Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery; and whoever

marries her who is divorced from her husband commits adultery. Luke 16:18
There were some things which were connived at by the law, for the preventing of greater
mischiefs, the permission of which the gospel has indeed taken away, but without any
detriment or disparagement to the law, for it has thereby reduced them to the primitive
intention of the law, as in the case of divorce (v. 18), which we had before, Mt. 5:32;
19:9. Christ will not allow divorces, for his gospel is intended to strike at the bitter root of
men’s corrupt appetites and passions, to kill them, and pluck them up; and therefore
they must not be so far indulged as that permission did indulge them, for the more they
are indulged the more impetuous and headstrong they grow.
Or do you not know, brethren (for I speak to those who know the law), that the law
has dominion over a man as long as he lives? For the woman who has a husband
is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies,
she is released from the law of her husband. So then if, while her husband lives,
she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband
dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has
married another man. Therefore, my brethren, you also have become dead to the
law through the body of Christ, that you may be married to another—to Him who
was raised from the dead, that we should bear fruit to God. For when we were in
the flesh, the sinful passions which were aroused by the law were at work in our
members to bear fruit to death. But now we have been delivered from the law,
having died to what we were held by, so that we should serve in the newness of
the Spirit and not in the oldness of the letter. Roman 7:1-4

Among other arguments used in the foregoing chapter to persuade us against sin, and to
holiness, this was one (v. 14), that we are not under the law; and this argument is here
further insisted upon and explained (v. 6): We are delivered from the law. What is meant
by this? And how is it an argument why sin should not reign over us, and why we should
walk in newness of life? 1. We are delivered from the power of the law which curses and
condemns us for the sin committed by us. The sentence of the law against us is vacated
and reversed, by the death of Christ, to all true believers. The law saith, The soul that
sins shall die; but we are delivered from the law. The Lord has taken away thy sin, thou
shalt not die. We are redeemed from the curse of the law, Gal. 3:13. 2. We are delivered
from that power of the law which irritates and provokes the sin that dwelleth in us. This
the apostle seems especially to refer to (v. 5): The motions of sins which were by the
law. The law, by commanding, forbidding, threatening, corrupt and fallen man, but
offering no grace to cure and strengthen, did but stir up the corruption, and, like the sun
shining upon a dunghill, excite and draw up the filthy steams. We being lamed by the
fall, the law comes and directs us, but provides nothing to heal and help our lameness,
and so makes us halt and stumble the more. Understand this of the law not as a rule, but
as a covenant of works. Now each of these is an argument why we should be holy; for
here is encouragement to endeavours, though in many things we come short. We are
under grace, which promises strength to do what it commands, and pardon upon
repentance when we do amiss. This is the scope of these verses in general, that, in
point of profession and privilege, we are under a covenant of grace, and not under a
covenant of works-under the gospel of Christ, and not under the law of Moses. The
difference between a law-state and a gospel-state he had before illustrated by the
similitude of rising to a new life, and serving a new master; now here he speaks of is
under the similitude of being married to a new husband.

I. Our first marriage was to the law, which, according to the law of marriage, was to
continue only during the life of the law. The law of marriage is binding till the death of
one of the parties, no matter which, and no longer. The death of either discharges both.
For this he appeals to themselves, as persons knowing the law (v. 1): I speak to those
that know the law. It is a great advantage to discourse with those that have knowledge,
for such can more readily understand and apprehend a truth. Many of the Christians at
Rome were such as had been Jews, and so were well acquainted with the law. One has
some hold of knowing people. The law hath power over a man as long as he liveth; in
particular, the law of marriage hath power; or, in general, every law is so limited-the laws
of nations, of relations, of families, etc. 1. The obligation of laws extends no further; by
death the servant who, while he lived, was under the yoke, is freed from his master, Job
3:19. 2. The condemnation of laws extends no further; death is the finishing of the law.
Actio moritur cum personâ—The action expires with the person. The severest laws could
but kill the body, and after that there is no more that they can do. Thus while we were
alive to the law we were under the power of it-while we were in our Old-Testament state,
before the gospel came into the world, and before it came with power into our hearts.
Such is the law of marriage (v. 2), the woman is bound to her husband during life, so
bound to him that she cannot marry another; if she do, she shall be reckoned an
adulteress, v. 3. It will make her an adulteress, not only to be defiled by, but to be
married to, another man; for that is so much the worse, upon this account, that it abuses
an ordinance of God, by making it to patronise the uncleanness. Thus were we married
to the law (v. 5): When we were in the flesh, that is, in a carnal state, under the reigning
power of sin and corruption-in the flesh as in our element-then the motions of sins which
were by the law did work in our members, we were carried down the stream of sin, and
the law was but as an imperfect dam, which made the stream to swell the higher, and
rage the more. Our desire was towards sin, as that of the wife towards her husband, and
sin ruled over us. We embraced it, loved it, devoted all to it, conversed daily with it,
made it our care to please it. We were under a law of sin and death, as the wife under
the law of marriage; and the product of this marriage was fruit brought forth unto death,
that is, actual transgressions were produced by the original corruption, such as deserve
death. Lust, having conceived by the law (which is the strength of sin, 1 Co. 15:56),
bringeth forth sin, and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death, Jam. 1:15. This is the
posterity that springs from this marriage to sin and the law. This comes of the motions of
sin working in our members. And this continues during life, while the law is alive to us,
and we are alive to the law.

II. Our second marriage is to Christ: and how comes this about? Why,

1. We are freed, by death, from our obligation to the law as a covenant, as the wife is
from her obligation to her husband, v. 3. This resemblance is not very close, nor needed
it to be. You are become dead to the law, v. 4. He does not say, "The law is dead’’ (some
think because he would avoid giving offence to those who were yet zealous for the law),
but, which comes all to one, You are dead to the law. As the crucifying of the world to us,
and of us to the world, amounts to one and the same thing, so doth the law dying, and
our dying to it. We are delivered from the law (v. 6), kateµrgeµtheµmen—we are nulled
as to the law; our obligation to it as a husband is cassated and made void. And then he
speaks of the law being dead as far as it was a law of bondage to us: That being dead
wherein we were held; not the law itself, but its obligation to punishment and its
provocation to sin. It is dead, it has lost its power; and this (v. 4) by the body of Christ,
that is, by the sufferings of Christ in his body, by his crucified body, which abrogated the
law, answered the demands of it, made satisfaction for our violation of it, purchased for
us a covenant of grace, in which righteousness and strength are laid up for us, such as
were not, nor could be, by the law. We are dead to the law by our union with the mystical
body of Christ. By being incorporated into Christ in our baptism professedly, in our
believing powerfully and effectually, we are dead to the law, have no more to do with it
than the dead servant, that is free from his master, hath to do with his master’s yoke.
 2. We are married to Christ. The day of our believing is the day of our espousals to
the Lord Jesus. We enter upon a life of dependence on him and duty to him: Married to
another, even to him who is raised from the dead, a periphrasis of Christ and very
pertinent here; for as our dying to sin and the law is in conformity to the death of Christ,
and the crucifying of his body, so our devotedness to Christ in newness of life is in
conformity to the resurrection of Christ. We are married to the raised exalted Jesus, a
very honourable marriage. Compare 2 Co. 11:2; Eph. 5:29. Now we are thus married to
Christ, (1.) That we should bring forth fruit unto God, v. 4. One end of marriage is
fruitfulness: God instituted the ordinance that he might seek a godly seed, Mal. 2:15. The
wife is compared to the fruitful vine, and children are called the fruit of the womb. Now
the great end of our marriage to Christ is our fruitfulness in love, and grace, and every
good work. This is fruit unto God, pleasing to God, according to his will, aiming at his
glory. As our old marriage to sin produced fruit unto death, so our second marriage to
Christ produces fruit unto God, fruits of righteousness. Good works are the children of
the new nature, the products of our union with Christ, as the fruitfulness of the vine is the
product of its union with the root. Whatever our professions and pretensions may be,
there is no fruit brought forth to God till we are married to Christ; it is in Christ Jesus that
we are created unto good works, Eph. 2:10. The only fruit which turns to a good account
is that which is brought forth in Christ. This distinguishes the good works of believers
from the good works of hypocrites and self-justifiers that they are brought forth in
marriage, done in union with Christ, in the name of the Lord Jesus, Col. 3:17. This is,
without controversy, one of the great mysteries of godliness. (2.) That we should serve in
newness of spirit, and not in the oldness of the letter, v. 6. Being married to a new
husband, we must change our way. Still we must serve, but it is a service that is perfect
freedom, whereas the service of sin was a perfect drudgery: we must now serve in
newness of spirit, by new spiritual rules, from new spiritual principles, in spirit and in
truth, Jn. 4:24. There must be a renovation of our spirits wrought by the spirit of God,
and in that we must serve. Not in the oldness of the letter; that is, we must not rest in
mere external services, as the carnal Jews did, who gloried in their adherence to the
letter of the law, and minded not the spiritual part of worship. The letter is said to kill with
its bondage and terror, but we are delivered from that yoke that we may serve God
without fear, in holiness and righteousness, Lu. 1:74, 75. We are under the dispensation
of the Spirit, and therefore must be spiritual, and serve in the spirit. Compare with this 2
Co. 3:3, 6, etc. It becomes us to worship within the veil, and no longer in the outward
court.
But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain
even as I am; but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is
better to marry than to burn with passion. Now to the married I command, yet not I
but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. But even if she does
depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband
is not to divorce his wife. But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a
wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce
her. And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live
with her, let her not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the
wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your
children would be unclean, but now they are holy. But if the unbeliever departs, let
him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has
called us to peace. For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your
husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?
1 Corinthians 7:8-16

He sums up his sense on this head (v. 9, 10): I say therefore to the unmarried and
widows, to those in a state of virginity or widowhood, It is good for them if they abide
even as I. There are many conveniences, and especially at this juncture, in a single
state, to render it preferable to a married one. It is convenient therefore that the
unmarried abide as I, which plainly implies that Paul was at that time unmarried. But, if
they cannot contain, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn. This is God’s
remedy for lust. The fire may be quenched by the means he has appointed. And
marriage, with all its inconveniences, is much better than to burn with impure and lustful
desires. Marriage is honourable in all; but it is a duty in those who cannot contain nor
conquer those inclinations.

In this paragraph the apostle gives them direction in a case which must be very frequent
in that age of the world, especially among the Jewish converts; I mean whether they
were to live with heathen relatives in a married state. Moses’s law permitted divorce; and
there was a famous instance in the Jewish state, when the people were obliged to put
away their idolatrous wives, Ezra 10:3. This might move a scruple in many minds,
whether converts to Christianity were not bound to put away or desert their mates,
continuing infidels. Concerning this matter the apostle here gives direction. And,

I. In general, he tells them that marriage, by Christ’s command, is for life; and
therefore those who are married must not think of separation. The wife must not depart
from the husband (v. 10), nor the husband put away his wife, v. 11. This I command,
says the apostle; yet not I, but the Lord. Not that he commanded any thing of his own
head, or upon his own authority. Whatever he commanded was the Lord’s command,
dictated by his Spirit and enjoined by his authority. But his meaning is that the Lord
himself, with his own mouth, had forbidden such separations, Mt. 5:32; 19:9; Mk. 10:11;
Lu. 16:18. Note, Man and wife cannot separate at pleasure, nor dissolve, when they will,
their matrimonial bonds and relation. They must not separate for any other cause than
what Christ allows. And therefore the apostle advises that if any woman had been
separated, either by a voluntary act of her own or by an act of her husband, she should
continue unmarried, and seek reconciliation with her husband, that they might cohabit
again. Note, Husbands and wives should not quarrel at all, or should be quickly
reconciled. They are bound to each other for life. The divine law allows of no separation.
They cannot throw off the burden, and therefore should set their shoulders to it, and
endeavour to make it as light to each other as they can.

II. He brings the general advice home to the case of such as had an unbelieving
mate (v. 12): But to the rest speak I, not the Lord; that is, the Lord had not so expressly
spoken to this case as to the former divorce. It does not mean that the apostle spoke
without authority from the Lord, or decided this case by his own wisdom, without the
inspiration of the Holy Ghost. He closes this subject with a declaration to the contrary (v.
40), I think also that I have the Spirit of God. But, having thus prefaced his advice, we
may attend,

1. To the advice itself, which is that if an unbelieving husband or wife were pleased to
dwell with a Christian relative, the other should not separate. The husband should not
put away an unbelieving wife, nor the wife leave an unbelieving husband, v. 12, 13. The
Christian calling did not dissolve the marriage covenant, but bind it the faster, by bringing
it back to the original institution, limiting it to two persons, and binding them together for
life. The believer is not by faith in Christ loosed from matrimonial bonds to an unbeliever,
but is at once bound and made apt to be a better relative. But, though a believing wife or
husband should not separate from an unbelieving mate, yet if the unbelieving relative
desert the believer, and no means can reconcile to a cohabitation, in such a case a
brother or sister is not in bondage (v. 15), not tied up to the unreasonable humour, and
bound servilely to follow or cleave to the malicious deserter, or not bound to live
unmarried after all proper means for reconciliation have been tried, at least of the
deserter contract another marriage or be guilty of adultery, which was a very easy
supposition, because a very common instance among the heathen inhabitants of
Corinth. In such a case the deserted person must be free to marry again, and it is
granted on all hands. And some think that such a malicious desertion is as much a
dissolution of the marriage-covenant as death itself. For how is it possible that the two
shall be one flesh when the one is maliciously bent to part from or put away the other?
Indeed, the deserter seems still bound by the matrimonial contract; and therefore the
apostle says (v. 11), If the woman depart from her husband upon the account of his
infidelity, let her remain unmarried. But the deserted party seems to be left more at
liberty (I mean supposing all the proper means have been used to reclaim the deserter,
and other circumstances make it necessary) to marry another person. It does not seem
reasonable that they should be still bound, when it is rendered impossible to perform
conjugal duties or enjoy conjugal comforts, through the mere fault of their mate: in such
a case marriage would be a state of servitude indeed. But, whatever liberty be indulged
Christians in such a case as this, they are not allowed, for the mere infidelity of a
husband or wife, to separate; but, if the unbeliever be willing, they should continue in the
relation, and cohabit as those who are thus related. This is the apostle’s general
direction.

2. We have here the reasons of this advice. (1.) Because the relation or state is
sanctified by the holiness of either party: For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by
the wife, and the unbelieving wife by the husband (v. 14), or hath been sanctified. The
relation itself, and the conjugal use of each other, are sanctified to the believer. To the
pure all things are pure, Tit. 1:15. Marriage is a divine institution; it is a compact for life,
by God’s appointment. Had converse and congress with unbelievers in that relation
defiled the believer, or rendered him or her offensive to God, the ends of marriage would
have been defeated, and the comforts of it in a manner destroyed, in the circumstances
in which Christians then were. But the apostle tells them that, though they were yoked
with unbelievers, yet, if they themselves were holy, marriage was to them a holy state,
and marriage comforts, even with an unbelieving relative, were sanctified enjoyments. It
was no more displeasing to God for them to continue to live as they did before, with their
unbelieving or heathen relation, than if they had become converts together. If one of the
relatives had become holy, nothing of the duties or lawful comforts of the married state
could defile them, and render them displeasing to God, though the other were a
heathen. He is sanctified for the wife’s sake. She is sanctified for the husband’s sake.
Both are one flesh. He is to be reputed clean who is one flesh with her that is holy, and
vice versâ: Else were your children unclean, but now are they holy (v. 14), that is, they
would be heathen, out of the pale of the church and covenant of God. They would not be
of the holy seed (as the Jews are called, Isa. 6:13), but common and unclean, in the
same sense as heathens in general were styled in the apostle’s vision, Acts 10:28. This
way of speaking is according to the dialect of the Jews, among whom a child begotten
by parents yet heathens, was said to be begotten out of holiness; and a child begotten
by parents made proselytes was said to be begotten intra sanctitatem—within the holy
enclosure. Thus Christians are called commonly saints; such they are by profession,
separated to be a peculiar people of God, and as such distinguished from the world; and
therefore the children born to Christians, though married to unbelievers, are not to be
reckoned as part of the world, but of the church, a holy, not a common and unclean
seed. "Continue therefore to live even with unbelieving relatives; for, if you are holy, the
relation is so, the state is so, you may make a holy use even of an unbelieving relative,
in conjugal duties, and your seed will be holy too.’’ What a comfort is this, where both
relatives are believers! (2.) Another reason is that God hath called Christians to peace, v.
15. The Christian religion obliges us to act peaceably in all relations, natural and civil.
We are bound, as much as in us lies, to live peaceably with all men (Rom. 12:18), and
therefore surely to promote the peace and comfort of our nearest relatives, those with
whom we are one flesh, nay, though they should be infidels. Note, It should be the
labour and study of those who are married to make each other as easy and happy as
possible. (3.) A third reason is that it is possible for the believing relative to be an
instrument of the other’s salvation (v. 16): What knowest thou, O wife, whether thou
shalt save thy husband? Note, It is the plain duty of those in so near a relation to seek
the salvation of those to whom they are related. "Do not separate. There is other duty
now called for. The conjugal relation calls for the most close and endeared affection; it is
a contract for life. And should a Christian desert a mate, when an opportunity offers to
give the most glorious proof of love? Stay, and labour heartily for the conversion of thy
relative. Endeavour to save a soul. Who knows but this may be the event? It is not
impossible. And, though there be no great probability, saving a soul is so good and
glorious a service that the bare possibility should put one on exerting one’s self.’’ Note,
Mere possibility of success should be a sufficient motive with us to use our diligent
endeavours for saving the souls of our relations. "What know I but I may save his soul?
should move me to attempt it.’’
In the house His disciples also asked Him again about the same matter. So He
said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery
against her. And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she
commits adultery.” Mark 10:10-12

Christ’s discourse with his disciples, in private, about this matter, v. 10–12. It was an
advantage to them, that they had opportunity of personal converse with Christ, not only
about gospel mysteries, but about moral duties, for further satisfaction. No more is here
related of this private conference, that the law Christ laid down in this case—That it is
adultery for a man to put away his wife, and marry another; it is adultery against the wife
he puts away, it is a wrong to her, a breach of his contract with her, v. 11. He adds, If a
woman shall put away her husband, that is, elope from him, leave him by consent, and
be married to another, she commits adultery (v. 12), and it will be no excuse at all for her
to say that it was with the consent of her husband. Wisdom and grace, holiness and
love, reigning in the heart, will make those commands easy which to the carnal mind
may be as a heavy yoke.
He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the LORD. Proverb
18:22

1. A good wife is a great blessing to a man. He that finds a wife (that is, a wife
indeed; a bad wife does not deserve to be called by a name of so much honour), that
finds a help meet for him (that is a wife in the original acceptation of the word), that
sought such a one with care and prayer and has found what he sought, he has found a
good thing, a jewel of great value, a rare jewel; he has found that which will not only
contribute more than any thing to his comfort in this life, but will forward him in the way to
heaven. 2. God is to be acknowledged in it with thankfulness; it is a token of his favour,
and a happy pledge of further favours; it is a sign that God delights in a man to do him
good and has mercy in store for him; for this, therefore, God must be sought unto.
Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife,
as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your
prayers may not be hindered. 1 Peter 3:7

II. The husband’s duty to the wife comes next to be considered.

1. The particulars are, (1.) Cohabitation, which forbids unnecessary separation, and
implies a mutual communication of goods and persons one to another, with delight and
concord. (2.) Dwelling with the wife according to knowledge; not according to lust, as
brutes; nor according to passion, as devils; but according to knowledge, as wise and
sober men, who know the word of God and their own duty. (3.) Giving honour to the wife
—giving due respect to her, and maintaining her authority, protecting her person,
supporting her credit, delighting in her conversation, affording her a handsome
maintenance, and placing a due trust and confidence in her.

2. The reasons are, Because she is the weaker vessel by nature and constitution,
and so ought to be defended: but then the wife is, in other and higher respects, equal to
her husband; they are heirs together of the grace of life, of all the blessings of this life
and another, and therefore should live peaceably and quietly one with another, and, if
they do not, their prayers one with another and one for another will be hindered, so that
often "you will not pray at all, or, if you do, you will pray with a discomposed ruffled mind,
and so without success.’’ Learn, (1.) The weakness of the female sex is no just reason
either for separation or contempt, but on the contrary it is a reason for honour and
respect: Giving honour to the wife as unto the weaker vessel. (2.) There is an honour
due to all who are heirs of the grace of life. (3.) All married people should take care to
behave themselves so lovingly and peaceably one to another that they may not by their
broils hinder the success of their prayers.
 Giving thanks always for all things to God the Father in the name of our Lord
Jesus Christ, submitting to one another in the fear of God.

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head
of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the
body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their
own husbands in everything.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave
Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water
by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having
spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without
blemish. So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who
loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes
and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of His
body, of His flesh and of His bones. “For this reason a man shall leave his father
and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This is
a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let
each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see
that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:20-33

Thanksgiving is another duty that the apostle exhorts to, v. 20. We are appointed to
sing psalms, etc., for the expression of our thankfulness to God; but, though we are not
always singing, we should never want a disposition for this duty, as we never want
matter for it. We must continue it throughout the whole course of our lives; and we
should give thanks for all things; not only for spiritual blessings enjoyed, and eternal
ones expected (for what of the former we have in hand, and for what of the other we
have in hope), but for temporal mercies too; not only for our comforts, but also for our
sanctified afflictions; not only for what immediately concerns ourselves, but for the
instances of God’s kindness and favour to others also. It is our duty in every thing to give
thanks unto God and the Father, to God as the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ and our
Father in him, in whose name we are to offer up all our prayers, and praises, and
spiritual services, that they may be acceptable to God.

Here the apostle begins his exhortation to the discharge of relative duties. As a general
foundation for these duties, he lays down that rule v. 21. There is a mutual submission
that Christians owe one to another, condescending to bear one another’s burdens: not
advancing themselves above others, nor domineering over one another and giving laws
to one another. Paul was an example of this truly Christian temper, for he became all
things to all men. We must be of a yielding and of a submissive spirit, and ready to all
the duties of the respective places and stations that God has allotted to us in the world.
In the fear of God, that is, so far as is consistent with the fear of God, for his sake, and
out of conscience towards him, and that hereby we may give proof that we truly fear him.
Where there is this mutual condescension and submission, the duties of all relations will
be the better performed. From v. 22 to the end he speaks of the duties of husbands and
wives; and he speaks of these in a Christian manner, setting the church as an example
of the wife’s subjection, and Christ as an example of love in husbands.
 I. The duty prescribed to wives is submission to their husbands in the Lord (v. 22),
which submission includes the honouring and obeying of them, and that from a principle
of love to them. They must do this in compliance with God’s authority, who has
commanded it, which is doing it as unto the Lord; or it may be understood by way of
similitude and likeness, so that the sense may be, "as, being devoted to God, you submit
yourselves unto him.’’ From the former sense we may learn that by a conscientious
discharge of the duties we owe to our fellow-creatures we obey and please God himself;
and, from the latter, that God not only requires and insists on those duties which
immediately respect himself, but such as respect our neighbours too. The apostle
assigns the reason of this submission from wives: For the husband is the head of the
wife, v. 23. The metaphor is taken from the head in the natural body, which, being the
seat of reason, of wisdom, and of knowledge, and the fountain of sense and motion, is
more excellent than the rest of the body. God has given the man the pre-eminence and a
right to direct and govern by creation, and in that original law of the relation, Thy desire
shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee. Whatever there is of uneasiness in
this, it is an effect of sin coming into the world. Generally, too, the man has (what he
ought to have) a superiority in wisdom and knowledge. He is therefore the head, even
as Christ is the head of the church. There is a resemblance of Christ’s authority over the
church in that superiority and headship which God has appointed to the husband. The
apostle adds, and he is the Saviour of the body. Christ’s authority is exercised over the
church for the saving of her from evil, and the supplying of her with every thing good for
her. In like manner should the husband be employed for the protection and comfort of his
spouse; and therefore she should the more cheerfully submit herself unto him. So it
follows, Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ (v. 24), with cheerfulness, with
fidelity, with humility, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing—in every
thing to which their authority justly extends itself, in every thing lawful and consistent with
duty to God.

II. The duty of husbands (on the other hand), is to love their wives (v. 25); for without
this they would abuse their superiority and headship, and, wherever this prevails as it
ought to do, it will infer the other duties of the relation, it being a special and peculiar
affection that is required in her behalf. The love of Christ to the church is proposed as an
example of this, which love of his is a sincere, a pure, an ardent, and constant affection,
and that notwithstanding the imperfections and failures that she is guilty of. The
greatness of his love to the church appeared in his giving himself unto the death for it.
Observe, As the church’s subjection to Christ is proposed as an exemplar to wives, so
the love of Christ to his church is proposed as a pattern to husbands; and while such
exemplars are offered to both, and so much is required of each, neither has reason to
complain of the divine injunctions. The love which God requires from the husband in
behalf of his wife will make amends for the subjection which he demands from her to her
husband; and the prescribed subjection of the wife will be an abundant return for that
love of the husband which God has made her due. The apostle, having mentioned
Christ’s love to the church, enlarges upon it, assigning the reason why he gave himself
for it, namely, that he might sanctify it in this world, and glorify it in the next: That he
might sanctify and cleanse it, with the washing of water by the word (v. 26)—that he
might endue all his members with a principle of holiness, and deliver them from the guilt,
the pollution, and the dominion of sin. The instrumental means whereby this is affected
are the instituted sacraments, particularly the washing of baptism and the preaching and
reception of the gospel. And that he might present it to himself, etc., v. 27. Dr. Lightfoot
thinks the apostle alludes here to the Jews’ extraordinary carefulness in their washings
for purification. They were careful that there should be no wrinkle to keep the flesh from
the water, and no spot nor dirt which was not thoroughly washed. Others understand him
as alluding to a garment come newly out of the fuller’s hand, purged from spots,
stretched from wrinkles, the former newly contracted, the latter by long time and custom.
That he might present it to himself—that he might perfectly unite it to himself in the great
day, a glorious church, perfect in knowledge and in holiness, not having spot, nor
wrinkle, nor any such thing, nothing of deformity or defilement remaining, but being
entirely amiable and pleasing in his eye, holy and without blemish, free from the least
remains of sin. The church in general, and particular believers, will not be without spot or
wrinkle till they come to glory. From this and the former verse together we may take
notice that the glorifying of the church is intended in the sanctifying of it: and that those,
and those only, who are sanctified now, will be glorified hereafter.—So ought men to love
their wives as their own bodies, etc., v. 28. The wife being made one with her husband
(not in a natural, but in a civil and in a relative sense), this is an argument why he should
love her with as cordial and as ardent an affection as that which he loves himself. For no
man ever yet hated his own flesh, v. 29-(no man in his right senses ever hated himself,
however deformed, or whatever his imperfections might be); so far from it that he
nourishes and cherishes it; he uses himself with a great deal of care and tenderness,
and is industrious to supply himself with every thing convenient or good for him, with
food and clothing, etc. Even as the Lord the church: that is, as the Lord nourishes and
cherishes the church, which he furnishes with all things that he sees needful or good for
her, with whatever conduces to her everlasting happiness and welfare. The apostle
adds, For we are members of his body, of his flesh and of his bones, v. 30. He assigns
this as a reason why Christ nourishes and cherishes his church-because all who belong
to it are members of his body, that is, of his mystical body. Or, we are members out of
his body: all the grace and glory which the church has are from Christ, as Eve was taken
out of the man. But, as one observes, it being the manner of the sacred writings to
express a complex body by the enumeration of its several parts, as the heaven and
earth for the world, evening and morning for the natural day, so here, by body, flesh, and
bones, we are to understand himself, the meaning of the verse being that we are
members of Christ.—For this cause (because they are one, as Christ and his church are
one) shall a man leave his father and mother; the apostle refers to the words of Adam,
when Eve was given to him for a meet help, Gen. 2:24. We are not to understand by this
that a man’s obligation to other relations is cancelled upon his marriage, but only that
this relation is to be preferred to all others, there being a nearer union between these
two than between any others, that the man must rather leave any of those than his wife.
—And they two shall be one flesh, that is, by virtue of the matrimonial bond. This is a
great mystery, v. 32. Those words of Adam, just mentioned by the apostle, are spoken
literally of marriage; but they have also a hidden mystical sense in them, relating to the
union between Christ and his church, of which the conjugal union between Adam and
the mother of us all was a type: though not instituted or appointed by God to signify this,
yet it was a kind of natural type, as having a resemblance to it: I speak concerning Christ
and the church.

After this, the apostle concludes this part of his discourse with a brief summary of the
duty of husbands and wives, v. 33. "Nevertheless (though there be such a secret
mystical sense, yet the plain literal sense concerns you) let every one of you in particular
so love his wife even as himself, with such a sincere, peculiar, singular, and prevailing
affection as that is which he bears to himself. And the wife see that she reverence her
husband.’’ Reverence consists of love and esteem, which produce a care to please, and
of fear, which awakens a caution lest just offence be given. That the wife thus reverence
her husband is the will of God and the law of the relation.
Fear not, for I am with you;

Be not dismayed, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you,

Yes, I will help you,

I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’ Isaiah 41:10

The scope of these verses is to silence the fears, and encourage the faith, of the
servants of God in their distresses. Perhaps it is intended, in the first place, for the
support of God’s Israel, in captivity; but all that faithfully serve God through patience and
comfort of this scripture may have hope. And it is addressed to Israel as a single person,
that it might the more easily and readily be accommodated and applied by every Israelite
indeed to himself. That is a word of caution, counsel, and comfort, which is so often
repeated, Fear thou not; and again (v. 13), Fear not; and (v. 14), "Fear not, thou worm
Jacob; fear not the threatenings of the enemy, doubt not the promise of thy God; fear not
that thou shalt perish in thy affliction or that the promise of thy deliverance shall fail.’’ It is
against the mind of God that his people should be a timorous people. For the
suppressing of fear he assures them,

I. That they may depend upon his presence with them as their God, and a God all-
sufficient for them in the worst of times. Observe with what tenderness God speaks, and
how willing he is to let the heirs of promise know the immutability of his counsel, and
how desirous to make them easy: "Fear thou not, for I am with thee, not only within call,
but present with thee; be not dismayed at the power of those that are against thee, for I
am thy God, and engaged for thee. Art thou weak? I will strengthen thee. Art thou
destitute of friends? I will help thee in the time of need. Art thou ready to sink, ready to
fall? I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness, that right hand which is
full of righteousness, in dispensing rewards and punishments,’’ Ps. 48:10. And again (v.
13) it is promised, 1. That God will strengthen their hands, that is, will help them: "I will
hold thy right hand, go hand in hand with thee’’ (so some): he will take us by the hand as
our guide, to lead us in our way, will help us up when we are fallen or prevent our falls;
when we are weak he will hold us up-wavering, he will fix us-trembling, he will
encourage us, and so hold us by the right hand, Ps. 73:23. 2. That he will silence their
fears: Saying unto thee, Fear not. He has said it again and again in his word, and has
there provided sovereign antidotes against fear: but he will go further; he will by his Spirit
say it to their hearts, and make them to hear it, and so will help them.

Ref: Henry, M. (1996, c1991). Matthew Henry's commentary on the whole Bible :
Complete and unabridged in one volume. Peabody: Hendrickson.