Behaviour, India

Source:http://www.earth.org/travel-guide/India-Asia/behaviour
Some basics

There are some basic rules which are worth following if you wish to avoid social blunders. Indian soceity is based on a network of personal relationships. Typically an Indian will always find someone he or she knows before visiting an unkown place. This is a good practice to follow, once you get to know someone it is ok to ask for introductions or references if you are visiting another place.

If invited to an Indian persons house, it is usually the practice to remove footwear at the entrance. Indian people eat with their hands, so wash your hands before eating. While greeting an Indian woman, the traditional namaste (hands folded in front of your face) is more appropriate than shaking hands. Eat with your right hand, as the left hand is meant for other functions.

In India, its usually disrespectful to address people older then oneself (from ones parents generation) by the first name. If you are not comfortable using uncle or aunty, its okay to address them as Mr or Mrs so and so. While drinking water from a bottle being shared by other people, its common practice not to put ones mouth to the bottle, but to hold the bottle up and pour the water into the mouth. This takes a bit of practice. If you visit a holy place, always remove your footwear before entering. Wasting food is sometimes not appreciated, so its better to finish what is in your plate.

India is a conservative country and public display of affection is frowned upon. Kissing in public is not a good idea. Till recently, there were even no kissing scenes in Indian movies and its still considered quite bold to have such a scene in a movie.

About communication

In Europe we have a direct communication style: Means European people are saying what they are thinking, they come directly to the core message. Indians on the contrary have an indirect communication style. The relationship to your partner is more important than the factual level. In discussions you can communicate indirectly if you use: periphrases, explanations of backgrounds, not naming of the realmessage, neutralization of the message through using the 3. person, words like maybe, interrogative form, conjunctive, refer to a authority, point out some things you have in common, say some positive things before you criticise. Usually Indians will avoid bad news. This means also, that they dont mentioned it, if they have problems with the realization of an assignment, for example. Is an Indian not giving any answer, so could that 1

mean yes or no. Is he saying yes, mustnt that mean yes. Is he saying no, you have yet still the chance of a yes. Yes and no are not so absolutely used than in Europe. In general Indians talk a little bit louder and they start talking while someone else is still speaking. That doesnt mean that they are impolite. Moreover Indians roll with their head. That means, they are in harmony with you or they understand. It must not mean yes. If something is not clear, you should ask, but please with an open question. If you dont ask an open question you will again receive a head rolling. A nod means like in Europe yes and head shaking means no. Normally you have to use the right hand (for receiving visit cards, gifts or money for example). For men it is no problem to touch other men, they are not homosexual. But touching between women and men should be avoid. What you should know for business life

The traditional greeting is a little bow. But meanwhile is also handshaking common. Men usually wear western cloths, women normally Indian style. Women shouldnt wear a sexy outfit. During meetings only hierarchal higher persons are talking and making the decisions. Person with a lower hierarchal status are not able to make decisions, they always have to ask their boss. Indians try to get a conforming opinion. Indians perceive it as aggressive if you give them: short and clear answers, not a friendly introduction, not some polite words nearby or direct critic on the outcome.

Concerning conflicts, Indians are seeing problems in these cases: Lack of status acceptance Lack of acceptance of the person Absent qualifications of leadership Public critic, smart-alecky Lack of self-control, aggressiveness Neglect of the external relations

But the way to handle conflicts in India is also different, here are the basic rules:

Dont hear, see or notice Non-verbal expression: mimic, gesture Appeal to the things in common To alleviate, to belittle, to eviscerate

To reduce, banalize, to become emotional Refusal of agreements, passive resistance Give critic as fast as possible, but be careful an Indian should not loose his/her face. You should use a sandwich principle: good message, bad message, good message. It is important that you get a compromise, because besides the negotiable them, the good atmosphere and the relationship of the business partner is the most important. There is strong hierarchy. The boss normally knows all processes and makes all decisions. The boss has to give clear instructions. The superior has to ask for the personal belongings of his staff. Time goes slower in western cultures. There aren't any exact timetables. It's not that impolite, if someone has to wait. 5 minutes could mean 5 minutes, 1 hour, 2 hours, 1 day. In addition, the Indian culture is polychrome. Several tasks could be done at the same time. Outside the office, Indians are really hospitable. They often invite for family-celebrations, like a marriage. You should go there and bring a gift with you. That could be: flowers, sweets, something typical of your home region. You shouldnt bring alcohol; a lot of Indians dont drink. Indians love it to talk. They are really curious and eager for knowledge. Good subjects are family and sport. Avoid saying something about the poorness of the country, dont talk about erotic or sex. Other practical remarks You should take off your shoes before entering someones home or a temple. Dont hand something with your left hand over. Its seen as an insult. The cashier is not giving you the change directly in your hand. He will put it on the counter next to your hand. Thats not rude, Indians are just thinking that it brings bad luck to them and you if they put it right to your hand.

Dont touch another person or books with your feet, if it happens accidentally, you should excuse it! Dont put your feet on the table or on a chair. Smoking women are not seen often, everybody will stare at you. Please avoid smoking in face of your boss or older family members. Regarding pictures, please ask if you can take a photo a religious signs or poor people. Furthermore:

Be tolerant and patient. India is different. Do not come here and judge everything and everyone, as some people do. There are many aspects that you might find alien or hard to accept, but, remember it is a totally different country and culture. If you can look beyond the crowds, the pollution, the beggars, the dust and the noise, you might just be in for the experience of a lifetime. Be a spokesperson for India. When you go back home, tell all your family/friends/acquaintances about the wonderful time you had In India and urge them to visit. We sure could use more of those tourist dollars! Write an article in your local rag about your India experience. Better still, write a book!! Be polite and courteous. Not everyone is out to rip you off! Do not litter and add to the existing rubbish! We have enough for everyone!! Do not make constant comparisons about how everything is soooo much more efficient back home, even if its true. You 3

might hurt peoples sentiments. If you can afford to and feel like doing so, donate to a charity. But, be very careful which charity you donate to, check their credentials. If you have the time, you could visit an orphanage or an old peoples home and take some food or clothes along with you. The smiles you receive would be reward enough. But, no matter what you do for India, India will have done more for you! All you need is an open mind.