Documente Academic
Documente Profesional
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Anil Sainani
Inside-out
The primary and secondary greatness The power of a paradigm The power of a paradigm shift Being and seeing The principle centered paradigm Principles of growth and change The way we see problem is the problem
Psychic determinism upbringing, childhood experience, past emotional scripting. Environmental determinism School, spouse, boss, economic situation, national policies etc.
Pavlovian Theory
Stimulus
Response
To what extent the theory holds good? Does it become a self-fulfilling prophecy?
Self-awareness
Imagination
Conscience Independent will
Psychiatrist raised in Freudian tradition. Lost everyone except his one sister in the Nazi camps. Suffered torture and innumerable indignities. Lived extremely precarious and uncertain life. Yet proactively made use of the unique human endowments.
He decided that he would not let his present adversely affect him. He discovered the fundamental human principle - Between stimulus and response human beings have the the ultimate freedom the freedom to choose.
Frankl exercised his small embryonic freedom; it grew larger and larger, until he had more freedom than his Nazi captors. He became an inspiration to those around him including some guards. He helped others find meaning in their sufferings and dignity in their existence.
Proactive Model
Stimulus
Freedom to Choose
Response
Self Awareness
Imagination
Independent Will
Conscience
Proactivity Defined
I assume responsibility for my life. I accept that my behavior is a function of my decisions and not conditions. I can subordinate my feelings to values. I have the initiative to make things happen.
Blame circumstances conditions or conditioning Are defensive Are driven by feelings & impulses Their responses are instant and not thought over Blame others for their actions.
Do not blame circumstances, conditions or conditioning Are open minded Are driven by carefully thought over and selected values They choose their response Assume responsibility for their actions
We need to understand that unless we assume responsibility for our behavior, we cannot think of changing it
It is our willing permission, our consent, our response to what happens to us, that hurts us far more than what happens to us in the first place Things can hurt us physically and economically and can cause sorrow. But our character, our basic identity, does not have to be hurt at all What matters most is how we respond to what we experience in life
Our basic nature is to act and not be acted upon. Yet majority of the people wait for something to happen or someone to take care of them. Use your R & I. Holding people to the responsible course is not demeaning, it is affirming their basic nature; it is awakening their dormant muscles of proactivity.
Different Circles
No Concern
Circle of Concern
Circle of Influence
Proactive Focus
Circle of
Circle of Influence
Concern
Reactive Focus
Circle of
Circle of Influence
Concern
3 Types of Problems
Direct Control problems involving our own behavior Indirect Control problems involving other peoples behavior. No Control We can do nothing about them.
In choosing our response to the circumstance, we could powerfully affect our circumstance
Being Proactive doesnt mean that one has to be pushy, aggressive or insensitive
We are free to choose our actions, but we are not free the choose the consequences of those actions. Fixed & Variable Consequences:
Mistakes are out in the Circle of Concern We cannot undo them. Reactive approach being defensive; often involving rationalization (rational lies) to self and to others. Proactive approach acknowledge it fast, correct and learn from it. Our response to any mistake affects the quality of the next moment.
Using self awareness and conscience, we become aware of our S&W and O&T.
Using imagination and independent will, we develop and act on our plan/goals
It essentially means that our honor is more important than our moods.
Work only on the circle of influence. Make small commitments and keep them. Be a light not a judge. Be a model not a critic. Be part of the solution, not part of the problem. Look at the weaknesses of others with compassion, not accusation.
The fountain of content must spring up in the mind, and he who hath so little knowledge of human nature to as to seek happiness by changing anything but his own disposition, will waste his life in fruitless efforts and multiply the grief that he proposes to remove
Samuel Johnson