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“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 2
FADE IN
MARCUS‟ BEDROOM
The lump under the covers slowly moves and an arm emerges
from underneath to turn off the alarm. He misses the
button the first couple of times until he finally succeeds
in turning it, and the music, off.
KITCHEN
MARCUS
Hey mom.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 3
MARCUS‟ MOM
Well good morning sleepyhead.
MARCUS
Sleepyhead? I got up time this morning.
MARCUS‟S MOM
That may be so but you look exhausted.
How late did you stay up watching TV?
MARCUS
I wasn‟t watching TV, I was studying for
my History exam.
MARCUS‟S MOM
That exam isn‟t until next week.
MARCUS
I know but I need help in that class so
I wanted to get a head start.
MARCUS‟ MOM
How come I don‟t believe you?
MARCUS‟ SISTER
(smiling)
I bet he was talking on the phone with
his girlfriend.
MARCUS‟ MOM
Marcus, you have a girlfriend?
MARCUS
No.
MARCUS‟ SISTER
Yes he does, her name is Stacey.
Marcus walks over to his sister and tickles her until she
starts laughing uncontrollably.
MARCUS
And how do you know that? Huh, little
girl!?!
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 4
MARCUS‟ SISTER
Because I heard you on the phone with her
the other day.
MARCUS
Well Stacey is not my girlfriend, she‟s
just a friend.
MARCUS‟ MOM
Stacey? Isn‟t that the girl you took
to the prom?
MARCUS
Yes, but only as friends.
MARCUS‟ DAD
I think it‟s very healthy for a boy of
Marcus‟ age to have a girlfriend. It
teaches him responsibility and customer
service.
MARCUS‟ MOM
Customer service?
MARCUS‟ DAD
Yes, customer service. Having a girlfriend
teaches a guy how to build relationships
which is vital in today‟s business world.
MARCUS
Interesting take on things as always dad,
but Stacey is not my girlfriend.
MARCUS‟ DAD
That‟s a shame.
MARCUS‟S MOM
Cereal Marcus? I‟m making scrambled eggs
for us.
MARCUS
Thanks but I just feel like cereal today.
(MORE)
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 5
MARCUS (cont‟d)
Besides I have to hurry up and get to
school. I‟m meeting up with some friends
before homeroom to get some early studying
in.
Marcus grabs a seat at the table and digs into his cereal.
MARCUS‟ DAD
How‟s the Honda Accord treating you these
days?
MARCUS
It‟s fine, no problems.
MARCUS‟ DAD
Good, those Japanese sure do know how to
make quality cars. They‟re kicking the
holy hell out of us Americans, we should
take notice and learn from them.
WEATHERMAN
Good morning folks and happy Friday!
And it‟ll be a happy Friday indeed with
unseasonably warm temperatures today.
Highs of 82 inland and 76 at the beaches,
that‟s right 82! And it‟s only early
June! It‟ll truly be a picture perfect
day today with massive sunshine and not
a cloud in the sky. You might want to
consider playing hooky from work if you
can and start your weekend early. Maybe
even sneak off to the beach for awhile.
The Chamber of Commerce loves days like
this.
MARCUS
I gotta run and get ready for school.
MARCUS‟ BEDROOM
MARCUS
(quietly to himself)
82 degrees today? 82 degrees! And people
expect me to go to school? I‟m a high
school senior, exams are next week, I‟m
going to college and I have nothing to
do today. Heck, even the weatherman
told me to go to the beach.
(pause)
There‟s only one thing to do today.
(devilish smile)
Ditch.
Marcus sits down on his bed and grabs the phone from his
end table to make a call.
MARCUS
Yo Johnny, it‟s Marcus. You heard the
weather report today right?
(listens to his friend
on the other end)
Let‟s party. We‟re skipping class and
going down to the beach.
(listens to his friend
on the other end)
You know it. Call the gang, I‟ll call
Stacey. Let‟s meet in the school parking
lot.
(listens to his friend
on the other end)
Yeah don‟t worry, the teachers won‟t see
us, they‟re in the other lot. The school‟s
a good meeting place. Be there in 15
minutes alright? Oh and bring beach
blankets.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 7
MARCUS
Super Nintendo, Sega Genesis, when I was
dead broke man I couldn‟t picture this…
MARCUS
Vincent.
VINCENT
What‟s up Marcus?
MARCUS
Get in, we‟re ditching.
VINCENT
I can‟t, I got to make it to my English
class today, one more absence and I might
get detention.
MARCUS
Come on, it‟s the end of the year, you
won‟t get detention. We‟re heading down
to the beach.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 8
VINCENT
I wish I can, but I can‟t.
(thinking)
Who‟s we?
MARCUS
Me, Johnny, Stacey, a few of the other
guys…Karen, Jodi, Sandy…
VINCENT
(interrupts)
Wait, Karen‟s going?
MARCUS
Yeah…oh wait, I forgot, you have a thing
for Karen, don‟t you?
VINCENT
If “having a thing” means being in love
with someone since sophomore year than
yeah I guess you could say I have a thing
for her.
MARCUS
Well we are going to the beach so I‟m sure
she‟ll be in a bathing suit, probably even
a two piece. But whatever, next time.
Enjoy Mrs. Marconi‟s English class.
Marcus revs his engine and prepares to peel out but Vincent
stops him.
VINCENT
OK, wait, wait! I‟m in.
MARCUS
I knew you‟d see things my way.
VINCENT
What the hell, I‟m pretty good at the
English language anyways. What about my
car?
MARCUS
Screw it, we‟ll pick it up later tonight.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 9
VINCENT
What now?
MARCUS
We wait. Everyone should be here in a
few minutes.
Marcus pops a tape into the car radio to play Snoop Doggy
Dogg‟s “What‟s My Name.”
STACEY
Hey babe.
MARCUS
Hey sweetheart.
STACEY
Ohh, hey Vincent.
VINCENT
(sheepishly)
Hi Stacey. Please don‟t let me dissuade
you from your make-out session.
STACEY
(looks at Marcus)
Nahhh, we‟re done.
MARCUS
(sadly)
We are?
STACEY
Yep.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 10
MARCUS
Alright, let‟s get out and stretch our
legs.
Marcus and Vincent get out of the car, Vincent walks over
to the driver‟s side and they both lean up against it as
they wait for the rest of their friends to show up.
STACEY
What a gorgeous day!
MARCUS
And you‟re a gorgeous girl. What a
great day to ditch!
Marcus puts Stacey back down on her feet, then she struts
around the length of his automobile.
STACEY
I can‟t wait to show off my new bathing
suit.
MARCUS
Oh yeah, it‟s nice?
STACEY
You bet your ass it is.
MARCUS
(shaking his head)
Friggin‟ Charlie O…how much sleep you
figure he got last night?
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 11
VINCENT
(laughs)
Two, three hours?
MARCUS
What a wastoid.
VINCENT
Yeah, but he‟s our wastoid.
MARCUS
(shouts out)
Charlie O you drunk!
CHARLIE O
Hey, I‟m not drunk yet, just high.
MARCUS
Where‟d you get the bottle from?
CHARLIE O
(looks inquisitively at
his bottle)
What, this? This is my stash from last
night. No, I‟m fine right now…at least
for the time being. Do you want some?
MARCUS
Aww, damn Charlie get that away from me.
It‟s too early.
CHARLIE O
Too early?
MARCUS
(looks at his watch)
Yeah, it‟s 7:45 in the morning.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 12
CHARLIE O
It‟s not early if you haven‟t gone to
bed yet.
MARCUS
And you‟re proud of that?
CHARLIE O
Damn right. So are you sure you don‟t
want any?
MARCUS
Yeah, I‟m good.
CHARLIE O
OK, suit yourself.
MARCUS
(looks back at Vincent)
Note to self, Charlie O is not driving
down to the beach.
VINCENT
You got that right.
STACEY
Oh jeez, Robbie and Jodi are fighting.
MARCUS
Again? God do they ever stop?
VINCENT
(rolls his eyes)
This should make for a fun time.
MARCUS
Hey, be positive.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 13
ROBERT
When I say I‟m going to pick you up at
7:30, I mean 7:30. Not 7:32, not 7:35;
7:30!
JODI
I‟m sorry, I was having a bad hair day.
ROBERT
Your hair looks fine.
JODI
No it doesn‟t, it looks like hell. But,
I wasn‟t that late though.
ROBERT
It doesn‟t matter if you were only five
minutes late, it‟s the principle. It‟s
always about you. You‟re such a selfish
bitch sometimes.
Marcus and the rest of the group is shocked when they hear
Robert drop the “bitch” word so they awkwardly look away
from them.
ROBERT
Hey Marcus, what‟s going on bro?
MARCUS
Heeey Robbie.
ROBERT
(looks at Stacey)
Hey Stace, how‟s it going?
Stacey isn‟t too happy that he just cursed out her friend
and it shows.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 14
STACEY
(flippantly)
Hey Robbie.
STACEY
Hey honey, how are you?!?
JODI
I‟m good. You look beautiful today.
STACEY
Awww, thanks, I love you.
MARCUS
Hey, look who it is!
MARCUS
(whispers)
It‟s the girl of your dreams Vinny.
VINCENT
(annoyingly)
Stop.
STACEY
It‟s Karen and Sandy! How you doing
girls!?!
Karen and Sandy get settled within the group. Karen stands
next to Vincent, who becomes visibly nervous to be so close
to her because he likes her so much.
KAREN
Hey Vincent, how‟s it going?
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 15
VINCENT
(awkwardly)
Ohh, I‟m a, fine.
KAREN
Are you OK?
VINCENT
Yeah, yeah…why do you ask?
KAREN
I don‟t know, you seem a little weird.
VINCENT
Oh no, I‟m OK. Probably just a little
tired.
KAREN
Are you excited for today?
VINCENT
Yeah, should be fun.
KAREN
Vinny, relax! What‟s wrong with you?!?
Are you afraid that we‟re going to be
caught for ditching?
VINCENT
Yeah that must be it.
KAREN
Well don‟t worry, we‟re going to have
so much fun today that you‟re going
to forget about school and teachers
and homework and North Providence High.
Karen gives Vincent a big hug that makes him melt and puts
a big smile on his face.
Another car pulls into the parking lot about thirty yards
down away from them. JOHNNY gets out, opens up the back
door and grabs two grocery bags filled to the top with
snacks.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 16
MARCUS
Johnny!
ROBERT
Look at this guy, the only one to think
to bring groceries.
JOHNNY
You know it! I guess I‟m the only
forward-thinking prick here.
MARCUS
And we thank you for being a prick.
JOHNNY
Sorry for being late kids, but as you
can see I decided to take a trip to the
Stop-N-Shop for some goodies.
Charlie O puts his face into one of the grocery bags and
starts rifling around inside it.
CHARLIE O
What do you got in here? I‟m hungry.
JOHNNY
You got the munchies, man?
CHARLIE O
(laughs)
Ha, ha you know it.
JOHNNY
I got chips, I got dips, I got some cold
cuts, potato salad, some pizza strips.
I got a lot.
STACEY
Ahhhh, pizza strips, sweet!
CHARLIE O
Mmmm, tortilla chips, yummy.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 17
SANDY
Ewww, gross.
ROBERT
Hey Charlie O, save some for the rest
of us.
MARCUS
Damn, you went all out Johnny.
JOHNNY
Hey this is the last time we‟re going
to ditch, we have to make it memorable,
right?
MARCUS
(shakes his head)
Ain‟t that the truth.
MARCUS
OK, so we have everybody? It looks like
we do. Let‟s get going and hit the
beach!
STACEY
Who‟s driving?
MARCUS
I‟ll drive one car. Who‟s with me?
STACEY
You know I‟ll always be your plus one.
ROBERT
I‟ll drive too with Jodi…anyone else
is welcomed.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 18
KAREN
(whispers to Vincent)
No thank you. Those two always fight.
I don‟t want to deal with that all the
way down to the beach.
VINCENT
I know.
ROBERT
Anyone else want to go with us?
ROBERT
Anyone else? Come on, guys, why doesn‟t
anyone want to ride with us?
JOHNNY
Oh what the hell, I‟ll ride with you all.
Johnny picks up his two grocery bags and carries them over
to Robert‟s trunk.
CHARLIE O
(confused)
Heeey, where you going with the snacks?
JOHNNY
Don‟t worry, you can grab them at the
beach…and clean up your face, will you?
MARCUS
We need another driver? Who wants to
Drive?
VINCENT
I‟ll drive.
MARCUS
You sure?
VINCENT
Yeah, I‟ll drive. No problem.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 19
MARCUS
OK, cool. We got our three drivers.
CHARLIE O
Vinny, I‟ll ride with you.
VINCENT
(mockingly)
Ohhh, great.
(nervously)
Hey Karen, would you like to ride with
me?
KAREN
Sure.
VINCENT
Great, let‟s go.
MARCUS
(looks at Sandy)
Well Sandy, it looks like it‟s you, me
and Stacey.
SANDY
Cool. Thank god I get to go in the
“normal” car, no Charlie and no Robbie
and Jodi.
MARCUS
Yeah, sorry that me and Stacey are so
boring.
VINCENT
(looks at Charlie O)
Charlie O, let‟s get your drunk ass
moving.
Once they get close Charlie O breaks out into a sprint and
runs over to the car, touching its‟ side.
CHARLIE O
(shouts)
Shotgun!
VINCENT
Ahhh, no way buddy. Karen‟s getting shot-
gun.
CHARLIE O
That‟s not fair! I called it! And I was
the first one to touch the car.
VINCENT
That may be true but I‟m the driver and
the driver can overrule any shotgun calls…
and I‟m overruling this one.
CHARLIE O
(pouting)
Fine.
Just as Vincent gets into the car and starts it up, his
brother, JOEY, a small, scrawny freshman, walks past the
back of the car and notices Vincent and his friends.
JOEY
Vincent, what are you doing?
VINCENT
(perturbed)
Joey, what are you doing here? Shouldn‟t
you already be in homeroom?
JOEY
The bus showed up late.
VINCENT
That‟s too bad.
JOEY
That‟s why you should be driving me to
school.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 21
VINCENT
Sorry kid but I don‟t want to be seen
with you.
KAREN
Hey Vincent that‟s not nice.
VINCENT
I‟m just kidding.
Joey looks into the car and sees Karen and Charlie O who‟s
still drinking his bottle of Vodka in the backseat.
JOEY
Are you ditching school?
VINCENT
Maybe, so what‟s it to you?
JOEY
I want to go.
VINCENT
You can‟t.
JOEY
Why not?
VINCENT
Because this is a grown-ups trip and
you‟re too young.
JOEY
No I‟m not.
VINCENT
You‟re a freshman, yes you are.
KAREN
(smiling)
Ohh come on Vinny. He‟s cute! Let him
come!
VINCENT
(annoyed)
No.
JOEY
Yeah, listen to your sweet girlfriend.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 22
VINCENT
(getting even more annoyed)
She‟s not my girlfriend. And I said no.
JOEY
Come on, please.
VINCENT
No, you little squirt. How many times
do I have to tell you?
JOEY
I‟ll tell mom and dad.
VINCENT
You wouldn‟t…would you?
JOEY
Watch me.
VINCENT
Fine come on. But don‟t tell mom or
dad I let you ditch.
JOEY
(excitedly)
Oh boy!
VINCENT
Get in.
KAREN
(claps her hands)
This is great! Vincent, it‟s so sweet
that you‟re taking your little brother
with us.
VINCENT
It is?
KAREN
Yeah, it is.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 23
Karen runs her fingers quickly through his hair which puts
a big smile on his face.
Just as Joseph gets settled into the backseat and puts his
seatbelt on, Charlie O offers him some of his Vodka.
CHARLIE O
Hey kid, would you like a drink?
VINCENT
Charlie don‟t offer my fourteen year old
kid brother any alcohol please.
CHARLIE O
OK, I don‟t know what the big deal is
though.
VINCENT
Because he‟s fourteen years old!
CHARLIE O
Whatever.
(leans over and whispers to
Joey)
Hey, if you need a drink during the ride
just give me a little elbow nudge and
I‟ll hook you up.
VINCENT
Ahhh, I might as well hang up this air
freshener. You got to figure that
(MORE)
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 24
VINCENT (cont‟d)
Charlie O is going to start smelling
somewhere around the Warwick / East
Greenwich border.
CHARLIE O
I resent that, I took a shower on
Tuesday.
VINCENT
Great, too bad it‟s Friday now.
CHARLIE O
It is? Hmmm, I thought it was only
Thursday.
VINCENT
Ahhh, nope.
MARCUS
(shouts)
Stan…
MARCUS
Stanley.
JOHNNY
Marcus, come on.
MARCUS
No, I‟m not joking around.
(looks back at Stan)
Stan, come over here.
MARCUS
(laughs)
Yeah you. Come on over.
STANLEY
(nervously)
Hey Marcus, what‟s going on?
MARCUS
Not much. We‟re ditching today, going
down to the beach. You interested?
STANLEY
(surprisingly)
Really?!?! Me?
MARCUS
Yeah.
STANLEY
Why are you asking me?
MARCUS
Because you‟re a good kid…and you let
me cheat off of you in math class. I
owe you.
MARCUS (cont‟d)
Look we‟re seniors, we‟re graduating next
week. Come with us, blow off some steam.
MARCUS (cont‟d)
(smiles)
Come on. You know you want to.
STANLEY
I don‟t know. Is this some kind of joke?
I‟ve never hung out with you guys before.
I‟m afraid you‟re going to pick on me.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 26
MARCUS
Have I ever picked on you before?
STANLEY
No.
MARCUS
So come on. What do you have to lose?
STANLEY
Nothing, I guess.
(shakes his head
enthusiastically)
OK!
MARCUS
Good man…get in.
JOHNNY
You serious about this?
MARCUS
(innocently)
Well yeah. I‟ve always had a soft spot
for the kid. Let‟s show him some fun
and he can see how the other half lives.
STANLEY
My notebook!
MARCUS
Don‟t worry, you won‟t need it where
we‟re going.
STANLEY
But…
MARCUS
(interrupts)
Stanley, if you‟re going to hang out
(MORE)
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 27
MARCUS (cont‟d)
with us, you‟re going to have to be
chill.
STANLEY
OK, I understand. It was only my gym
class notebook anyways.
SANDY
You take notes for gym?
STANLEY
Yeah, don‟t you?
SANDY
(quietly to herself)
Dork.
Marcus looks around and sees that everyone has loaded into
his and Robert‟s cars.
MARCUS
Looks like we‟re all ready. Let‟s roll!
VINCENT
(shouts out)
Let‟s go to the beach!
All three cars pull out of their spots and head out of the
parking lot as the school bell, signifying the start to the
day, RINGS in the background.
The three cars cruise along I-95, past the Rhode Island
State House and through the heart of the city.
IN MARCUS‟ CAR
Marcus puts his hand out the window while driving to feel
the wind passing by.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 28
MARCUS
Ahhh, feel the breeze!
STACEY
Cigarette?
MARCUS
Don‟t mind if I do.
MARCUS
(frustrated)
Damn it.
Finally, Stacey has had enough and takes it from his mouth.
STACEY
Here, let me do it.
MARCUS
God I feel so emasculated.
STACEY
That‟s OK honey, not everyone can do
two things at once.
Marcus takes a long drag from his cigarette and blows the
smoke out of the window.
STACEY
Sandy, would you like one?
SANDY
Sure.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 29
STANLEY
(innocently)
You know they say that smoking causes
cancer.
MARCUS
(coolly)
Is that right?
STANLEY
Yeah, I read an article about it in
Time magazine a few weeks ago.
MARCUS
That might be so, but I do feel damn
cool doing it.
SANDY
You read Time Magazine?
STANLEY
(confused)
Yeah, don‟t you?
SANDY
No.
STANLEY
Well then how do you get your news?
How do you keep up with things?
SANDY
I don‟t because I don‟t care.
STANLEY
Why not? Don‟t you want to know what‟s
going on in the world?
SANDY
My world is in the three cars heading to
the beach right now.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 30
STANLEY
(confused)
I don‟t get it.
SANDY
(condescendingly)
I didn‟t think you would.
STANLEY
I sense some hostility towards me.
SANDY
(laughs dismissively)
No, none at all.
STACEY
I can‟t believe how nice it is today, I
don‟t see one cloud in the sky. Do you
know we‟d be in Mrs. Marconi‟s English
class right now?
MARCUS
We would be, but thankfully we‟re not.
STACEY
That‟s right, we‟re ditching.
MARCUS
How about you Stanley?
STANLEY
What?
MARCUS
Have you ever ditched?
STANLEY
You mean cut school?
MARCUS
(laughs)
Yes, I mean cut school.
STANLEY
No. I‟ve never done anything like this.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 31
SANDY
Have you ever even gotten detention
before?
STANLEY
Ohh god no. My parents would kill me if
I ever had to stay after school.
MARCUS
You come from a strict home?
STANLEY
Yes, it‟s all about education, studying
and academics. No time for horseplay.
MARCUS
That‟s sad. There‟s more to life than
books. I have my issues with my parents
but I‟ll give them credit for at least
understanding that.
STACEY
Don‟t you ever want to just let loose
and go crazy?
STANLEY
No, not really.
MARCUS
Well Stanley, my friend, there‟s a first
time for everything. Prepared to get
crazy.
IN ROBERT‟S CAR
Even before anyone says anything in the car, you can cut
the tension with a knife.
JODI
You missed the exit.
ROBERT
I didn‟t miss the exit.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 32
JODI
Yes, you did, right there, you missed
the exit.
JODI (cont‟d)
That leads to the beach.
ROBERT
No it doesn‟t.
JODI
Yes it does!
ROBERT
The exit, the highway, it‟s up ahead.
JODI
No it‟s not.
ROBERT
Yes it is, it‟s about a half mile up.
JODI
You‟re an idiot.
ROBERT
I‟m an idiot!?! You‟re an idiot.
JODI
No, you‟re an idiot.
ROBERT
You are. Here I‟ll prove it.
(looks at Johnny)
Johnny, where‟s the highway exit?
JOHNNY
Whoa, whoa, whoa, don‟t get me involved
in this!
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 33
ROBERT
Come on, tell us. I‟m just trying to
get our asses to the beach…and shut Jodi
up in the process.
JOHNNY
Fine, Jodi was right. The exit was back
there.
ROBERT
Fuck you.
JOHNNY
See, this is why I didn‟t want to say
anything.
ROBERT
You can go fuck yourself too.
IN VINCENT‟S CAR
JOEY
Can we stop off and get some Cheetos?
CHARLIE O
Mmmm, yeah, let‟s get Cheetos.
VINCENT
(annoyed)
No, we‟re not going to get Cheetos.
CHARLIE O
What about Doritos?
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 34
VINCENT
No!
JOEY
Why not?
VINCENT
Because Johnny already bought a bunch
of snacks.
JOEY
Yeah, but he‟s in another car.
CHARLIE O
That‟s true Vinny, he is in another car.
VINCENT
Look, we‟re on the highway, we‟re not
going to pull off just to find a Stop
N Shop. Can‟t you wait just 20 more
minutes!?!
Karen yells out when she sees them heading towards another
car.
KAREN
Vincent, watch out!
VINCENT
Damn! Sorry guy.
CHARLIE O
(laughs)
Yo, man. That was close!
VINCENT
Everyone just shut up for the rest of
the ride.
CHARLIE O
But, dude…
VINCENT
(interrupts)
Shut up…everyone.
KAREN
Even me?
VINCENT
(smiles)
No, you can still talk to me…just don‟t
talk to them.
ROBERT
We are so behind the other guys.
JODI
Are we lost again?
ROBERT
No we‟re not lost. And what do you mean,
again? When were we lost before?
JODI
Ummm, back on the highway when you missed
the exit.
ROBERT
We weren‟t lost then, I just missed the
turn.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 36
JODI
OK, fine. But we‟re lost now.
ROBERT
We‟re not lost.
JODI
Where‟s the beach then? I don‟t see the
beach yet. We should see it by now.
ROBERT
We‟re almost there.
JODI
Are we? Are we?
JOHNNY
Robbie, make yourself useful and pull
into that packie store up ahead.
ROBERT
(doubtingly)
You going to buy beer?
JOHNNY
Yes, I‟m going to buy beer.
ROBERT
With what?
JOHNNY
Ohh I don‟t know…
JOHNNY (cont‟d)
…My brother‟s fake ID.
JODI
Sweet!
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 37
ROBERT
What, you couldn‟t even take your brother‟s
real ID, you had to settle for his fake
ID?
JOHNNY
Yeah, there was no way he was going to
give me his real ID. Besides, it‟s
not like he needs this anymore.
ROBERT
Let me see this thing.
ROBERT
It says you‟re 26.
JOHNNY
Yeah.
ROBERT
You don‟t look like your 26.
JOHNNY
So, it‟s what a government document says
I am, so that‟s what I am.
ROBERT
But this isn‟t a government document, it‟s
a fake.
JOHNNY
They won‟t know that though. To them,
it‟s be real.
ROBERT
Ohhhkay…good luck with this.
JOHNNY
It‟s better than nothing…and it‟s better
than your fake ID.
ROBERT
I don‟t have a fake ID.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 38
JOHNNY
Exactly.
ROBERT
I still have my doubts about that ID.
JOHNNY
OK fine, we‟ll just sit around drinking
pink Lemonade and cokes like a bunch of
junior high kids. Robbie, bro, we‟re
almost in college. We have to start
acting like collegians. I‟m buying beer.
ROBERT
Whatever, I‟ll be fine with my protein
shakes.
JOHNNY
(quietly)
Meathead.
ROBERT
What?
JOHNNY
Nothing.
ROBERT
Alright, let‟s go in.
JOHNNY
Not so fast Robbie.
ROBERT
What? Why?
JOHNNY
The clerk sees three underaged kids go
into his store he might think we‟re up
to something no good. There‟s more of
a chance that he won‟t sell to me.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 39
ROBERT
OK fine. We‟ll wait in the car.
JOHNNY
Well you can wait in the car and Jodi and
I will go in.
ROBERT
(jealously)
Why is Jodi going to go in with you?
JOHNNY
Because this clerk is probably a middle-
aged hornball. Maybe even divorced, but
definitely a guy that‟s hard up for some
female attention. Jodi your role is to
use your sensuality to divert attention
from my shitty fake ID. Do you think
you can do that?
ROBERT
Hold it! Hold it! Hold it!
JODI
(ignoring Robert‟s objections)
Of course I can do that!
JOHNNY
Awesome. Let‟s go.
ROBERT
Johnny, I don‟t like you using my girl-
friend like a sex object.
JOHNNY
Why? That‟s your job?
ROBERT
No, but…
JOHNNY
(interrupts)
Relax, it‟s all in the name of beer.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 40
ROBERT
Fine. Well be cool in there and behave.
JOHNNY
Just keep the car warm, OK?
Johnny and Jodi get out and walk towards the liquor store
while Robert stays in the car, pissed off and jealous.
JODI
What are you doing?
JOHNNY
Here, take this.
JODI
And do what with it?
JOHNNY
When we get up to the cash register I
want you to rub this ice cube on your
neck and your upper chest area, letting
it melt and allowing the water to run
down your chest and into your cleavage.
JODI
(laughs)
You‟re crazy.
JOHNNY
Crazy like a fox.
JODI
That‟s so stupid though, it‟ll never
work.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 41
JOHNNY
It will work, trust me.
JODI
I don‟t know.
JOHNNY
Come on, you‟re hot…and look at that
clerk, he looks like he hasn‟t talked to
a girl in 10 years.
JODI
(smiles)
Wait, I‟m hot?
JOHNNY
Of course you are.
JODI
Thanks. I just wish Robbie would say
things like that to me everyone once in
a while.
JOHNNY
Oh boy, let‟s not get into this. Come
on, focus.
JODI
OK, OK, sorry.
JOHNNY
Alright, let me grab a couple of bags
of ice.
Johnny reaches back into the freezer and grabs two bags of
ice.
JODI
Do you need any help.
JOHNNY
Nope, I‟m good. You just hold onto your
ice cube.
JODI
I think I can do that.
JOHNNY
Good, let‟s grab the beer now.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 42
JOHNNY
Hmmm, what to get, what to get. Miller
Lite…Coors…Bud…Natty Lite.
All the while, Jodi is still holding onto the ice cube
which is freezing up her hands as she constantly moves it
from one to the other.
JODI
Mmmm, Johnny.
JOHNNY
Hold on, I‟m trying to figure this out.
JODI
Johnny, my hand is freezing! Make a
selection now and let‟s go!
JOHNNY
Ohhh damn, I forgot you were still holding
the ice cube.
JOHNNY (cont‟d)
OK, a case of Busch and a case of Busch
Light. Done. Do we need anything else?
JODI
I think we should get some Zima for the
girls.
JOHNNY
Ohhh, good idea. But let‟s just clarify,
the Zima won‟t just be for the ladies,
it‟s good stuff, I‟m sure us guys will
enjoy having some too.
(pause)
Do you mind grabbing it though? My
hands are full.
JODI
Sure.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 43
Johnny puts the two cases on the counter and grabs the
Zimas from Jodi.
JOHNNY
How are you doing today sir?
JOHNNY
Oh sure, sure.
As Johnny reaches into his pocket to grab his fake ID, Jodi
starts rubbing the ice cube around her neck and upper chest
in short circles, letting the water run down into her
cleavage.
JODI
Ohh man, it‟s so hot out there, I need
to cool off.
JOHNNY
Ahhh, here it is, I found it. Sorry,
it was stuck in my wallet.
JODI
I can‟t wait to hit the beach. Johhny,
how do you like my bikini top?
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 44
JOHNNY
It‟s nice.
JODI
It‟s not too small is it?
JOHNNY
(laughs)
Nah, it‟s just the right size.
JODI
Good. I was worried that my breasts were
too big for this top and they‟d be popping
out all day long.
JOHNNY
Nope, nope, I think you‟ll be fine.
With her shirt unbuttoned, Jodi rubs the ice cube directly
in her cleavage.
JODI (cont‟d)
God, it really is so hot out. I‟m so
happy I‟m only minutes away from running
around the beach in my skimpy bikini.
JOHNNY
Very good sir. Here you go.
Johnny grabs the cases from the counter while Jodi takes
the 6-packs of Zima.
JODI
See you later hot stuff.
JOHNNY
That was some nice adlibbing there.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 45
JODI
What can I say, I‟m good.
ROBERT
What took you guys so long?
JOHNNY
Ohh nothing, just took some time to pick
out the beer.
ROBERT
It took you that long to pick out Busch
beer?
JOHNNY
Yeah, I guess.
ROBERT
And what‟s so funny anyways?
JOHNNY
Ohh nothing.
ROBERT
Nothing? It sure does seem like you guys
are like best friends now.
JODI
Robbie relax, it was nothing, Johnny just
made a joke.
ROBERT
What‟s your shirt doing unbuttoned?
JOHNNY
Robbie, just drive. Let‟s catch up to the
others, they‟re probably already at the
beach now.
Marcus‟ and Vincent‟s cars roll slowly down the busy road
as Coolio‟s “Fantastic Voyage” plays.
PARKING LOT
They pull into the large, crowded parking lot and park in
two spots next to each other.
All of the occupants of the two cars get out and stretch.
SANDY
Where‟s Robbie and them all? Did any-
one see what happened to them?
KAREN
Yeah, they were up ahead of us on the
highway but they missed the exit so
I‟m sure they had to turn around or
something.
SANDY
Did anyone beep them to see where they
are?
MARCUS
Robbie is a grown up, we‟ve been to this
beach a thousand times, he‟ll find his
way.
STACEY
I‟m sure he blamed Jodi for missing the
exit.
MARCUS
Come on, be nice.
STACEY
You know he will though.
MARCUS
You‟re probably right, but what can we
do?
Vincent walks over to Marcus‟ car and helps him unpack it.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 47
VINCENT
I feel bad for Johnny though, being stuck
with them for the whole ride. Talk about
awkward.
MARCUS
(whispers)
I know, we should‟ve had Charlie O ride
with them, my boy Johnny didn‟t deserve
that.
CHARLIE O
I feel bad for all of us since Johnny has
the snacks and I‟m hungry.
JOEY
Me too.
VINCENT
I‟m sure they‟ll be here any minute now.
MARCUS
OK, looks like we‟ve got everything.
Everyone take a few things.
MARCUS
Charlie O, you might want to put that
bottle in a bag or something so that
you don‟t get busted.
CHARLIE O
Good point, but I don‟t have anything.
VINCENT
I think I have a grocery bag in my car
that can help.
Vincent walks over and grabs a brown paper grocery bag from
his trunk.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 48
MARCUS
We ready now?
STACEY
Yeah.
MARCUS
Alright, let‟s rock the beach!
VINCENT
Charlie O, don‟t you think you should
hold off on drinking your Vodka until
we hit the beach?
CHARLIE O
Why?
VINCENT
Ohhh I don‟t know, because this parking
lot is probably loaded with cops.
CHARLIE O
So? I have my stuff in a brown bag.
They‟ll never know.
VINCENT
Yeah, because no one‟s ever drank booze
from a brown bag before. You‟re such
a trendsetter.
CHARLIE O
All I know is that they‟ll need a warrant
if they want to search my paper bag.
VINCENT
Or just smell your breath, it‟s called
probable cause dickhead.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 49
CHARLIE 0
Hey there‟s no need for name calling.
I‟m a sensitive soul.
VINCENT
Whatever dude.
MARCUS
Come on Charlie O put the bottle away
until we hit the beach. We‟re almost
there.
CHARLIE O
OK fine. But I‟m only doing this because
Vinny was nice enough to give me a ride
down here. Thanks Vinny.
VINCENT
Yeah, no problem.
THE BEACH
MARCUS
This is it, this is our spot. Right
in the middle of the action.
STACEY
I like it.
MARCUS
OK, let‟s set up shop here.
Marcus lays his big beach blanket down while the others set
down the stuff that they‟re carrying.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 50
MARCUS
Stacey, help me the blanket, we need to
weigh it down.
STACEY
Sure.
Marcus and Stacey sit down on the blanket and take their
sneakers off. They place them on the four corners of the
blanket to weigh it down so that the wind doesn‟t blow it
around anymore.
STACEY
I might as well jump into it and work
on my tan right away.
KAREN
Good idea.
VINCENT
Owww.
MARCUS
Snap out of it.
VINCENT
What did you do that for?
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 51
MARCUS
Careful Vinny, I was afraid that you were
going to burn a hole right through Karen
with your stare.
VINCENT
I don‟t know what you‟re talking about
Marcus.
MARCUS
Sure, right.
VINCENT
Hey Karen, can I help you put on some
suntan lotion.
KAREN
Sure…you‟re so nice.
VINCENT
Hey, I‟m just trying to help.
MARCUS
He‟s not the smoothest guy in the world.
STACEY
No he‟s not, but it‟s cute anyways.
MARCUS
Do you think Karen knows he‟s in love
with her?
STACEY
I don‟t think so.
MARCUS
Really, it seems pretty obvious to me.
STACEY
That‟s probably because you know for a
fact that he‟s in love with her.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 52
MARCUS
Maybe so. Do you think Karen likes him?
STACEY
I don‟t know.
MARCUS
You don‟t know? Come on, you‟re girls,
you talk all the time. You mean to tell
me after all the slumber parties you
girls have had and all the times you‟ve
had your idle chatter in the locker room
after gym class, you have no idea if
Karen likes Vincent?
STACEY
Honestly I don‟t know.
MARCUS
OK, maybe you don‟t know for a fact, but
what do you think? Do YOU think she
likes him?
STACEY
Hmmm, tough to tell. I wouldn‟t doubt
that she likes him, but I also wouldn‟t
doubt that she doesn‟t know it yet.
MARCUS
Interesting, that‟s deep.
VINCENT
(timidly)
OK, I think I‟m done. Hopefully I didn‟t
miss any spots, I‟d hate for you to end
up with a splotchy tan.
KAREN
I‟m sure it‟s fine. You did a great job!
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 53
Karen gives him a playful kiss on the cheek then runs off
to the water with Sandy.
VINCENT
(to himself)
She kissed me, she kissed my cheek, she
really kissed me.
MARCUS
Hey killer.
VINCENT
Marcus, she kissed my cheek.
MARCUS
I know, I saw.
VINCENT
I‟m in love.
MARCUS
That‟s great, now can I get the suntan
lotion? Some other people around here
want to use it.
VINCENT
Sure, here you go.
MARCUS
Thank you.
Robert and Jodi walk across the beach heading towards the
beach blanket area. Robert is carrying a cooler of beer
while Johnny trails not that far behind them, carrying the
two bags of groceries that he brought with him.
ROBERT
Will you hurry up!
JODI
I‟m trying, I‟m going as fast as I can.
ROBERT
Well go faster.
JODI
I would if I wasn‟t so exhausted.
Seriously, could you have parked any
further away?
ROBERT
It was the best spot I could find.
JODI
No it wasn‟t, we walked by at least
four empty spaces on our way here.
ROBERT
Well I didn‟t see them when I was looking
for a spot.
JODI
Maybe you should‟ve looked harder instead
of concentrating on fixing your hair in
the rear view mirror.
ROBERT
Jodi, I have to make sure my hair looks
good.
JODI
For what? We‟re at the beach! It‟s
windy out here, hell you‟re hair already
looks like shit.
ROBERT
Stop it.
ROBERT
Hey guys.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 55
CHARLIE O
Yo Robbie.
Johnny sets his grocery bags down on the blanket and walks
over to Marcus.
MARCUS
So how was the ride down?
JOHNNY
Ridiculous.
MARCUS
Sorry about that.
JOHNNY
They don‟t ever stop. Ever.
MARCUS
Yeah, it‟s really insane, isn‟t it?
JOHNNY
What‟s more insane is that they‟ll
probably end up getting married one day.
MARCUS
I already feel bad for their kids.
JOHNNY
Tell me about it.
MARCUS
So at what point did you regret
volunteering to ride with them?
JOHNNY
Pretty much when Robert turned on the
ignition.
MARCUS
(laughs)
That‟s funny.
JOHNNY
Or sad.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 56
MARCUS
So what‟s in the cooler?
JOHNNY
Ahhh, glad you asked. We stopped off
and grabbed some beer.
MARCUS
How did you score that?
JOHNNY
My brother‟s fake ID.
MARCUS
Sweet, I sure do like your brother.
JOHNNY
Yeah, he‟s a good dude. So dig in guys.
MARCUS
Just make sure you all put your beer in
a plastic cup…there are open container
laws around here you know.
STACEY
Not to mention we‟re all under age.
MARCUS
Yeah that too I guess.
Joey walks over and peeks his head into the cooler.
JOEY
Can I have a beer?
VINCENT
No!
JOEY
Why not? Everyone else is drinking!
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 57
VINCENT
You‟re too young.
JOEY
So are you!
VINCENT
(thinking)
That may be right. But I‟m closer to
drinking age than you are.
JOEY
So? What does that mean?
VINCENT
It means that I‟m more experienced than
you are and I can handle my shit. You
can‟t.
JOEY
You don‟t know that.
VINCENT
Yes I do, I‟ve been there before, I
know what can happen.
JOEY
I‟ve drank before.
VINCENT
What? A glass of wine at grandma‟s
house for Sunday dinner?
JOEY
Yeah, maybe.
VINCENT
That doesn‟t count. Look, you‟re not
drinking a beer. Our parents are
already going to kill me if they knew
I let you ditch, they‟ll cut off my
balls if they find out I let you ditch
and I allowed you to get wasted. No
way I‟ll let you do that, I like my
balls.
JOEY
(pouting)
Fine.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 58
MARCUS
It‟s tough being his age.
VINCENT
I know, we were just there a few years
ago. I don‟t envy him.
MARCUS
That‟s OK. He may be a brat now, but
he‟s a cool kid. He‟ll be fine.
CHARLIE O
Yo, Marcus, check that out.
MARCUS
What?
MARCUS
Hey Stanley, do you think you have enough
suntan lotion on?
STANLEY
I don‟t know, I hope so.
CHARLIE O
Why did you put so much on?
STANLEY
I usually use 80 SPF but I couldn‟t find
any, I could only find this 20 SPF. So
I figured if I put on four layers, maybe
it‟ll have the same effect hopefully.
MARCUS
Stanley, come over here.
STANLEY
OK.
STANLEY
What‟s up Marcus?
MARCUS
You want a beer?
STANLEY
A beer? On the beach?
MARCUS
Yeah.
STANLEY
Isn‟t that illegal?
CHARLIE O
It certainly is.
STANLEY
I don‟t know if I should break the law.
MARCUS
Come on, it‟s OK. We‟re all having one
and just kicking back.
SANDY
Have you ever drank a beer? I‟m assuming
not since you‟ve never even smoked a
cigarette before.
STANLEY
That‟s correct, I never have.
SANDY
(rolls her eyes)
Shocking.
MARCUS
Look Stanley, I‟m not into peer pressure.
(MORE)
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 60
MARCUS (cont‟d)
If you want a beer, cool, they‟re in this
cooler over here, if not that‟s cool too…
more for us.
STANLEY
OK, maybe I‟ll have one later.
MARCUS
Cool, that‟s fine.
STACEY
Hey, why don‟t we hear some tunes!
JOHNNY
Good idea, let‟s throw on the radio.
CHARLIE O
Did anyone bring any Grateful Dead tapes?
I think some Dead would be cool right
about now.
MARCUS
No Charlie, I don‟t think we have any
Grateful Dead music with us.
CHARLIE O
You‟d all be so much cooler if you did
though.
Johnny sits down on the blanket and tinkers with the radio.
He moves the dial until he finds a hip-hop / rap radio
station.
JOHNNY
OK, I think I found 96.5 Jamz.
VINCENT
This Montell Jordan guy is going to be
a legend. His song here is totally
awesome.
JOHNNY
Totally agree, his voice is so silky
(MORE)
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 61
JOHNNY (cont‟d)
smooth. I know music, and this guy is
a musician. He‟s going to have a long
career.
MARCUS
Hey guys, why don‟t we all grab a beer
and have a cheers?
STANLEY
Do you have a Coke or something like that?
MARCUS
We got water, we didn‟t think too much
about bringing non-alcoholic drinks.
JOHNNY
Stanley while you‟re in there can you
grab me a beer?
STACEY
Yeah, me too, I‟ll take a light beer.
JODI
And me, I‟ll take a light too.
CHARLIE O
I‟ll take one of those bad boys too, I
guess I can deal with moving off of vodka
for a little bit.
MARCUS
OK, put your cans in the air.
MARCUS
To graduation…
JOHNNY
…And to new beginnings.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 62
STACEY
…And to high school memories.
KAREN
…And to the future, both college and
beyond.
CHARLIE O
…And to alcohol.
MARCUS
A toast…To some of the best friends a
guy can have.
EVERYONE
Here, here.
Everyone else notices him doing this once he‟s almost done.
ROBERT
Wow look at Charlie go.
VINCENT
Do you think it‟s safe to let him go
over to the water in his state?
MARCUS
Probably not, but who‟s going to stop him?
VINCENT
Not me.
MARCUS
Me neither, anyways he‟ll be fine, it‟s
not like he‟s a complete idiot. He‟s
actually got quite a brain behind all
his drug and alcohol abuse.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 63
SANDY
You know, you‟re quite a peculiar guy.
STANLEY
Thanks, I think.
SANDY
I didn‟t really mean that as a compliment.
STANLEY
Ohhh OK.
SANDY
Why are you so weird?
STANLEY
I don‟t know, I guess I never really
sat down and thought about it.
SANDY
Well maybe you should think about it so
you can change to fit in and be more like
us.
STANLEY
I‟m sorry that not everyone fits your
definition of cool. I am who I am and
I‟m OK with that. So if you don‟t mind
I‟d like to enjoy my bottle of water in
peace and without being made fun of.
MARCUS
Who wants to hit the water and cool down?
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 64
STACEY
I will.
JOHNNY
Me too.
MARCUS
Robbie, you in?
ROBERT
Nah, I was thinking about taking a walk
along the beach with Jodi.
JODI
You were? Thanks for letting me know
that.
ROBERT
Jodi, would you like to take a walk along
the beach with me?
JODI
Sure.
MARCUS
Suit yourself…but I‟m jumping in now.
ROBERT
OK, let‟s go Jodi.
Robert holds out his hand so that Jodi can grab it. Once
she does the two of them walk away towards the edge of the
water.
KAREN
I really don‟t know what she sees in him.
VINCENT
Hey!
KAREN
Vincent, I know he‟s your friend and
everything but I don‟t know how she puts
up with him, he‟s such a brute.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 65
KAREN
Your silence tells me everything I need
to know.
VINCENT
Karen.
KAREN
Yes?
VINCENT
Why don‟t we go stick our feet into the
water.
KAREN
Nice way to get out of this, change the
subject by tempting me with the ocean.
VINCENT
Whatever it takes.
KAREN
Do you mind if I hold your hand, I‟m
afraid I might fall down in the currents.
VINCENT
No, not at all. Go ahead, it‟s my
pleasure.
KAREN
Ohhh!
VINCENT
Don‟t worry, I got you.
JODI
What‟s going to happen to us?
ROBERT
What do you mean?
JODI
Well in only a couple months time I‟ll
be going off to college at Boston
University.
ROBERT
So? I‟ll be right down the road at
Rhode Island College. It‟s less than
an hour away.
JODI
I know.
ROBERT
So you know I‟ll be driving up there
every weekend, right?
JODI
I know. You do love me right?
ROBERT
What kind of question is that?
JODI
I don‟t know, I just want to make sure
you love me, I just want to make sure
that a long distance relationship
won‟t be a problem for us.
ROBERT
I really wish I was going to Boston
University, but it‟s not my fault that
I couldn‟t get in.
JODI
Well it kind of is.
ROBERT
What do you mean?
JODI
I don‟t know, maybe if you spent a little
(MORE)
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 67
JODI (cont‟d)
more time hitting the books and a little
less time at wrestling practice then
maybe you would‟ve had better grades.
ROBERT
Ohhh, don‟t start with me about this
again.
JODI
It‟s true though.
ROBERT
Are we going to fight again?
JODI
I don‟t want to fight, we always fight.
ROBERT
Well it sounds like you want to fight.
JODI
OK, OK, OK, we‟re getting off track.
ROBERT
You can say that again.
JODI
Look, regardless of everything, it is
what it is. I‟m going to Boston U and
you‟re going to RIC and I just want to
make sure that this thing, our thing,
will last because I don‟t want to lose
you.
ROBERT
I don‟t want to lose you either, you‟re
everything to me.
JODI
So do you love me?
ROBERT
Of course, forever.
JODI
And ever?
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 68
ROBERT
And ever.
JODI
(smiles)
Good because I love you too.
ROBERT
Forever?
JODI
And ever.
CHARLIE O
How‟s that water treating you?
JOEY
(disappointedly)
Fine.
CHARLIE O
OK kid, you ready to get drunk now?
JOEY
(perks up)
Seriously!?!
CHARLIE O
Yeah, your brother isn‟t around. I
think it‟s crucial for everyone to
learn how to drink at an early age,
it‟ll help them with their tolerance
later in life, which can only be a
good thing.
JOEY
What are we going to drink?
CHARLIE O
Vodka.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 69
JOEY
Oh boy, yes.
CHARLIE O
Calm down, not here. I don‟t want any-
one seeing us do this. Let‟s go to one
of the changing room before your brother
sees us.
CHARLIE O
OK, this looks good.
They go into the empty changing room and close the door
behind them.
CHARLIE O
You ready for this?
JOEY
I sure am.
CHARLIE O
Have a sip then, see what you‟ve been
missing out on for the first fourteen
years of your life.
CHARLIE O
Damn son, you must be thirsty.
CHARLIE O
You want a hit?
JOEY
Sure why not.
CHARLIE O
It looks like it‟s the only way I‟ll
get my bottle back.
CHARLIE O
(laughs)
Ha ha, takes a little bit of time to
get used to, doesn‟t it?
JOEY
Gimme the vodka back.
CHARLIE O
Atta boy!
CHARLIE O
Come on, let‟s get back before your
brother notices you‟re missing.
JOEY
Ahhh, don‟t worry about him, he‟s too
preoccupied with his secret crush.
CHARLIE O
Secret crush?
JOEY
Yeah, Karen.
CHARLIE O
Ahhh, that kinda makes sense.
JOEY
So he probably even forgot I‟m here.
CHARLIE O
Good point. Have another drink.
JOEY
Don‟t mind if I do.
Marcus and Stacey have their arms around each other while
they‟re waist deep in the ocean.
MARCUS
This is so nice.
STACEY
It is.
MARCUS
I‟m thirsty though. Are you thirsty?
STACEY
I could use a drink.
MARCUS
I‟ll grab one. What do you want?
STACEY
I think I saw some Zima in the cooler,
I‟ll take one of those.
MARCUS
Mmmm, sounds yummy. I think I‟ll grab
one of those for myself too.
STACEY
Hurry back though, the water gets cold
without your body heat.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 72
JOHNNY
Marcus, you want to toss the football
around?
MARCUS
Not right now. I gotta deliver a drink
to Stacey.
JOHNNY
Oh yeah, how‟s that going?
Marcus and Johnny look towards the water and see Stacey,
almost up to her neck now, waving at them. Marcus waves
back while Johnny politely raises his hand and acknowledges
her.
MARCUS
It‟s going good.
JOHNNY
So are you guys officially dating yet?
MARCUS
I don‟t think so.
JOHNNY
So what are you guys doing?
MARCUS
I don‟t know anymore, I just don‟t know.
JOHNNY
What do you mean you don‟t know?
MARCUS
Just like that, I don‟t know. I don‟t
know what goes through her mind sometimes.
I guess maybe we‟re just “hanging out”
at the moment, or something like that.
Here come, grab a beer and let‟s hit the
water.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 73
Johnny grabs a beer can from the cooler and then they both
walk towards the water.
JOHNNY
What are you waiting for then?
MARCUS
What do you mean?
JOHNNY
Well summertime‟s almost here, we graduate
in a week and we only have a couple months
left before most of us go our separate
ways. It‟s time to make your move
before you miss out.
MARCUS
I know.
JOHNNY
What I don‟t get is why you guys are still
in this gray area. You went to the prom
together just a couple weeks ago.
MARCUS
We went as friends though.
JOHNNY
OK, but you shared a bed later that night
at the Westin, in the room with Robbie and
Jodi.
MARCUS
True, but nothing happened.
JOHNNY
What? What? What? Nothing happened?!?
MARCUS
That‟s right.
JOHNNY
Marcus, we‟re not in fourth grade any-
more. It‟s OK to have sex with your
prom date.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 74
MARCUS
I know, but I don‟t want it to be just
wham bam thank you ma‟am. Stacey‟s
different. I want to take it slow, I
want to make sure she‟s cool with every-
thing.
JOHNNY
Ahhh that‟s so cute. You‟re in love.
MARCUS
Shut up and let‟s get in the water.
He gives her a Zima and in return she wraps her arms around
his neck and greets him with a kiss.
MARCUS
Wow, that was unexpected.
STACEY
Did you not enjoy it?
MARCUS
I loved it.
Marcus gives her a kiss back then they cheers with their
Zimas and take a sip from their bottles.
LATER ON - AFTERNOON
VINCENT
How about Johnny‟s outfit that night?
MARCUS
Ahhh man, I was trying so hard to forget
about that awful Z. Cavaricci suit he
wore to the prom.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 75
JOHNNY
What are you talking about? That suit
was fly!
VINCENT
That suit was decidedly not fly.
MARCUS
Z. Cavaricci makes for great pants, not
fly suits.
JOHNNY
Argh, you guys don‟t know anything about
fashion. That suit was so fashion forward
Europeans haven‟t even started wearing it
yet. But mark my word, they will be next
Spring.
MARCUS
Even Europeans aren‟t crazy enough to
wear that shit.
JOHNNY
OK, you just wait and see.
MARCUS
It was one thing to wear that marble-
colored monstrosity but to pair it with
a floral shirt and a string tie took
it to another level completely.
VINCENT
There are some things you wish you could
un-see in life, that was one of them.
JOHNNY
(frustrated)
String ties are the shit now! Again,
you guys don‟t know what you‟re talking
about. It‟s like I‟m Giorgio Armani
talking to two fashion designers from
Caldors. You guys aren‟t even on my
Level, not even in my league.
VINCENT
Thank god for that.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 76
MARCUS
And he wonders why he didn‟t have a
date for the prom.
JOHNNY
Hey pal, I chose not to have a date for
the prom. I wanted to keep my options
open that night.
MARCUS
Oh yeah? How‟d that work out for you?
JOHNNY
(thinking)
Shut the fuck up.
MARCUS
And if it isn‟t the preppy jerkoffs from
Moses Brown. What are you guys doing at
Scarborough? It‟s not like you people
to be slumming like this. Shouldn‟t you
be hanging out at Bonnet Shores in your
daddies‟ cabanas while your alcoholic
moms fuck the pool boy back at home.
The Moses Brown kid looks around the beach and is disgusted
by the type of people, mostly blue collar guidos, he sees.
JOHNNY
Well you guys are here which I‟m sure is
contributing to that.
MARCUS
What do you guys want?
JOHNNY
What, it‟s not enough that you guys kick
our ass on the football field? Now you
want to do it on the beach?
CHARLIE O
Hey Johnny, they only beat us because our
guys get high before the game.
JOHNNY
Do they?
CHARLIE O
Yeah, I should know, I‟m the one that
sells to them.
JOHNNY
That explains a lot.
CHARLIE O
Speaking of which, does anyone want to
get high?
MARCUS
Now‟s not the time Charlie O.
MARCUS
Something tells me that this won‟t end
up as a friendly game, but nonetheless,
challenge accepted.
The Moses Brown kid picks up his football then walks away
with the rest of his buddies.
MARCUS
OK, so who‟s in for bitchslapping those
pussies from Moses Brown?
ROBERT
You know I‟m always down for a good
old fashioned brawl.
VINCENT
That‟s an understatement.
MARCUS
OK, who else?
JOHNNY
You know it.
VINCENT
Me too.
JOHNNY
Why am I not surprised that those bitches
didn‟t bring any women to the beach with
them?
CHARLIE O
Because they‟re freakin‟ queers.
CHARLIE O
You hear me! You‟re freakin‟ queers!
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 79
MARCUS
OK, calm down Charlie, save that
aggression for the field.
CHARLIE O
Sorry, you know me; I‟m always ready
for a spirited athletic competition.
MARCUS
(doubtfully)
Ummm, yeah, right.
JOEY
I want to play.
MARCUS
Vinny, what do you think about your
brother playing?
VINCENT
I don‟t know, they look kind of big.
JOEY
(slurring)
I can handle them.
VINCENT
I‟m sure you think you could, but I‟m
responsible for you. What would mom
and dad say if you came home with a
sprained ankle? Not to mention you
are ditching school in the first place.
No, not going to happen.
JOEY
(slurring heavily)
Fuck you, I want play!
VINCENT
Joseph, come over here.
JOEY
(combatively)
What?
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 80
VINCENT
Let me look at your eyes.
VINCENT
You‟re drunk!
JOEY
What? No I‟m not.
VINCENT
Yes you are, you smell like booze…and
weed! Friggin‟ weed! You‟re wasted!
JOEY
No I‟m…
STACEY
Ewww.
JOEY
…OK, maybe I am a little bit.
VINCENT
Gee, I wonder who could‟ve gotten you
drunk.
CHARLIE O
Don‟t look at me.
VINCENT
I should fucking kill you Charlie.
VINCENT
Come on, why don‟t you fight like a man,
bitch.
CHARLIE O
What‟s your deal dude?
VINCENT
You got my brother drunk!
CHARLIE O
No I didn‟t.
VINCENT
Who did then?
CHARLIE O
I don‟t know but it wasn‟t me. Look
around, there‟s a cooler full of booze
here. Maybe he was curious after seeing
what big brother was doing and he got
into the cooler himself.
VINCENT
Don‟t make me out to be the bad guy.
You‟re a fucking loser Charlie O, and
you‟ll always be a fucking loser!
MARCUS
(yells)
Guys, stop. Stop! Let‟s calm down and
focus our hatred on the real enemy.
(points down the beach)
Moses Brown.
VINCENT
Fine.
VINCENT
You‟re still an asshole though Charlie.
VINCENT
OK Joseph, you can play in our football
(MORE)
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 82
VINCENT (cont‟d)
game. Consider that your punishment
for getting wasted.
JOEY
(sarcastically)
Thanks. I don‟t know if I want to play
anymore.
VINCENT
Ohhh, you‟re playing now and I hope you
get hit…hard. Knock some sense into you.
MARCUS
Stanley, you in?
STANLEY
I‟d like to be, that is if you guys don‟t
mind.
MARCUS
No, come on over here and be part of the
team.
STANLEY
Great!
MARCUS
Ladies?
STACEY
What? You want us to play?
MARCUS
Well yeah, sure.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 83
CHARLIE O
It sure would be awesome if we beat those
Moses Brown bitches with a bunch of girls.
STACEY
As tempting as that is I think us girls
would just prefer to be your cheerleaders.
VINCENT
Are you sure?
KAREN
Yes. Besides, we all just had our nails
done yesterday.
JODI
And we‟re not about to break them playing
Moses Brown.
SANDY
If it was Cranston West though, that‟d
be a different story.
JODI
That‟s true, I hate those skanks.
STACEY
Me too. They‟d be worth breaking a nail
over…preferably from gouging their eyes
out.
KAREN
Sing it sister.
JOHNNY
Vinny pass me the ball.
JOHNNY
Nice throw man!
VINCENT
Go ahead Stan, let‟s see the arm.
VINCENT
OK, Stanley is not our quarterback.
Just for anyone wondering, he will not
be quarterbacking our team…thankfully.
VINCENT
That‟s OK champ, you can‟t be good at
everything. Look at me, I suck at math.
You‟re probably great at it.
STANLEY
I was in the junior high math Olympiad.
VINCENT
(surprised)
They have Olympics for math?
STANLEY
Kinda.
VINCENT
See, that‟s what I mean.
The Moses Brown kid yells out from across the beach.
MARCUS
Well fellas, it‟s time to kick some ass.
JOHNNY
You know it.
MARCUS
Guys, get your hands in here.
MARCUS
“Go Cougars” on three, OK?
(pause)
1, 2, 3!
MARCUS
OK assholes, we got seven guys. Now
you pick your seven guys.
Stacey, Sandy, Jodi and Karen walk up behind Marcus and the
other guys.
JOHNNY
You‟d like that wouldn‟t you? It‟d
probably be the first time you guys
would ever touch a girl.
STACEY
We don‟t want to embarrass you guys
either so we‟re just going to sit this
one out.
VINCENT
So assuming you homos can count to
seven without having your butlers do
it for you, can we get your seven guys
to line up against us?
MARCUS
Fine with us.
MARCUS
Nah, nah, you guys can have the ball
first.
MARCUS
I don‟t want any excuses when we kick
your ass. Take the ball first.
MARCUS
We‟ll make it easy, your blanket is
one end zone, our blanket is the other.
MARCUS
What about on a line with that trash
can over there and the seaweed over
here.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 87
The Moses Brown kid throws the ball hard into Stanley‟s
stomach. He doesn‟t catch it but he temporarily keels over
from the impact.
Joey picks up the ball as the guys walk back over to their
blanket.
The girls stay off to the side behind the line of seaweed
and half way between their blanket and the Moses Brown
kids‟ blanket. They start cheering for their friends.
STACEY
(yells)
Let‟s go boys!
KAREN
(yells)
Go get „em!
JOHNNY
Who‟s throwing off?
MARCUS
Who has the strongest arm?
JOHNNY
I don‟t know but I‟m willing to bet
that Vinny has the strongest wrist.
Especially since he‟s probably staying
up all night these days thinking of
Karen.
VINCENT
Ha, ha, very funny guys.
ROBERT
Joey give me the rock, I‟ll throw it
off.
The center snaps him the ball, he drops back a few steps
and waits a couple seconds before he throws the ball to one
of his wide receivers about twenty yards down the field.
Marcus walks around the middle of the playing area with his
arms up in the air, upset over what just happened.
MARCUS
So is this how we‟re going to play?
JOHNNY
They‟re dirty, just like their mothers
and sisters.
MARCUS
Fuck you.
Marcus and friends have the ball deep in their own end.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 89
MARCUS
Huddle up guys.
MARCUS
OK, it‟s 4-4, we‟ve had a great comeback.
It‟s a testament to our grittiness.
Stanley, be prepared, the ball is coming
to you this time.
STANLEY
(shocked)
What?!?
MARCUS
Yes.
STANLEY
Are you sure you want to do this? I
haven‟t caught a pass yet.
MARCUS
That‟s right, we have the element of
surprise right here with you. Besides,
Robert, Vinny and Johnny are being
covered like crazy…and Charlie O, boy
Charlie O can hardly see straight,
he‟ll hopefully be a good decoy though.
JOEY
What about me? Even though I‟m drunk
I can catch, I can score a touchdown.
MARCUS
I know you can.
JOEY
So throw me the ball damnit.
STANLEY
Yeah, throw him the ball.
MARCUS
I‟ll tell you what Joey, you‟ll be my
second option if Stanley‟s not open.
Deal?
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 90
JOEY
(thinking)
Fine.
STANLEY
Marcus, are you sure you don‟t want
to use him as you‟re first option?
MARCUS
Stanley, there comes a time in every
guy‟s life when they just have to nut
up. This is your time. You hear me?
Your time to nut up.
STANLEY
OK, I will.
One of the Moses Brown guys yells out from the other side
of the line of scrimmage.
MARCUS
Cougars on three…1, 2, 3.
MARCUS
Hut, hut, hike!
MARCUS
(pumps his fist)
Yeah, Stanley!
Another Moses Brown kid comes over, picks up the ball and
runs to the end zone while Stanley‟s teammates let him
score. They‟ve stop caring about the game and instead run
over to make sure he‟s OK.
JOHNNY
You‟re all a bunch of douchebags.
MARCUS
Stanley, you OK?
STANLEY
Sorry Marcus, I thought I was going to
score. I failed. It‟s my fault.
MARCUS
It‟s not your fault, it‟s theirs.
They‟re a bunch of assholes.
With all the Moses Brown kids gathered in the other end
zone celebrating their win, Robert walks across the playing
area with a determined look on his face.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 92
ROBERT
Hey…hey! Hey dickheads! You think you
can do that to one of my boys!?!
Robert hauls off and punches the guy in the face, dropping
him like a sack of potatoes.
JOHNNY
Well, we‟re fighting now whether we
like it or not.
JOEY
Thanks.
VINCENT
You might be an annoying idiot, but
you‟re still my little brother. I got
you‟re back. Now go, get out of this
fight.
STACEY
Jodi, get back here!
KAREN
That is one crazy bitch.
JODI
Ohhh shit.
STACEY
Karen‟s right, you are a crazy bitch.
JODI
Whatever, I wasn‟t going to let someone
punch my man and not do anything about
it. Why don‟t you help Marcus?
STACEY
He‟s not my man.
JODI
(doubtfully)
Yeah…right.
MARCUS
Guys, guys, let‟s break it up. Let‟s
go back to our spot and drink some
beers.
ROBERT
(yells)
You‟re still a bunch of dickheads
though and you always will be.
ROBERT
Fuck you.
MARCUS
Robbie, come on, don‟t get us into
another fight. Forget about those
assholes. Let‟s just drink some beer.
ROBERT
OK, OK, they just piss me off.
MARCUS
They piss all of us off, but don‟t let
them get to you. Forget about them.
We‟re here with all our friends, so
let‟s enjoy being here with all our
friends. Remember, we don‟t have that
much time left with each other.
ROBERT
You‟re right.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 95
The five guys continue walking while Robert, with his last
parting shot, raises his arm and flips the Moses Brown guys
off without even turning back or breaking his stride.
ROBERT
How you feeling there Stanley?
STANLEY
I‟m still a little woozy, but I think
I‟m OK.
ROBERT
Good.
STANLEY
Thanks for standing up and defending me.
ROBERT
No problem kid.
STANLEY
It was nice, especially since we haven‟t
talked to each other since 5th grade.
ROBERT
Hey, no one from another school is going
to come and pick on someone from my
school. At North Providence, we‟re all
brothers in the end.
ROBERT
Come on, high five me Stanley.
CHARLIE O
Hey, it‟s Miller Time guys!
All the guys, except for Stanley, run over to the cooler.
Stanley continues walking slowly, still woozy from the hard
hit he took.
SANDY
How are you feeling Stanley?
STANLEY
I‟ve felt better.
SANDY
You looked good out there.
STANLEY
I did? I got my butt kicked and I ended
up with a mouthful of sand.
SANDY
Yeah but you got up. That‟s the true
sign of a man.
STANLEY
I‟m a man?
SANDY
Well you‟re not a boy. You were tough
out there.
STANLEY
That‟s the first time anybody‟s called
me tough.
SANDY
I have a feeling you‟ll be experiencing
a lot of firsts today.
STANLEY
Speaking of that, since I‟m already
woozy I think I‟m going to have a
beer.
Stanley makes his way through the crowd at the blanket and
towards the cooler.
STANLEY
Excuse me, excuse me, make way, I‟m
trying to get a beer.
CHARLIE O
Stanley you actually want a beer?
STANLEY
Yeah, why not? When in Rome, right?
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 97
CHARLIE O
(confused)
Are we in Rome, Rhode Island? I thought
we were in Narragansett?
STANLEY
We are, it‟s just an expression.
CHARLIE O
You‟re a smart dude.
CHARLIE O (cont‟d)
I like you, you‟re a good kid. What
can I get you?
STANLEY
I guess I‟ll take a Busch.
Charlie O grabs a Busch beer can from the cooler and gives
it to him.
MARCUS
I‟d like to propose a toast.
MARCUS (cont‟d)
To Stanley…the guy that almost won us
the game.
EVERYONE
To Stanley!
VINCENT
How are you feeling?
JOEY
The beach is spinning.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 98
VINCENT
It doesn‟t feel good, right?
JOEY
Not at all.
VINCENT
See you should listen to me more, I‟m
just trying to protect you.
STACEY
Ewww, still? Is he ever going to stop?
VINCENT
He just has to give it time.
JOEY
Awww god, I feel like hell.
VINCENT
I still hate you Charlie O.
MARCUS
Look at the sun setting.
JOHNNY
Yeah, it‟s like a metaphor for all of
our friendships.
MARCUS
Ohhh, stop being so overdramatic.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 99
JOHNNY
What? It‟s true. There‟s not going to
be many more times when all of us are
going to be together in one place.
MARCUS
It‟s not like we‟re all going off to
die. We‟ll still have holidays and
other breaks.
JOHNNY
Yeah but I am going into the Army, I‟m
not going to have that many breaks.
MARCUS
Please, the military is a great gig
these days, the world is totally safe.
The Soviet Union is dead, who else is
going to step up and fight America?
They‟d have to be crazy.
JOHNNY
That may be so but you never know.
MARCUS
Please, look at the world today, it‟s
fine. America‟s on top, who‟s going
to mess with us? Russia? They‟ve got
bigger problems than us, like standing
in line for hours to get bread and
toilet paper. Iraq? We already
slapped those pricks around once.
JOHNNY
Yeah but we left the man in power.
MARCUS
Whatever, he‟s impotent now, nothing
for us to worry about anymore.
JOHNNY
(laughs)
Ha ha, you said impotent.
MARCUS
Yes…yes I did.
STACEY
So are you excited for the Army?
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 100
JOHNNY
Yeah, yeah I think I am.
MARCUS
I don‟t get it.
JOHNNY
What? The military runs in my blood,
my grandfather was a colonel in World
War II, my uncle was a lieutenant in
Vietnam and I have two cousins in the
Marines who fought in Desert Storm.
This is my destiny.
MARCUS
I know that, and I respect your family
but this whole military thing, it‟s
still barbaric.
JOHNNY
` Why?
MARCUS
Well outside of being the most sexist
institution ever filled with a bunch of
mindless meatheads, they never seem to
have much of a problem indiscriminately
killing civilians during wartime.
JOHNNY
Great, I love how you just listed all
the common stereotypes associated with
the Army; that‟s the lazy man‟s way of
arguing. But come on, even you should
know they don‟t intentionally go out
looking to kill civilians.
MARCUS
You‟re so naïve.
JOHNNY
I‟m not saying it doesn‟t happen but
war is hell, things happen sometimes.
Besides, you yourself said that we‟re
done with war so according to you it
should be a non-issue for me.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 101
MARCUS
I just don‟t understand war, I don‟t
understand how things just can‟t be
solved diplomatically.
JOHNNY
God you‟re such a Democrat, I feel bad
for you sometimes. There‟s some crazy
people out there and some of those people
control resources that could potentially
threaten us one day. That‟s where we
come in, to keep them in check. To keep
the peace.
MARCUS
Good luck with that, me however will
remain anti-war.
JOHNNY
Marcus, it‟s not like I‟m pro war. On
the contrary, I‟m pro peace. We have
the military to enforce the peace, not
to instigate a war.
MARCUS
I don‟t believe that, but I do respect
your opinions and the decisions you make…
no matter how wrong they are.
JOHNNY
You‟re a dick.
MARCUS
You love it though.
VINCENT
Such a great view.
KAREN
What a beautiful sunset.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 102
JOEY
Are you guys holding hands?!? Are you
guys boyfriend and girlfriend?
KAREN
Hey squirt, you finally woke up!
VINCENT
Joey, shut up and mind your business.
Just enjoy the sunset, eat your chips
and try to sober up.
JOEY
How long was I out for?
VINCENT
Two, two and a half hours.
JOEY
My head is pounding.
VINCENT
Well that‟s because you‟re drunk.
JOEY
(shakes his head)
I don‟t like being drunk.
VINCENT
I didn‟t think you would. I tried to
warn you, but you didn‟t listen. I‟m
just trying to help you out in life but
you don‟t get that.
VINCENT (cont‟d)
Here, have some water. It‟ll rehydrate
you. You‟ll feel better after this.
JOEY
Thanks. I feel like puking.
VINCENT
Again? I don‟t think you have anything
left in your system at this point.
JOEY
What? I puked before?
VINCENT
Multiple times.
JOEY
How many?
VINCENT
I lost count at 4.
KAREN
I think it was 5 or 6.
JOEY
Ewww, I don‟t even remember any of that.
VINCENT
So are you going to drink again anytime
soon?
JOEY
No way.
VINCENT
Good boy.
(pause)
Karen can you pass me over another beer?
Karen gives him a beer that was sitting next to her which
he promptly opens and takes a large drink from.
JOEY
Ewww, just watching you drink that beer
makes me want to vomit again.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 104
VINCENT
Well if you‟re going to puke make sure
you make it to the ocean or a trash can
this time.
JOEY
Nahhh, I don‟t think I‟m going to puke.
I think I‟ll be fine.
VINCENT
That‟s a relief.
JOEY
So are you two going to kiss?
VINCENT
God, you‟re so less annoying when you‟re
passed out drunk.
VINCENT
Look at Robbie and Jodi over there.
KAREN
Awww, they look so cute.
VINCENT
Yeah it‟s amazing, they actually look
like a real couple when they‟re not
talking to each other.
JODI
Don‟t you just love how the sunrays
reflect off the clouds, making them
shine that pretty color of pink?
ROBERT
Shhh, don‟t ruin the moment by talking.
JODI
Ohhhkay.
And with that, the two of them just sit there in silence,
still in each other‟s arms though.
SANDY
I love watching the waves crash into
the beach as the sun goes down. It‟s
so tranquil. Don‟t you think?
SANDY
Are you OK Stanley?
STANLEY
(nervously)
Ummm, yeah, yeah I‟m OK.
SANDY
(laughs)
Are you nervous?
STANLEY
A little.
SANDY
Why are you nervous?
STANLEY
I don‟t know actually. Here we are
sitting together watching this beautiful
sunset and for some reason I‟m nervous.
I‟m so nervous that my palms are sweaty
(MORE)
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 106
STANLEY (cont‟d)
and the sand is sticking to my hands.
See.
STANLEY
So this is funny?
SANDY
Sorry, but yes, yes it is.
STANLEY
I guess it is pretty funny.
SANDY
Stanley, you‟re a trip.
STANLEY
A trip?
SANDY
Yeah, you know, you‟re funny, you‟re
fun.
STANLEY
(innocently)
Thank you, but I don‟t usually mean to
be.
SANDY
Stanley.
STANLEY
Yes.
SANDY
Do you want to kiss me?
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 107
STANLEY
(nervously)
Yes.
SANDY
OK.
SANDY
Was that your first time?
STANLEY
Yes, I guess that‟s why I was so nervous,
I think maybe subconsciously I knew
something like this might have been a
possibility when we sat down together
to enjoy the sunset.
SANDY
(laughs)
I told you I had a feeling you‟d be
experiencing a lot of firsts today.
STANLEY
I wouldn‟t mind experiencing some
seconds either.
SANDY
(laughs)
You‟re funny. I think I can help you
out on one of the seconds.
SANDY
Well you could‟ve fooled me about
this being your first time.
STANLEY
Thank you.
SANDY
Stanley, sorry I was such a bitch to
you before.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 108
STANLEY
That‟s OK, you just didn‟t know me.
SANDY
You‟re right, and I‟m sorry for judging
you without really knowing you.
STANLEY
That‟s OK Sandy, it‟s all in the past
and I just want to concentrate on the
present.
SANDY
Me too.
Karen looks over to the two of them and sees them kissing.
KAREN
(shocked)
Well I‟ll be damned.
KAREN (cont‟d)
Vincent, look.
Vincent turns his head and sees Stanley making out with
Sandy.
VINCENT
(smiles)
There you go champ. Get after it.
KAREN
That‟s so sweet.
VINCENT
It is.
(pause)
Karen.
KAREN
Yes, Vincent.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 109
VINCENT
Can I take you out for some pizza
tomorrow night?
KAREN
You mean, like a date?
VINCENT
Well yes.
KAREN
A real date, huh?
VINCENT
Yes, an honest to goodness real date.
KAREN
Can Joey come?
KAREN
(laughs)
I‟m just kidding Vincent, relax.
VINCENT
(confused)
Sooo, back to this date.
KAREN
(interrupts)
Yes, I‟d love to go out on a date with
you. Truth be told I‟ve had a little
crush on you for the last few months.
VINCENT
You have?
KAREN
Yes.
VINCENT
Sweet, so have I! I wish I knew this
before, I would‟ve acted sooner.
(pause)
Well now that I know where we both stand
let‟s kick the date up a notch. How
(MORE)
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 110
VINCENT (cont‟d)
about we do Applebee‟s and a movie at
the Showcase?
KAREN
(laughs)
Ha, sounds great!
Marcus looks around and notices that all of the guys are
getting comfortable and cozy with the girl they‟re hanging
out with.
MARCUS
Everyone looks like they‟re getting
along really well around here.
STACEY
I guess it‟s the magic of the sea.
MARCUS
Strangely, we‟re like the only ones
not holding hands.
STACEY
Well we should be.
MARCUS
Oh yeah? Why‟s that?
STACEY
Are we not boyfriend and girlfriend?
MARCUS
I didn‟t think we are.
STACEY
Well I thought we were?
MARCUS
No shit?
STACEY
What‟s that supposed to mean?
MARCUS
Don‟t get me wrong, I would love to be
your boyfriend, I just didn‟t think you
wanted to be my girlfriend.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 111
STACEY
I think we have to work on our
communication skills.
MARCUS
Apparently.
MARCUS
So let me get this straight, we are
boyfriend and girlfriend, right?
STACEY
Yes, that is if you want us to be.
MARCUS
Oh boy, I want us to be.
STACEY
Good. So we are.
MARCUS
Great, we are!
STACEY
(smiles)
Hi boyfriend.
MARCUS
(laughs)
Hi girlfriend.
(pause)
Ohhh, what the hell.
CHARLIE O
I‟m back…and I brought some goodies.
JOHNNY
Jeez Chucky, we were wondering what
happened to you.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 112
CHARLIE O
Let that be a lesson to you all, don‟t
ever send a stoned guy off to get a
group dinner.
JOHNNY
Well I was thinking that‟d be a positive
since your munchies would probably force
you to buy too much food, which is never
a bad thing.
MARCUS
Where‟d you go?
JOHNNY
That little fish n‟ chips shack across
the street.
ROBERT
Ohhh, I love that place. Hook me up
with some.
CHARLIE O
OK, OK, all in good time; don‟t grab.
I got stuffies though, I thought the
fish n‟ chips would be too difficult
to eat with plastic knives and forks.
ROBERT
Whatever, I‟m so starved I‟ll eat
anything.
JOHNNY
What? My snacks weren‟t good enough
for you?
ROBERT
They were, but they were exactly what
they‟re called…snacks. Now it‟s time
for dinner.
VINCENT
I just wish they‟d let us grill out
here, I could use a steak.
JOEY
Whatever, you‟d probably burn down
the beach.
VINCENT
What are you talking about drunk boy?
JOEY
You don‟t remember the time you almost
burned down our house when the parents
were away and you tried to turn on the
gas grill by yourself?
MARCUS
Holy shit! I remember that! I was
there!
JOEY
That fireball must have flown four, five
feet up in the air. Almost singed your
eyebrows off.
VINCENT
(defensively)
None of that would‟ve happened if dad
connected the hose right to begin with.
JOEY
(laughs)
Riiight. Keep on believing that.
VINCENT
I liked you better when you were black-
out drunk.
MARCUS
I‟m sorry man, I love you and all but
I got to go with your little brother
on this one. You had no fucking clue
what you were doing.
VINCENT
Screw you.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 114
MARCUS
Whoa, whoa, whoa, calm down!
STACEY
Vinny, stop it!
VINCENT
OK fine.
CHARLIE O
So what did I miss while I was gone?
JOHNNY
Nothing.
CHARLIE O
Well what were you guys talking about?
MARCUS
The future.
CHARLIE O
Really? That‟s deep.
JOHNNY
What about you Chaz, what about your
future?
CHARLIE O
My future? I have no future.
MARCUS
What? Come on, everyone has a future.
Even Vincent has a future.
VINCENT
What? I heard my name.
MARCUS
You have a future right?
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 115
VINCENT
Yeah I guess. I have a great uncle in
New York City that hooked me up with
a summer internship. He‟s at this place
called Cantor Fitzgerald. I‟m not even
sure I know what they do, they‟re into
trading or something like that. I
don‟t know, but my dad says they‟re
really legit…and they‟re in the World
Trade Center. So I‟m going to try
that out and see what happens, I‟m
sure I‟ll make some good contacts at
least.
KAREN
(sadly)
So you‟re going to be away for the
summer?
VINCENT
Not really. Two month internship,
four days a week, I‟m home Fridays-
Sundays, so it‟s not that big of a
deal. I‟ll still be around a lot.
KAREN
Ohhh OK, good.
KAREN (cont‟d)
I was afraid I was going to lose you
before I even got you.
MARCUS
See Charlie O, even Vincent has a
future, and I think most people gave
up on him years ago.
VINCENT
Thanks dick.
MARCUS
Just go with me on this Vin.
(pause)
My point is, Chuck, everyone has a
future.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 116
CHARLIE O
Na-uh, not me. If I think about my
future I‟m just going to be setting
myself up for failure, and that‟s too
much of a burden for me to handle. I
don‟t have a future.
MARCUS
Sure you do. What are you good at?
CHARLIE O
Nothing.
MARCUS
Nothing? Come on everyone‟s good at
something.
CHARLIE O
(agitated)
I‟m good at being an alcoholic drug
addict! That‟s all I‟ve ever been good
at and that‟s all I‟ll ever be good at!
I mean look at me? Look at what I do,
I got Vinny‟s little brother drunk for
no reason. Because I thought it‟d be
funny? Maybe. Because I was bored?
Probably. Because I‟m a fuck up?
Definitely. Look, I‟m going to shitty
community college and I‟ll probably
flunk out of that because, again, I‟m
a fucking drug addict!
JOHNNY
You probably won‟t flunk out of
community college, my cousin made
it through in three years and she‟s
an idiot.
CHARLIE O
Maybe Vinny‟s right, I am a fucking
loser…and I always will be.
MARCUS
No you‟re not. Vincent was just angry,
he didn‟t mean it.
(MORE)
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 117
MARCUS (cont‟d)
(yells out to Vincent)
Did you Vinny?
VINCENT
(thinking)
No, I guess I didn‟t. Charlie O, you‟re
not a loser, you just do dumb shit a lot
of times.
CHARLIE O
I‟ll take that and I accept your apology.
MARCUS
You know Charlie, we can get you help
to battle your addictions.
CHARLIE O
Thanks, but I don‟t want it. I‟m
perfectly content with being a fuck
up.
MARCUS
Are you sure?
CHARLIE O
Marcus, thanks, but I‟m fine. I just
want to eat my stuffies in peace.
MARCUS
OK, fine. Be like that.
CHARLIE O
I will.
CHARLIE O
Would you like a hit? Would you like
to join me in my fuckedupness? Come
on, help me put the high in North
Providence High.
MARCUS
Nah, I‟m good.
CHARLIE O
OK, you don‟t know what you‟re missing
though. This is some good shit; the
chronic man, the chronic.
MARCUS
And I think Charlie O is finally good
for the day.
CHARLIE O
Nah man, I‟m alright, I‟m just looking
up at all the funny cloud shapes in the
sky.
JOHNNY
Oh yeah? What do you see?
CHARLIE O
An elephant carrying a briefcase with
his trunk. A Ford Explorer. A karate
master breaking a piece of wood. And,
ummm, I think I see the Easter bunny
in mid-hop…that or it‟s someone jumping
rope, I really can‟t tell.
JOHNNY
Charlie I can‟t make out one thing
you‟re looking at, not one fucking
thing.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 119
CHARLIE O
That‟s because you‟re not expanding your
mind. You look at something and take
it at face value, I on the other hand
see something and look for different ways
to interpret it…I‟m always searching for
the deeper meaning of things.
MARCUS
Now who‟s the deep one?
CHARLIE O
Hey, I have my moments.
MARCUS
Guys, look around. This is what it‟s
all about. Friends hanging out with
friends, high school seniors…not a care
in the world. This is the last time
it‟ll be like that. We‟re going off to
college, going off to internships, going
off to work, going off to the army;
we‟re all going into a world filled with
responsibilities. No longer can we hide
behind our parents, siblings and friends.
We‟ll have to man up and take ownership
of our lives, both the good and the bad.
MARCUS (cont‟d)
And who could‟ve asked for a better day
to ditch? Not only was the weather great
but the day was chock full of pleasant
surprises. I found out today that I‟ve
had a girlfriend for the last two months.
Vincent and Karen are finally going to
go on a date, which is great because,
honestly Karen, Vincent has been in-
fatuated with you for a long time now,
so it‟s great to see that.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 120
MARCUS (cont‟d)
And we showed that we could not only be
lovers but we could be fighters as well
by getting a few good punches on those
pricks from Moses Brown.
ROBERT
Damn right we did!
MARCUS
And who would‟ve ever thought this
morning that by the evening Sandy and
Stanley would be sitting on the beach
together hand-in-hand. It‟s so precious.
I just want to pinch your cheeks, you‟re
both so cute.
MARCUS (cont‟d)
As the sun sets and day turns into night,
I think one last toast is in order.
MARCUS
To high school friendships.
VINCENT
May they live forever.
EVERYONE
Here, here.
JOHNNY
One last jump into the water?
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 121
MARCUS
Last one in buys the beer tonight.
As the sun goes down completely and day turns into dusk,
all of them sprint into the water and splash around.
STACEY (V.O.)
And that ditch day at the beach was the
last time we all hung out together.
The next week we graduated, and the
week after that Johnny shipped off to
basic training.
(pauses)
A lot of things have happened in the ten
years since high school and most of them
have been centered around tragedies.
Vincent made such an impression during
his two-month internship at Cantor
Fitzgerald that he continued on with
a summer internship during college and
was hired as a full-time analyst at
the firm right after graduation. Sadly,
he had just gotten to his office on
the 102nd floor of One World Trade
Center on September 11th, 2001 when a
hijacked airliner crashed into the
building. While his wallet was
eventually found three months later
perfectly intact, his body, or any
other remains for that matter, were
(MORE)
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 122
STACEY (V.O.)
There‟s Sandy and Stanley. They‟re not
together anymore, but they‟re still good
friends. They just had different paths
to follow in life. Stanley is a top
surgeon in Washington, DC while Sandy
became a high school teacher in
Providence.
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 125
SANDY
I‟m so sorry Stacey.
STANLEY
This sucks, he was such a good guy and
a great friend. He always made me feel
like a part of the group.
STACEY (V.O.)
That ditch day on the beach wasn‟t a
fluke as we all became good friends with
Stanley post-high school. Too bad we
didn‟t know what we were missing with
him earlier since we all would‟ve been
proud to call him a friend in high school
if we just gave him a chance.
Once they get to the top of the hill, they see rows and
rows of plots. They begin to head over to an area where
several people are gathered around a plot.
STACEY (V.O.)
Marcus was always anti-war, he hated the
idea of the military and he hated the
thought of violence. But even he couldn‟t
stand idly by after America was attacked.
It wasn‟t just Vincent‟s brother Joey
that walked into a Army recruitment office
on a cold, cloudy autumn day to seek
retribution. He was driven there by my
boyfriend, Marcus. They enlisted together,
although they were sent to separate units.
And while Joey eventually went to Afghani-
stan, Marcus found his way to Iraq. He
was a faithful boyfriend who found a way
to email me every week, except when he
was on a long reconnaissance mission,
then it was usually once every other
week. Marcus was initially upset that
he was sent to Iraq, and not Afghanistan
because he, like many other people, didn‟t
think Iraq had anything to do with 9/11
(MORE)
“Ditch Day” Original Screenplay by Jason Wiese 126
SINGERS
How do I say goodbye to what we had?
The good time that made us laugh out-
weigh the bad. I thought we‟d get to
see forever but forever‟s gone away.
It‟s so hard to say goodbye to yester-
day. I don‟t know where this road is
going to lead. All I know is where
we‟ve and what we‟ve been through.
If we get to see tomorrow, I hope it‟s
worth all the wait. It‟s so hard to
say goodbye to yesterday. And I‟ll
take with me the memory to be my
sunshine after the rain. It‟s so
hard to say goodbye to yesterday.
And I‟ll take with me the memory to
be my sunshine after the rain. It‟s
so hard to say goodbye to yesterday.
FADE OUT