Jollay 1

Abby Jollay

Kretzer

ENG 1201

17 April 2020

Domestic Violence and Childhood Trauma

In the United States alone, on a daily basis twenty people a minute are physically

abused in a domestic and intimate relationship. To expand on this, that equals over 10 million

men and women a year. Those numbers alone are upsetting, but bring the thought of children

into this as well. 1 in every 15 children are exposed to domestic violence or spousal abuse

yearly, and 90% of those children are directly witnessing the abuse transpire (NCADV.org).

That’s a staggering but very real statistic; that’s two children in your child’s classroom. This

could be your child’s best friend witnessing such a heinous act that, as a young child, shouldn’t

even be in their heads. This begs the question, how, at this impressionable age, does this affect

the children witnessing the abuse? What mental, emotional, and physical tolls can this take on

the child? How does this affect the child’s future relationships with their significant others and

their relationship with themselves? Spousal abuse has a great impact on children, and is a

leading factor in what causes children to themselves be in an abusive relationship, can lead to

substance abuse, and has the ability to cause the child to develop trauma related disorders due

to their impressionable age.

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Domestic and Intimate Partner Homicide by Victim Sex

To begin, all of the research in this paper draws back to one story, the entire reason this

was the chosen topic for this paper. A doctor and a high up accountant fell in love and had two

children. Indeed, this sounds ideal; they bring in plenty of money, they have a great house, their

children are brilliant and smart, one even eventually going on to be the valedictorian and

student body president of his class. Peering into their life from the outside, they seem to be

perfect, but as soon as the door closes, everything changes. The father, an abusive alcoholic,

and the mother, a smart and manipulative narcissist, are constantly at war. Plates thrown, glass

shattered, blood everywhere. The two children are witnesses to this all, each small argument

that escalates to a physical altercation. This goes on for years, until the oldest daughter finds
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something to cope with the problems at home: heroine. This is when the younger brother finds

his sister overdosing in her bedroom, vomit all over herself. From the outside of this house, you

would never expect the daughter of this perfect, all American family to be close to death.

However, you would also never expect that the son has an addiction to Xanax and alcohol,

causing his own overdose, several times, making it through each time. While the young girl was

resilient and able to come back from these childhood traumas, the young boy still struggles

today as a man. He suffers from many personality disorders, some inherited from his mother

(such as narcissism and bipolar disorder), some from trauma, like anxiety and depression, and

some strong addictions. The question sits and begs to be answered: what caused this? The

answer hides just as well as the bruises left on the parents: domestic violence.

What needs to be stated is, in this situation, these children were never physically

abused. They never had a hand laid on them, never so much as a spanking. This, however,

matters little. Children who witness violence in the home and children who are directly abused

may display many similar psychological effects, according to Melissa Stiles, a trusted doctor as

well as professor at the University of Wisconsin-Madison Medical School, specifically in the

department of family medicine. She tells the reader that there are several variables that debate

whether or not children will become more violent as a result of witnessing traumatic events,

such as gender and social support. In fact, young girls who witness abuse are less likely than

boys to become violent (Stiles). To summarize, regardless of who is being abused in the house,

the child is still at risk of the traumatic effects left behind.

To start us off, it’s no secret that children raised in houses of violence and abuse have a

higher risk of becoming aggressive themselves. “Childhood exposure to domestic violence can
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be associated with increased display of aggressive behavior, increased emotional problems

such as depression and/or anxiety…” (Fantuzzo). As impressionable as children are, even from

birth, they’re able to pick up on domestic violence in the household. Children are most

impressionable from the ages of two to three, but recent studies showed the children and

adolescents from six to 14 are at highest risk of picking up habits within the household. The

more often they witness the abuse, the more normalized this can become in the child’s head.

The NCADV, or the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, has done research that

suggests that children who grow up in an abusive household and witness these acts are more

likely to partake in violence or abuse as they get older, whether that be their relationships or in

general. Due to the fact that these children are witnessing this sort of act in their home, this

becomes the norm for them. Why should they act differently in their future relationships? This

is what they know. In addition, children raised in violent homes learn that violence is a way to

solve their problems. With this being said, this increases the likelihood of these children

growing up and using violence against their peers and their significant others. While some

children find themselves being the abuser after witnessing domestic violence, others find

themselves to be the abused. As adults, these children often believe this violence is normal in

relationships and stay in these abusive relationships (mayoclinic.org). This causes the cycle to

continue.

As previously stated, children who are raised in violent homes have a tendency to solve

many of their issues with violence. This means that there’s a higher probability of children

getting into fights and having a higher chance of being charged with different assault based

crimes. Not only this, but because of the increased risk of children growing up with violent
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tendencies, this increases the risk of abuse, which can go hand in hand with intimate partner

homicide. The NCADV brings up the statistics of domestic violence and guns, which shows an

increase in intimate partner homicide over the last few years. Typically, women are on the

receiving end of the gun, and it’s boldly stated that if there is a firearm in the presence of a

domestic abuser, this can increase the likelihood of femicide by 400%. Violent offenders have

the ability to get weapons, which can increase the chances of an argument going awry.

Secondly, another issue within the realm of children witnessing domestic violence is the

risk of substance abuse. As previously stated, both the children in the story ended up abusing

different substances. What was the factor behind this? Was it witnessing their father’s addictive

personality, or witnessing the domestic violence, or both? Could it be something entirely

different? According to Traci Pederson, a freelance psychology writer published in several high

profile psychology journals, a new study by the University of Toronto states that children who

witness domestic violence are at much higher risk of substance abuse and addiction. Not only

does witnessing abuse cause children to be more likely than their peers to try and abuse

substances, but it always causes them to be 3 to 4 more times likely to become addicted and

dependent on these substances.

Thirdly, while most children are resilient, chronic and recurrent witnessing of abuse can

lead children to develop trauma induced disorders. While many people look at Post Traumatic

Stress Disorder (PTSD) as a “war disorder”, this is not the case. PTSD can affect anyone, at any

age, who has witnessed a serious traumatic event. For some children, like those in our story,

the witnessing of domestic violence was enough to cause it in the young boy, who is now a

man. Being in a relationship with this man, you learn a lot about their past. This man would
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never go to the doctor or a therapist to talk his issues out; he would live with them and drink

them away. The Stanford Children’s Health Organization gives us a little deeper insight on this,

such as symptoms, causes, and what accompanies this disorder. Childhood PTSD can last a

lifetime, which is often caused by something the child went through or witnessed, and is

affected by how resilient the child is, how bad the event was, and how often it happens. or

PTSD is often accompanied by depression, anxiety, and substance abuse. Symptoms of this

disorder can range anywhere from sleeping issues to increased violence to lack of affection

towards others. Those with PTSD are all at a much higher risk of anxiety and depression,

especially as they grow up if the disorder isn’t taken care of (health.harvard.edu). Not only is

PTSD a very real possibility, witnessing trauma and abuse has the ability to change how a child

acts and feels. Many adults who witnessed domestic violence as children report having an

extreme lack of trust and feeling powerless in their lives, even if the abuse witnessed was 30

years prior. Domestic violence, causing childhood trauma, mentally takes a toll on children and

changes the way the child lives, especially growing into adulthood.

In this hectic and corrupted world we share, one of the most innocent things on this

planet is a child. While it can be argued that children can grow up in perfectly normal

households and become abusive spouses or worse, the research and science behind this subject

makes it higher risk for the children witnessing the abuse from a young age. Although each case

is different, one thing is clear: the risk of a recurring and generational cycle of domestic abuse is

increased by children who witness spousal abuse.

In conclusion, children witnessing domestic violence, from birth and on, have the

potential to cause lifelong mental damage, substance abuse, and have the ability to continue a
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cycle of abuse as the child grows up and has their own relationships. In the beginning of this

research paper, the “perfect” family was anything but this, and this is not just a hypothetical

family. From personal experience, I can firsthand identify the problems that childhood trauma

can cause and how children who were raised in these environments treat their significant

others, their friends, and their family. Children come into this world innocent, no malice in their

hearts, and nothing but a positive outlook on life. It’s what is shown to them growing up,

especially while they’re impressionable and still learning wrong from right, that makes them

into the person they become.

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Works Cited

Fantuzzo, John W., and Wanda K. Mohr. “Prevalence and Effects of Child Exposure to Domestic
Violence.” The Future of Children, vol. 9, no. 3, 1999, pp. 21–32. JSTOR,
www.jstor.org/stable/1602779. Accessed 19 Apr. 2020.

Goodman, Michael L., et al. “Neglect, Sexual Abuse, and Witnessing Intimate Partner Violence
During Childhood Predicts Later Life Violent Attitudes Against Children Among Kenyan
Women: Evidence of Intergenerational Risk Transmission From Cross-Sectional Data.”
Journal of Interpersonal Violence, vol. 35, no. 3/4, Feb. 2020, pp. 623–645. EBSCOhost,
doi:10.1177/0886260516689777.

Harvard Health Publishing. “Past Trauma May Haunt Your Future Health.” Harvard Health, Feb.
2020, www.health.harvard.edu/diseases-and-conditions/past-trauma-may-haunt-your-
future-health.

“NCADV: National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.” The Nation's Leading Grassroots Voice
on Domestic Violence, ncadv.org/statistics.

Pedersen, Traci. “Child Abuse or Witnessing Parental Violence Tied to Later Substance Abuse.”
Psych Central, 8 Aug. 2018, psychcentral.com/news/2016/06/28/childhood-abuse-
witnessing-parental-violence-linked-to-later-substance-abuse/105443.html.

“Recognize the Signs of Domestic Violence against Women.” Mayo Clinic, Mayo Foundation for
Medical Education and Research, 25 Feb. 2020, www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-
lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/domestic-violence/art-20048397.

Robinson, Lawrence. “Emotional and Psychological Trauma.” HelpGuide.org, 24 Feb. 2020,

www.helpguide.org/articles/ptsd-trauma/coping-with-emotional-and-psychological-
trauma.htm.

“Stanford Children's Health.” Stanford Children's Health - Lucile Packard Children's Hospital
Stanford, www.stanfordchildrens.org/en/topic/default?id=post-traumatic-stress-
disorder-in-children-90-P02579.

Stiles, Melissa. “Witnessing Domestic Violence: the Effect on Children.” American Family
Physician, 1 Dec. 2002, www.aafp.org/afp/2002/1201/p2052.html.

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