Example #1

If a parent was whipped for doing something inappropriate when they were a child, one

can ​portend​ that that parent will do the same to their children. The same goes to say that if a

parent was never corrected for​ ​their mistakes and wrongdoings when they were a child, then they

would think their actions are acceptable and go on to not correct their children when they violate

the rules. Mark Laita became a witness to this truth when he uncovered the backstory of a

homeless man on the streets of Los Angeles, by the name of James–a convicted rapist and

murderer who was banished from his family for raping his own mother at sixteen and raping and

killing another young lady in Louisiana. In the interview Laita comes to find out that, everyday

since the earliest age he could remember, James was molested by his whole family: his mother,

his two sisters, and his father. He was also constantly beaten by his brother. James reveals that

through the abuse he experienced, his family taught him that “rape and sexual crimes were okay

as long as you cared about the other person… It was how you showed you cared for the other

person… It was okay to force myself and do what I wanted to do” (Laita 3:43). He also

continues to say that he raped his mother at the age of sixteen because he “truly did not know the

difference between right and wrong sexually… It was perfectly normal in our family… It was a

form of self expression” (Laita 5:55). James’ ​haunting​ life makes him the model human-being

of the generational cycle of abuse. His childhood was filled with abuse through which his social

cognitive skills were wired to the belief that it was acceptable to force himself onto others if he

wanted to; despite their rejection. This resulted in him contributing to what is dangerous about

society, being banished from his entire family, and finding himself in prison on multiple

occasions.

Example #2
 Forgiveness is one of the most difficult virtues for anyone to acquire. It is not easy to

forgive and love someone who always does wrong against oneself and others. In christianity,

Jesus teaches his followers the importance of forgiveness; everyone should be forgiven and

shown mercy. He teaches it through a parable expounded in Matthew 17:24-35. A man could not

pay back his debt to the king. Instead of selling the man off into slavery, the king forgave him,

canceled his debt, and let him go. In spite of this, the man–who was forgiven and his debt

canceled by the king–threw his fellow servant in prison for not repaying a debt he owed to him.

Once the king heard of this he grew angry and threw the man into prison to be tortured for not

forgiving his fellow servant as he was forgiven. Although it may be difficult and aggravating, it

is imperative that one forgives from the heart. Just as the king–in the midst of his anger–forgave

the servant of his debt when he begged forgiveness, God–who Hates sin–forgives those who

genuinely repent. Therefore, how does one believe they have the right to refuse to forgive

another for their wrongdoings, when they were forgiven of their own? This question is the

essence of the lesson behind the parable; God will treat one the same way the king treated the

servant, if one does not forgive from the heart. Everyone has done wrong, so it would behoove

one to extend the same mercy and forgiveness to another, that was extended onto them.

Example #3
In a similar fashion [to the Christian teachings of forgiveness], Buddhists believe that

everyone should be forgiven and move on from the past. A story recited by Sofo Archon states

how a man spat in the Buddha’s face and the next morning, the man–who spat on Buddha–threw

himself at Buddha's feet and asked for forgiveness. In response the Buddha explained that he was

not the man that was spit on; therefore, he could not forgive him since he did not have a grudge

against him. He then went on to explain that he [the man who spit on Buddha] was not the same
man either, so they should forget about it (​Archon 1). Change and transformation occurs each

day within people. Buddhists express the fact that people change everyday so they therefore can

not hold a grudge against a person because they are new; whereas, Christians express that

everyone on earth has done wrong and sinned, and everyone–who has genuinely repented–has

been forgiven by God, therefore they should forgive others and extend the grace and mercy unto

others, as was extended unto them. Buddhists emphasize daily transformations as a reason to

forgive; Christians emphasize one’s own fault and extended mercy as a reason to forgive. This is

due to their difference in belief. Buddhists do not believe in God or any other high power. They

believe that nothing is fixed or permanent and that change is always possible. On the other hand,

Christians believe in God–who created heaven and earth–and Jesus Christ, the son of God. So

the forgiveness of Buddhists can be seen as glossing over the matter whereas the forgiveness of

Christians can be seen as humbling oneself and forgiving from the heart. Nevertheless, both

entities stress unconditional forgiveness.

Example #4
The continuous traumatizing experiences can also open the doors to many other

dangerous avenues such as drug and alcohol abuse. Many people use drugs and alcohol to escape

the pain of their past and forget everything, but according to Isaac Alexis, “...research shows that

alcohol can actually complicate symptoms of anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress

disorder” (Alexis 3). The negligence of one person to recognize the cycle they are trapped in and

to make a choice to stop it, can cause numerous people everywhere to suffer. Even in their

attempt to escape the suffering, they acquire more pain and turmoil. This is what makes the

world such a lamentful and dangerous place. Everyone on earth has the freedom to do as they

please, but not everything is healthy or beneficial to themselves or society.

Example #5
In addition to this [the definition of cycles], it is imperative that one understands the

importance of social and cognitive skills. According to Scott A. Miller, PhD, social cognition

“ecompasses beliefs about others, the self… as well as beliefs about specific aspects of people

(e.g thoughts, desires, emotions)...” (Miller 1). The formation of social cognitive skills is the

most important development in a child’s brain. It is extremely reasonable to conjecture that

during this formation of the brain a child will constantly be surrounded by family; from their

parents behavior and interactions with each other, that child will form their skills around that

behavior and copy it.

Example #6
The world-known phrase “happy wife, happy life”is true; however, as mentioned by

Kristin Moore, it is important to note that individual satisfaction is important to a healthy

marriage; husbands need satisfaction as well. In an episode of ​Married at First Sight​ one of the

couples were sitting down with Pastor Cal and were talking about their needs. The husband was

saying he is happy as long as she is happy and he was comfortable with going at her pace. But

then Pastor Cal had to jump in and explain that even though he is a giver, givers run out and he

needs to communicate what he wants from her as well. His wife also cautioned him on doing that

because she also wanted to make sure she met his needs as well in order to truly receive all the

benefits of the experience. The husband eventually figured out what he wanted and needed from

his wife--physical intimacy (kissing, holding hands, etc.)--and just as he was able to adapt to her

needs and wants to make her happy, she was able to adapt to his needs and wants, ensuring an

equal contribution between the both of them. In a healthy marriage, both spouses work to make

sure the other partner's needs are met so both of them are comfortable and feel satisfied in the
relationship. Even though the husband claimed to be fine with going at his wife’s pace, his wife

made it a point for herself to discover what he wanted from her, resulting in a healthy

environment and atmosphere between the two of them.