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17 SEP 2019
start today with hopes for an increase ports to grow by 2%. The worldwide became the first woman for fifty-six
in the worldwide moose population dominance of Canada shows no signs years, and the oldest competitor ever,
compared to last year’s disapointing of abating though with this year’s to claim the gold medal. She walked
figures. Among the traditional early moose population expected to match away with her million dollar share of
reporters were Egypt, returning fig- the prize money, runner up Tommy
last year’s record figures of one hun-
ures of six moose, a twenty percent dred million billion. Thompson from Nigeria taking half a
increase on 2011’s figures of five, and million, and third place New Zealan-
Europe’s rise as an international
Uruguay whose moose population re- moose power will slow slightly thisder John Smith receiving a warm
mains stable at eleven. year as a response to the European handshake from the umpire.
According to Robbie McRobson, Union’s move towards standardising Having started the tournament a
head of the UN Moose Preserva- the European moose. Stringent qual-rank outsider she began to impress
tion Council, worldwide moose num- ity controls are holding back the de-
in her second match when she took
bers are expected to grow markedly velopment of the eastern european US number three Ron Ronson by sur-
on last year due to the traditional populations compared to last year prise and subdued him in twenty sec-
moose strongholds of Canada and the when they contributed significantlyonds with her unique move that has
United States, with the larger de- to europe’s strong growth figures. been dubbed "Maud’s Death Grip".
veloping moose ecologies also poised Norway, which is not an EU member The injection of a new wrestling style
to make gains. The largest percent- but has observer status, strengthedinto the tournament was welcomed
agege increase in moose will likely in numbers relative to the Euro area
by spectators and Johnson’s pre- and
come from China’’, says McRobson, with numbers of Norweigian moose, post-match breakdances have proved
The Chinese government has invested known locally as elk’’ expected to rise
entertaining to fans. However, she
heavily in moose infrastructure over for the tenth consecutive year, partic-
was still not expected to win in
the past decade, and their committ- ularly thanks to a strong showing in
round three last Wednesday, facing
ment to macrofauna is beginning to the last quarter. off against title-holder Paulo "Spine-
pay dividends’’. Since 2004 China has As moose season reaches its close,
Snapper" Lutti, of Vatican City. Un-
expanded moose pasture from 1.5% researchers world wide are turning to
derdog Johnson was soon showing her
of arable land to nearly 3.648% and science in an attempt to boost nextworth with stamina and agility easily
moose numbers are expected to rise year’s figures. NASA stunned the matching last year’s winner. Lutti’s
to 60,000 making China a net moose scientific community today with theexperience paid off initially as he took
exporter for the first time. This is announcment of their discovery thatthe first two rounds, but as John-
good news for neighbouring Mongo- the moon is significantly smaller than
son became more confident her su-
lia, a barren moose-wasteland whose previously believed. This conclusion,
perior strength came to the fore and
inhabitents nonetheless have an insa- which is the conclusion of a ten- she clawed back two rounds to take
tiable desire for the creatures. The in- year collaborative project, will have
the contest into a decider. By this
crease in Beijing-Ulanbataar trade is profound implications for the moosetime Lutti’s body language indicated
anticipated to relieve pressure on the community as the gravitational field
that he already felt overawed by the
relatively strained Russian suppliers, is now known to be of the right pretender to his crown, and the new-
but increase Mongolia’s imbalance of strength to support moose in orbit.comer took advantage of this to en-
trade with its larger neighbour. According to John Johnson, headgage a mutual headlock which she
Historically the only competitor of the NASA Moon Sizing Experi- held for three hours until the Vat-
to China in the far eastern moose ment the first delivery of moose into
ican man retired from exhaustion.
markets has been Singapore but the low moon orbit could be achieved asThe next seven matches were barely
tiny island nation is set to report a early as the third quarter of next year.
a contest as the news of Johnson’s
net loss, expecting a decrease of more The technology to nurture moose in supremacy overawed all her oppo-
than five percent on last year’s 50,000 space is available now’’, he said, ’’all
nents who became too indimidated to
moose counted. The head of Singa- that is needed is political will’’.fight properly.
pore’s Agency for Agriculture, Jing- Nigerian Tommy Thompson is
Feng Lau, explained to an incredu- Granny wins also a relative newcomer to the
lous Singaporean parliament yester- wrestling scene, but with his 210lb
day that bad weather had contributed World Wrestling frame he was expected to fare well
to this season’s poor showing, most against Johnson who weighs in at
notably when a cargo of 150 moose Championship only 90lb. However Johnson’s lithe
were swept out into the Indian ocean and slender, some would say scrawny,
in a monsoon. By ROY MCROYSTON
figure belies her agility and strength
Yet again the global demand for which she demonstrated by holding
moose will be met largely by the Thompson above her head several
US and Canada. The recession-hit Records were smashed in times during the bout and throwing
States is taking comfort in its moose Nicaragua’s World Wrestling Cham- him into the crowd once. With the
growth figures with gross production pionship last night as 78-year-old scores tied at 2-2 time ran out and the
expected to break 700,000 and net ex- Maud Johnson, grandmother of five, contest went to a panel of judges to be
Aripi pentru Tineri 17 SEP 2019 3
assessed. They awarded Thompson a ing my daughter’s car to the end of over the next year. She will also be
C grade whilst Johnson received an the road and back whenever I felt my promoting Tupperware, Halliburton,
A, becoming the first grandmother to arthritis was OK" she said. Sammy the Republic of Macedonia, and Gala
ever win the title. added "I always knew she could do Bingo. Her continued participation in
The new champion explained her it. She’s my grandma.". The young- the sport is not assured as she wants
success as the result of a strict train- ster is also her manager and has re- to spend more time on her bungee-
ing regimen instituted by her coach portedly arranged sponsorship deals jumping business, and knitting. Ev-
and grandson five-year-old Sammy which will dwarf her one million dol- eryone here at the World Champi-
Johnson. "I’ve been drinking ten lar prize fund. Her new contract with onships, however, hopes for her re-
raw eggs for breakfast every morning, headband designer Nike alone is set turn.
sprinting fifty miles a day and carry- to earn her fourteen billion dollars