX PHONE RINGS]

Veronica picks up the phone from the other side

Veronica Hello?

H.Mc Veronica? I need help, I’m at the cemetery.

Veronica What’s wrong?

H.Mc Just hurry up, please. It’s an emergency.

Veronica Okay.

LIGHTS BLACKOUT. WHEN LIGHT COMES BACK ON IT SHOWS HEATHER MCNAMARA INSIDE A CAR.

Veronica sees her, knocks at the window and Heather McNamara rolls it down

Veronica Hey, (points at Kurt passed out on the ground) uhm, is he okay?

Oh, he just passed out. Me, Kurt, Heather Duke and Ram are going to pour beer on Heather’s
grave, but Kurt and Ram drank it all. After that, Heather and Ram went away from me together
H.Mc
and then Kurt started grabbing men and wouldn’t stop. He said he would only stop if I got you
to come.

Veronica (in disgust) I’m leaving now.

As Veronica walks to the exit, Kurt approaches her

Kurt Hey, ‘Ronicaaaa (drunk) I waited ten whole beers for you!

Kurt falls on the ground again, when Heather Duke shows up from the side with Ram holding
her ankles and being dragged in

H.Duke Damn it, Ram. I said, I’m done!

Ram Heather, don’t walk away!

H.Duke Sober up, idiot. Heather, unlock the door.

Heather Duke gets to the passenger seat [SFX CAR DOOR OPENS] and shuts the door behind
her [SFX CAR DOOR SHUTS]
 You can’t leave me like this! (hovers to the car door) [SFX SLAMS] Ugh..
Ram
You’re causing physical pain in my ‘area’. It’s science! I need some relief!

Ram turns to Veronica, only noticing her now

SONG BLUE

LIGHTS BLACKOUT. THEN A LIGHT ILLUMINATES ONLY VERONICA

Dear Diary, the only person who could control Kurt and Ram was Heather Chandler- and now,
Veronica
she is dead.

Veronica approaches Heather Duke and Heather McNamara

Oh hey guys. I am actually waiting for an apology from both of you for being stone-cold bitches
Veronica
last night.

Heather Duke ignores Veronica

Veronica Uhm, helloooO?

H.Duke I am cleaning out Heather’s locker, a little respect?

Veronica Huh, why are you out here messing with Heather Chandler’s stuff, anyway

H.Duke (gasps) I found it!

Heather Duke finds Heather Chandler’s red scrunchie and ties it into her hair

H.Mc But that’s Heather’s scrunchie-

H.Duke Shut up, Heather.

H.Mc Sorry, Heather…

JD enters

H.Duke Heather Chandler is gone. It’s up for me to replace her.

Veronica Replace Heather Chandler?

Please. You need to worry less about me, and worry more about your reputation. Kurt and
H.Duke
Ram have been telling the whole school about your… threeway last night.

JD Threeway?

Veronica No, but there’s no threeway- nothing happened.

H.Duke I remember so differently… I remember that there was a-

 SONG BLUE (REPRISE)

Veronica runs over to where JD is standing at the side of the stage. He opens his arms and
she buries her face in his chest

JD approaches Kurt and Ram with the intent to fight, but they team up with another student
to knock him down.

STUDENTS Freak! Slut! Psycho! Slut! Punkass! Slut! Freak! Slut! Psycho! Slut! Punkass! Whore..

Everyone exits excluding JD and Veronica. Veronica runs beside JD and kneels, who’s still on
the floor

Veronica Are you okay?

JD Yeah, what about you?

Veronica I’m fine-

Veronica covers her mouth with one hand and begins to sob

Veronica I’m sorry about the crying, I’m just-

SONG OUR LOVE IS GOD

LIGHTS THE LIGHTS FLASH ONCE MORE, AND THEN A BLACKOUT

LIGHTS LIGHTS ILLUMINATE VERONICA BY HERSELF AND TWO HELMETS/FOOTBALLS

Dear Diary, Kurt and Ram died. And they were just seventeen- they could’ve tuned out good,
Veronica
but now we’ll never know.

JD enters

JD No one’s getting in through my bedroom window lately.

Veronica Take a hint.

JD Okay, I get it. You’re mad.

Veronica No, I don’t think you do. “Ich luge” bullets? You lied to me. I did not want them dead!

JD Did too.

Veronica Did not!

JD Did too!

Veronica Did not!

 JD Hey! Did they make you cry?

Veronica Yes

JD Well, can they make you cry now?

Veronica No, but you can.

JD claps his hands and walks towards Veronica

So, who’s next? Should we go for Heather Duke? She’s the one who started that threeway
JD
rumor.

Veronica What? I do not accept this! We already killed three people- this ends right here, right now.

What? You’d rather go to jail, hm? And then give a free pass to the thugs who hurt people? Evil
JD
jerks that make life so unbearable that you can’t stand to live in the world anymore!

There is a long pause

Veronica JD, how did your mom die?

A long pause again

My dad said it was an accident but I am certain that my mom knew what she was doing. My
JD mom walked inside a building two minutes before my dad blew it up, she waved at me out of
the window and.. ka-boom.. She left.

Veronica … I am so sorry.

It’s all right now. The pain is somehow bearable. Anyway, you and I are special, we have a lot
JD
of work to do.

Veronica What work?

JD Making the world a decent place for people who are decent.

Veronica H-How?

JD When every asshole is dead!

Veronica pushes JD away from her

SONG SEVENTEEN

LIGHTS AFTER THE BLACKOUT, THE LIGHTS GO BACK UP ON THE STAGE

Veronica by herself again, Heather Chandler enters the stage (only visible/audible to
Veronica)

And they lived happily ever after! (chuckles) You really believe that? You think all goes back to
H.Chandler
normal? Don’t give me that wounded look, you know exactly who he is and you know it.
 Veronica Stop talking.

Martha enters

Martha Veronica, I need you help! Something doesn’t add up.

Veronica Why?

Martha I think Ram and Kurt were murdered!

H.Chandler Well, screw me gently with a chainsaw! Detective is onto you, Veronica.

Veronica That’s ridiculous! Who would kill Ram and Kurt?

Martha I think it was your boyfriend, JD. You saw how he went after them in the lunchroom.

Kurt and Ram enters (only visible/audible to Veronica)

Kurt Yeah man, it sucked.

Ram I think Veronica’s going to lady prison.

Kurt Punch it in! Hahahaha!

Kurt and Ram fistbumps and exits

Martha I wanted to look into JD’s lockers. Do you have his combination?

H.Chandler I bet you’ll find something there, like- ‘Ich luge’ bullets?

Veronica That’s a wild theory Martha. Ram was gay.

Martha He kissed me remember? On the football field?

Veronica In kindergarten.

Martha He even invited me to his party! I’m going to confront JD.

Veronica grabs Martha by the shoulder and starts to laugh

Ram didn’t write you the letter, I did. Everyone in the school was up for it, and Ram laughed
Veronica
harder than everyone else. He was a dick. And now, he’s dead.

Veronica turns her back to Martha

Veronica You have to move on now, Martha.

 Martha sobs as she runs off-stage

Veronica Oh my god.

Heather Chandler and Veronica look at each other

Veronica Look, I had to hurt her, okay? If I didn’t do that, JD might-

H.Chandler --kill her? Is that what you are afraid of? (gasps dramatically) Don’t you trust him?

Heather exits. Ms. Flemming and other students enter

Hello, Westerburg! We have a general assembly- don’t mind the cameras and news network-
they’re just here to document this significant moment. Suicide is a hot topic right now. And
Ms. Flemming
according to my senior thesis on Berkeley, the way to eliminate suicide is by first eliminating
fear! We must create a safe zone where we can feel we are all equal!

SONG SHINE A LIGHT

Come on kids, I want you to work with me. I want you to share your pain. I want you to drag in
Ms. Flemming
into light and all of us can look at it!

Heather McNamara goes forward

H.Mc I thought about killing myself.

H.Duke ..Heather, what the hell are you doing? Get back in line!

Ms. Flemming Shh, shh. Zip it! Keep talking, Heather. You are in a safe place! Share, it’s gonna be okay.

SONG LIFEBOAT

What’s your damage, Heather? Are you saying that Westerburg’s not a nice place? Where’s
H.Duke your school spirit? You don’t deserve to wear our school colors! Why don’t you hop in your
little lifeboat of yours and get the hell out of here!

Ms. Flemming Heather Duke! Let’s not be hasty and mean-spirited here!

GIRL 1 Oh look, Heather’s going to cry.

The rest of the students laugh as Heather McNamara runs off-stage

Ms. Flemming Heather Duke, you are so suspended! Turn the cameras off, turn them off I say!

Veronica Is this what you care about? TV cameras?

Ms. Flemming (gasps) I care about saving lives!

You are all useless! You are all idiots! And Heather Chandler was a monster, just like Kurt and
Veronica
Ram- and they didn’t kill themselves, I killed them!
 Veronica realizes what she said and steps back

Veronica So, what do you all think of that?

All the students laugh and Heather Duke gets closer to Veronica

H.Duke Some people will say anything to make them popular…

VERONICA AND JD RUNS OFF-STAGE. THE LIGHTS DIM AND TURNS BACK ON WITH HEATHER
LIGHTS
MCNAMARA HOLDING A MEDICATION CAP

SONG SHINE A LIGHT (REPRISE)

Veronica No, no, no, no, stop!

Heather McNamara falls down to her knees and whimpers for a bit

Don’t you dare kill yourself - We have ups and down. And if you are happy every single day of
Veronica
your life then you are not human. You’re a game show host.

Veronica takes out her hand to Heather McNamara, Heather spits out the content of the
bottle to Veronica’s hands

H.Mc Thanks for coming after me.

Veronica You’re welcome.

LIGHTS DIM. WHEN IT COMES BACK UP, JD IS CLAPPING WHILE FOLLOWING VERONICA
LIGHTS
BEHIND HER.

JD Good work on your little confession over there, babe! I can’t believe they still had no idea!

Veronica Stop JD. Don’t call me. Don’t follow me.

JD Oh come on, Veronica-

Veronica You don’t know the difference between right and wrong.

JD Veronica- Come back!

Veronica We are over!

JD I love you!

Veronica turns around, freezes and realizes that JD is pointing a gun to her. He aims it down
away from Veronica and holds out his other hand for her

Veronica Good bye, JD.

A DIM LIGHT APPEAR WHILE HEATHER DUKE AND JD IS ON THE SIDE, WHILE MARTHA SITS
LIGHTS
QUIETLY
 JD hands Heather an envelope

H.Duke What’s in this?

You see, I really like your childhood picture with Martha Dunnstock, you both have these cute
JD
little pigtails!

H.Duke Where did you get that?! What do you want, money?

JD I just wanted a favor

Sure, but get rid of these things. These photos are ancient history, no one cares about these
H.Duke
anymore. No one cares about Martha Dumptruck.

LIGHTS THE LIGHTS DIM EVEN MORE, MARTHA’S THE ONLY ONE AT THE STAGE

SONG KINDERGARTEN BOYFRIEND

LIGHTS BLACKOUT

Veronica and Heather McNamara are together when Heather Duke suddenly approaches
them with a clipboard

SONG YO GIRL

SONG MEANT TO BE YOURS

SONG DEAD GIRL WALKING

SONG I AM DAMAGED

SONG SEVENTEEN (REPRISE)