This is a story of change. A story of pain. God allows things he is he author of good.

Before you judge my life or my character, walk in my shoes and walk the path. I have travelled life with sorrow, double my fears, pain and my laughter. Remember, Judge not lest ye be judged, Everyone has a story: Words said without thoughts only cause pain where kindness goes a long way. Tonight like many, we reflect our destiny were have we traveled and is our path in the direction. Just like a taught sail that needs to be trimmed into the wind navigation on. However nor we taken into account a little 2 degree off, we can have difficult situation information we place onto it. My reflections of my life will have the same encounters of a changing variety of storms, hurts and pains, but I trim my sails knowing conditions can be turbulent on the life of sailing. In being a father, my children who have now grown up without their father because of early separation, my thoughts and prayers can only engage the auto pilot. I can only do so much and then Gods love and his ability and trust we will connect. I learnt this much as life issues burnt in my heart and seared my mind, that I would never give up on Gods precious children. I surrendered my ones to God completely, just like God had given them to me from birth. God allowed me to see the Spirit of Orphan working upon families, because God, As you come to him a living stone rejected by men but in the sight of God chosen and precious 1 Peter 2V4, chose to show me. The solution to Gods way is to adopt the father in him. Never pulling them away, Learn to do good, seek justice. Rebuke the oppressor. Defend the fatherless plead for the widow, Isaiah 1V17.

Encouraging them in his ways. The road is a school of hard knocks, but helping in the long run, I never stopped because God encouraged me through discouragement . When I knew it was the family, God wants to bring to in relationship, not just parents or children, I found rejection operating in the beginning. , I found the power of Gods acceptance and that I had since birth. My mother decided to have me aborted Things changed. Dad didnt walk out but stayed. The process was the seed was based on rejection. Gods acceptance made me learn. I needed to accept and let go of my pre-conceived ideas about my parents. Not knowing this I abandoned my 1st son, telling my ex wife that I was going to leave her. As I got delivered and healed from this seed, God birthed in me a ;Never let go of; no matter and his determination in me. I have learnt grace and as I traveled, I found many young persons drawn to me by God that also had deep emotional chasm. One in particular held on to his moulded life. I adopted him and his life of past hurts, made a fatal decision another young person came to get help but I wasnt listening to God. He hanged himself from the clothes line. No one was listening to his cry. My life changed from that day. Life is precious and hangs in the balance of availability. What people say incorrectly and our words that are supposed to be spoken in life. Reflecting on my conversion when I gave my life to God, I ended up behind bars. Hey God, could have got me off. Hes like that as he looks after his children but I accepted his will not mine. For he wanted me to help myself but others. It wasnt easy, ask anyone 3 years, but God was with me. One night I was asking him How do you feel when one of your children are weeping and really

feeling in the dumps? Well, I was by the wayTo my surprise, drops of warm tears fell on my crown. Jesus said Thats how I feel about you. My sense of understanding changed to a deeper sense of compassion. While in the community, many people came to stay with me. It was like a extended family, half way house. Parents who got to know me asked for help. These guys and girls just wanted to hang with us. God gave me the skill of communication. Often I felt uncomfortable as outsiders viewed things in their boxes. Society accountability and their opinions seemed werent doing much themselves as for improving these lives more making them more rejected and rebellious. Dont get me wrong, parents want the best for their children. Some children need lots of encouragement and prayer to honour their parents. Being obedient . as well parents need to be challenged on do not provoke your children to anger . Its a process and does have rewarding challenging aspects..its as well ; Summing up, parents and children not fearing God verses fear issues in life, but whos behind destruction . No parent or child. Powers to destroy or powers to repair and heal...the devil has come as a thief. To steal , kill and destroy .john.10v10 Jesus came to give life first , to be obedient gives life, and listen to Gods word. Myself I asked, God what he wanted me to do to help. He showed me a life changing experience so easy to understand but you have to walk the way the good samatarian walked. The lost hurt soul struck down by life issues. He showed him compassion in the action. He acknowledged spent time with him gave his finances but God showed me as well when I had nothing. You came to me, you made a place for me at your table. You feed me, you clothed me housed me, and when you did this, you did it for me. Sometimes we feel its better to refer people to counselors, physiatrists, or

ministers but who are we in God. We need to know that by God alone. That word scares some, some will say, Who do you think you are?. Mans fall was like that when tempted but when you know God loves you, you are neighbour. The only thing left to say is, who is my neighbour? I do believe in driving vehicles, I love them, often to bits, but we need to operate them properly. When you get into a vehicle, called compassion its connected to the best manufacturer who will never let you down. It will only operate always if you drive it like a good Samaritan. Unfortunately, GPS (old ones) get confused and then you get harassed by the wrong voice. I prefer NZ voice, however, when you have to drive with God, he will direct you and show you that the old GPS is a terrorist in disguise, giving you the wrong advice and speaking the incorrect words sending you to the wrong place. Damaging vehicles can be very costly. God is our best friend. He created us and loves us with passion. Even when we are a fool, God loves us then I can be a fool for the king of my love. There is always a cost, God paid the biggest price. Jesus, he commanded us to forgive one another and pray for one another to be healed. If we as parents got fixed, first our children would have a better walk when times are hard. God sends his friends to help not to hinder. However, misunderstandings do happen. Never stop listening to your children now matter how old they are. Out of the mouth of babes comes praise. Children are close to God and his angels and we might get a surprise when we are told to behave! It makes me humble. Gods ways as for in Mathew 11 says For John came neither eating nor drinking and they say, He has a demon. The son of man came eating and drinking and they say, look at glutten and a

winebibber, a friend of tax collectors and sinners, but wisdom is justified by her children. We need to repent us. Who do we reflect on our journey? To those that we love or to be loved?

I was lost when you found me. You pulled me close and held me near. I am a fool but still you love me. I will be a fool for the king of love. You gave me wings so I could fly. You gave me a song to color the sky and all I have is all from you and all I want is all of you. Its grace, your grace. I am nothing without you. Your grace shines on me. There has been days when I walked away. Too much to carry, nothing left to say. Forgive me Lord, when I am weak and lost for you traded heaven for a wooden cross and all these years you have carried me. You have been my eyes when I could not see and beauty grows in the driving rain. Your oil of gladness in the times of pain, shines on me, shines on me, your grace is shines on me, shine on me your grace. Love covers all sins The greatest is love All passes away Love remains with me How about you?

I ask you to consider a deeper walk and relationship

in God that will transform you and reach out to the lost if so I suggest I pray with you a prayer . Dear God.i confess I am guilty of breking your laws many times ./confess theevents that come to mind / I am truly sorry I now turn away from those things that offend you and ask your forgiveness. Thankyou for dying on the cross to take the consequences of my sin on yourself I now invite the holy spirit to enter my life to be the person you want me to be . please change me in those areas where I have a deeper compassion for the lost and a desire to see as you do I want to love as you love me , please give me a deep revelation in my heart , my life as you are in mine thankyou father in jesus name amen.