Descriptive Writing

Describing People

I had always been close to my grandfather, far closer than my

siblings, as with their schoolwork and their exams they had
little spare time for an old man in an armchair, and yet it was
that which so endeared him to me, as if the fact that he could
not often move beyond that armchair marred his life not at all,
as if indeed the chair became his life. Everything I could ever
need was in that chair, or within childs reach of it, and the
occupants off-colour jokes and wisecracks about those nuts
in parliament made his room home for me as much as my
own.
It was difficult to think of him as he had once been. He had
been a soldier, someone who was prepared to sacrifice his life
for his country. Now he had shrunk to a size shorter than me,
his cheeks had sunk in, his skin was covered in ageing spots
and his hair had nearly all gone. He walked with difficulty and,
because he was too proud to use a stick, you had to watch to
make sure he didnt fall over which he did quite regularly.
Yet this was the man who had taught me everything that was
worth learning to stand up for my beliefs, to challenge what I
knew was wrong, to cheat at cards, and to belch and break

The example you have just looked at

what clearly a positive depiction of the
character in question.
What about making the old person
sitting in the chair (slightly) scary?

Now lets read the following from Great

Expectations by Charles Dickens.
This extract describes the main
protagonist Pip meeting an old lady
called Miss Havisham for the first time:

Whether I should have made out this object so soon, if there had been no
fine lady sitting at it, I cannot say. In an arm-chair, with an elbow resting
on the table and her head leaning on that hand, sat the strangest lady I
have ever seen, or shall ever see.
She was dressed in rich materials satins, and lace, and silks all of
white. Her shoes were white. And she had a long white veil dependent
from her hair, and she had bridal flowers in her hair, but her hair was
white. Some bright jewels sparkled on her neck and on her hands, and
some other jewels lay sparkling on the table. Dresses, less splendid than
the dress she wore, and half-packed trunks, were scattered about. She
had not quite finished dressing, for she had but one shoe on the other
was on the table near her hand her veil was but half arranged, her
watch and chain were not put on, and some lace for her bosom lay with
those trinkets, and with her handkerchief, and gloves, and some flowers,
and a prayer-book, all confusedly heaped about the looking-glass.

It was not in the first few moments that I saw all these things, though
I saw more of them in the first moments than might be supposed.
But, I saw that everything within my view which ought to be white,
had been white long ago, and had lost its lustre, and was faded and
yellow. I saw that the bride within the bridal dress had withered like
the dress, and like the flowers, and had no brightness left but the
brightness of her sunken eyes. I saw that the dress had been put
upon the rounded figure of a young woman, and that the figure upon
which it now hung loose, had shrunk to skin and bone. Once, I had
been taken to see some ghastly waxwork at the Fair, representing I
know not what impossible personage lying in state. Once, I had been
taken to one of our old marsh churches to see a skeleton in the ashes
of a rich dress that had been dug out of a vault under the church
pavement. Now, waxwork and skeleton seemed to have dark eyes
that moved and looked at me. I should have cried out, if I could.

Before we go any further try to answer the following

questions. You should give as much detail as you can. Try
to write a paragraph for each question. Your responses
should focus upon how the writer has achieved these
particular effects. Try to include examples and refer to
specific techniques the author has used.

1. What do you think has happened to Miss Havisham?

2. How has she been living for a very long time?
3. How does Dickens make her seem scary, unreal? What
comparisons does he make?
4. What impression do you get of Miss Havisham?

This next extract is taken from a short horror story

called Dead Language Master by Joan Aiken.

Mr Fletcher taught us Latin. He was the shape of a domino.

No, thats wrong, because he wasnt square; he looked as
though he had been cut out of a domino. He had shape but no
depth, you felt as though he could have slipped through the
crack at the hinge of a door if hed gone sideways. Though I
daresay if he had really been able to do that he would have
made more use of the faculty; he was great at stealing quietly
along a passage and then opening the door really fast to see
what we were all up to; he used to drift about silently, like an
old ghost, but if you had a keen sense of smell you always had
advance warning of his arrival because of the capsule of
cigarette smoke that he moved about in. He smoked non-stop;
he used a holder, but even so his fingers were yellow up to the
knuckles and so were his teeth when he bared them in a
horse-grin. He had dusty black hair that hung in a lank flop
over his big square forehead, and his feet were enormous;
they curved as he put them down, like a ducks flippers,
which, I suppose, was why he could move so quickly....If
someone kicked up a disturbance at the back of the classroom
hed first screw up his eyes and stick his head out, so that he
looked like a snake, weaving his head about to try and focus

None of our lot cared greatly for Latin, we didnt see

the point of it, so we didnt have much in common
with old Fletcher. We thought he was a funny old
coot, a total square he used words like topping
and ripping which he must have picked out of the
Boys Own Paper in the nineteen-tens. He was dead
keen on his subject and would have taught it quite
well if anyone had been interested; the only time
you saw a wintry smile light up his yellow face was
when he was pointing out the beauties of some
construction in Livy or Horace.

N.B. The last sentence is referring to varying

sentence construction in the works of two Latin

By looking at the extract,

complete the grid below
stating as many examples as
you can:

MrFletcher

Appearance

Example

Whatthisreveals

He had no shape or depth

Makes him seem like hes not

really there

Smell

Actions

Whathesays

Whatothersthinkof
him