COMMUNICATION 101

What is it?
from Latincommnicre, meaning "to share
thepurposefulactivity
ofinformationexchange between two or
more participantsin order to convey or
receive the intendedmeaningsthrough a
shared system ofsignsandsemioticrules.

ENGLISH COMMUNICATION
Englishis aWest Germanic languagethat was first
spoken inearly medieval Englandand is now a
globallingua franca (trade language).
It is anofficial languageofalmost 60 sovereign
states, the most commonly spoken language in
theUnited Kingdom, theUnited
States,Canada,Australia, Ireland, andNew
Zealand, and a widely spoken language in countries
in theCaribbean, Africa, and South Asia.

ENGLISH IS A QUEER
LANGUAGE
We'll begin with box, and the plural is boxes ,
But the plural of ox is oxen , not "oxes"
Then one fowl is a goose and two are geese ,
Yet the plural of moose would never be "meese,"
You may find a lone mouse or a whole lot of mice ,
But the plural of house is houses , not "hice."
If the plural of man is always men ,
Why shouldnt the plural of pan be "pen"?

Cow in the plural may be cows or kine .

But the plural of vow is vows , not "vine."
I speak of a foot and you show me your feet .
I give you a boot ; would you call a pair "beet"?
If the singular is tooth and the plural teeth ,
Why shouldnt the plural of booth be "beeth"?
If the singular is this, and the plural is these ,
Should the plural of kiss rightly be "keese"?

Then, with ONE you use that and with THREE, those ,
Yet the plural of hat is never called "hose."
We speak of a brother and also of brethren ;
But though we say mother , we never say "methren."
The masculine pronouns are he, his and him ,
But imagine the feminine as she , "shis," and "shim."
So English, I think -- and you must agree
Is a language as queer as any youll see.

I think you already know

Of TOUGH and BOUGH and COUGH and DOUGH,
Others may stumble, but not you
On HICCOUGH, THOROUGH, and THROUGH.
Well done! And now you wish, perhaps,
To learn of new familiar traps?
Beware of HEARD, as a dreadful word
That looks like BEARD and sounds like BIRD.
And DEAD; its said like bed, not BEAD
For goodness sake dont call it DEED!

Watch out for MEAT and GREAT and THREAT

They rhyme with SUITE and STRAIGHT and DEBT.
A MOTH is not a MOTH on MOTHER
Nor BOTH in BOTHER or in BROTHER.
And HERE is not match for THERE.
Nor DEAR and FEAR for BEAR and PEAR.
And there are DOSE and ROSE and LOSE
Just look them up and GOOSE and CHOOSE,
And CORK and WORK and CARD and WARD,

And FONT and FRONT, and WORD and SWORD.

And DO and GO and THWART and CART
Come, come, Ive hardly made a start!
A dreadful language? Man alive,
Id mastered it when I was five.