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Himself has no interest at all in sweet things. So all this cake stuff has been very boring for him. Nevertheless, he has been monumentally patient as I drone on beside him, chatting away to myself about caster sugar versus demerara sugar versus golden syrup. So there we were one day, me bouncing ideas off him (i.e. forcing him to sit and endure while basically I intoned, Cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, over and over again) and somehow the conversation strayed on to Millionaires Shortbread and how hard it would be to make. To my great surprise, he suddenly became very animated and stopped looking like a man considering setting himself on fire, sat up straight and said, No, its really easy! I used to make it when I was a teenager! I cant tell you! It was like discovering he was secretly Argentinian and had enjoyed a moderately successful career as a polo player in his twenties. Intrigued, I pressed him further for details and this is what he gave me.
Makes 16 For the base 225g plain our 80g caster sugar 175g butter, cut into cubes For the caramel layer 400ml sweetened condensed milk* 200g butter 65ml golden syrup (or 4 tablespoons) For the chocolate topping 150g milk chocolate 150g dark chocolate (70% cocoa solids)
* If it comes in a can of 397ml, thats grand. You neednt fret about the missing 3ml.
Butter a 20cm square tin and line the base with baking paper. Make sure the tin is at least 6cm deep. Preheat the oven to 160C/325F/gas 3. Sieve the our into a bowl. Add the sugar and butter. If you have a machine, blitz everything together until you have a sandy-looking mixture, but beware of overmixing you dont want this to turn into a dough. If you dont have a machine, Im afraid youll have to rub in the butter by hand. Pile the mix into the prepared tin and prick the surface several times with a fork. Bake for 30 to 40 minutes until its no longer pale-looking. Dont let it overbake and become hard and crusty because youll have trouble down the line when you come to cut it. Leave to cool on a wire rack. Now for the caramel layer. Put the condensed milk, butter and golden syrup into a heavy-bottomed saucepan and heat gently. Then, stirring constantly, bring the temperature up until you reach bubbling point and keep it there for 5 to 8 minutes. Dont make the mistake that I did in the rst few minutes of thinking that if the butter was melted, that we were bombs away. Himself came in, took one look at it and said, No, its way too pale, so I had to put the saucepan back on the heat for at least another 10 minutes. Dont be tempted to turn up the heat any further! The caramel must be made over a low heat to avoid it catching and burning. Eventually, the mixture will thicken and darken and change, so that when you allow the mixture to fall o the spoon, it makes light ribbons on the surface of the caramel. Pour the caramel on top of the shortbread base and leave to cool for about an hour. For the chocolate topping, melt the chocolate (see page 20) and pour it over the caramelly layer. Leave to set, but not in the fridge, for at least a couple of hours. Remove from the tin and carefully cut into sixteen cubes.
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Line a 12-hole cupcake tray with paper cases and preheat the oven to 170C/325F/gas 3. First, make the cream cheese layer by beating the cream cheese with the egg, sugar and vanilla extract. Keep it standing by. Make the red velvet mix by melting the butter. Put into a bowl with the sugar and beat well. Next in this exact order! Something to do with chemical jiggery-pokery that I cant explain, but must be observed add the vanilla extract, the cocoa powder, the salt, the food colouring and the vinegar, beating between each addition. In a separate bowl, beat your eggs, then add to the butter/cocoa mix. Sieve in the our and fold through. Divide most of the mix among the paper cases, reserving perhaps a fth. Then, dollop a lump of cream cheese mix into each paper case on top of the red velvet mix. Then, divide the remaining red velvet mix into the paper cases, on top of the cream cheese mix. Now, swirl. You can use a cocktail stick, but I used a bamboo skewer something with a bit of length is nice because you can get right down into the red velvet mix and dredge up its murky depths and twirl and swirl until the red and white mixes are beautifully striped. This is an extremely enjoyable exercise, so enjoyable that I never want to stop, but I must because if I dont, the two mixes will become one and the whole thing will be pointless. Bake for 17 to 20 minutes. Cool fully on a wire rack.
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